LAST EDITED ON 11-01-12 AT 09:43 PM (EST)
Hello. Back again with the newest and the bluest from Survivor Island, where the spoilers come ready spoiled. So spoiled that the buzzards have been circling for weeks. In fact, we had to shoo them off when an unidentified Hantz tried to sneak back on the island. He still doesn't clean up very well, and he's claiming he won this season too.
Anyway, this week the adorable yet cutely deplorable raunchy ladies from the finishing school for really very Raunchy girls have been painting their unclothed bodies in camo and sneaking thru the jungle to get the latest and greatest spoilers just for you, dear readers, and here they are.
Spoiler #1: A black sharpie exploded in the pocket of Probst’s blue fishing shirt. It is now his black fishing shirt. Probably the only way he could be made to vary his wardrobe.
Spoiler #2: Penner will admit that he realizes what his problem on the island is. But not surprisingly, it’s not what he thinks it is. Somehow he never catches on that his problem is his ego. And his irritatingly condescending tone of voice.
Spoiler #3: Just wait a Tandang moment, what is a Dangrayne?
Spoiler #4: Abi Maria (great name, BTW) just can’t seem to go a whole show without being a bitch. She almost made it this time, but couldn't get thru Tribal at the end. Oh well, those crazy Hispanics.
Spoiler #5: Mike "Firefaller” Skupin experiences an epiphany. “I made it to the merge without anything worse than a few bumps, scrapes, and a lost appendage or two. And it feels good! I'm not a burnt offering. Yet. How novel!”
Oops, he’s walking by the fire again…
Spoiler #6: Penner reveals his secret stash spot. His ass crack. Mama Lisa isn't likely to hang that out to dry, although Jeff does have something like that in mind.
Spoiler #7: It will be revealed that there has been another celebrity on the island all along when Artis admits that he was in Pulp Fiction.
Spoiler #8: RC, after weeks on the island, still not skanky. Still a visual pleasure either coming or going. What were they thinking?
Spoiler #9: Denise finally wins Immunity. Damn, she says, this is more fun than
##### (oops, I mean) mud wrestling Lisa.
Spoiler #10: Kent reveals that Survivor is a lot like catching a bean ball in the ear. On his good days he remembers things like that.
Spoiler #11: Pete is gay. Which is OK, but what is strange is that he is a gay with no sense of the fabulous. Anyone that cannot appreciate the Island delight that is RC, either as previously mentioned, coming or going, or even just sitting there, is not an appreciator of the female sex. Definitely gay.
Tribe snapped his fingers, and this sig appeared. Cool, huh!