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PLEASE NOTE: The Reality TV World Message Boards are filled with desperate
attention-seekers pretending to be one big happy PG/PG13-rated family. Don't
be fooled. Trying to get everyone to agree with you is like herding cats,
but intolerance for other viewpoints is NOT welcome and respect for other
posters IS required at all times. Jump in and play, and you'll soon find out
how easy it is to fit in, but save your drama for your mama. All members are
encouraged to read the
complete guidelines.
As entertainment critic Roger
Ebert once said, "If you disagree with something I write, tell me so, argue
with me, correct me--but don't tell me to shut up. That's not the American way."
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"'COO-ROO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO' "
byoffer 15947 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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07-31-07, 10:56 PM (EST)
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"'COO-ROO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO' " |
Good day, eh, and welcome to the Great White North. I’m Bullzeye McKenzie, and this is my brother Sanjana McKenzie. 
Take off hose-head. My name is Sanjana, but I am no McKenzie. And this land of yours may be great, but it sure isn’t white. Will you at least have a beer and some donuts?? Okay Bullzeye, I will drink your good Cantadian beer. Now just leave me alone. Your sexuality confuses even me, and I’m just an inflatable banana. Okay peeps, so here we go. After beating Bullzeye in 11 straight games of beer hunter (he’ll never learn) I left for a weekend of frivolity in the near northern part of Ontario, otherwise known by Torontonians as Cottage Country. Just remember, a weekend of cottaging in Ontario is decidedly different than a weekend of cottaging in England. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but this is a family adventure. The Yoffer family to be exact. Interesting side note here. Turns out this byoffer fellow is not By-Offer, but rather B.Yoffer, or just Yoffer. Much in the same way that J.Slice is Slicey. So henceforth here I will refer to the Yoffer family. Our adventure began with a 2 hour drive out of Toronto. I was a little antsy at first, as there was a cat on the scene and those claws always skeer us inflatable types. Luckily the cat got dropped off at the cat spa (read Nana and Papa’s house) and we were claw-free for the weekend. Not a worry in the world for an inflatable banana… or so I thought. After the drive I needed to unwind, so YofferGirl took me down to the lake to air out.
Talk about a lot of open space. Bee-you-ti-ful! I haven’t seen that much air since that weekend in San Fran with whats-her-name *coughBraviecough* After some fresh air YofferBoy suggested we stretch out for a bit. After 2 hours in the car I would have expected him to have more energy, but…
Enough of this lounging around – I was looking for a little action! YofferGirl and YofferBoy thought I might like a turn at archery…
 But their idea of participation skeered me more than the damn cat!! 
So I called foul and put an end to that game. YofferBoy had another suggestion, but nice as he is, he just doesn’t relate well to the plight of the inflatable banana! 
Finally I was able to talk YofferBaby (YofferToddler?) into some play time. This kid really gets me.
 
That was so much fun, I decided to let the little whipper-snapper take me for a ride in the canoe…
 It was really cool – we even saw a turtle sunning on a log…
Then we played a really cool game that was basically 39 days compressed into a few minutes. They say no man is an island, but the same can’t be said for a banana. It should come to no-ones surprise that someone with my pedigree should end up as the Sole Survivor…
 When we returned from all that canoeing it was time to enjoy the water and work on my tan. I feel a bit bad for making Yoffer look so white. He just couldn’t keep up to my natural tan. YofferBoy, on the other hand, obviously gets out in the sun more than his father. 
I didn’t want to get too much sun, as no-one likes a banana with age spots, so I retired to the shade. Now Yoffer called this a chair hammock, but to me it looked a lot like one of those “special activity chairs” they sell on the back of Hustler magazine. Oh wait, this is a family adventure, and besides, there are children’s toys in the picture.
While I was relaxing I decided to help myself to a nice cold Canadian beverage. Yoffer kept saying something about "the pride of Nova Scotia"…

I have to come clean here – I drank too much. Being American I just wasn’t ready for that high-octane Canadian beer. So I lay down on Yoffer’s bed for a rest, and had visions of Stanley Cups running through my head…
 I was resting nicely when all of a sudden Mrs. Yoffer woke me up…
 Let’s just say in respect of the family nature of this thread that my mind is blank on the next several hours. and everyone promise not to tell Yoffer, mkay??  After all that time in bed I needed a real sleep, so I crashed with the YofferKidlets. Poor YofferGirl, she drew the short stick and got the couch, while I scored the bottom bunk.
 Sunday was another great day in the sun. The water was great, the sun was shining, and everyone was in good spirits. Alas, it was time to leave, and move on to another leg of my Amazing Race: Banana Edition. Thanks to the Yoffer family for all of their hospitality, and special thanks to Mrs. Yoffer for her special hospitality. 
Now on to see some Seana lady. I sure hope she makes Rice Krispie Squares for me!  It's a banana! It's a blog! It's a Banana Blog!
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agman 11166 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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07-31-07, 11:22 PM (EST)
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2. "RE: 'COO-ROO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO' " |
Yoffer, excellent pictures. It's great to see what you really look like. I keep picturing you looking like the cartoon character in your siggie! It looks like Sanjana had a great time at the cabin too. Bullz, gotta say, I'm impressed, that's a big banana you have there! *looks down feeling very jealous* "Dan, please pass the extra small over here"
 Smokey's mom sends it out of the park
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motormouth 4507 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Stuff Magazine Centerfold"
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08-01-07, 03:45 AM (EST)
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5. "RE: 'COO-ROO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO' " |
Wonderful recap, B. Yoffer! Thank you for sharing the nana adventure with us. *smooch* Flashy sig by RollDdice
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brvnkrz 20491 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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08-01-07, 08:11 AM (EST)
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8. "RE: 'COO-ROO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO' " |
Just so ya know, I can see up your trunks in that picture of you working on your tan. 
RIP, Bill Walsh
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brvnkrz 20491 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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08-01-07, 09:03 AM (EST)
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15. "RE: 'COO-ROO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO' " |
So you aren't wearing any pants at all? It must have been a Wednesday.
RIP, Bill Walsh
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CTgirl 8013 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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08-01-07, 08:24 AM (EST)
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9. "RE: 'COO-ROO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO' " |
LAST EDITED ON 08-01-07 AT 08:27 AM (EST)Looks like Sanjaya is having a great time in Canada! I love those "special activity" chair hammocks. They look crazy, but are so comfortable. If I could get the Yoffer kids to be my cabana people, I'd sit there all day with the great view and a book and never move (except maybe for a swim)! Great banana story!
Summertime by Sharnina
ETF grammar
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dragonflies 8051 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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08-01-07, 10:29 AM (EST)
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22. "RE: 'COO-ROO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO' " |
I got it too. Even the 'musical' version of the words.

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bullzeye 5030 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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08-01-07, 10:35 AM (EST)
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24. "RE: 'COO-ROO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO' " |
My name is Sanjana, but I am no McKenzie. And this land of yours may be great, but it sure isn’t white.Hey! Is the Sanjaya taking a cheap shot ot my tan? Tell the banana to look out for sharp objects next Monday night! Great pics of you all - I have serious banana cottage envy! And, I will never get over how cute BabyOffer is!
Snidget's to blame!
Now just leave me alone. Your sexuality confuses even me, and I’m just an inflatable banana. A guy crushes on one AI contestant and never, ever get's to live it down? Oh well, Blakie was worth it.
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agman 11166 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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08-01-07, 11:01 AM (EST)
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26. "RE: 'COO-ROO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO' " |
A guy crushes >on one AI contestant and >never, ever get's to live >it down? Oh well, >Blakie was worth it. Not that there is anything wrong with that of course  It's just a day at the beach
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Puffy 6705 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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08-01-07, 12:05 PM (EST)
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30. "RE: 'COO-ROO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO-COO' " |
This is a wonderful Sanjana tale with your beautiful family. Your children are adorable (at least in pictures). 
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brvnkrz 20491 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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08-01-07, 10:24 PM (EST)
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40. "Banana Hammock" |
You have the nicest banana hammock.
RIP, Bill Walsh
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