Previously, Colin and Christy are dragged into a criminal dispute because of refusal to pay a cabbie. Pretty much everybody is arguing about money and how it should be spent and saved. And the twin girls came in last but weren’t eliminated so they ended up saying buy-buy (pun intended) to their money. Estee ( http://community.realitytvworld.com/boards/DCForumID54/585.shtml ) wrote a good summary and you should read it to get caught up.

Now we get the opening theme for the show. You know the theme. It isn’t as bad as the Big Brother theme but it isn’t Survivor. It would be cool if they actually re-recorded the theme every season to reflect the new season, but Emmy winning shows don’t need to do that, I guess.

After a commercial break which I’ll spare you the details of, we come back to recrapping. But this is subtle recrapping. It isn’t in black and white the way a certain show is like. What were they recrapping? They had to show the twins giving up their money and not getting any more. Meh.

Well, the new parts of this episode started now. Thank god. I don’t think I could take anymore recrap filler. I get enough of that from that other show. The teams (except the twins) get $55 and everybody has to go into the city, Dubai, to find the clue. The teams talk and say nothing. Chip and Kim thank SeeBS for the honeymoon that they never had the chance to get. (What they’re actually appreciative?) The Bowling Moms yip about how they aren’t much of a threat. Whatever. I guess they needed to get some filler for this show.

Anyway, off to the city the teams go. They have to go to a landmark, Wild Wadi, that doesn’t open right away, so of course, like any episode of TAR, we have the mandatory bunching. It turns out that is just a really big waterslide.

Oh, but remembering the non-elimination twist, we have to go back to those twins. They offered to sing songs and there were no takers. They then decided to use the sexual gifts that God gave them (I bet God was really proud). They offered massages (not going there – trying to play naïve here). Anyway, they managed to charm the pants off a cute guy (well, not literally – thank goodness). He gave them money and led them to the landmark. Gee, that was tough.

Back to the waterslide. They have to go down it. Brandon and Nicole are first and get the clue that says go to Kolkata. They are supposed to drive. Chip and Kim are next and being brilliant, they take a cab. The Bowling Moms are next and in their infinite wisdom leave on of their bags there – the one with the passports. Colin and Christy and the twins follow without much incidence.

With such ineptness becoming obvious, it seems like a good time for a commercial break. I disagree. For that reason, I won’t tell you about the commercials that I watch.

Anyway, Chip and Kim who are taking a cab to airport reread the clue and go back to the waterslide. And the Bowling Moms go back too because of the lack of a bag. The Bowling Moms find a cabbie and ask for help in the directions to the airport. He said that he was on the way there so the Bowling Moms decide to follow him. They get out and were going to give the cabbie a $5 tip just for being kind enough to lead them in the right direction. The cabbie, though, turned on his meter and said that the women owed him $41. In an overwhelming feeling of déjà vu (to last week’s episode) security gets involved and want to take them to the security office.

With the “drama” heightening, why not have another commercial break, eh? Because I said so.

So we are back to see if the Bowling Moms will handle the situation better than Colin and Christy. Well, $41 turned out to be only $15 US, so the moms paid and walked away. Remember, they were going to give $5 anyways so it was only $10 more than what they wanted.

Ok, so everybody is in the airport getting tickets. There isn’t much to note. Everybody but Chip and Kim got on the same flight. Chip and Kim’s flight was 10 min slower but they were hoping for the best. My bet, with the idiotic things that were already happening, I don’t think that Chip and Kim needed to worry that much.

So with the cute world map graphic, we land in Kolkata, India. They take orange cabs to the next clue in a brick factory. Of note, we discover (again) that Christy is the reasonable person and Colin is an @$$. As they drive through the slums of India, Colin said he loves seeing the human culture. Christy said that he shouldn’t make fun of them.

Before the teams hit the brick factory, they are given the choice to use the Yield (a still yet to be used twist) and the second (and last) Fast Forward. The Yield was explained to us for the second time this season (the first being the premier) and was not used by anybody. They might’ve mentioned this because it might be used next week or the week after. This is something to stew over in Spoilers. Now for the Fast Forward, nobody really considers using it and everybody heads over to the brick factory.

Roadblock time! One from each team must make 20 bricks according to a certain standard (like the bricks cannot fall apart and can’t be missing something like a corner). Chip (of Chip and Kim) and Karen (of the Bowling Moms) are doing decently. Colin (of Colin and Christy) is getting frustrated and is yelling and throwing his arms around, but is steadily getting his bricks made. Kami (of the twins) sucks. It took her 45 min to make 2 bricks. And Brandon (of Brandon and Nicole) really sucks. He sucks so bad that they decide to go see if they can do the Fast Forward.

Well, we head over to the teams that actually aren’t sucking at brick making. They got their clues and have to go to a train station and take a trip. The Bowling Moms (with Cabgate II) spent all their Rupees and the train station doesn’t take Americos. This forces the women to back track to a bank to convert their money. In an attempt to hurry things up, they just switch money with the cabbie. Chip and Kim, the Bowling Moms, and Colin and Christy do get on the train with some “pleasant” groping experiences.

Back to the brickyard, we see that Kami is starting to get on a roll and is actually making bricks now. She must’ve figured out the way to make these things. So the twins get out and go to the train station, too.

And who could forget the God Squad (a.k.a. Brandon and Nicole)? Remember how Brandon really sucked at brick building so they decided to do the Fast Forward? Well, it turns out that they have to do a task before they get that Fast Forward. According to Hindu culture, everybody (including the women) shaves their heads bald at least once in their life. So guess what the task is supposed to be. Will the two go for it (remembering that they are also models)?

Tune in after the commercial break. Can’t wait? Neither can I.

We come back and I’m sure God is impressed with them. Hair is the soul for Brandon. I could make comments about that but I’m sure God has his plans. Because these two are models and their hair is worth so much to them, they decide not to do the Fast Forward and have to head back to the brick factory. (Hey, it wouldn’t surprise me if God decided to test these two and give them a curable cancer that still would require chemotherapy. That would make up for the hair is my soul comment.)

Well, we had enough of these losers so we need to go to the other teams. Hey, it’s Detour time! The choices are “Light but Long” which consists of finding a flower store, getting a ring of flowers and then releasing it down the river (an option that none of the teams chose) or “Heavy but Short” which consists of pushing a taxicab a short distance. While this is happening, Chip and Kim are ego-feeding Colin so he puts himself on such a high pedestal that he’ll make a dumb mistake and fall harder.

Over to the God Squad again, and we see that Brandon is able to make bricks. He figured that it was because nobody was there to put pressure on him.

We have to go back to that Detour now. Chip and Kim get the locals to help push while Chip steers. Yep, Kim is still pushing is a little bit annoyed. Chip said he’ll make it up to her. I’m not sure what that means. I’m not sure that I want to know what that means. Colin and Christy also get locals to push. These teams get their clue and find out that they get to go to the Pitstop. The Pitstop is located at the Victoria Memorial (named after Queen Victoria for the British influence in India).

Well, with positive things happening in this episode, we have to turn to the negative. Brandon and Nicole are in the train station and getting stared at and Nicole feels uncomfortable. I think this is funny because I thought that model would be comfortable with being stared at, but what do I know?

What I do know is that commercial breaks are lame so I’ll, once again, spare you the details.

We come back and show another shot of Brandon and Nicole on the train. I let out a big yawn. I think SeeBS saw my yawn and went back to the detour. The Bowling Moms and the twins get the locals to push the cabs and learn to go to the Pitstop.

And Chip and Kim and Colin and Christy are almost to the Pitstop and run to the line. Colin and Christy come in first and win a trip to Mexico with Chip and Kim coming in a close second. At the Pitstop, a local places bindis (at least I think that’s what it was) on the foreheads of the team members. Bowling Moms come in third and the twins come in fourth. The twins are just happy to still be in the race. I have to admit that they didn’t do as badly as I thought they would without money.

Back to the losers. Brandon and Nicole do the detour and, like all the other teams, get the locals to push the cab for them. These two weren’t expecting a head shaving challenge and they weren’t expecting to wuss out so much either. They arrive at the Pitstop (at night, might I add) to hear the bad news. Phil, who isn’t Phil from Heck, does not banish them to Heck for minor infractions (wouldn’t it be cool if he could?) but instead tells them that this is yet another non-elimination round. I can’t believe it! Two non-elimination rounds in a row! Yuck. And this was only three out of four eliminations so there is still one more to be had. Brandon and Nicole hand over their money and tell us that the Lord wants them in the game and that they are really excited. Somehow, I think that God has more important things to do, like look after Adria since Natalie has already been voted out of the Big Brother house or look after all those Olympians. Meh. If I got on a reality TV show, I wouldn’t get God involved in the game (even though I am Christian). I don’t think anybody else should either, but that’s just my opinion.

Well, after one last commercial break, we get a commercial for next week’s episode. I’ll tell you about next week’s episode. The twins have airport problems. Christy wants some R-E-S-P-E-C-T. And these guys get the ride of their life (again). Tune in next week and read Esbea’s summary.

Three is the perfect number.