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PLEASE NOTE: The Reality TV World Message Boards are filled with desperate
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but intolerance for other viewpoints is NOT welcome and respect for other
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"Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread."
Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 06:51 PM (EST)
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"Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Because the Big Brother people really needed someplace to go.
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 07:04 PM (EST)
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1. "CPS For Beginners." |
Hi! Welcome to the first-ever CPS update thread, all none of you! Now in case you're new to the game, we're going to be following a table of Texas Hold-'Em tonight, and if you don't know how to play, the helpful people at Bravo will shortly be presenting the same two short films they present every (censored) week. Oh, and you're supposed to be watching Bravo right now. Brah-vo. It's somewhere on your cable/dish system. Maybe.Tonight's table consists of Kathy Najimy, Caroline Rhea, Sharon Lawrence, Kathryn Morris, and Ricki Lake. We are all rooting against Caroline. Caroline combines in one person the world's worst loser and the world's worst winner. We want Caroline to go down in flames. Caroline has proven herself uncommonly lucky in blackjack, and we can only hope it doesn't translate over. We can root for Anyone Else. The really tall guy is Phil Gordon. Phil knows a lot about poker. He can quote you the odds of winning on any hand just by looking at the cards on the table, in real time. The fairly short guy is Dave Foley. Dave knows absolutely nothing about poker, but he does a really good job at voicing ants. They are your hosts. They are both more funnier and more capable than the ChenBot. They may secretly be lovers. Nobody's sure, but nobody would mind very much if they were, excepting all the people who have crushes on Phil. Dave will make fun of the people at the table. Phil will make fun of the poker play at the table. They work very well together, and there's usually a lot to make fun of. They've been together since Season Two. Phil was around in Season One, but Dave wasn't. We don't talk about Season One. Dave and Phil sit in the Losers Lounge. This is not to say Dave and Phil are losers. They're barely DAWs. No one wants to sit in the Losers Lounge with Phil and Dave, but anyone can get in just by dumping all their chips to another player, usually not on purpose. There are nice drinks in the Lounge. Nice drinks help you forget about having lost all your chips. All the people at the table are playing for charity. Isn't that nice? The charity of their choice will get five thousand dollars just because they showed up. The person who has all the chips at the end will go to the final table, where the winner will get $100,000 for their charity. The money has a corporate sponsor. Dave will mention that sponsor's name no more than eighty-five times tonight. Phil will not mention the name at all. It's not his job. This is the third game of five in the first round. The winners of the previous tables were Stephen Collins and Andrew Firestone. Which people at the table tonight would Andrew like to give a rose to? You will shortly be hearing the words 'Shuffle up and deal.' They mean very little, but Phil and Dave love it when they're said. Stay tuned...
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 07:20 PM (EST)
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3. "RE: CPS For Beginners." |
Estee summed it up really well, and a few additions.Phil is a professional poker player with a World Poker Tour (at this point, the largest non-online/non-World Series prize pools in the world to my knowledge) title and another final table. He is very good with the odds, and if he says something, he's right. No need to question him. When he says that the player shouldn't have called with second pair, he's right, even if Jonny Fairplay won. Phil and Dave work better together than (censored for non Tournament 1 watchers). I think Dave is playing dumb about not knowing about poker (he got 7th in the WPT Invitational two seasons ago), but it's a lot more fun to think he doesn't know. They also both have dolls that have two cameos, one in an episode with Chris Kattan (well, just be glad you didn't see that episode) and one with the final game of that tournament. Also, for my money, the Loser's Lounge is completely superior to actually playing. You can make fun of them on the tv, you get drinks from the waitress that is back there (although tonight, I expect a waiter in a skimpy outfit). Yeah, Shuffle Up and Deal, then pray that Caroline gets A-K and anyone else gets A-A, and Caroline goes all-in and loses. I saw her once on Celebrity Blackjack. That was enough.
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 07:28 PM (EST)
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4. "RE: CPS For Beginners." |
I saw Caroline four times on CB. (And yet, I still want GSN to make a third season.) Her original table in the first season, the final table where she (censored) won, her return table for Second Two -- Caroline vs. Baldwins, where she won again, and the semi-final table where she finally, finally went home. My throat was sore from cheering for days, and it was totally worth it.There will be waiters in skimpy outfits. I saw one during the preview commercial.
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kathliam 3669 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Thong Contest Judge"
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09-01-05, 07:30 PM (EST)
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6. "RE: CPS For Beginners." |
Fisher! I haven't seen you for ages, but then again I've been stuck in the vortex otherwise known as 'BB6'. I will join you guys for the second hour, mkay?
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 07:45 PM (EST)
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7. "RE: CPS For Beginners." |
Yay! We have three people! Eventually!Ever since CPS started up, I've basically been starting the Thursday ECST and immediately heading to Bravo, with occasional flips back during commercial. The hamsters have turned so detestable, I didn't think I was actually missing anything watchable.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 07:13 PM (EST)
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2. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Huge week for Phil Gordon. He had a great 15 minutes on ESPN where he got out his charity plug (RoShamBo contest for a seat in the WSoP Main Event), he did everything right in his short play (even raised being first into the pot), now he gets a week where he can't just pick the woman.Anyway, we here at the CPS followers (right, all three of us here, or four, I dunno) welcome all you people appalled with BB for whatever reason. Tonight has no good potential. Either someone I don't know offhand (Sharon Lawrence, never watched DH, or Kathryn Morris, didn't watch Cold Case), Kathy Najimy, Ricki Lake, and Estee's favorite, Caroline Rhea. Considering this season, our only female choices were Trashelle and OmaSnape (Her reclamation process is putting some doubt on Harry's pure evil theory, rather she may have some good in her...or she was on shows with Janice Dickinson, Jonny Fairplay, and Johnathan Baker, whatever), it doesn't get bearable until Week 4 where Amber Tamblyn is playing. Then in Week 5 we get Penny Marshall, but this show doesn't exactly have a good track record for actresses in less-recent shows. My pick? Sharon Lawrence, since the last two winners both held the third slot on the Bravo Contestants Charts and I didn't know them. As for viewer predictions, Kathy Najimy is the favorite with 26% and Caroline Rhea has 24%
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 07:30 PM (EST)
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5. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Come on -- we both know Phil only makes his picks as a means of constructive flirting. Opening music in a few minutes. Did I mention I hate this new announcer? The music combined with the old announcer made the names being announced actually sound halfway dramatic. This guy is a snoozefest.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 07:49 PM (EST)
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8. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
So, I'm not the only one who wants the old announcer back?It's starting, joy
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 07:50 PM (EST)
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9. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
We have cheap animation!Dave asks the magical question 'What's cheaper than another rerun of The West Wing?' You're watching it! Another Elizabeth Glazer Pediatric AIDS player -- CPS's most popular charity.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 07:51 PM (EST)
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10. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Kathryn Morris has taken the winner's seat, where Andrew Firestone and Stephen Collins sat. Ricki Lake took 2nd place seat where O-something and Bryan Cranston played.Beck Premier Light Count: 1
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 07:53 PM (EST)
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11. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
And now, a short film by Tim Burton.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 07:55 PM (EST)
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12. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
I should note, that when Phyllis Gordon (who we just learned, dressed in drag once and entered a women's only tournament) and Dave Foley pick people, they almost alwyas go out first and second.Phil Gordon picked Ricki Lake Dave Foley picked Caroline Rhea, and he announces she's never played the game.
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 08:00 PM (EST)
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15. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Thank you, Dave Foley. The kiss of death is in place and scarring its way into Caroline's skin.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 09:06 PM (EST)
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38. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Well, Phil Gordon's pick just went out
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 07:56 PM (EST)
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13. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Caroline is a mortal lock, which in CPS terms, means that A-A loses to 6-4.She also made the "fold to a check" play. Mortal lock.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 08:00 PM (EST)
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14. "CPS Theory #42" |
When Phil Gordon, after the flop, turn, or river, says that "<Player> need to make a bet his/her opponent can call", they will invariably make a bet that's way too big (usually all-in), then Phil will say what he would bet.
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 08:02 PM (EST)
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16. "Celebrity Blackjack flashback." |
Ricki Lake with three 2s on the table. Thank gawd Jason wasn't there to talk her into splitting them.
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 08:06 PM (EST)
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17. "Warning:" |
We're two hands in and Caroline is already annoying.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 08:10 PM (EST)
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18. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Jonny Fairplay has inhabited Kathryn's body, she just called 2,000, and called a 5,000 all-in with second pair with a horrible kicker (Sharon had top two pair, A-Q to Kathryn's Queens).Overplaying second pair, and yes, interesting is Phil's synonym for bad.
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kathliam 3669 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Thong Contest Judge"
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09-01-05, 08:12 PM (EST)
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19. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
BB's on commercial break and I'm just stopping by to say 'hi' and I'll see you all soon.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 08:18 PM (EST)
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20. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Well, boring so far. Next week looks better, with some mad Trebekian Smackdown.
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 08:19 PM (EST)
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22. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Have hope. There's still room for someone to do something heroically stupid. They can't all be Brad vs. Sarah.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 08:25 PM (EST)
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23. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Does folding pocket Jacks with four undercards on the board to a 500 dollar bet (in a 2900 pot with a player all in qualify as just stupid, or heroically?
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 08:30 PM (EST)
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25. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Let's call it Sidekick Stupid. There were a lot of clubs --but I would have gone all-in there for the chance to get someone out, especially having as many chips as Sharon to work with.
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 08:18 PM (EST)
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21. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Caroline claims to have poopy hands. You said it, I didn't.Lots of calls at this table -- it's starting to feel like a return to Reality Week. At least we're seeing some pre-flop raises.
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 08:29 PM (EST)
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24. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Why did Sharon fold on pocket jacks? Over cards to the entire table -- sure, there were a lot of clubs out there, but for the chance to bust Kathryn out on the cheap, it was more than worth it. Did Ricki just mutter 'I can't call on second pair' as she folded just now? Hmmm...
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 08:32 PM (EST)
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26. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Well, Kathy's actually playing decently, and Phil somehow turned 1 four in a deck of 36 into 50:1 odds. Nice.
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 08:38 PM (EST)
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27. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
*sigh* The night we're trying to talk him up for people, and he blows one. Figures.Caroline says Kathryn has no idea how to play. Pot, kettle, Voldy. Kathy Must. Stop. Bluffing. No one believes a bet she makes right now.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 08:44 PM (EST)
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28. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
*snore* Nothing greatCaroline, yeah, annoying when she folds too.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 08:47 PM (EST)
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29. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
OK, we have an A-K, K-10, and a 7-8 (I think) of spadesWe get an Ace of Spades, a 4 of spades, and a 9 of diamonds. The A-K bets 1,000 into a 4800 pot, the spade draw olds, the K-10 stays in. Something's not right.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 08:50 PM (EST)
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30. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Way for Caroline to call a 2,000 bet with bottom pair of threes. Kathy actually followed the flush draw and caught it, Ricki called the all-in, and RL is in deep now.
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kathliam 3669 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Thong Contest Judge"
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09-01-05, 08:50 PM (EST)
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31. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Hi! I'm here! I'll catch up during the commercials. Did Kathy Najimi just flash the audience?
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 08:55 PM (EST)
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34. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Yep. She was so happy about actually winning a hand, she went Brandy on us.I cannot figure out what's going through Sharon's head. Weird calls, weird folds... and now Kathryn just laid down pocket threes pre-flop. With a pocket pair and no raises, you've gotta see the flop.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 08:59 PM (EST)
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35. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Especially when you are short stacked like Sharon was (or I think she was).
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kathliam 3669 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Thong Contest Judge"
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09-01-05, 08:53 PM (EST)
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32. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Sharon calls on a 9-7 off suit? Gutsy. She pulls a pair of 7s. Sharon pulls another pair out of the cards. (I'm still trying to learn the various terms.) Sharon goes all in with 2 pairs, Caroline folds.Funny ladies!!!
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 08:53 PM (EST)
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33. "God bless Robert Thompson" |
NiceCaroline: I'm going to bet 1,000, you can find out what that means Phil: That means she hasn't raised enough Robert: Caroline needs to put in 200 more to raise 600 to 1200 Caroline: You're mean, you must have not seen Sabrina Robert: What's Sabrina?
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kathliam 3669 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Thong Contest Judge"
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09-01-05, 09:02 PM (EST)
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36. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Kathy 4-5 off suit, folds. Kathryn 2-4, folds. Rikki folds. Caroline all in with 8-6. Shron Q-8 and calls. Flop is nothing. Caroline has a pair of 6s. River is a 9, Caroline pulls it out.New hand. Kathryn A-10, she's in. Rikki has pair of 4s, all in, and she stands. Caroline 10-9, folds. Sharon folds. Kathy 4-5, folds. Kathryn goes all in. Flop is J-7-5. Turn is a 6. Rikki has straight flush draw. River is an Ace, Kathryn gets a pair, Rikki left with $1,000
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 09:09 PM (EST)
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39. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
And to the pantheon of celebrity expressions, we now add the Ricki Lake 'Where the (censored) (censored) did that (censored) ace come from?!?' Classic bad-beat.
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kathliam 3669 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Thong Contest Judge"
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09-01-05, 09:06 PM (EST)
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37. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
This show almost moves too quickly to transcribe.Oooh, Kathy has an A-K. Rikki goes all in with 9-Q. Flop 10-4-5. Kathy, Ricki and Sharon in. Turn is a 7-Hearts. Kathy is still A-high nothing. River is a 5. Kathy wins with pair of 5s, wth an Ace high. Ricki Lake heading to the Losers Lounge. Is Tribe still the manager at the Loser Lodge? I worked there last fall.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 09:18 PM (EST)
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40. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Damn you Caroline Rhea, just burn to the LL.
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 09:22 PM (EST)
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41. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
I've been waiting an hour and a half to say 'Caroline, you are the biggest loser!', and it's not happening...
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kathliam 3669 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Thong Contest Judge"
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09-01-05, 09:27 PM (EST)
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42. "RE: Celebrity Poker Showdown #6 Episode #3 East Coast Spoiler Thread." |
Sharon pulls a straight out of the turn!!! Beats Caroline's 2 pair.
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Fishercat 4168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-01-05, 09:29 PM (EST)
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43. "Well, didn't see that coming" |
Carolina has A-6, Kathy A-10, Other Person J-10It comes A-Q-Q Caroline goes All-in, J-10 calls with an inside straight draw, Kathy folds best hand. And then a King on the turn to kick out Caroline.
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 09:31 PM (EST)
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44. "RE: Well, didn't see that coming" |
And then Phil and Dave take turns ripping her up one side and down the other.'The real tragedy is that you were almost the chip leader.' No kidding, Dave. Whew! And Phil is heavily medicated! Right now!
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Estee 57126 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-01-05, 09:52 PM (EST)
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45. "And CPS history is made." |
For the first time ever, I called a table right.
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p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e -
p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e -
p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e -
p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e -
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