*sigh* Been there, done that. We'll call that the first marriage.
What's missing, for me, from your questions/comments is any reference to kids. We had two who were quite young, and that impacted my actions greatly. Forgive might be too strong, but I was willing to try to work through that for the sake of saving the family unit, because I had a really hard time imagining a split family.
Obviously things did not work out keeping that marriage together, though I think we were able to partner to raise the kids very well. I am very happily remarried, with another child, so from that perspective things turned out okay.
One other comment is about geography. In Canada the family laws do not give any sort of advantage to the "wronged party" in such a situation with respect to dollars or custody of kids. Sounds like that is different from the US.
Now that I have shared too much information, I will go back to wishing this was just a shallow Two-for-Twosday thresd!