Awww David, Sorry I was away. I thank I lost my undawear in that mud and momma taught me to keep my panties on, so I had ta go back and find ‘em.

And tho we had some bad luck with the mud, I am so excited about all the money we are getting! We gots thardynine dollahs for this leg of the race. Lookeee Honey, we are getting rich rich rich!!! Just think of all them Big Macs we can buy! And them Russian cars, man those were Sweeeeet! So much nicer than the rusted out truck we gots.

Warn’t them homo-secks-you-alls cute? I likes ‘em. I just hope I don’t catch homo-secks-you-allity. I am not shure, but they told me it’s not catching. David, honey, let me know if you think I am havin’ any symptoms. But thay were so cute, I had ta hug ‘em.

So far, I am jus' havin the best time a'my life! Ain't that a hoot? David? David? Stop lookin' at them Booty Queens!

Did them Be-Youty Queens call us “bumpkins”? I wish they’d remember it’s Mr & Mrs Bumpkin, but I don’t wanna put on airs.