Hello Racers and welcome to the Vally of Death!

*jarring chord*

Many of you were stupid this week, lucky for you the Festers were stupider. You guys from the easier seasons must be surprised at how the clues and puzzles are once again clues and puzzles and not just instructions on what to do next.

Rob and Amber, for crying out loud. *I* dance at the Pit Stop. Do not - I repeat - DO NOT continue to muscle in on my schtick. My job is totally secure and I resent the two of you constantly trying to outdo me. *checks Golf Equipment*

Oh, and you're team #1 again. Have some off-road motorcycles. Did Amber ever try out for the Price is Right? I know Bob is always looking for contestants who give REALLY BIG REACTIONS. Or maybe she just really loves motorcross?

Danny and Oswald: I'm not sure that being able to manipulate nuts By Hand means that you were a man in a previous life.

Joe and Bill: I only like the hot gay guys to hug me. Sorry, Bill, though I *am* impressed that you were the second person to figure out the Detour.

Eric and Danielle: I could probably make fun of Eric for not figuring out the clue at the Roadblock, but I'm just looking forward too much to next week's flounder-catching Roadblock. Hee.

Uchenna and Joyce: Well, I guess I *will* make fun of Joyce. You were nearly the first person into the boardroom and one of the last to figure it out. Good grief.

Dustin and Kandice: Mucho applause for Dustin for being the first to figure out how to complete the Roadblock. Too bad you couldn't hang on to your lead.

Teri and Ian: You were there. You did stuff. You finished. Meh.

Charla and Mirna, we're going to be playing Hole song for your background music now:

Go on, take everything, take everything I want you to

Bitter, angry music, though not being sung in a fake accent of any kind.

David and Mary: Mary says that she's spent all her time on TAR helping people. I must have missed that last time. Besides, didn't you say that you didn't need anyone?

Kevin and Drew, you're the last team to arrive... um, Drew? OK, you have to come back. I have to say this stuff and everything. No, really. Look, it's in your contract. Thank-you. Alright.

I'm sorry to tell you... Get back here. Seriously. Thank-you. OK.

I'm sorry to tell you... Hey, Native Greeter! Go sit on Drew would you? Thanks.

I'm sorry to tell you you've been eliminated from The Amazing Race. Ha! Said the whole thing.

OK, Greeter, you can let him go now.

Administrative Notes:

Please keep the game in the game thread.

New posters are welcome! All the Racers are taken. Anyone may post as a sound person or cameraman or taxi driver. Or hey, be creative! Post as a front-end loader or the guy who tried to get $100 out of Charla and Mirna and got a purse instead. Jump on in and play with us!