Eight Little Coneheads Jumping on the Bed...and how did these doughnut crumbs get in the bed, anyway?Any resemblance to the actual show is purely coincidental. No animals were harmed in the writing of this summary unless you count the cow who provided me with my cheeseburger.
These contestants seem to have no hold on reality, so they must be aliens from that far-away planet called Remulak France.
Last episode, MalConehead lost his precious mirror and with it, his perspective, as Reynold the Foil-wrapped Conehead would not share his own mirror. So now MalConehead has journeyed to the Ponderosa where he can commiserate with the Pine Coneheads.
For future reference, here is this week's cast:
Erik the Ice Cream Conehead
Reynold the Foil-Wrapped Conehead
Sherri the Sili-Conehead
Cochran the Coney Dog Head
Eddie-ot the Empty Conehead
Dawn the Waffle Conehead
Brenda the Pointy Little Conehead
Andrea the Blindsided-by-the-Light Conehead
TREE MAIL!!! All the little Coneheads scramble to see what they get to do for a reward today. Uh-oh! No reward? Immunity already? They'll be butting coneheads over this one. Foil-wrapped Conehead detects a signal...he astoundingly figures out that if he doesn't win immunity, he is the next one out. Ice Cream Conehead and Eddie-ot the Empty Conehead just want some grub, man. They forgot this wasn't a reward challenge. Quick, somebody tell them they didn't win!
As they arrive at the challenge, Jiffy is blinded by the reflection of Coney Dog Head's shirtless torso in Foil-Wrapped Conehead's foil-wrapped head. In all fairness, I must admit that Coney looks like he needs to pack on a few hot dogs. The Coneheads are instructed to balance on their perches and gradually they will move up until everyone but the winner is out. After the challenge begins, Jiffy holds out a plate of FRESH doughnuts (what are we supposed to think he would give them, moldy ones out of the dumpster?) and milk to tempt the Pointy Ones. As you may know, Coneheads tend to consume things in great quantities, so of course, some of them choose to feed their faces rather than try for a million bucks. So they have fun with their little version of "Follow the Leader". I wonder what the weather is like at the top of those cones. So all of the Coneheads line up on their little perches as Jiffy hands the two small girls a nice coating of superglue for their feet. And of course, the winner will be doubly blessed with a clue to the hidden immunity idol, which is easy to find unless you are MalConehead and are scared away by a little girl.
Eight little Coneheads balance on a board,
Two jump off in one accord.
Throw away immunity for a small reward,
Six little coneheads balance on a board.
Six little Coneheads balance on a board,
One jumped off to feed his gourd.
Doesn't need immunity, just wants a reward,
Five little Coneheads balance on a board.
Five little Coneheads balance on a board,
One fell off and said a bad word.
Now will she scream and cry when she's back on shore?
Four little Coneheads balance on a board.
Four little Coneheads balance on a board,
One fell off as she shook, then soared.
Of course she thinks she's safe because she's so adored.
Three little Coneheads balance on a board.
Three little Coneheads balance on a board,
One fell off after trying so hard.
Losing this immunity is one he can't afford.
Two little Coneheads balance on a board.
Two little Coneheads balance on a board,
"Friends" too scared to give the other the award.
One fell off after they got bored.
No little Coneheads balance on a board.
So Blindsided-by-the-Light Conehead wins immunity! And a clue! Pointy Little Conehead made her promise to share the clue, so she does as she shares it with ALL the Favorite Coneheads. Ice Cream Conehead digs because Light Conehead orders him to, and his frozen brain dumbly does her bidding. He doesn't want the curse of having the hidden immunity idol, so he gleefully hands it over to Light. He does have a sense of deja vu. He passes it off as high blood sugar.
So our gleeful little Light now has two immunity tokens! Oh, boy, she can't wait to Blindside somebody! That would make her the Superior Leader of the Coneheads. But she decides that getting Foil out will have to do for now. He has been interfering with her tv reception. Meanwhile, Waffle Conehead decides that her conehead is her enemy. She has not yet initiated voting herself out, but just wait.
The Coneheads sharpen their cones to go to Tribal Conecil, and admit that they sometimes actually lie. Jiffy faints from shock, and Coney Head revives him with the sniff of a hot dog. When the votes come in, Reynold the Foil-Wrapped Conehead receives a radio signal from back in the eighties, grabs Sili-Conehead, and begins dirty dancing to "Time of My Life". Unfortunately, he rips his pants on her cone and runs to the Ponderosa to borrow Philli-Conehead's pink underwear. Philli-Conehead isn't exactly thrilled Foil is there because there is a blinding reflection on the Spy-Cam that came with his Nancy Drew Detective Kit. MalConehead is happy because he can use Foil's head for a mirror.
Blindsided-by-the-Light Conehead decides it is time to make a BM. Coney Dog Head thinks the BM she wants to make stinks. So Coney, Pointy, and the others decide to make their own BM. Hopefully, she will not smell it coming.
Time for another Immunity Challenge! I wonder if they have these in France. The Coneheads must do contortions with a buoy and a rope, get a key, unlock a box and get out ladder rungs, and build a Stairway to Heaven. Ice Cream has finally found his calling, as he deftly uses his wasting-away body to take the lead. Sili-Cone is bringing up the rear, as her girls keep whacking her in the face. Ice Cream Conehead actually wins and gets an Immunity Necklace! Light jumps up and down with glee, certain he will grace her with the necklace before Tribal Council. But alas, he does not. He has a momentary flash of coherence and keeps the necklace for himself, as he thinks the beads are cool.
Light decides it really is time to blindside someone. So she orchestrates her own blindside and doesn't even catch herself doing it. She decides Pointy is too good at challenges and Waffle...well, who knows what she is going to do. So she tells Coney she wants to get rid of them because she thinks she surely could win against Eddie-ot. Coney tells the others and they decide Light is too scary...just ask MalCone. So they plan the ultimate blindside and polish their cones for another Tribal Conecil. Ice Cream muses that he is in control of the game (Lord, help us all!) as he fondly strokes his necklace.
The Coneheads discuss how little they trust each other as Light threatens to use her idol. So she chooses to trust them all and decides she has always wanted a Caramoan souvenir. They cost so much in the Survivor Gift Shoppe. Little Miss Light is shocked when she is voted out. She loves Blindsiding so much she is even in awe of her own demise. She trots off to the Ponderosa because she has heard that Philli-Conehead is short on women's underwear. She also enjoys gazing at MalCone and Foil. Eddie-ot the love of her life is discarded like yesterday's toast. If you can't beat 'em, leave 'em.
So tune in next Wednesday to see Waffle Cone waffle and decide she should be the next one out because she gets in her own way, Eddie-ot act empty-headed, and Ice Cream Cone wither away into that fun place in his Conehead after his doughnuts wear off and he starves to death. After all, he is from France.
AF 2006
Okay, here it goes...I must push Post Message, I must push Post Message...
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I wondered how you would deal with the hubris overload, good job.