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"Official Summary: Hellís Kitchen 4, Episode 8: A Not So Divine Comedy"
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Snidget 43862 desperate attention whore postings
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05-25-08, 01:11 PM (EST)
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"Official Summary: Hellís Kitchen 4, Episode 8: A Not So Divine Comedy"
Official Summary: Hellís Kitchen 4, Episode 8: A Not So Divine Comedy

It has been awhile since Iíve written a summary. Why am I in this hand basket? *looks up at sign over doorway

ďLasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate"
ďEntrata di consegnaĒ

Uh Oh, VIRGIL!!!

Virgil: So how can I help you Snidget?
Snidget: Is this what I think it is?
Virgil: Iím not a mind reader, but that is the back entrance to Hellís Kitchen.
Snidget: #%$%# &^%^&% @&$%^$
Virgil: Youíll fit right in, but for this adventure, you are on your own. *flees*
Snidget: Coward!

Last week in Hellís Kitchen

Matt and Ben fought. Matt joined the Red Team. Matt helped the women win the taste challenge. Rosann was a disaster, Petrozza was a mess, Jen gave attitude, Ben pushed Ramsey over the edge, Matt got a rare compliment. The men lost and Ben left Hellís Kitchen. One of the Red Team will have to join the Blue Team. For all the details see Pikachuís summary here

Both teams thinking about the upcoming swap.

Louross says he has no conflict with the girls but if they are a *bleep* Big-Headed Person (sorry Louross, wrong show, the big headed person is David Cook over on American Idol, the fumes down here must be really bad) they are going to have to set her straight. Meanwhile on the girlís team they are talking Jen into going as sheíd be a good asset over there. Of course Corey isnít interested in Jen getting to show her stuff, it is all about Corey getting her voice back. So the sooner Jen is out, the better. Jen says Corey is a manipulative azz b!tch.

After a night of deliberations it is time for volunteers. Jen says the Red Team is safe and she doesnít play it safe as a chef, she wants to see who on the Blue Team is strong or not. Ramsey says she is sniffing out the competition and the men are willing to take her. Louross doesnít know if she will be a blessing or a curse, or maybe theyíll be lucky and all get to go to Purgatory Kitchen found in the next cantica in the series. Jen goes to the blue and if she can make a difference over there, nothing will stop her. Christina is happy about the move because Jen is the immovable object to the rest of the girls irresistible force.

Todayís challenge is all about improvising. 20 items 4 dishes per team, all 20 items must be used as a team, and no ingredient can be repeated. 45 minutes are alloted for the challenge. The Red Team is off and running, and Jen is slowing things down on the blue side by taking all the ingredients. 10 minutes in the Blue Team is still separating out ingredients while the Red Team is cooking. However, Matt tries to add a secret ingredient by slicing off the tip of his thumb. Flesh slicing, that makes this Bolgia 9 in the Eighth Circle, with the sowers of discord. *checks GPS* It agrees, I should have known *shakes head*. So heís off to see the Medic, the wonderful medic of Oz. The girls are worried because they are now a person down and they still have to get all the dishes made. They are rallying to get his dish done as well as their own until Ramsey asks the all important question, ďWhereís the top of the finger gone?Ē They canít find it, but they are checking the now cooking pancetta he was cutting up when the accident happened.

The Red Team keeps on going with solid communication, while the Blue Team is quite and they seem to be using the same ingredients in different dishes. Bobby thinks they are like a wild pack of dogs. Um, Bobby, packs actually do know how to divide up the labor and work as a team, so you ainít dogs. Not sure what you are, but you ainít anything that hunts in packs. Matt is in a lot of pain, but comes back to help finish the challenge because he is a good pack-mate and doesnít want his team to lose. 10 minutes to go and the Blue Team still has veal to put into some dish or other. It is decided that it will go with Lourossís fish as a surf and turf. Surf and turf is not his thing and he canít figure out how to put the veal on the plate with the fish. Time is up and the Blue Team isnít finished plating. Louross says he has a rustic dish ready to go and putting the veal on there will just throw the whole thing off. Good to see you let your ego get in the way of actually following the rules of the challenge. Jen tells him to say he used the rendered fat of the veal to cook the fish, but he says that lie would haunt him forever.

Red team did you use the time wisely? Yes Chef. Did you use all 20 items? Yes Chef

Christina vs Petrozza up first.

Christina: Fried Snapper with Crab Meat and a Hollandaise style sauce, used 5 of the 20 items. Ramsey likes it and thinks it was clever to use the eggs in the sauce.

Petrozza: Warm Crab Salad with an Onion Souffle. He used 5 items. Ramsey says very brave doing a souffle and it was perfect.

They are both winners so the score is 1:1

Jen vs Matt up second.

Jen: Pancetta Wrapped Roasted Quail with 4 ingredients.

Matt: Pan roasted Quail with Arugula, used 6 ingredients. Ramsey says he should have pulled out the liver because the flavor tainted the dish.

Score is Blue 2: Red 1

Corey and Bobby

Corey: Columbian Sour-Lemon Chicken with Braised Artichokes. Used 3 items. Tasty but a bit of a disappointment as it was a bit plain.

Bobby. Walnut-Encrusted Buffalo Mozzarella Chicken with Balsamic Glaze. Used 6 items, the Glaze is horrendous. Far too much of it there.

Score is now tied at 2:2

Rosann and Louross.

Rosann: Pan-seared Veal, bone in. with a cream sauce, garlic onion and watercress with oven roasted potatoes. Used 6 items Clumsy dish youíd share with your dog.

Louross: Red Snapper with an oyster-mushroom sauce. Used the preserved lemons to deglaze then just sauteed it. Used 4 items. Jen says stupid azz under her breath.

Chef can add, he asks whereís the veal. Jen says Lourossís idea was to use it as a surf and turf but then didnít put it on at the last minute. Where is the veal? On the cutting board. Ramsey says ď20 items is 20 itemsĒ The test was to maximize on the ingredients given you. You failed. Back in line. Petrozza whining about the veal as it was ďRight There!Ē

Blue Team will spend all day doing laundry. Washing, steaming, all by hand. Winners are going to a photo shoot and interview for In Touch magazine. Matty was hoping for the photo shoot prize. Louross apologizes to Petrozza. He had all my items clear until he had to put the veal into place. Jen says it was selfish of him to do that, stupid *bleep* stupid.

Ramsey in a nice suit for the photo suit. Everyone there is cleaning up nicely. Back at the kitchen Jean-Phillipe tempts fate by teasing Jen with her little feisty friend, a crab. Luckily for him, her aim isnít very good and the laser beams coming out of her eyes go off to the left just like in this video. She is pissed off and no she isnít going to be happy. Petrozza says Jen is like a volcano that can go off and destroy their whole village. Nice edit of Jen putting on her own lip gloss as Christina is getting hers put on by the makeup artist at the shoot. Way to rub it in.

The girls are all in red, Matt is in a Tux, and hiding his belly behind the door of a car. Back in Hell they are still scrubbing, and Jean-Phillipe says she isnít a good pack member and it isnít fair to her team to be b!tchy all day.

Red Team notices the Jen is really angry when they get back. Bobby says she needs to shake it off because it can be a dangerous game she is playing. Jen and Louross bicker back and forth. The Red team is so happy to have the bully gone. They say they will work together and win.

Ramsey asks what is it like not having Jen, they say it is great. Jen tells Ramsey that they have come together and are working as a team. After we get back from the medicís reinserting the eyes the rest of the Blue Team rolled so hard they fell right out we learn that tonight there will be two of Americaís finest food critics in the house. Their reviews will help determine who wins the service. He doesnít know where they are sitting, but in Ramseyís world every table is a critic table. Jen is peeved that the women are glad to have her gone and are back-stabbing her, after all she does all her stabbing from the front with witnesses and everything.

Hellís Kitchen is now open and the service starts as the demonís arrive. The critics have also arrived. The teams will be going head to head. They have ordered the same dishes from each kitchen. Corey is going to lead the team now that Jen is gone and there is someone she actually wants to impress around. Her risotto is nice and the Red Teamís appetizers are at the criticís table. Can Jen and Louross deliver for the Blue Team? Louross knows if they lose he will be on the chopping block. He barely gets them up to the pass in time, but they are perfect.

45 minutes in and 1/2 the Red teamís appetizers are out and they are starting on the entrees. Mattís fillets are very different sizes and that isnít good enough to have the Three Bears of Beef dish. Ramsey says Mr. Inconsistant, wake up.

{I am not making this up} Voice over says, ďWhile Matt tries to control his shrinkage, the Blue Team is eager to show they can keep up the good work.Ē

Ramsey wants to know why Petrozza cut the tenderloin early.

{I am not making this up} Ramsey says, ďWhy did you cut the beef, now?Ē He just couldnít contain himself, he had to peek. Now they have to hurry up because Petrozzaís cut the beef. Thank goodness he isnít on the cheese station. His beef is ready but they are waiting on Lourossís salmon.

55 minutes into service, the appetizers are done. Petrozzaís blunder may keep the demons waiting. Petrozza gets confused when Ramsey calls the next ticket. Jen steps up to get them back on track. Corey is taking the lead in the Red Kitchen. Christina's salmon gets to the pass, one of these sides doesnít look like the other and she has to do it again. Ramsey tells her if she canít do two things at once she shouldnít be there, and as she whines about having too much to do Ramsey tells her to shut up.

The critics get the salmon and it has a vague but not great flavor, not happy with Christinaís salmon. Lourossís salmon up next and it is more flavorful. The Blue Team has all the entrees out, but even the critics notice the poor demons on the Red Side of the room donít have their food, yet. Rosann catches the garnishes on fire. Ramsey says ďYou are not trustworthy on service and Iím nervous with you in the kitchen.Ē That is the last order of gnocchi she has so she will be short an order. She is also running out of carrot puree. The Blue Team is keeping the momentum up. Petrozza says they are like Super Glue, um Blue. Matt is falling apart. He brings up some badly done beef to the pass. Ramsey dares him to serve it to see what standards he has. He says he wonít serve it. He shows it to the whole team. They all say they wonít serve, it. Ramsey wants to know why they would give it to him, then. He throws the Red Team out of the kitchen.

Three hours in, the Blue Team has finished all the entrees, the Red Team is kicked out. Matt feels like a horrible failure and cries over it. Corey doesnít appreciate people not following her lead. The Blue Team comes in to save the day. Jenís mania kicks in as she celebrates over this. The critics said the Blue Teamís food was well arranged and really good. The food was sloppy and lacked passion and flavor from the Red Team. Ramsey says Corey was the best of the worst with a solid performance and she will pick two people for nomination.

Rosann tries to not throw Matt under the bus as she throws him under the bus. Christina say she and Rosann deserve to be up there, but Rosann deserves it more and Rosann and Matt should go up. Corey says they are all trying to throw the blame on someone else and sheís made her mind up, but sheíd like to put all three up.

Corey nominates Matt for his performance tonight, and the second nominee is Rosann because she never wants to work with her again. Ramsey also calls Christina up for her poor performance, so Corey gets all three up for elimination anyway. Christina, why should you stay. Tonight was really bad, but I can do better, and she says she isnít out of her depth. Rosann says she should stay because she is learning so much. She is sent back in line. Mattís third time here. He disagrees that it should be three strikes and your out. The person leaving Hellís Kitchen is Rosann. Take your jacket off and go back to your daughter. She will tell her daugher to keep on trying no matter what happens. Christina needs to bounce back so she can stay. Matt is on borrowed time.

If oneís mouth was a sign of talent Rosann would be a world class chef, but she just has a big mouth.

Next week. Jen rubs people the wrong way, again.

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  Table of Contents

  Subject     Author     Message Date     ID  
 RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitche... Seana 05-26-08 1
 RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitche... mysticwolf 05-26-08 2
 RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitche... bullzeye 05-27-08 3
   RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitche... Snidget 05-27-08 4
       RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitche... agman 05-27-08 5
           RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitche... Snidget 05-27-08 6
               RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitche... bullzeye 05-27-08 7
                   RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitche... Ahtumbreez 05-27-08 8

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Seana 5044 desperate attention whore postings
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05-26-08, 01:44 AM (EST)
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1. "RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitchen 4, Episode 8: A Not So Divine Comedy"
Well done, Snidget!

I'm so proud I figured out that Latin phrase. Really liked the Divine Comedy references, as well as:

Ramsey wants to know why Petrozza cut the tenderloin early.

{I am not making this up} Ramsey says, ďWhy did you cut the beef, now?Ē He just couldnít contain himself, he had to peek. Now they have to hurry up because Petrozzaís cut the beef. Thank goodness he isnít on the cheese station.

Jen is peeved that the women are glad to have her gone and are back-stabbing her, after all she does all her stabbing from the front with witnesses and everything.


The beef-cutting bit made The Soup, too.

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mysticwolf 10692 desperate attention whore postings
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05-26-08, 02:21 PM (EST)
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2. "RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitchen 4, Episode 8: A Not So Divine Comedy"
Great job, Snidget! Loved the Virgil references. Dante comes to mind, also. I think Ramsay abandoned all hope of this group awhile back.


A smokeysmom
"In the end we will conserve only what we love. We will love only what we understand. We will understand only what we are taught." - Baba Dioum

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bullzeye 4956 desperate attention whore postings
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05-27-08, 12:26 PM (EST)
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3. "RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitchen 4, Episode 8: A Not So Divine Comedy"
Awesome summary Snidget!!! Many, many LOL moments though it did take me a moment to connect with the cheese reference!


Chiseled by Abman Agman!

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Snidget 43862 desperate attention whore postings
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05-27-08, 01:28 PM (EST)
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4. "RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitchen 4, Episode 8: A Not So Divine Comedy"
You? had to think about the fart joke?

Are you trying to get your man card revoked?

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agman 11158 desperate attention whore postings
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05-27-08, 06:13 PM (EST)
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5. "RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitchen 4, Episode 8: A Not So Divine Comedy"
>You? had to think about the
>fart joke?
>
>Are you trying to get your
>man card revoked?


The fact he had to think about the fart joke is just a minor offense. Bullz is still a member in good standing of the man association! His card cannot be revoked!


sculpted by Tribe
now if he had found the comment offensive, or did not find it funny, that would be a whole different ball game and we would have to seriously consider continuing his membership in the man association!

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Snidget 43862 desperate attention whore postings
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05-27-08, 07:33 PM (EST)
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6. "RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitchen 4, Episode 8: A Not So Divine Comedy"


Should I direct Agman to the SYTYCD forum, or just leave it alone?
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bullzeye 4956 desperate attention whore postings
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05-27-08, 07:58 PM (EST)
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7. "RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitchen 4, Episode 8: A Not So Divine Comedy"
Should I direct Agman to the SYTYCD forum, or just leave it alone?

I think we should encourage my "wingman" to join in on the fun - he does so at his peril though - just as I did last year!


Chiseled by Abman Agman!

I'll actually be out of town for a funeral for the next couple of episodes - I'll be certain to join back in upon my return though.

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Ahtumbreez 10456 desperate attention whore postings
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05-27-08, 11:36 PM (EST)
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8. "RE: Official Summary: Hellís Kitchen 4, Episode 8: A Not So Divine Comedy"
You all have to remember, this man *points up* tried to pass himself off as a virgin just last week.


Standing applause Snidget - great summary. Wheeeeee.


Agman took me to the islands


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