Every week I’ve benefited from many of you spending time to write insightful SOTS and discuss what’s going on with the show. How do I ever give back? I’m posting a column that we’re lucky enough to get in Phoenix AZ – a local writer does a great job recapping the episodes each week. This is from today’s paper (12/7) bringing everyone up to date for tonight’s show. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Written by Suzanne Condie Lambert.
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“Trio can’t keep that loving feeling”

Last week on Survivor: Cook Islands: There is no way the Survivor “One Night in Heaven” prom committee – Candice, Adam and Parvati – is going to invite Jonathan to the after-party. Candice can’t believe the Aitu people won’t do what she says – don’t they know she’s pretty? And Yul continues to prove why he’s probably the best player this game has ever seen, captaining an alliance that is probably the most likable the game has ever seen.

Candice, Parvati and Adam are furious with Jonathan for turning on them before they could do the same to him. Jonathan explains about Yul and the immunity idol and the concept of logic. Parvati: Yul doesn’t have the idol. Jonathan: Yeah, he does, I saw it. Adam: Hubba wha?

Judging from the strenuousness of his double-take, it’s a good bet Adam was raised by cartoon dogs.

Twenty-eight days into the game, Sundra shows Parvati how to gut a fish. Parvati is fascinated. She previously thought cooked fish grew on her plate.

The reward challenge: the biannual food auction! Yay! Each player gets $500 and a chance to bid on things seen and unseen. Jonathan buys a hot dog and a pizza. Ozzy gets all-he-can-eat ice cream. Sundra wins the challenge zonker – a sea cucumber. Parvati gets a bath and a piece of cake. And Yul and Becky combine their cash to buy “power,” which turns out to be the chance to send another player to Exile Island and keep his/her remaining money. Buh-bye, Candice. Candice is sad.

Jonathan burps and gloats. Team Aitu is not well-pleased. Adam and Parvati think this is their opportunity to shift the game. They approach Sundra and Becky about voting Jonathan out.

The immunity challenge: We’ve long imagined that if one were to take an X-ray of Adam’s brain, one would see a toy back-flipping monkey. Imagine our surprise when he wins a challenge that combines simple math and long-term recall. Huh. Probably a copier-sales thing.

Back at camp: Candice, Adam and Parvati, having convinced themselves that they are the victims of a galactic injustice, tell Yul that if Aitu doesn’t vote Jonathan out before it sends them home, they will hold Yul personally responsible at the final vote. Yul quietly explains how Jonathan may not always be likeable, but he is a rational, self-interested player, and therefore a predictable ally. Yul might as well have been explaining string theory to a ballpoint pen.

Candice, whose emotional development apparently peaked in the sixth grade, gets hysterically offended. She screams at Jonathan that even his own alliance hates him. She tells Jonathan that Yul called him selfish. Selfish. Self-interested. Eh. In Candice’s head, there is room for only so many words that start with the letters “S-E-L-F.”

Adam, Parvati and Candice snuggle in the shelter. Jonathan catches fish. Adam, Parvati and Candice snuggle in the shelter. The rest of the tribe prepares the fish. Adam, Parvati and Candice snuggle in the shelter. Jonathan wonders aloud if they have to feed people who haven’t worked; the rest of the tribe shrugs and eats. Adam, Parvati and Candice suddenly realize that dinner is being had without them. There is more hilarious indignancy.

Tribal council: Adam, Candice and Parvati trot out their “They didn’t feed us” grievance for the benefit of the jury. Despite the Raro alliance’s threats, Aitu sticks with Jonathan. Candice goes home. Adam stands up and gives her a lingering, stomach-churning kiss.

Jeff Probst extinguishes Candice’s torch and says, “A kiss is nice. … Maybe if it were love he would have given you the immunity necklace.” Oh, snap!

Coming up: Parvati is injured. We’re guessing Adam didn’t wait an hour after Candice’s torch went cold before he started sucking Parvi’s fingers, and the strain was just too much for her delicate hands to bear.

WatMan