I admit I woke up very early. I also admit that I deemed it too early and went back to sleep until 7:30am. I was somewhat saddened by the fact that not only did I not have any Starbucks to start my day with, but that if I wanted coffee at all, I would have to get dressed and go down to the restaurant to fetch some. I will also admit that I am not a morning person and it’s best not to come face to face with me for any kind of conversation until I have had at least the first cup of java for the day. Now, the fine folks who run the restaurant are the nicest, if not terribly efficient, people you would ever want to meet. I saved myself some hassle and ordered 2 cups to go so that I wouldn’t have to make this journey again. With a cup in each hand, I retreated to my room to watch Gilligan’s Island, in black and white no less, and drink my coffee while addressing some postcards, just to get a jump on it. The coffee left a lot to be desired, like a real cup of coffee for instance.
By 9 I was on the road, thinking about going to Little Beach and getting an all over tan for a couple hours. You know what they say about the best laid plans? But I am a flexible, go with the flow kind of chick so although I did make it as far as Big Beach before turning around, I skipped little beach. The traffic was heavier and slower than I would have thought and I wanted to see a lot of the island before going back to work at the airport for the afternoon.
Driving north and through Kehei, I stopped for another cup of coffee at a Bad A$$ coffee store. Finally, a cup of joe with some flavor and kick to it. Walking back to the parking lot, I passed a store that had peaked my interest when I passed it the first time when I was going by it to get to Bad A$$. I just had to go in to check out “The Love Shack”. How appropriate. I ended up spending an hour there and bought a couple new toys, as well as made a new friend. Most of the time was spent talking to Mel, who was working and she was such a joy to chat with that we exchanged business cards and promised to keep in touch. She had a phone call to deal with and I needed to get back on the road so off I went, new toys stowed in the trunk.
I drove north on Hwy 31 to Hwy 30, through Lahaina, Kaanapali, Honokowai, Kahana, Kapalua. And what a stunning drive. The road narrows and winds a bit after Kapalua. This is the point where I started taking mental notes of the road hazard signs. The signs that indicated a sharp turn also said honk horn. How fun is that? I quickly learned the reason for honking. The road narrows severely at the bends in the road and you can’t see what may be coming from the opposite direction. The speed limits that are posted are low speeds anyway so I was not concerned and smiled at others’ honking their horns as they came around in the opposite direction, as did they.
Not only did you not know what or if anything might be coming around the bends, but each new curve brought new panoramas of breathtaking beauty to behold. High above the ocean, climbing the mountains it was almost like driving the canyons back in Colorado and in places where it felt like driving the coastline in California. Around one curve there was a pullout, below it a magnificent view of the waves crashing on the rocks. I pulled over and my knees almost buckled. I didn’t realize I had been sitting behind the wheel long enough to forget what my legs and feet were for. I stretched a bit and the driver of the only car that was there asked if I would like to buy some bud, which he held up out of the window in his hand.
I guess in retrospect I should have realized from the beat up car with the windshield that was one big spider web looking mess, from God knows what went through it, that this would be a local out pedaling his wares on a lovely Saturday afternoon. How on earth did I miss that? I must say, at the very least he was polite and caused me no worry for declining. No Maui wowie for this chick. But it was strange to be offered the bud since I was semi-business dressed. Hmmm, maybe he had smoked some and didn’t see the clean cut G-woman who he offered it to.
Back on the road and a few more curves and I was about to learn the truth in advertising of the hazard signs. Well, almost truth. Narrow road means 1and 1/2 lane(s), good luck. Winding road means 10MPH back to back to back hairpin turns for 5 miles. Falling rocks means almost what it says or part of the mountain has fallen in the road. End state highway means now that there is absolutely no way for you to turn back you are going on an adrenaline junkies dream of off road adventure or nightmare, depending on how much of a junkie you are.
The road literally narrows to a one lane, not one lane in each direction mind you, road that is one blind curve after another. Not that the scenery isn’t beautiful on the way, but if you are driving alone, you are so focused on what you CAN’T see that much of the astounding waterfalls and forest-like setting is lost on you. Like perhaps another car coming from the opposite side of the mountain. Never drink coffee before you get here, just a word to the wise or from the now wise.
About 1/3 of the way up there is one large open gravel parking area where there sits a lunch wagon. Of course, if you have never been this way before, you don’t know you are only a third of the way there. I need to stop to take a breath, having forgotten for the 2 and 1/3 miles I have come so far, that one must do so. I am not certain if it is the altitude, lack of oxygen from not breathing or the extreme rush of what I have just been through, but to say I was lightheaded would be an understatement. So I ask the lady in the lunch truck if there is enough traffic for her to be in this spot or if she is just taking a break too. She tells me that yes, she gets enough business and I am slightly concerned about continuing if the rest of the road is identical to what I have just traversed. She tells me it gets better from here. I don’t comprehend that what this local really means is that it is more of an adrenaline rush than what I have had so far. Silly me.
I see a couple of cars coming up and thank her before jumping back on the lane behind the second vehicle. I figure there is safety in numbers as I haven’t seen a soul until now and what the heck, someone else can lead the way. Not that it made it less intense but at least I knew I wasn’t alone. I was able to enjoy the scenery a little more and I was overwhelmed by it. We did, indeed, pass other cars along the way and since there were three of us and only one oncoming, they found a way to pull over enough to let us squeeze by. I was not disappointed to see the sign that read begin state highway. At least there was good solid pavement and was wide enough to allow two cars to pass each other without the threat of death.
I wouldn’t trade the experience for anything and would most likely do it again some day but the normal roads we were back on allowed me to come down from the rush that was that 8 mile adventure and I was crashing physically. Okay, so it’s been awhile since I pumped that much adrenaline through my system and I hadn’t eaten anything all day. So I was nauseated and developing a headache. So I did what any red blooded American girl would do—I stopped at Jack-in-the-box and ordered up some fries and went to the bathroom.
By then it was time to go to work at the airport, which meant that I had to go though security to park the car. Not a big deal and he asks me to pop the trunk open so I comply. Yes the bag of toys is back there but I won’t realize until much later why he is amused by the contents therein. I finally get parked and go in to get my boarding pass like any other passenger so that I could get out on the concourse to do the job at hand. The place was packed and I spent time in lines with everyone else going through security.
I knew that I should have taken my shoes off like I had when I left Honolulu but they didn’t ask and so of course when I walked through their little archway I set off the alarm and was asked to step into the glass booth for criminals like myself who have the audacity to set off their fricking alarm. And like every other time I have been herded like a cow into a separate chute at the airport, I must wait for a female agent to come and give me the thorough search. It figures that I would endure this experience when I am not feeling 100% from the downside of my adrenaline high. But I am determined to make the best of it and stand on the little footmarks as I am instructed to do after having removed my shoes for the nice lady to go send through the x-ray machine. So there I stand, legs spread and arms out to the sides so she can run her little scanner over every inch of me and I am not hating the experience, I am amused that I look such a threat to them.
The young lady to my left, another criminal who has been herded here with the likes of me, accidentally hits my hand as she is raising her arms for yet another female agent. She apologizes and I shake her hand and say we might as well play and amuse ourselves while we are detained. And so we did, kind of like playing footsies only with our hands and laughing because what else can one do? And then my lady agent points at the front of my shorts and I am thinking she is going to make me unzip right there in public, but she just asked me to unbutton the top button and turn the top of my shorts down. And of all the times I have said I was going to buy the butterfly and try to wear it going through an airport, but I didn’t buy one and I am not wearing one and I am baffled that she seems to think that is what I am up to. I am here on business after all. She finally cleared me to go through.
When I was finally done working I went to my gate where my flight, that I had no intention of being on, was to depart from. I asked the nice lady behind the counter if I could possibly rebook my flight as I had decided to stay over and could I get a flight out the next week. She rebooked me and I was set to go. On my way out of the terminal I stopped at Starbucks to get a decent cup of coffee and got 2 so I could have one for the morning.
I arrived back at the hotel and amazingly got a parking space very close to the gate I had been using to get to my room. I collected my things from the car and was approaching my gate when I saw the note on it at about the same time one of the employees said that it was not working. She was kind enough to explain to me on the way through the dining room that someone had gotten angry and punched it and now the lock was jammed. But seeing as how she had let me take the shortcut and not have to walk all the way around to enter through the lobby, I wasn’t put out in the least.
It was when I got back up to the room when it dawned on me that I had left my new playthings in the trunk. Knowing the walk would do me good and hopefully wake me up, I cruised on down to retrieve them. When I opened the trunk, I understood why the parking security man was so amused. At some point during all the twists and turns on the mountain roads I had traveled during the course of the day, the toys had slid out of the black plastic bag they had started out in and were openly exposed. Such is my life.
I spent the remainder of the evening watching The Three Stooges, which is on one of the channels here 24/7. They still crack me up. All in all, it was a fabulous Saturday.
Fish and Game Officer of G.A.W.K.U.R's of OT
Handcrafted by RollDdice, who rocks my world as much as IceCat. Go here>http://community.realitytvworld.com/boards/DCForumID31/475.shtml, go now, I need you
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