Kircon sits down on the couch after a long day of life to watch her favorite reality show Survivor. I want to escape into the Survivor game. I want to get away from all the violence of the world, the school and church shootings. I don’t want to be an adult anymore.

What’s that noise I hear? It sounds like the film has slipped in a projector. I remember that from my grade school days. *zip/zip/zip/zip* Ah to be a child again. Just to play all day would be wonderful.

What is that sound? I can’t make it out. It sounds like Jeff. What is he asking? Why are you wearing all green and that funny hat? Why is there a rainbow coming out of that pot you are holding? What are you saying?

*Jeff Probst speaks with a munchkin’s voice*

In the highlands of Brazil, two tough tribes Timbira & Jalapao fight against each other to win rewards and the opportunity to stay three more days. The winning tribe from each reward challenge must send someone from the losing tribe to Exile Island. EPMB came up with a new twist knowing someone would take advantage of this opportunity. Each exile chosen will pick someone from the winning tribe to join them. Jalapao, the only winning tribe, sent Timbira’s Brendan twice and Sierra once. Taj was chosen all three times but has told Stephen about their plans. These four have formed a cross-tribal alliance. Brendan has found the hidden immunity Idol. Taj knows where it is.

With the tribes dead even at six each it’s anyone’s game.
Twelve are left. Who will be voted out tonight?
AhhhhhhhOOOOOOOOO

*zip/zip/zip/zip*
Kircon, come join us for some games in Survivorland. How do I do that Jeff? The names McJiffy the leprechaun and I’ll send my helper Mortworth.

*tinkle* *tinkle* *thud*
Greetings kircon! Mortworth the Tooth Fairy, Esquire
*he touches my head*
*poof*

A Day in Survivorland with the Red Rover Alliance

Where am I? Why have I shrunk? Wait, I’m 6 again. I’m a kid.
*I spin in a circle like a top*

Taj and Stevie run past me to the tree mail spot. Taj screams; keep up with us kirkie. I’m going to find the Hidden Immunity Idol to make everything complete. We will make it to the merge and then we got it. It’s smooth sailing to the Sea of Ice Cream Floats. Then all I have to do is wade through the Swamp of Molasses and its Home Sweet Home! BruuHAHAHAHA

Where is that Taj, I ask? Why that’s the end of the game Silly. Everyone knows that. Everyone has played Survivorland. Help me look around Tree Mail while Stevie watches out. Something about turning a frown upside down. Is that the Brownie Song I ask?
Wait; screams Taj. I found it! I found it! Where can I hide it?
*Taj runs to Stevie*
I found it! Stevie will you put it in your pocket for me. Always protect yourself. Don’t let it show. Always keep track of it. They won’t suspect you. Grab the bottles and let’s get back.

Stephen tells me on the way back; it’s in my possession, I’m the one wearing the idol around my neck.

*tinkle* *tinkle* *thud*
*poof*
Let’s meet the other side kirkie.

Timbira Day 13

Welcome kircon to our Timbira Camp we’re going to do our morning chores. We get shells to put on our torches when we do. Coachie hands them out to us. We like to do what Coachie says. As Coachie stretches and grins everyone else shakes their heads no at me. Debbie asks if Brendan is coming. I’m going to get the fire going. Sierra ask if they need her help. Debbie yells; we got it, you rest. *they head down to the river*

*Sierra grabs my arm* Kircon, you wouldn’t believe what Brendan did to me. What, I ask? Dude, he didn’t tell me I was part of a kickin cross-tribe alliance. I know where the HII is. Thanks Dude, but next time I’m going to kill ya Brendan. He states to her; but Sierra, this is going to take us to the final 4. She shakes her head, that’s sick, just sick. We just keep getting stronger. We rule. I’ve made some great alliances. It’s brilliant! We’re going to take over the whole world.

Reward Challenge

McJiffy calls: Meet me at the Peppermint Stick Forest. We are going to have fun today.
Everyone gathers on two mats. I stand with Mortworth on the side. McJiffy calls out: Guess who was voted out? It was Sandy. Don’t you love my new hat? Of course you do. Well, let me tell you about today’s Reward Challenge.

It will be run in four rounds. Eight lucky children will get to ride on a spinning top. All you have to do is hang on. The other four children race to the string then pull it to the other side to spin the top. Once the top stops spinning, stand up. That’s easy enough but you will be dizzy. Then all you have to do is walk across a long balance beam without falling off and race to cross the finish line. Do that three times and you win reward.
Sound like fun? *cheers*

Do you want to know what you are playing for?
The winners’ will be taken to Charmin Café. *cheers*
One of the softest places out here. *more cheers*
Where all the sweets and pastries you want will be offered. *OoooooAaaahhhh*
Coffee! Sierra screams and falls down.
You want to know the best part. Yes? Yes?
There is a flush toilet with squeezably soft paper. *cricket, cricket*
Worth playing for?

Yes, we love you McJiffy!

I turn to see Mortworth and ask; Why are you here?
You’ll see he tells me.

First up; shouts McJiffy. Taj will ride the spinning top while Joey pulls the string.
Brendan will pull the string while Tyson sits on the top.
Go! Shouts McJiffy
Taj gets off the top first and falls over. WOAH! *giggle* she stands up wobbles to the left, to the right...
Meanwhile Tyson stands at the beam and shakes his head. He looks down, steps on and concentrates on each step.
Taj falls off halfway through. McJiffy tells her she has to start over. She runs a wild circle to try to find the start. She looks over at Tyson and starts running. She falls off again.
Tyson nears the end of the beam then jumps off. He races to cross the finish line.

McJiffy raises an arm. Point 1 for Timbira.

Next up!
Stevie will pull Spencer on the top while Coachie will pull Erinn.
GO! *dropping arm*
Spencer wins easily and relates it to wearing beer goggles.
McJiffy shouts: 1 point for Jalapao, 1 point Timbira.

Next round: Brendan will pull Sierra, Joe will pull JT.

Mortworth jabs me in the ribs, Watch this kid.

JT is spinning while Sierra is flying. I’m glad her hands are strapped on.
JT is off first. He falls. He tosses something.

Mortworth walks toward him.

McJiffy ask if JT feels like it’s a bad Friday night.
Look at Sierra; she looks like a skinny Weeble. But she is making progress to the beam.
JT stands up and walks determinedly to the beam. He stops. He looks down.

*Wham!* Mortworth walks over and picks something up by JT’s feet.

JT steps up on the beam.

*Wham!* Mortworth walks over again and picks something up.

Sierra is half way across and falls off. Her team shouts; don’t worry, he’s not even on yet. This seems to wave a red flag in front of JT. He takes a breath, brushes his foot back and dust rises. He charges onto the beam and the next thing you know...

JT wins. 2 points Jalapao, 1 point Timbira. *squeals and cheers*

Next up is Debbie on the spinning top with Coachie pulling the string, while Stevie pulls the string with Sydney on the top.

McJiffy drops his arm and shouts; Go!
Debbie almost flies off. I think she had the most fun. She steps up to the bar. Throws her arms out like a gymnast and starts her slow walk.
Sydney falls off half way through, runs back, & starts over. She makes quick progress this time by running the entire length of the bar. She jumps off and runs into the arms of her teammates. They all jump up and down.

McJiffy shouts: Jalapao wins reward to the Charmin Café.
And now for the twist. Who do you want to send to Exile in the Gumdrop Mountains?
Stephen points to Brendan. McJiffy ask why Brendan is smiling. He replies; that’s evil to take someone from reward. Stevie, I choose you.
Ah gosh, why would you do that? Stevie chuckles.
They head off smiling.

Tyson pulls me over and ask if I can listen for alliance talk when I’m with Jalapao at the Charmin Café. He thinks Brendan is forming alliances with them.

Charmin Café

We took Rainbow Trail to the Crooked Old Peanut Brittle House. It is now called the Charmin Café. Most of the walls had fallen just leaving the roof. You would not believe all the sweets. There were two tables full of peanut butter cookies, muffins, cakes, peppermint sticks, fruit, honey, dates, sugar, sugar, sugar. After Taj had her first cup of coffee, she did all the talking. It kind of reminded me of McJiffy’s voice when I first got pulled in here. *Talk/talk/talk* *zip/zip/zip/zip*
The only thing I found out was that she would rather have sweets than fishing gear. There was also a flush toilet with Charmin TP, soap, and running water.

JT grabbed a piece of peanut brittle, took a bite and spit something out. Mortworth walked over, picked it up and put it in his little pink tooth-shaped purse. JT is very sleepy and would like to take a nap. He played hard and lost several teeth. As he walked toward the hammock he found something inside it. Guys, look what I found. Taj thinks they might be gift certificates. What and why would you say that?
They are letters from home. Everyone starts reading and crying. Joe is excited because his father said he was proud of him. JT told us his mom said she loved him. They all agree it is the icing on the cake.

Timbira Day 13

Tyson shares his worry about Brendan with Coachie and Debbie. They agree they can’t tell Sierra. Coachie tells them if they merge Brendan has the power and that would make us bystanders. I don’t want to sit out the game. Do you? Do you feel the breeze shift? A storm’s coming! They all look at the sky then head to their shelter. Under her breath Erinn mutters something about Coach being a fake and at the end he’ll tell us he’s an accountant from Nebraska.

Exile Island Day 14

*tinkle* *tinkle* *thud*
*poof*
Where are we now Mortworth? And why do you wear pink?

This is EPMB’s Science Lab, where he tests out different theories. We are actually located in the Gum Drop Mountains. And by the way real men wear pink. Kircon I am dressed as you see the tooth fairy. Pink tights, pink feather in my hair, pink wand, but the worst is this dang tutu. I keep dropping ashes on it from my cigar. But it’s not about me right now. Go check out EPMB’s new love, the Cross-Tribal Alliance.

Brendan and Stevie wave and call to me. Red Rover, Red Rover, send kircon right over. I run over and listen to them compare notes and make plans. Or should I say Brendan make plans. We have both idols. We are in a powerful spot. We have all our puzzle pieces, No one expects us. We are the Red Rover Alliance.

Stevie ask me to gather wood with him while Brendan starts the fire. You know kirkie, I just met Bren and don’t know him from a million granola bars. Why should I put my trust in a 4-way alliance? I have the idol around my neck. That means I’m safe. I can’t place my faith on the Red Rover Alliance.

Jalapao Day 15

Joey yells: Tree Mail! Everyone comes running.

Connecting with your tribe will keep you alive
Battling the others is part of the game.
The meek and the slow will lose one more
The Aggressive protect their flame.

JT shouts; it’s a game of catch. This was made just for me. This is my game. I can catch or throw anything. *Arggggh*
Spencer looks worried.

Immunity Challenge

McJiffy calls both teams to the playing field by the Gingerbread Plum Tree.
Stevie and Brendan join their tribes from Exile Island.

Ready to get to today’s Immunity Challenge.
Two members of each tribe will launch plums from the giant sling shot onto the course. Once released the rest of the tribe will try to catch the plum, black or red, it doesn’t matter. Just catch it in your nets without dropping them. The first tribe to catch 5 plums wins immunity.
Losing tribe goes to Tribal Council where someone will be voted out of the game.

The Launchers for Jalapao are Sydney and Stevie.
The Launchers for Timbira are Erinn and Debbie.

Guarding each other are:
Brendan and Taj
Coach and Joey
Spencer and Tyson
Sierra and JT

Survivors Ready? The first to 5 wins. *raises arm* Go!

Sydney connects with JT for the 1st point.

Next round! Three, two, one. Launch!

JT dives and catches a plum. He spits out something.
Mortworth again walks over and picks up something.
McJiffy shouts; another great catch JT.

Jalapao - 2, Timbira – Zip

This is exciting Mortworth.
You ain’t seen nothing yet kirkie. I earn my keep today.

During the next two rounds Brendan catches two plums. JT makes a diving catch.
You guessed it. Mortworth picks up another tooth.

Jalapao and Timbira are tied with 2 each.

Here we go! Three, two, one, Launch!
Next plum is in the air.
Taj keeps Brendan from catching a plum. JT starts to catch a plum but Sierra tackles him knocking him down and knocking out his last tooth.
JT snags another one for Jalapao.
Someone shouts, he’s lost a tooth, he’s lost a tooth. JT looks at the tooth in his hand. He uses his tongue to feel where it was. He stands up and again looks at the tooth and throws it. *Girls scream*
McJiffy walks over and asks; JT did you just throw your tooth away?
As he’s walking back to his spot me mutters, yea, let’s get on with the game.

McJiffy stops the game. Let’s find that tooth. Everyone look.
JT, You’re Going to Want That Tooth! It’s your last one.
JT walks back to his spot, spitting blood and saying; It doesn’t matter it’s only the back half of it. Brendan yells, here it is. JT, come get it. JT shakes his head no. McJiffy walks over and puts it in his pocket.

This is the first time in Survivor history that a point was scored losing a tooth. Jalapao leads 3 – 2
Next round. Ready! Three, two, one. Launch!

McJiffy is screaming; JT is on fire. He makes another catch. He is so awesome. Tyson catches a plum and keep Timbira alive.
Score Jalapao still leads at 4 – 3.

Tyson catches the next plum tying the score at 4 even.

McJiffy slows things down to remind everyone what is at stake.
Who ever scores the next point will win immunity.
Everyone ready?
Final Round! Three, two, one. Launch!
Tyson scores for Timbira, JT drops his plum. JT misses for Jalapao. *screams and hugs*
Timbira wins the Immunity challenge.

JT cusses at the water and hits it with his net. He stands up and throws his net. He storms off. He is not a happy boy.

McJiffy picks up the Immunity Idol and hands it to Debbie. Head back to camp and have a good night. Timbira walks back to camp.

JT, you almost single-handedly won that challenge. Instead you came up short. The only thing I have for you is your tooth. McJiffy walks over and places the tooth in JT’s hand. You got the afternoon to decide who to vote out. See you tonight.

Back at Jalapao Taj threw a temper tantrum. She leaves the group. Steven what do you think. Ah... ah... I think she’s worried. Spencer asks JT; who do you think should go? JT answers; You or Taj. Jalapao is a fractured mess.

Tribal Council

Kircon it’s been something. I have another job that shows lots of promise, some basketball tournament. I think my order said Sweet 16. Oh no! Not more pink. I just go where they tell me to. Kircon just remember to brush and floss. McJiffy will help you from here. He’s over there just starting to question the losers.

*tinkle* *tinkle* *thud* *POOF*

So how does that make you feel Spencer?

I’m worried McJiffy, I did awful in the challenge. I am so mad at myself.

Taj is this team still together or do you feel the effect of losing?

We feel the effect, but we look forward to winning the next challenge.
We all blew up when we first got back to camp...

*everyone looks at Taj*

...Well, I blew up, McJiffy!
*she glares at everyone*

Taj doesn’t that worry you that it will cost you the game?
Anything can cost you the game. An outburst, a look, not giving 100%. Anything. But I give 110% to this game.

Taj do you feel a target on your back because you’ve been to Exile Island three times.
Just this week I have. But I didn’t ask to go there.

Joey what do you think?
I have not heard her say the words: I do not have the Immunity Idol.

*Taj turns around and looks at Joey* Do you want me to say those words?

No, no, no. I’m just saying I have to believe that you are not lying. You haven’t slipped once.

McJiffy pokes more, so you trust her even though she still has not said those words.

*Taj turns around again & looks Joey in the eyes*
I do not have the Idol.
*she looks around* Does anyone else want me to say it?
*Stevie’s mouth is wide open in disbelief*
*Taj turns around, puts her head on her hand, raises her eyebrows a tiny bit, and smiles at McJiffy*

And That, is what it comes down to. *McJiffy pauses* Whether or not you believe what the people in you tribe are telling ya. Someone is going to find out the truth. It’s time to vote.

*One by One the Jalapao tribe walks to the voting booth*

I’ll go tally the votes.

McJiffy walks back in full leprechaun dress; green coat, black hat, cane, and of course the pot of gold votes.
*He sets the pot on the table*
If anyone has the Hidden Immunity Idol, now is the time to play it.

*Everyone turns and looks at Taj*
*she gives a look on her face that says; I told you I didn’t have the Idol*

Once the votes are read the decision is final. That person will be asked to leave Survivorland immediately. Game over.

I’ll read the votes: Spencer. Taj. Spencer. Spencer.
That’s 3 votes Spencer 1 vote Taj.

*he opens the next vote very slowly*

*he pauses*

Fifth person voted out of Survivor 18: Tocantins: Spencer! That’s four votes, that’s enough. Bring me your torch.

Spencer, the tribe has spoken.
*McJiffy raises his cane and extinguishes the flame*
It’s time for you to go.

McJiffy turns to the defeated tribe and challenges them.
You have lost two Immunity Challenges in a row, two tribe members in a row, but worst of all you’ve lost momentum.
Grab your torches and head back to camp.

McJiffy walks over and ask if I enjoyed my stay.
It was cool, I reply. I would stay if I had a chance at the million dollars
When the credits roll, you will be whisked back to your sofa.
But I’m not ready to go. I have a few questions. What is that sound?
*zip/zip/zip/zip*

*poof*

I’m back to real life.
So what did you think Mr. Kircon? It was ok. How bout dinner?
OK. I really liked it. It seemed like I was there with them. I stand up and walk into the kitchen. What do you want for dinner chicken or venison? I put my hand in my pocket. What is this? I pull my hand out and it’s a tooth. JT you’re going to want that tooth.

kircon

I love writing summaries. I love how an idea comes. I love how it flows out of me. I love how it all fits together. My inspiration for this story was an audio problem for the first 10 minutes of the show (*zip/zip/zip/zip*). Jeff’s green shirt (McJiffy), finding my 31 year old Candyland game board (Survivorland), a friend’s lost teeth (feel better W), and my hubby Mr k. Thanks for Mortworth’s name which came from trying to remember a clients name. It made me laugh then and it still makes me laugh. And my best inspiration comes from the Survivors themselves. I hope this took you away for a little while and gave you a laugh or two.

Come back in a couple of weeks for the next episode brought to you by Michael