I think this is dying down, but I wanted to respond to this:>>> Some things are better handled by PMs to the parties concerned, unpleasant as that may become.
My feeling is that both PM and email are private areas where you should not go to confront someone. I enable those functions so as to meet people, exchange OT info and remarks, and exchange positive thoughts. If I started getting negative PM's, I would have to disable all that. Corvis and I worked out our differences, including our different take on using PMs, so this is not directed at anyone specific.
Trying to sort things out by PM may feel like you're just pulling someone over at a party to talk to them alone, but when you send a criticism, reproach, or challenge, you are sending something negative at a person who is working or at home, whatever, you don't know. Maybe someone is sick, or dying, or getting fired, or in the middle of a fight -- and you are walking into that and making an issue about message board dynamics, but possibly saying things that make the person feel really sad or mad.
It's not OK to do that. The other main board that I post on, Tripadvisor, forbids any use of PMs to harass a user, and violation is subject to banning. That seems a good policy to me. Now if someone asks you to PM them and you choose to do it, that's different. I'm talking about firing one off because you're disgruntled.
I know that dabo means well, but honestly, none of us should be suggesting that other people's private communications are fair game for hostilities to play out.