I love-love-love this show. It's like the white version of Flavor of Love, but the guy they're all fighting after is actually good-looking.

What I think of the chicks who got kicked off (or, some of them):

Rodeo: Freakin' nutcase!! Thank god she went home. "That's why I wear my cowboy hat.. that's why.. children love me..." *snif snif* AUGH! Scary as ****.

Dallas: She was damn sexy, but a total b****. I also highly doubt she was ever interested in Bret.

Tamara: This chick confused me. I think she just got really, really nervous around Bret, or else she was doing heavy drugs. She really didn't make any sense when she spoke, but in her after-elimination-interview, she almost sounded intelligent.

Brandi C: I was so, SO sad to see her go home! She was one of my favorite girls. She may not have been smart, but she was genuine and loveable. I think she was one of the few girls really there to be with Bret, and he sent her home--sadly, a date with Sam would make ANYONE look young and immature.

Erin: I hope she got to bang Justin Timberlake.

Magdalena: I liked her, not a huge amount, but enough. Still, she gave me oodles of enjoyment when everyone was inhaling helium and, when she did--she sounded like a normal girl! Ahaha.. ha.... ah...

As for the girls left in the house?

Mia: He keeps holding on to her because he doesn't know her that well--so why didn't he keep a bunch of other girls for that reason? She bores me, I almost forget she's on the show. They may be keeping her because she's the only brunette left (Lacey doesn't count). I can't see her being with Bret.

Lacey: Crazy! I initially liked her a lot, and I admire her love for the animals, but it does seem hypocritical for her to want to be with a guy who hunts, eats meat, and wears leather. I can't see her being with Bret.

Heather: Strippertastic! I think, honestly, she would make the best choice for Bret, because she won't be super-upset when he dumps her a few weeks after the show ends. For her sake, though, I hope he doesn't pick her, and I hope she gets an "I love Heather" show or something. I can't see her being with Bret.

Jes: Note, people, her name is spelled with ONE S. I think this girl is ridiculously beautiful. Her face is perfect, she has a great body, and her hair is freakin' fantastic. Still, I don't think she's all that interested in Bret, and when it comes down to it, I don't think she's laid-back enough for him--we'll see, though, maybe she has more to show. I can't see her being with Bret.

Brandi M: I love this girl. I think she's smokin' hot, and I love her accent. "Take that stick out of your #####, Richard, it was a joke." That cracked me up. I think Bret should date Brandi and keep Jes around for both himself and Brandi. They would have hot threesomes. I think Brandi would get along well with his lifestyle, and she seems both laid-back and sincere. She's the one I think could have the most stable relationship with Bret, and if he picks her, I think they'd stay together for a while. I can see her being with Bret.

Sam: I have a soft spot for this girl. When I saw the first episode, I was convinced that he would pick her in the end. When you see has-been rock stars on Cribs, their wife is always hot, but not ridiculously hot, and they seem like intelligent, calm girls. What I'm trying to say is, if Bret ever goes on Cribs, I can easily picture Sam being out on the porch, being introduced as his wife, then fading quietly into the background. I think if Bret quit the show and spent a few weeks with her, they'd be engaged by the end of it. Still, I don't think he's looking for marriage, and I think she wants too serious a commitment from him. I can see her being with Bret, but I don't think it'll happen.

Am I right? We'll see.