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PLEASE NOTE: The Reality TV World Message Boards are filled with desperate
attention-seekers pretending to be one big happy PG/PG13-rated family. Don't
be fooled. Trying to get everyone to agree with you is like herding cats,
but intolerance for other viewpoints is NOT welcome and respect for other
posters IS required at all times. Jump in and play, and you'll soon find out
how easy it is to fit in, but save your drama for your mama. All members are
encouraged to read the
complete guidelines.
As entertainment critic Roger
Ebert once said, "If you disagree with something I write, tell me so, argue
with me, correct me--but don't tell me to shut up. That's not the American way."
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"Be The... Pirate Master 1.5"
tribephyl 9688 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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06-29-07, 02:52 AM (EST)
 
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"Be The... Pirate Master 1.5" |
*ding*ding* Pirates to the quarterdeck!
*urp*Okay...looks like we actually have a theme this week. It's called "Your Ambition". Sooo....Let's let Christa lead it off... Christa: I want my daughter to win the money. That's my ambition. Okay. Ummm..I hate to be the one to tell you but your daughter is NOT on the show. And as clearly stated in the rules there will be no sharing of the prize money. Next? Jay: To win, of course. Yo. Jay. You gotta stop giving away the ending away. We're only 5 episodes in and you keep spoiling the ending. Knock it off or we'll have to change our time-slot to ... NEVER. Nessa: Flirting. Boys. Flirting. Boys. Did I mention Flirting with boys? See... that was easy, right? Sean: Almost as easy as she herself is. Ouch. Nice one Sean. *urp*
So Sean, what's your ambition? Sean: To be outpirated by a slut. MB? Can we make that happen? MB: Just keep to the script Daddo. Okay....Well, I've got a crappy ambitious story for you. It stars a faux-celebrity poker player and his ambition to confuse pirates by using playing cards as clues. Sadly it didn't work and the RedTeam pirates succeeded in nabbing the big hand and dethroning Cap'n Louie. Okay red guys? Who would you like to lead you in this weeks PC? Laurel: I vote to install Cap'n Amsterdam and his merry bunch of spotted dicks. Sounds great folks *urp* Boy, I really need to start staying on a boat because everytime I get here I start getting seasick...*uhhhh* Pardon *URF*. Ahem, okay. I'm gonna go away for a bit. You guys discuss what you want to do for the rest of the show.
I'm gonna go hurl, and re-discuss my contract with MB to see if we can't find an Australian Chen-Bot to take over for me. That's my ambition. *urp* ....
*A mere 5 hours later*
Productorial page: Ummm....Mr Daddo? You're needed on the Barque.
Great Emu droppings. I'm really not feeling so well. We didn't find a robot to replace me?
Productorial page: We're still looking into it. I did bring some dramamine... here you go, bottoms up.
*gulpgulpgulp*urp* Allrighty Pirates. *sways to left* whoa...*holds onto starboard railing* Let's get this over with quicklike. Ummm Who got black marks? Okay. Laurel. Safe. It's between Sean and Louie. If Sean spent some money he could be safe. If not, Louie, you will be safe.
Looks like Nessa splurged on a big bag of nothing so...*urp*
SorryseanyouhavebeencutadriftAlasIhardlymissye'! *runs off screen*
You can call me Daddo.
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agman 11158 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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06-29-07, 09:21 AM (EST)
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1. "RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.5" |
LAST EDITED ON 06-29-07 AT 09:26 AM (EST)arrggh lets see, stabbed me mates in the back, conspired to get rid of that hot wench Nessa, thought I had everything figured out. I don't have a clue why those swabbies cut me adrift. goodbye Cameron, I'll hardly miss ye.(I will be missin yer Dubloons though) Nessa, we may not be gettin along, but yer still has a fine backside!
argh matey, me arse has been sent adrift out here amongst the lawyers...I means
sharks!!!ah carp, something just bit me..........
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kingfish 16088 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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06-29-07, 10:36 AM (EST)
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2. "RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.5" |
That was just one of us (the pinch). Wrong Way Freddy. Our invasion was suppose to start, but Wrong Way went after the recently cut-adrift instead of one of the remaining crew.Waste of time, and he exposed our plans to "TAKE OVER THE WORLD" too soon. But, well, you'd have to know Freddy to know why that made sense. To him. You see, a surfer skin creature stepped on him when he was molting, and his carapace is, well, a little flatter than normal. We love him anyway, but he won't be on any future raids. So we retreat back to our crab holes and we regroup. Setting put DeCon on the outer perimeter for the dreaded and despicable shore rats. They are dreaded, and despicable (did I mention that?) 
tribe
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agman 11158 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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07-05-07, 11:46 AM (EST)
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26. "RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.5" |
> For some reason instead of
>hearing the music from Jaws,
>I'm hearing The Pink Panther!
> I think you have
>some of the
>Da duh Da duh daduh daduhdaduh...s
>in the wrong order.
>
Hey cut me some slack, I'm gettin eaten by sharks here!
argh matey, me arse has been sent adrift out here amongst the lawyers...I means
sharks!!!ah carp, something just bit me..........
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rasslinmomma 938 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
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07-01-07, 10:16 AM (EST)
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5. "RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.5" |
Cameron, I've got ambition too....I want to play the "Anybody but me" card and vote for whoever the boys say! It's a winning strategy, just ask Sandra. Everybody keeps calling me one of the weakest in the challenges, but ye haven't seen a black spot on me lately, have ye? I'm filling me pockets with plunder, and I don't even have to be the strongest, or the smartest, or the prettiest, or the sluttiest, or anything!!!! 
Guys, what am I supposed to do next? Just tell me, 'cause I'll back voting off anybody.
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agman 11158 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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07-05-07, 05:38 PM (EST)
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38. "RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.5" |
LAST EDITED ON 07-05-07 AT 05:39 PM (EST)*snort, wipes diet coke off the screen* well nessa ye wench, ya just got yerself told! bwahahahahahahahahah  (don't worry nessa, ya still me fav)
argh matey, me arse has been sent adrift out here amongst the lawyers...I means
sharks!!!ah carp, something just bit me..........
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kingfish 16088 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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07-05-07, 08:48 AM (EST)
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21. "RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.5" |
Arrr..Oobies? Pirates ain't got oobies... Pirates got cannon balls... Or Grapeshot.. (Or BB- shot) or even some version of sea-going mammals (dolphins, humpbacks - no, wait, that's reserved for something else - whales, or 'Que Orca-citas!') or whatever, but not oobies. I mean, oobies? "Oh you great big pirate man, does you momma know you talk like that? And make frilly lace for you to wear to church? Ooohh." By the skeleton of Davy Jones himself, when you left your landlubbing ways, you left your 'Oobies', your boobies, your hooters, your bananas, your peaches, all that non-pirate approved mud-crawler lingo behind. If ye be a'going piratin', ye should at least sound like a pirate. Aye, and that that thar accent, Azmuth? I ain't never heard a real pirate captain speak like that, except on the 'Lavender Lady'. And them boys? Well them boys swung their cutlass left-handed, savy? I mean, pirating bein' what it is, most pirates try that left handed cutlass swinging once in a while, but ye just don't talk like that. Pirates got he-man macho seadogs images, so straighten up and talk right. What goes on in the Captains cabin,..... The Pirate's Wiki-Reference!
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kingfish 16088 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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07-01-07, 03:14 PM (EST)
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8. "RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.5" |
Oh, and by the way, I'm taking names. Anyone who chops on my railing don't deserve to be kept from the sharks. Before this is over they get strapped to the anchor. Pulling out the cutlass and whacking out chunks of ones gunnell? That is just rude. Even for pirates. So far:
Joe (2)
Azmyth (2)
Louie(1) Ye Olde Pirate Ship
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kingfish 16088 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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07-01-07, 07:32 PM (EST)
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11. "RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.5" |
LAST EDITED ON 07-01-07 AT 09:52 PM (EST)Barnacles! An old ship's best friend. And the scuppers are only crusty because of the skin creatures not managing to get their pitiful heaving over the rail (may they get splinters in their chins). Rum is what leads to the crusty scuppers, these 'Pirates' can't even hold their grog. The rats are obviously scared off by the fearsome attacks of the Crab Union. We have rat tail trophies stuffed and mounted above our burrow mantles. Oh for the day of real pirates, not secretaries and bartenders playing pirate games. Ye Increasingly Angry Old Pirate Ship!
Hoist the lot of 'um. Then hoist a lot of rum.
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agman 11158 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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07-05-07, 12:21 PM (EST)
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30. "RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.5" |
LAST EDITED ON 07-05-07 AT 12:21 PM (EST)>Who's Joy? Who's Joy? >AWWWWKKK!! psst, Polly me rolickin' bucaneer. Joy be's a fine lookin' wench everyone jumps for when they are happy!
Shiver me timbers mateys
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Bravehart 264 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
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07-05-07, 02:19 PM (EST)
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32. "RE: Be The... Pirate Master 1.5" |
Avast Ye swabs!Me ambition is to have all ye swabs on me side! Count me in the Pirate Southpaw Coalition! Me promises no spoilers this week. Howsever, me does 'av a giggle fer yous.
A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible." "What do you mean?" said the pirate, "I feel fine."
Bartender: "What about the wooden leg? You didn't have that before."
Pirate: "Well, we were in a battle and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I'm fine now."
Bartender: "Well, okay, but what about that hook? What happened to your hand?"
Pirate: "We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook. I'm fine, really."
Bartender: "What about that eye patch?"
Pirate: "Oh, one day we were at sea and a flock of birds flew over. I looked up and one of them ##### in my eye."
"You're kidding," said the bartender, "you couldn't lose an eye just from bird #####."
Pirate: "It was my first day with the hook."
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agman 11158 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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07-05-07, 03:47 PM (EST)
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35. "RE: Attention: all hands." |
>-- I've just been informed that
>The Rusty Chenbot has taken
>our timeslot without a fight.
> Or a single casualty.
>
>
>You are all in deep trouble. Ya see, I was the glue that held this show together and kept us afloat.... Ya cuts me adrift last week and ya caused bad karma. Oh I hope ya barnacle brains suffer for the terrible way in which ya treated me..... 
Keelhauled by tribe
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