beckettrep: >>"If you are who you say you are then who was the poster using the name MissSituationMan (or something very similar to that)? If that was also you then how come you're using another name now?"<<

I was wondering the same thing about the name change.

To Nikai I say ... I hope you are who you say you are. If so, you sound like you got the lesson you, Niambi, and a whole lot of girls, women, & I'm sure men need to get. If everyone quit allowing players like LowLifeSituationDog into their lives, they would never be able to continue playing their games and destroying a lot of precious hearts along the way. (I refuse to use the term "man" in reference to "Situation" ... he doesn't deserve it, hasn't earned it!) The only reason users like him ever continue is because someone buys their game. Not saying I've never done it ... we probably all have cared about someone not good for us at some point in our lives. Thankfully I learned at an early age that I'd rather be alone than be emotionally beat up.

My daughter got out of a bad relationship about a year ago. We were thankful. But I found out later, after a few months she went back to him for a time. I recently asked her why she went back and what made her able to leave for good. She said she went back because she just didn't know what to do about the hurt & lonliness. She'd never experienced anything like it (she began dating him within 2 weeks of moving away from home to a college out of state where she didn't know anyone before arriving.) She dated him for 2 years and she had few other friends since all their friends were those he'd had before she showed up in his life. He also kept her very isolated. She didn't know how to start over on her own since she'd spent her first years away from home with him in her life. She knew he was bad for her when she went back with him but had never known lonliness or what to do about it. She found her way and has found out she CAN survive lonliness, feeling like cr@p, and the hurt involved in it all and says she now knows what she would need to do if/when it happens again.

I hope you know the hurt DOES get better and you will survive. And when the sun shines again, you'll realize just how cloudy it was the entire time you were involved with someone who only cares about his needs ... not yours. We all know his kind. They can say just the right things, make you feel what you long to feel, promise you the world you long to live, show you they can be the man you've always dreamed of .... until you give in. Then they become the user, taker, selfish, uncaring player they really are. They've learned what women love, what they dream of and can play the "role" but can't live the life. When they come crawling back and reignite the feelings & the dreams ... remember THAT IS THE ROLE ... that isn't the person they are! I asked my daughter what she'd tell others going thru that hurt. She said ... never forget their true character -- it will tell you who is most important in his life (himself) ... then GET BUSY ... work out at a gym he doesn't know about, run, take dance classes, martial arts, a new sport, anything physical ... and volunteer. It gets you outside your own pain and makes you see how great your life really is. Do both around people similar in age. Make a bunch of new friends, especially while volunteering - they are usually more giving people less interested in their appearance and that they are seen at the right places by the right people. There are "takers" everywhere but if you've really learned from this experience, you can spot them a mile away. You'll always know to R-U-N. They play a great game but in the end they, and those closely connected, will always loose.

And last ... before dating anyone, ask yourself ... if I had a teenage daughter, would I be comfortable with her dating a guy like this?

Good luck .... I hope you are who you say you are because it sounds like you got the message and are too smart to ever let anyone destroy your heart like that again. There really are guys out there that couldn't stand breaking your heart.