So you didn't watch Bret, sickened by too much drinking, go to bed early while Brandy M (BM) spewed Champagne on Magdalena? Do you not want to discuss Erin & Erin (thats an Erin for each soccer ball) wishing they could go home because Justin Timberlake was going to be at the club? You didn't see Jess and Heather battling in the mud for MVP and a solo date with Bret? Well those are the highlights. The cliffhanger was Heather and Erin-Erin were nominated for elimination. The trashy moment was Bret commenting that Erin-Erin might be using him to put another notch on her bedpost and adamantly announcing that HE PUTS THE NOTCHES ON THE BEDPOST, not the women. (This is where you don't have to be hungover to want to vomit. Gu-head. Come back and read more later.) Another highlight was the announcement by Jess that Bret is a really good kisser. Women the world over slept better last night knowing that. Another highlight was someone ripping off Heather's pants while she ran for a touchdown. Bret noted that Heather just can't seem to keep her clothes on. But one of the cutest little events in the house was Erin knocking on Bret's door to discuss the notches thing, him blowing her off, then closing the door and going back to sit on the couch in his room with Lacey, who had been there the whole time. Ok, if you didn't watch it and don't want to see any one of the 20 or more replays this week, Erin was eliminated. She announced afterwards that she has LOTS of guys back in Chicago and she's been with better celebs than Bret. She also ranted about Heather being a 32 year old stripper, although she failed to mention that the 32 year old stripper still has the body for it. She is certain that the 32 year old stripper will end up being a 60 year old stripper living in a trailer park with 4 kids and an overweight husband, before leaving to rejoin all those men and celebs back in Chi-town.
Next week: The girls learn to use that pole and I'll just bet that Bret tells us it's a turn on and he's horny.

Charter Member: Club Anti-DAW