Lisapooh's Cornertime With Kismet
<Scene opens with a close-up on Kismet. As she begins speaking, the camera pulls back and we see Lisapooh in slightly damp clothes standing in the corner. The timer reads 20 minutes remaining.>
Welcome back to the Corner SB community. We've had a lot of action here recently. Today we will get to talk with Lisapooh. You spoiler people may remember her as the founder of the Conspiracy Jim and the Boobies theory ©. Lisapooh is a relative newcomer to the Off Topic. However, once she arrived here she took the boards by storm. Chat will never be the same again.
<The camera pulls back and we get a nice shot of Lisa's posterior as she stands facing the wall. She turns and half heartedly shakes hands with Kismet.>
Thank you for 'agreeing' to be interviewed Lisapooh. First of all why are you in the corner today, and who sent you
I got into lots of trouble in the bar last night. First Ebug swore at me ... total potty mouth. So I threatened to do some of my patented kickbox maneuvers on her. Then Sherpa lit a bowl. Next thing I know GT and JV slap handcuffs on me and I end up here. Oh yeah, Surv and I kinda tried to overthrow the government but that was earlier in the evening.
Minor offenses it sounds to me like you were unjustly punished. Unfortunately, once you are here, noone can help you until your time has been served. Would you care to tell us how you found SB and why you stayed?
I started coming here early on in S2. I was completely obsessed with Survivor the first season and had quite a large circle of similarly obsessed friends. But this season, I had just moved and started a new job. In my real life, I'm very introverted shy.
Anyway, I had no one to vent all my Survivor angst to. And I had absolutely nothing to do at my new job (that hasn't really changed). I tried SS and read the boards- I thought they were idiots. I had heard about SB during the first season but had never visited. I'm really glad I did. 99.37% of you are very nice. Although for the record not one person greeted me when
I first posted. I'm still harboring some resentment about that.
<Kismet shields her eyes from the very hot stage lights. She points to a far corner. The camera follows and we catch a brief glimpse of GT beating the crap out of Ebug>
As you can see, Ebug spends almost as much time here as I do. If you will take a number you can have a go at her next. You have become a 'bar lesbian'. For the record would you care to explain?
Frankly I'm an attention whore Kismet. Chicks dig me, and I let them. Is that so wrong? < She crosses and uncrosses legs for the camera.>
So you are not a lesbian but you play one on the internet. Okay, name the poster(s) who you would like to have a
relationship with if you were a lesbian. Could you also explain why? <edited out grumbling about sex talk for ratings>
How can I choose? All the ladies are lovely.and each so very very special and unique.
Chick seduced me - it was magical. She'll always hold a special place in my heart.. She's a bi though so it can't last. I've heard
Aym's hips are double jointed.
And Kis, I find your interrogation tactics strangely tittalating too (hehe I said tittilating).
E is always asking me to come over to her house for "snacks" what's up with THAT?
GT has exceptional pot and years -- I'm talking YEARS - of experience .
Mist, T, Vamps, OFG and Dangerkitty - got a girl crush on all of them.
And Mel, well *I* love her the most.
But if I can only have one, it must be moonbaby - she laughs at all my jokes and she cracks me up.
Lets just change the subject before things really get out of hand, shall we? You have a very cute nickname. Why did you choose it?
My family calls me Pooh. I had a Pooh bear as a kid that I toted everywhere, and I liked the books a lot too. As most of you know, I have a Pooh tattoo on my shoulder I'm thinking I should have gone for something sexier and more mysterious on here. I'm open to suggestions
How often do people tease you about the elementary connotations of 'pooh'? How do you usually respond to them?
Well some people here have been known to call me- "Lisapoop", "Lisapoo-poo-head". "Dinglepooh". Occasionally, just plain old "#####" - I don't see how that relates to Pooh, but oh well. A few have recognized my regal-ness and christened me "Princess Pooh". Well they haven't yet, but they will dammit! The nay-sayers don't bother me. Usually, I say "pooh-pooh-pooh on you" to anyone who mocks the wonder that is Pooh. If that doesn't work, I cry.
<Kismet adds five minutes to the clock because Lisapooh is a crybaby>
You are one of three Lisa's that frequent this board. What is the best way to tell you apart?
We're all so beautiful, it's easy to get confused. Here's the lowdown: Rio dances on the sand; Itz has cartoonishly big bazooms and I wear red half shirts and shack up with a minor named Christopher.
Is it true that you have a secret 'Lisa' society? Can you tell us about it?
It's more of a sisterhood actually which is why I didn't mention my bookends on the other questions. I can't tell you everything but I can tell you that we've formed a girl group, "The Blow Sisters" I think we have a lot of potential. Currently we are working on covers of old Lisa Lisa songs and maybe a Sweeney Sister medley. We're still working on the choreography. Itz doesn't have hands so the gestures are kind of lost on her.
Your 'Destiny' story was a major success on the boards. Rumor has it that you are a writer in real life. What's the scoop here? <edited Kismet's "poohper scooper" joke>
As long as I can remember I wanted to be a writer. I wasn't allowed to watch a lot of TV as a kid, so I read constantly. I do write lots of short stories and I'm about half way through a novel. Up until recently, I never submitted anything anywhere. I got my first rejection letter a few weeks ago, which was actually kind of cool. One of my favorite quotes is "Leap and the net will appear" It was a big leap for me. Lightening didn't strike. No one laughed at me. The world didn't end. Honestly, I love to put words on paper.Whether I ever get published or not doesn't matter that much. If it's meant to happen, it will.
Tell us some about who you are in real life.
I have a daughter, McKenna. She's five. She fills my heart with the most unbelievable joy - I never thought I could love anyone the way I love that kid. I am truly blessed. I look at her freckles and long eyelashes and it feels like my heart could burst right open. There is not a person on earth I would trade places with. Anyway, the two of us live just north of Dallas. I grew up in a farm town in Indiana and then moved to Las Vegas when I was 10. Spent close to a year in Florida then came to Texas about 8 years ago.
<Edited out Kismet's comments about the Glory of being a Texan>
Is there anything else you would like us to know?
I am really HawkEye, ShakesvivorBlows, MissFrankShankl, Mark Burnett and Jimmy Hoffa. And I would do almost anything for a sig pic. Finally, I think DERK is KEWL
This concludes this broadcast. Who will be the next interviewee? Stay tuned to discover the truth.