LAST EDITED ON 10-29-21 AT 11:44 PM (EST)

LAST EDITED ON 10-26-21 AT 02:47 PM (EST)

LAST EDITED ON 10-26-21 AT 02:45 PM (EST)

LAST EDITED ON 10-26-21 AT 02:44 PM (EST)

Well, it seems that due to disillusionment we have another week of having to entertain ourselves, which is OK because I recently took up playing poker. Hold’em. We usually have five or so players, rotating among the Survivor production crew, Island residents (sometimes Nathan shows up with some cute gossip about Island girls – they make catholic girls seem downright, well, Catholic), and we let a monkey sit in when we need to have a seat filled. As we all know, Hold’em is pure luck, which explains why he sometimes wipes us out. We have to spend the afternoon at the beach digging sand dollars to get our chip stacks, then we meet in my palm tree abode, far from the gang of angry coconut crabs circling below and laying siege at the base of my tree. Don’t know what they are angry about, but they are breaking boulders and small tree trunks with scary ease.

Jeff’s the only guy on the island with real money, so we let him sit in too. He keeps losing his shirt but that keeps all of the rest us with full closets of SPF50 Academy fishing shirts. Blue. There are a lot of blue fishing shirts in my closet. Thinking of having a yard sale.

Anyway, here are the spoilers for this week along with a few items up for sale:

Spoiler #1 (winner gets an SPF50 Academy fishing shirt. Light blue). In the Reward challenge, the old lady never leaves the starting line and sinks any chance her tribe had to win 1st prize (a visit by native Nathan who imparts all the winning tribe will need to know to survive), or 2nd prize (a fish that has been sitting in the sun for four hours - a parrot fish that eats coral and poops sand). Anyway, the rest of the tribe expresses their heart warming support for the poor decrepit old lady, with hugs, tears, and hidden knives. They are so glad that they won’t have to fight over who to vote out next.

Spoiler #2 (winner gets an SPF50 Academy fishing shirt. Dark blue). Jeff is delirious with joy after witnessing the ignominious defeat of the old lady. Makes his little stone heart proud (he exclaims) to see someone be humiliated and beat down so thoroughly. This is what keeps him coming back year after year.

Spoiler #3 (winner gets an SPF50 Academy fishing shirt. Teal). We tried using the baby turtles as chips, but we soon got tired of them squiggling away and having to wade in to retrieve them. Ruined the flow of the game. (Bah. Species survival, Species smervival)

Spoiler #4 (winner gets an SPF50 Academy fishing shirt. Navy). Another Shan quote before Tribal when deciding who to vote out and considering a JD vote “I don’t want to be the season villain, but (ominous humming) but I do want to be an assassin”. So, reader, one guess as to how her JD vote went. (More ominous humming, this time the producers add her tune to the background soundtrack - a single muted flute lightly but pointedly dancing around).

Buzzard Island Basher Barry
Danger zone below when windy