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kingfish 20573 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold" 05-01-19, 10:23 PM (EST) "Be The Survivor" S38, Ep12 : Extinction Island Soaps"" Welcome to BTS Week 12. Unfortunately, your usual host, the inimitable EPMB (aka Executive Producer Mark Burnett, AKA Evil Prick Mark Burnett, aka around the office as DDB - Doctor Death Breath) is unavailable this week. He claims that he’s on a holy pilgrimage to Mecca, but the rumor (and no, I didn’t just invent this. Why would I do that? Heh heh) is that he’s being treated for acute genital herpes contracted when bopping his pet Iguana, Ignacio. Nacho. I also deny that we gave him the very comely and enticing Nacho that we purposefully infected with the potentially wang disfiguring disease for his going away party, or that I knew of his special fondness for comely and enticing Iguanas. I just thought that he was one of the boys, and well, boys will be boys. Anyway, he’s AWOL, For whatever reason. So, here’s this week’s BTS intro: Survivor Soap Ahem. I’m a little nervous speaking in front of large crowds like this, so bear with me. In the spirit of all good soap operas, first we need to catch you up to speed: Remember the Tates? Jessica and her husband Chester? Chester's the guy who fools around with everyone but his wife. And poor Jessica, because Chester's been so busy, has taken up with Peter the tennis pro, who in turn has been busy with Jessica's daughter Corrine. Of course, Jessica doesn't know Peter's been busy with Corrine, and Chester's been busy with everyone but her. Jessica just wishes she had gone shopping instead. Remember the Campbells? Jessica's sister Mary and her second husband Burt? The Campbells have problems. Mary has two problems; her son Danny is in the Mob. Her son Jodie is gay. Danny and Burt have a problem. They don't get along. Jodie and Burt have a problem, they don't get along either. Mary and Burt have a problem, Burt can't make love to Mary and she doesn't know why. Burt has the biggest problem of all, he knows why. He murdered her first husband. We begin this week's episode of Survivor Soap shortly after Jessica's tennis lesson. Mary: Jodie?! What in the world are you doing? Jodie: Ma... Mary: Look at you! My wig, my necklace, my best dress-- Oh! You wear that belted! Jodie: Yes. Mary: I never thought of wearing it belted. It looks much better that way. Jodie: Sure. It breaks up the straight line here, and then it just blouses slightly at the waist. Mary: Well, that's much more slimming. Jodie: Definitely. Mary: Jodie, get out of my clothes. Jodie: Mother! Sit down. Mary: Jodie! Come on! Jodie: Mother, how would you like a daughter? Mary: What are you talking about? Jodie: Sit down, Mom. Mary: Jodie, just tell me. Jodie: I'm thinking of having a sex-change operation. Mary: A sex-change operation. A sex-change operation. Jodie: Right. Mary: I better sit down. Now that we’re all caught up…Roll tape. This week we ask the big question, will Aurora search Davin’s sack? Will Devin let her? Will she be gentle? Will Devin fall for the old fake idol ploy? Will Warthog fall off the endurance challenge first, from Extinction Island? (Come on, we all know that if it’s possible, be certainly will). Will Jeff’s dimples hold rainwater? We’re all about to find out on this week’s episode of Survivor, Extinction Island. Be The Survivor Mail Clerk Someone please fix the copier   Alert Edit | Reply | Reply With Quote | Top

Subject     Author     Message Date     ID    Gunfire, RPGs, Insurrection kingfish 05-05-19 1    RE: Gunfire, RPGs, Insurrection michel2 05-05-19 2        RE: Gunfire, RPGs, Insurrection kingfish 05-06-19 3            RE: Gunfire, RPGs, Insurrection michel2 05-06-19 4                RE: Gunfire, RPGs, Insurrection kingfish 05-08-19 5    RE: Gunfire, RPGs, Insurrection Aruba 05-08-19 6

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kingfish 20573 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold" 05-05-19, 02:08 PM (EST) 1. "Gunfire, RPGs, Insurrection" Big Barry (as my friends call me) here bringing you this week’s superb and super sensational spoilers that the rest of the spoiler world only wishes they had. But they don’t. Because I’ve got them. And soon you will too, because you are smarter than they are and know where to look. Here. Also you know the secret hand shake. If you don’t know the hand shake, security will have to escort you off this page, nothing personal, but after the recent infiltration by Russian hackers, we have to be careful. We also have a surprise for you this week; some disturbing and penetrating questions will be posed. I advise you to pay close attention to them, they may be life changing. Security, are we clear? Good. Now on with the show. Which is the Buzzard Island Barry Spoiler show featuring me, Buzzard Island Survivor Spoiler Barry. Brought to you by the Fijian EPA with a message to everyone on Fiji and on Survivor to please stop the desecration of their beaches, and plug up the pollution outlet in the butt of the main polluter, Dave, with a coconut. Even better, use two. Their mottos are; “ Water Pollution ain’t cool so don’t be a fool” and “Please Salute, Don’t Pollute.” It doesn’t make sense, but it rhymes, and, well, I guess that is something. I must also mention one more; “Drown that SOB Dave”, simply because there a growing crowd outside chanting that one right now. It has become a very popular chant lately. On everybody’s lips. The Fiji EPA warns that a certain Aruba Extradition Squad has been contracted to perform a special rendition on a certain Canadian for breaking their laws against demeaning their warning signs. Since the Local Aruban EPA enacted similar laws protecting the reputation of their own signage they were very incensed by this lawbreaker and have issued orders to kill at the slighted sign of resistance, like if he opens his big fat mouth again. If I seem to be on edge it’s because I woke up Sunday morning to gunfire, jet fighters, howitzers firing, and men screaming at each other. False alarm though, it was just the Sunday morning talking heads. But still, I crapped my pants and headed for the secret underground shelter hidden under my palm tree. I have an emergency case of scotch down there and managed to make it to Wednesday morning before I ran out. Of scotch, then the shelter. BTW, the secret underground shelter is a secret, so mum’s the word on that. Pinky swear! We should note that no talking heads were injured that morning. Feelings were hurt, but there was no physical damage done. OK, now, this week as usual I will present the All-World Super Spoilers you’ve come to expect, and that some of you can’t live without. Mixed in, and in keeping with our esteemed substitute presenter the Survivor Island Mail Clerk’s excellent idea to liken the island doings to a soap opera, I will pose a few Super Buzzard Island Survivor Questions, just to see who’s awake Question/Spoiler #1: As Warthog gets off the boat, he is astonished to see the previously ousted survivors feeding off Mama Reem’s teats while she sings and coos to them to sleep, like the little puppies they are. Damn he thinks, why didn’t I think of that? Well, I am kinda thirsty…Mama! Question/Spoiler #2: Will Mama Reem welcome Warthog to suckle at her teat? Or will Warthog be the nestling that falls out of the nest? Question//Spoiler #3: Will Warthog fall off the boat on the way to Extinction Island? Question//Spoiler #4: How many times will Warthog fall out of something? Question/Spoiler #5: Warthog will continue his unbroken string of pissing off everyone after arriving on new home, Extinction Island. This non-threatening but excessively vocal and self-important blowhard is now the (pardon me for giggling, but this is just so funny) “biggest threat on Extinction Island”. He will attempt to direct the boat driver to the wrong island and later claim that it was just a “Strategic” move. Question//Spoiler #6: Will Victoria finally bite Rikki? (this one is limited to those readers that enjoy classic authors and their stories. Others will just have to have it explained to them). Question//Spoiler #7: Will Aurora dig deep to find the meaning in life, or Rick’s bag, whichever is handy? Question//Spoiler #8: Will Ron once again proclaim that he is the biggest mover on the island? Question//Spoiler #9: And will that result in him moving off the island? Question//Spoiler #10: Is everyone a liar, or are liars just everyone? Question//Spoiler #11 Will the remaining Survivors shed uncontrollable tears during visits from home? Question//Spoiler #12: Will Pippi’s freckles finally merge into one giant freckle? Another reference to classic literature, which will be beyond outside the interests of some readers. Question//Spoiler #13: Freckle… freckle… what a funny word, Freckle. Buzzard Island Basher Barry, OUT! Buzzard Island Basher Barry Danger zone below when windy   Remove | Alert Edit | Reply | Reply With Quote | Top

michel2 3369 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity" 05-05-19, 04:53 PM (EST) 2. "RE: Gunfire, RPGs, Insurrection" I won't apologize for opening my trap once more because this post seems mostly addressed to me. I should ignore your rubbish but I think I'll enjoy rubbing your nose in the polluted beaches. Anyway, read your own constitution and its amendments before trying to shut me up. By the way, do they really call you "BIG" Barry? I guess that means you're fat! For your questions 1 and 2, all I'll say is ewwww! It takes a sick man to bring up Reem's teats. Then for questions 3, 4 and 5, the answer is we don't know because production didn't even bother traveling to the Edge of Extinction. I'll add that your fixation on War Dog is weird. Not as weird as your fixation on Reem's chest but close... Question 6: Kipling again? Here's a medal. David dropped it in the ocean. Question 7: The meaning of life isn't handy so we know she settled for Rick's bag. This is another example that the saying is wrong: There are stupid questions... Questions 8 + 9 + 10 + 11: Did you watch the episode? Questions 12 + 13: Victoria is cute and not a bad player after all.   Remove | Alert Edit | Reply | Reply With Quote | Top

kingfish 20573 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold" 05-06-19, 11:31 AM (EST) 3. "RE: Gunfire, RPGs, Insurrection" You do set yourself up nicely. Refusing to acknowledge Warthog's inabilities, steadfastly defending your not having read some of the world's acclaimed authors, and your repeatedly resorting to school yard taunts such as calling those with whom you disagree "fat". Your particular animus toward "fat" people first arose when you refused to acknowledge the superior play of Lauren because she was "fat", and you just couldn't believe that a "fat" person could be a great competitor. Adding to that the accusation that I was "in Love" with her, which must have come from some complicated place in your psyche. You say you don't apologize, and I agree, that has become your mantra. Never apologize, and when someone disagrees, attack with tactics you learned in grade school. Very much from the playbook of our present (USA) disgraceful leader. Buzzard Island Basher Barry Danger zone below when windy   Remove | Alert Edit | Reply | Reply With Quote | Top

michel2 3369 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity" 05-06-19, 08:16 PM (EST) 4. "RE: Gunfire, RPGs, Insurrection" What a bunch of crap! First, I've always said that War Dog was terrible in challenges. I did, however, mention that being bad in challenges isn't necessarily a bad thing since it doesn't paint a target on your back. In the first few weeks I was hoping it was his strategy but then realized he just sucked. His game play however wasn't bad at all until he overreached and went for Kelley who was serving as a perfect shield and a vote in his pocket. I have no problem saying he made a huge mistake there. You then wrote: "...steadfastly defending your not having read some of the world's acclaimed authors..." Wow! I haven't read Kipling which is ONE author but I have read many classics. Like I said, in my childhood, my classic authors were French, namely Jules Verne, Alexandre Dumas, de la Fontaine and, my personal favorite Henri Vernes. Have you read those?!! Then, this gem: "...you refused to acknowledge the superior play of Lauren because she was "fat", and you just couldn't believe that a "fat" person could be a great competitor..." You called yourself BIG Barry so I thought I'd get another rise from you by calling you fat and boy! was I right! As for lauren, I'd suggest you go read that thread again because I NEVER wrote that a fat person couldn't be a great competitor. First of all, I consider Cirie one of the best ever and she was well, fat. Chris, the leader of the Flab Five is also a favorite of mine. What started this whole battle of words was a post I wrote saying that Lauren had very little to do with the vote that led to Patrick's elimination. Despite what she said at TC, I was sure, and still am, that it had been decided well before they even got to TC. That's when you replied saying: "It's no big thing but..." I found it funny that you would address a post concerning Lauren using those words so I replied "Lauren is a big thing" and then you completely lost it, going on and on, and you're still going actually, about how lauren wasn't fat and how I was stupid to call her fat. Hilarious man! As for my refusal to be bad-mouthed or even bullied, I assure you that it comes more from replying to posts like this either here or at Survivor Sucks and not from grade school. The internet is a bad place to have soft skin. The best advice I have for you did come from a Grade Schooler on a one-time reality show: "Deal with it!"   Remove | Alert Edit | Reply | Reply With Quote | Top

kingfish 20573 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold" 05-08-19, 01:21 PM (EST) 5. "RE: Gunfire, RPGs, Insurrection" The preface to your post was apt.   Remove | Alert Edit | Reply | Reply With Quote | Top

Aruba 3121 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity" 05-08-19, 07:41 PM (EST) 6. "RE: Gunfire, RPGs, Insurrection" GEEZ...what a week to take a hiatus! Too bad I missed out on all the action in this thread. Big Barry...STELLAR POST!!! I promise to incorporate some of your appropriate observations in my ranking after tonight's episode. I'll be less of a stranger this week.   Remove | Alert Edit | Reply | Reply With Quote | Top

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