As a follow up to last week’s awesome “Rolling Stones” theme (compliments of Michel’s recrap) I was thinking of incorporating a Beatles Anthropology for last night’s episode.I’d start with <The Night Before> referencing the prior evening’s TC; <With a Little Help from My Friends> (actually one main friend—Omar,) <Don’t Bother Me> when a confession lamented over how no one back at home bothers to want to work with a particular castaway, and <I’ll Cry Instead> at the IC. Then it dawned on me, I’d be composing an entire post on just Maryanne! Since this is the Basher Forum, it wouldn’t be fair if I didn’t spread the wealth...it wouldn’t be generous...
We have no “Previously on Survivor” where we would have seen/heard Maryanne owing her Survivor life to Omar...the same Omar who in the previous episode owed his Survivor life to Jonathan...well...rather than turn this post into the “Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon,” I’ll just proceed with the recrap.
The episode opens with the merge tribe name “Kula-Kula” appearing on the screen. Curious to know how and who came up with that name. Perhaps the “Ku” is from Taku, the “a” is from Ika; but there’s no “l” in Vati. Then again, the way Vati tribemates Rocksroy and Romeo spell names, it would be an explainable error.
Before the upcoming RC we get more B&B time. B&B = Backstories and Bellyaching.
One backstory is from Maryanne who shares yet ANOTHER sob story about her real life and her lack of inclusion where no one wants to ever work with her...yadda...yadda...yadda... Will Production just give her the damn million dollars right NOW so she can return home and try to live a better accepted life?!
As for the bellyaching, Mike continues to whine over the one vote he got from Chanelle. Has it ever occurred to him he may have a target on his back because of the advantage (now an II) he blabbermouthed to his tribe? In any event, he continues to grind his axe and refuses to let it go.
Mike is also keenly aware of the age discrimination being the greatest divide in Reality TV, and as the oldest castaway, he knows he must amp up his social game which he has been doing quite successfully. How successfully? He’s buffaloed Omar into believing a retired firefighter from Hoboken, NJ actually gives a hoot about the Muslim religion.
Ok, NOW we can get to the RC...well...not exactly...
...not before we are subjected to another Probst *whisper* PSST, I have a secret to share with the TV audience…explaining how he will not-so-conspicuously hide yet ANOTHER advantage underneath the Sandra/Daniel Sit-Out Bench. *un-whisper*
REWARD CHALLENGE
Rocks are drawn to establish two teams of five with one odd-person-out having to watch the challenge with no chance of indulging in PBJ sandwiches and potato chips. Maryanne draws the grey rock and must take a seat on the Sandra/Daniel Sit-Out Bench. Drea, in the best position this season with advantages, is also arguably the worst liar this season by volunteering to take Maryanne’s place because she “doesn’t like PBJ.”
There are two kinds of people in this world: 1) those who like PBJ, and 2) those with peanut allergies who can’t eat it. Com ‘on Drea—just fess up and admit the REAL reason you didn’t want to play is because you didn’t draw the same color rock as Survivor Stud Jonathan!
In the Survivor version of “the rich get richer,” Drea finds the “Beware” advantage while Jonathan does his “Michael Phelps—look Ma, one hand” impression to give his team an early lead. Not wanting to draw any extra attention to himself, he feels confident enough to defer the basketball toss leg to his 6 ft. Afro-American teammate.
While Rocksroy did his utmost to put that stereotype to bed, Omar jumps out to an impressive start nailing four of the necessary five shots and opens up a commanding lead. But no lead is large enough when Jonathan is on the opposing team waiting to come out of the bullpen. True to form, Jonathan erases Rocksroy’s embarrassingly pathetic effort and sinks his five shots to earn another food reward.
With each food reward we learn something new about Jonathan’s eating prowess. This time he informs us his daily caloric intake is 4,000 calories. With about 1,500 coming from just the 18 eggs consumed each morning (he shared with us at the last reward) I’m thinking that’s probably a lowball estimate. Perhaps at the next reward he’ll tell us how many pizzas he can devour in one sitting. When I was in college, I once downed 12 slices in 10 minutes, but that would only be an appetizer for this season’s stud.
Meanwhile, Drea reads the clue to her advantage and goes off to the water well to retrieve her prize. Problem is, being caught “red-handed” as mentioned in the clue was not figurative but literal as she had to reach into red paint to get her advantage. Actually, it shouldn’t have been a problem because she’s at the water well. During this current pandemic when everyone has been taken extra time and effort to excessively wash their hands completely, Drea uses a ladle administering a willy-nilly rinse to remove the evidence. She also attempts to “hide” her finding inside per pants pressed so tightly against her butt/thighs she might need a paint scrapper and turpentine to remove.
Why bash her for those approaches? Other than the fact we’re in “Bashers,” back at camp even the girl who has spent half this season with her eyes rolled to the back of her head (Tori) can see the bulge in her pants and paint on her arm.
Where do they find these people??!!
IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
*whisper* PSST, Probst has another secret to share with us before the castaways have the audacity to come in and share screen time with Jeff. This time it’s about negotiating rice for volunteers to sit out of the IC. *un-whisper*
Upon hearing what the IC entails, Lynze/Lindsay volunteers because it’s not a good challenge for her. Drea decides to sit out as well...maybe because she doesn’t “like” IC necklaces either. *snort* Maryanne takes a page out of Hye/Hai’s life script and starts carrying on and crying over rice deprivation. With the number of sit-outs negotiated at four, one more needs to sit out to receive an extra four-day rice allotment. Her “White Knight” who saved her hide last episode gallops to her rescue again and becomes the fourth.
Her tears worked—something she may want to keep in her memory bank in the event she’s able to sleighride to FTC. S33 sole survivor Adam parlayed his tears into $1,000,000.
The remaining seven must control a ball with two sticks while standing on a balance beam. In easily the most pathetic effort in the history of Survivor, at exactly ONE SECOND into the challenge, Hye/Hai is out. LBGTQ+++++++ watch parties across the nation must have let out a collective moan. Actually, with this sad cast of Production debacles it inevitably comes down to the defending IC winner Tori and Survivor Stud Jonathan. Did I mention this challenge takes place on a balance beam? There’s a reason Nadia Comaneci excelled on the balance bean and Mean Joe Green did not. Tori notches her second clutch win in as many ICs!
It's been evident with some viewers that Tori and Chanelle are not long for this game, thus it was no surprise it would be either/or at this TC. With Tori wearing the necklace, a predicable episode boot for what is shaping up to be a very predictable season, Chanelle serving as the first juror is all but a formality.
But Romeo, who has been out of the loop since the merge, is feeling very vulnerable. His vulnerability is turning into paranoia. How out of the loop is Romeo? Even Drea, the castaway Romeo pledged to “coach” into a better Survivor player, is treating him like yesterday’s news. Omar (who was able to flip the vote to Lydia saving Maryanne) goes for a repeat performance to flip the vote to Romeo saving Chanelle. But this time he’ll be going head-to-head with Mike—a man on a mission to make Chanelle pay.
TRIBAL COUNCIL
Car metaphors become the theme of this TC where we heard a lot of chatter about being a driver vs. being a passenger...blah...blah...blah... At approximately 8:58pm EST we finally understood the title of this episode when Hye/Hai states if you’re a passenger “you better be wearing a seatbelt.” For Maryanne, she’s been receiving extra care and safety by riding in the security of a “car seat.”
When the votes were read Mike power-played Omar and got what he wanted with Chanelle the eighth player voted off Survivor and the first member of the Jury. <Hye> offers a lame “miss you” followed by Chanelle’s non-verbal reaction of a “FU” expression before her torch is snuffed. Even Maryanne (within the security of her car seat) flashes a blindsided look wondering who knocked her White Knight off his horse.
NEXT TIME ON SURVIVOR:
With six men and four women remaining, a Battle of the Sexes” talk ensues among the men. But Jeff reveals TWO IC necklaces to be won. Historically, that means one for a man and one for a woman. Also, a double elimination in only a one-hour episode. Short of a threepeat IC effort, if Tori can escape this double elimination (forget the crow) I’ll eat my hat!!!
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