(First let me stop laughing at Jo-Lo’s super ass)
(OK, I'm done).
We are here, my fellow Americans, and all the ships at sea, to receive the blessings of your spoiler and savior, me ToTangGondolwattleChanLoMan, also known as the best dam sourced spoiler provider in the whole cotton picking world. That sounds like bragging, and in fact it is, but when you got the goods, you got the right to brag. You can also call me Bond, James Bond. That’s not my name, so if you actually want me to respond, make it Bill. Or ToTangGondolwattleChanLoMan, either will do.
As I sit here in my easy chair, sipping on an afternoon aperitif (actually, a pitcher of aperitifs. OK, if you insist on technical accuracy, a vat of aperitifs), I ponder the title to my latest Rock and Roll song, “Bring on the Raunch”. Is it not perfection? It will be included on my album (currently in post-production), “Raunch and Roll Will Never Die”. I play the pivotal melody on the Jaw Harp in the background. (Boing Boing Boing-a-Boing. Catchy little ear worm that, right?)
But enough about me. (What? You want more? You say you can’t get enough? Never fear, there’s always more. Just tune in next week for the continuing adventures of “ToTangGondolwattleChanLoMan”, man of leisure and
pizza spoilers supreme). Now it's on with the business of show business.
The inspirations for my poetic and musical musings are (as we all know by now) the esteemed all girl squad of Raunchettes, graduates of my Really Really Raunchy Girls Finishing School of Pie in the Face Comedy and Punch in the Puss Burlesque. They are still out on the Professional Chocolate Wrestling Tour, but they send me a card once in a while, and that’s nice (Here I go, getting all teary again. I promised myself that I wouldn’t, but here I go again).
Supreme Pizza Spoiler #1; The Chicken lives another week. It persisted in pecking that prone and pruney yet puckish prick of his pal persistently, but Tai’s pecker wasn’t pecked off so he was not persuaded to put the pullet in a pie.
Supreme Pizza Spoiler #2; Jason brought tears to his fellow tribemates eyes when he related the heart wrenching story of his autistic daughter, and the sacrifices he and his wife have made to provide the best medical help for her. With tears streaming down his cheeks, he tells them that all of the money he and his wife make go to helping his child learn to cope with her condition. All the money, that is except for the bare essentials of life, rent, electricity, basic food items, and tattoos.
Supreme Pizza Spoiler #3; A hitherto unknown tribe mate named Cydney joined the tribe this week.
Supreme Pizza Spoiler #4; The Island Monkeys decided that this group of losers didn’t deserve to have feces thrown at them. They are saving their feces for more a deserving group.
Supreme Pizza Spoiler #5; Michele and Nick are first timers at TC. And Nick is a last timer. He confesses that he should have been more arrogant, sooner.
Nick is weird. He recognizes that he is arrogant, but he’s proud of it. So he had no chance to win.
Supreme Pizza Spoiler #6; The look on Nick’s face as the votes were being read. (This deserves to be a special recognition ‘Supreme Blindside Spoiler’).
Supreme Pizza Spoiler #6; The girls are strong (BTW, Joe is a trans-girl). They picked off an arrogant challenge threat, and it seems as if Jason is next up. But now that he’s been warned that he is in danger, he’ll play his HI and Scot will use his size 17 feet to walk the plank. You heard it here first.
Tribe wanted to feed this sig to his pet piranha, but I saved it. My new nickname is 'Stubby".