Well, now is the moment you have all been waiting for. The list of most kissable men on the Joe Schmo Show will finally be revealed. Below you will find a list of the male characters on The Joe Schmo Show, ordered from least kissable to most kissable. And if you think you know the answers... you're dead wrong.
But before we begin, let's recap...
Show the scene of Kip getting mad about the pictures Hutch took.
Show the scene of Matt getting slathered in Honey with Molly.
Show the scene of Brian jumping around naked.
Show the scene of Ralph kissing Molly.
Show the scene of Hutch breaking his plate and storming out of the Lap of Luxury Mansion.
Go to commercial. The Bacardi and Cola commercial. A Joe Schmo commercial. One of the I am not Michael Jordan commercial. Show the SpikeTV spray painted thing...
And, we're back. The votes are in... and the list of most kissable men on the Joe Schmo Show is as follows.
#6 Earl... a little to old and grizzled for me. military fantasies, aside... if his dentures came out during our make out session, i would be scarred for life.
#5 Brian... nice guy, but... kinda greasy. the nut knuckle, while hilarious, was also disgusting. thus, he loses kissability points, but gains funny points. they aren't always directly proportional, but in this instance, they are.
#4 Ralph... he played smarmy, and though i'm sure he's very nice, i heard that thing about how he tried to break the record for numbers of times masturbated in a single day on the radio. that's just gross. certainly not as gross as earl or brian, but, still... gross.
#3 Hutch... i hate facial hair. i saw him without the facial hair. he should keep the facial hair. but, his real person personality seemed cool. (cool = said some nice things about matt, my hero) so he gets some bonus points.
#2 Matt... The man with the big heart. Its been my experience that men who are sweet, taste sweet. But, in the end, I'm shallow. Sorry Matt. You're only at #2
and the winner of the most kissable male award goes to...
#1 Kip... I liked the actor's personality, and he was a cutie. His straight voice was to die for. He also was very funny as an actor. He had the nicest body, which isn't saying much for this group of studs. (Do you think Spike didn't pick any guy with a supermodel body to make its audience feel better? C'mon...every reality show has a guy with muscles...) Besides, the way his real person personality seemed, I bet he was fun to kiss, if not more...
And on that note... I'm out.