LAST EDITED ON 04-16-17 AT 06:49 PM (EST)
The super spoilers for this week are late, but they are really really super. Tremendous. Hello, here I am again your, favorite red head (actually, the best kind, orange, everyone says so, even if the polls which only tell you false news donít agree), Chester Cheeto. The dis-agreers are wrong, and they are fired! They are wrong, and false, and no one should pay any attention to them. Those that agree with me should get the Pulitzer for tremendous reporting by really tremendous news people.
Anyway, I am late because Crooked Hilary was at it again this week, this time she stole my Easter eggs before I could find them, and it took me several days to find where she rehid them. And my favorite, the plastic ones with cool toy inside? She stole them too. Yeah. And kept them for herself. Probably gave them to Cheating Chelsea, and Billy Goat Bill. But I know how to get even with them. I am practicing dropping the biggest bomb the US Air Force has, the Mother of All Bombs, on Muslims. Unfortunately since Iím keeping all of those filthy murdering people (and the Mexicans too, they're all filthy murdering thieves) out of the US (maybe I should let a few of them in, just for target practice?) I have to go way away (sorta forgot exactly where, but itís where a bunch of Muslims are. In their caves somewhere) and drop it there. Then, Crooked Hil, you better watch out. Especially if you happen to find yourself in under the flight path of the odd B1, or B2, and hear a whistling sound. Thatíll be the last time you steal my Easter eggs.
But I am back, bitches, and here are the latest and greatest.
Mother Of All Spoiler Bombs #1; Biggest headline this week, Varner outed Zeke as a Transgender. OK, a really bad move which has been widely condemned, and I join in on the condemnation. However, as is my wont, I will take the discussion in a different direction, and ask the burning questions that no one else dares to ask. Fasten your seatbelts, here goes;
In the previous season, Zeke claimed to be gay. If this is so, and it is also true that he self identifies and has transitioned to a life as a male, then he actually identifies as a gay man? Who was initially a female? Or was he just being deceptive (for understandably personal reasons) last season? I donít know, but I think we should take him at his word.
Zeke really made a hard to understand choice to do all that when, as a born female he could have just had a straight life as a straight female. But he preferred to transform to a male and live a gay male life. As I understand it, the transitioning process is a tough road to hoe. And to do it to transform oneself from a straight woman to a gay male seems counterintuitive, and somewhat counterproductive.
But thatís his choice, and he, like you and I, deserves to live and be happy and comfortable with his self-identity and be attracted to whomever he wishes. Still it seems like a lot of trouble, and then to put oneself in a position to be outed and embarrassed to the world on national TV.
I would imagine that even within the LGBT community, the sub-grouping of transgender people that become the gay version of the newly transitioned sex has to be a pretty small group. I had never heard of that before.
I guess I still have a lot to learn.
More power to Zeke, I'm all for everybody being able to live a life that seems normal to them without being marginalized. And this idle observation does nothing to take away the venality of Varner's actions. But I have to admit that I am puzzled by the choices Zeke made.
Mother Of All Spoiler Bombs #2; Debbie returns from her cuddle (shudder) session with Cochran on Exile Island. And she declared that what happens on Exile Island yada yada yada. So, the question is, knowing crazy Debbie blabby nature, is it a question of minutes before she spills, or hours? My money is on seconds.
Mother Of All Spoiler Bombs #3; Caleb back at the Ponderosa is pissed that he didnít get to bond with Debbie on Exile Island. She is physically a female Tai, his best boy, and the attraction for him is not to be denied. She is his female Gollum.
Mother Of All Spoiler Bombs #4; If looks could kill, there would be some mortal wounds inflicted at the last TC by Ozzy. Mr. Dead Eyes himself.
Mother Of All Spoiler Bombs #5; Varner may have dug a hole impossible to escape from with that gaping maw he calls a mouth and that big booger between his ears he calls a brain, but he did a game strategic favor for Zeke. Itís going to be very difficult for his tribemates to work up a plan to evict him anytime soon. But, ultimately, Varner also made it nearly impossible for Zeke to win because no one will want to be at final TC next to him. Theyíll gut him like a certain little baby goat before they let that happen.
Mother of All Siggie Bombs, Tribal style.