Lisapooh's Cornertime With Kismet

<Scene opens with a close-up on Kismet. As she begins speaking, the camera pulls back and we see Lisapooh in slightly damp clothes standing in the corner. The timer reads 20 minutes remaining.>

Welcome back to the Corner SB community. We've had a lot of action here recently. Today we will get to talk with Lisapooh. You spoiler people may remember her as the founder of the Conspiracy Jim and the Boobies theory ©. Lisapooh is a relative newcomer to the Off Topic. However, once she arrived here she took the boards by storm. Chat will never be the same again.

<The camera pulls back and we get a nice shot of Lisa's posterior as she stands facing the wall. She turns and half heartedly shakes hands with Kismet.>

Thank you for 'agreeing' to be interviewed Lisapooh. First of all why are you in the corner today, and who sent you
here?

I got into lots of trouble in the bar last night. First Ebug swore at me ... total potty mouth. So I threatened to do some of my patented kickbox maneuvers on her. Then Sherpa lit a bowl. Next thing I know GT and JV slap handcuffs on me and I end up here. Oh yeah, Surv and I kinda tried to overthrow the government but that was earlier in the evening.

Minor offenses it sounds to me like you were unjustly punished. Unfortunately, once you are here, noone can help you until your time has been served. Would you care to tell us how you found SB and why you stayed?

I started coming here early on in S2. I was completely obsessed with Survivor the first season and had quite a large circle of similarly obsessed friends. But this season, I had just moved and started a new job. In my real life, I'm very introverted shy.

Anyway, I had no one to vent all my Survivor angst to. And I had absolutely nothing to do at my new job (that hasn't really changed). I tried SS and read the boards- I thought they were idiots. I had heard about SB during the first season but had never visited. I'm really glad I did. 99.37% of you are very nice. Although for the record not one person greeted me when
I first posted. I'm still harboring some resentment about that.

<Kismet shields her eyes from the very hot stage lights. She points to a far corner. The camera follows and we catch a brief glimpse of GT beating the crap out of Ebug>

As you can see, Ebug spends almost as much time here as I do. If you will take a number you can have a go at her next. You have become a 'bar lesbian'. For the record would you care to explain?

Frankly I'm an attention whore Kismet. Chicks dig me, and I let them. Is that so wrong? < She crosses and uncrosses legs for the camera.>

So you are not a lesbian but you play one on the internet. Okay, name the poster(s) who you would like to have a
relationship with if you were a lesbian. Could you also explain why? <edited out grumbling about sex talk for ratings>

How can I choose? All the ladies are lovely.and each so very very special and unique.

Chick seduced me - it was magical. She'll always hold a special place in my heart.. She's a bi though so it can't last. I've heard

Aym's hips are double jointed.

And Kis, I find your interrogation tactics strangely tittalating too (hehe I said tittilating).

E is always asking me to come over to her house for "snacks" what's up with THAT?

GT has exceptional pot and years -- I'm talking YEARS - of experience .

Mist, T, Vamps, OFG and Dangerkitty - got a girl crush on all of them.

And Mel, well *I* love her the most.

But if I can only have one, it must be moonbaby - she laughs at all my jokes and she cracks me up.

Lets just change the subject before things really get out of hand, shall we? You have a very cute nickname. Why did you choose it?

My family calls me Pooh. I had a Pooh bear as a kid that I toted everywhere, and I liked the books a lot too. As most of you know, I have a Pooh tattoo on my shoulder I'm thinking I should have gone for something sexier and more mysterious on here. I'm open to suggestions

How often do people tease you about the elementary connotations of 'pooh'? How do you usually respond to them?

Well some people here have been known to call me- "Lisapoop", "Lisapoo-poo-head". "Dinglepooh". Occasionally, just plain old "#####" - I don't see how that relates to Pooh, but oh well. A few have recognized my regal-ness and christened me "Princess Pooh". Well they haven't yet, but they will dammit! The nay-sayers don't bother me. Usually, I say "pooh-pooh-pooh on you" to anyone who mocks the wonder that is Pooh. If that doesn't work, I cry.

<Kismet adds five minutes to the clock because Lisapooh is a crybaby>

You are one of three Lisa's that frequent this board. What is the best way to tell you apart?

We're all so beautiful, it's easy to get confused. Here's the lowdown: Rio dances on the sand; Itz has cartoonishly big bazooms and I wear red half shirts and shack up with a minor named Christopher.

Is it true that you have a secret 'Lisa' society? Can you tell us about it?

It's more of a sisterhood actually which is why I didn't mention my bookends on the other questions. I can't tell you everything but I can tell you that we've formed a girl group, "The Blow Sisters" I think we have a lot of potential. Currently we are working on covers of old Lisa Lisa songs and maybe a Sweeney Sister medley. We're still working on the choreography. Itz doesn't have hands so the gestures are kind of lost on her.

Your 'Destiny' story was a major success on the boards. Rumor has it that you are a writer in real life. What's the scoop here? <edited Kismet's "poohper scooper" joke>

As long as I can remember I wanted to be a writer. I wasn't allowed to watch a lot of TV as a kid, so I read constantly. I do write lots of short stories and I'm about half way through a novel. Up until recently, I never submitted anything anywhere. I got my first rejection letter a few weeks ago, which was actually kind of cool. One of my favorite quotes is "Leap and the net will appear" It was a big leap for me. Lightening didn't strike. No one laughed at me. The world didn't end. Honestly, I love to put words on paper.Whether I ever get published or not doesn't matter that much. If it's meant to happen, it will.

Tell us some about who you are in real life.

I have a daughter, McKenna. She's five. She fills my heart with the most unbelievable joy - I never thought I could love anyone the way I love that kid. I am truly blessed. I look at her freckles and long eyelashes and it feels like my heart could burst right open. There is not a person on earth I would trade places with. Anyway, the two of us live just north of Dallas. I grew up in a farm town in Indiana and then moved to Las Vegas when I was 10. Spent close to a year in Florida then came to Texas about 8 years ago.

<Edited out Kismet's comments about the Glory of being a Texan>

Is there anything else you would like us to know?

I am really HawkEye, ShakesvivorBlows, MissFrankShankl, Mark Burnett and Jimmy Hoffa. And I would do almost anything for a sig pic. Finally, I think DERK is KEWL

This concludes this broadcast. Who will be the next interviewee? Stay tuned to discover the truth.

• RE: Lisapooh's Cornertime with Kismet,Survivorchick, 09:37 PM, 06-27-01
  • The third interviewee?,AyaK, 09:39 PM, 06-27-01
    • RE: The third interviewee?,Survivorchick, 02:08 PM, 06-28-01
• RE: Lisapooh's Cornertime with Kismet,Drive My Car, 09:50 PM, 06-27-01
• RE: Lisapooh's Cornertime with Kismet,aymelek, 09:59 PM, 06-27-01
• RE: Lisapooh's Cornertime with Kismet,boomerang, 11:07 PM, 06-27-01
• RE: Lisapooh's Cornertime with Kismet,George Tirebiter, 00:41 AM, 06-28-01
  • RE: Lisapooh's Cornertime with Kismet,dangerkitty, 01:30 AM, 06-28-01
• Pooh on You!,IceCat, 01:25 AM, 06-28-01
  • RE: Pooh on You!,VampKira, 02:56 AM, 06-28-01
• let sleeping poohs lie,boomerang, 09:00 AM, 06-28-01
  • OMG! OMG! OMG!,Lisapooh, 09:27 AM, 06-28-01
    • RE: OMG! OMG! OMG!,boomerang, 10:09 AM, 06-28-01
• RE: Lisapooh's Cornertime with Kismet,mistofleas, 09:50 AM, 06-28-01
• RE: Lisapooh's Cornertime with Kismet,ItzLisa, 11:31 AM, 06-28-01
• RE: Lisapooh's Cornertime with Kismet,Outfrontgirl, 07:05 PM, 06-28-01
• RE: Lisapooh's Cornertime with Kismet,SherpaDave, 07:04 PM, 06-29-01

Awesome guys! You pulled that off so quickly. (I'm starting to wonder if Kismet is only interviewing Texans)

Survivorchick

Should I imply from this post that a certain woman from the Pacific Northwest would like to be the third interviewee?

Since I'm a Blowsvivor contestant, I will be one of the last to be interviewed (too much attention whoring can go to ones head). I was just noticing a little Texasbias that's all.

Survivorchick

OMG girls!!!!
You both ROCK!!!!!
This is awesome!
Amazingly funny!!!!!!

But Kismet, If you are gonna use me in every episode I want a cut of the profits.

EBug

** OW George!!! Stop it! OWW!!! **

OMG Kis! ROTFLMAO! Double jointed hips! You swore you wouldn't tell!! This was a great interview! By the way, when will the bandages come off of Buggy...?

"And I would do almost anything for a sig pic" Hey, all you have to do is ask. Haven't you noticed that I don't have a real job and I just sit around doing graphics and songs all day? My only payment would be just knowing your sig pic gives you a warm and fuzzy feeling. Oh yeah; letting me watch the next time you have one of your girlfriends over wouldn't hurt, either. Great interview, guys.

Awwwww Pooh! I can't believe no one welcomed you (damn, buggy! that's supposed to be YOUR job!! Way to GO!) Honestly, I just thought you've been sitting on that barstool forever--I had no idea you were a replacement trollop.

But. . . "shy" hardly begins to describe you, m'dear. . . your mouth is as wicked as any of BA's women, so don't think you're going to fool anyone with that "shy" story. . .

Must I provide proof? Who exactly was behind the deal tonight when whine-o was forced to perform a bump & grind routine whilst mixing margaritas for one and all? And who exactly was it who had him running from the room like a little girl at the first opportunity to make a run for it? YOU, I believe! He may never stop crying, and it'll be your fault! (If only you hadn't made a point of expounding on his. . . temporary deficiencies. . .)

Shy? I think not. (and this is only ONE of many examples, mind you!) Ladies and gentlemen, the prosecution rests.

GT

>Shy? I think not. (and this
>is only ONE of many
>examples, mind you!) Ladies and
>gentlemen, the prosecution rests.

I second that one, GT! Shy my ass!!! Lisapooh is one of the nastiest, and funniest, mouths in the bar! And did I mention how much we love her?? Oh, we do!!!

In a nice way, of course!

Great job Kis and Lisapooh!! I have a girl crush on you too!! You had me cracking up tonight in the bar.. You AND Buggy!! LMAO!! What a mouth!! *wink*

Great pic Ice Cat... you are amazing.

---------------------------------
"Let's spend the night together,
You'll wake up and live forever."
-Jamiroquai
---------------------------------
Du ar min hjälte, Supermänniska

Boom and Ice - You guys are enough to make me switch teams!!!!!

Thank you both so much. All I have to do now is figure out how to use them!!

You two are the BEST!

Pooh loves ya, baby!

LAST EDITED ON 06-28-01 AT 10:51 AM (EST)

Thanks, Lisapooh. These are both a little large for everyday use(when S3 comes on board), but I'm sure we can make smaller versions (though not quite as detailed) if you'd like. If you want to permanently add a picture to your post every time, you can go to the bottom of the page and select "off-topic conferences." Then click on "user," and then "modify your profile and set forum options."
Paste the URL of your picture into the signature box and submit it. Each time your posts come up the picture should load with it. All the pics you see on the board have already been uploaded to the SB server, so if you want one of those, right-click on the picture, then left-click on properties. You should then see the URL of the photo which you can copy and paste into your signature. If you want a picture to come up as a one-time deal, just paste the URL of an uploaded picture into the body of your post. I know it looks a little hard on paper, but once you do it, it's not that bad. If I've made a mistake in my directions, someone please correct me.

Oh Kis....you're too much! You got that interview out faster than a speeding bullet. Hmmmm....is Kismet also super...nah!

Anyway, great show, thanks to both you and Lisapooh for a wonderful read.
Um...Kis, if that interviewing Texas first thing is true, when are you making your way to Austin? *wink* *nudge*

I've got 3 nights in a row with Mr.Fleas out of town starting tonight, so I'm coming in and wanting to see some of the famed LisaPooh exploits! I would have given anything to see Rhino bumping and grinding out the margaritas.

mistofleas

Pooh Bookend of mine!!!! Excellent interview - Kis, I love these "one on ones"!

>and I wear red half shirts and shack up with a minor named Christopher.
***BUAAAHAHHAAA!!!! I didn't know Christopher Robin was your Cabana Boy!!!

>Is it true that you have a secret 'Lisa' society? Can you tell us about it?
>It's more of a sisterhood actually which is why I didn't
mention my bookends on the other questions. I can't tell
you everything but I can tell you that we've formed a girl group, "The Blow Sisters" I think we have a lot of potential.
*** Absolutely! We don't just sing, boys!!!! We're oh so much more!

>Currently we are working on covers of old Lisa Lisa songs
***....that LisaLisa herself taught us at the vacuum cleaner store she now works at in NJ....

>and maybe a Sweeney Sister medley. We're still working on the choreography. Itz doesn't have hands so the gestures are kind of lost on her.
*** Yeah, but somehow, I still manage! I've watched all my episodes, and I don't know how I do it - but it does keep me from picking my nose, so that's a plus! And unless the choreography involves doing that "Batusi" eye-mask thing with the fingers, I should still be able to manage! (*runs off to find sequined gowns for all three Lisa's so we can dress rehearse....*)

>One of my favorite quotes is "Leap and the net will appear"
*** Ooooh, Bookend, that IS a great quote! (*files quote into her Mind Files*)

Excellent interview, ladies!

****************************************

Pooh, how lovely to get a proper introduction to your talents and personality. Up til now you were just the girl I met in the bar last night with a running line of funny funny disses on Ebug. Not that Buggy doesn't have a mean backhand on her return.

I am thrilled to have a mention in the list of crushees.
Look forward to chatting more and wishing you best of luck on the publishing. I'm one of the ones who's scared to write because then you have to go through all that rejection, so you go and show us the way! Love the net quote and will keep it.

Okay... I've been wanting to ask when we were gonna see more Pooh shorts for a while now, and keep forgetting to mention it. But here she is, talking about how she's always wanted to be a writer. Which suggests to me she's got more material she ain't sharing.

So come on, Pooh! Share! Share! More stories from Pooh!