Previously on Survivor, Suck Guy's inept, boredom crept and the audience slept.

We start off by seeing the losers from Suck Guy returning from Tribal Council.

Erin: This is one of the hardest things we had to do. We voted off Robb, but we found Jesus. He was hiding in the batcave the entire time.

Erin: I don't trust anyone, but my good friend Penny has told me to keep an eye on Shii Ann and Ken.   They have the devil in them and need to go.

Ken: I don't trust anyone, but my good friend Shii Ann has told me to keep an eye on Penny. She has the devil in her and needs to go.

Shii Ann: I don't trust anyone, but my good friend Ken has told me to keep an eye on Erin. She may be a drag queen and I need makeup tips.

Jake has found treemail.   Basically the tribes need to paint themselves a different color and show some personality.   If this was an immunity challenge, both tribes would be evenly matched since the only character to show any personality is Magilla the monkey.

Chewing gum has also found their paint.   Brian says that he has had some experience in body paint, but since this brand isn't edible, he'll have to wing it.

The tribes go bananas with their paint.   Brian paints his beard orange which makes him look like he had a feedbag filled with Cheetos attached to him.   Ted paints his entire head yellow which makes him look like a well fed extra from the Discovery Channel.   Helen went for the slimming and eversouseful camouflage warpaint look.

Both tribes meet up with Anal Probst in a big circle.   He congratulates them on surviving this long without any personality.   He says that the tribes will get to have a little "bonding" time.   What the tribes need to do is hook up with the person from the other tribe who has the same color.   Each pair needs to pick a basket filled with food and condoms and head off to a secluded part.   Two of the pairs will get some additional instructions from the Kama Sutra.

Here is how the people paired up...

Brian/Penny
Erin/Ted
Helen/Ken
Jake/Jan
Clay/Shii Ann

Hmmm....all the pairs were male/female. Coincidence?   I think not. Jan and Jake were even seen holding hands as they headed to their spot. I know that CBS is desperate for anything to make the ratings go up, but seeing those two go at it would be like watching two Shar Peis mating.

Brian and Penny are shown having their picnic on the beach.

Shii Ann cannot believe her luck.   Not only does she get to hang out with the hot guy from Chewing Gum, but she has found the bamboo ticket that will get her into the camp as well.

Ken cannot believe his luck.   Not only does he get to hang out with the hot chick from Chewing Gum, but he finds the bamboo ticket that will allow him to show off the love shack he has built for her.

Clay and Shii Ann get to snoop around Camp Chewing Gum.   Shii Ann is impressed with the cave and what they have done with all the monkey poop.

Helen is impressed with the love shack.   She was also impressed with the size of Ken's cock (or is that a hen?).
Time to get to know each other.
Ken: So, how are things at your tribe?

Helen: Helen Glover, Army Swim Instructor, 3259258, Sir!

Ken: That's great! How is the food situation?

Helen: Helen Glover, Army Swim Instructor, 3259258, Sir!
Ken: Wonderful! Is there any warmth in you at all or do you have to bask in the sun like a lizard every morning to get going?

Helen: Helen Glover, Army Swim Instructor, 3259258, Sir!

Meanwhile, back at Chewing Gum

Shii Ann: Oh my heck, you would not believe how bad my tribe sucks. Penny is hateful, Erin may have a schlong, Ken is going through donut withdrawal..

Clay: Tha..

Shii Ann:   Jake is my friend, and Penny is evil and we need to drive a stake through her heart. But I'm not supposed to tell you any of this.   You won't tell anyone, will you?

Back to the big circle of love.
Anal Probst needs to know how everything went.   Jake and Jan complained about not enough Viagra and duct tape.   Shii Ann loved Chewing Gum and Helen keeps spouting off her name, rank and serial number. Jeff said that the new tribes will now live together on one beach.
All: Yay! A merge

Jeff (under his breath): Morons!

The tribes get up and get to know each other.   In a four Kleenex moment, Shii Ann finally got to meet Brii Ann.  
  The tribes get to Chewing Gum and find food and booze.   The idiots have even come up with a name for their new tribe--Chewing Guy.   They all decide to take a bath together and Jan's blue paint won't come off.   She looks like Smurfette before she was put in the nursing home.

Shii Ann won't shut up.   She is talking to everyone about how bad her tribe is and how she cannot wait to jump ship.

Nightfall shows the Second Annual Michael Skupin Firediving Competition going on.   Next up, Jan Gentry. She's up. She's heading for the fire. Oh, she stumbled and misses the target.   That's going to cost her. The Swedish judge only gave her a 4.8.   I know Jan is disappointed right now.

Brian gets wasted.   He grabs his instrument and strums it for a while. He then grabs his guitar and plays it badly.   He realizes how bad he is and goes and throws up.

Shii Ann and Brii Ann have a little talk. Brii Ann wants Shii Ann to come over to Chewing Gum. Shii Ann is all for it, but does not want to betray Ken and Jake.  

Meanwhile, Ken confronts Shii Ann about where her loyalty lies.   Shii Ann confesses that she is on the fence.

Time for the immunity challenge.   Jeff walks over and takes the immunity idol from Clay. Jeff then says that the tribes will be competing for immunity.   Wait a minute, the survivors look confused. Jeff never said anything about a merge, he just said that they were living together.   The thud you just heard was Shii Ann's jaw hitting the ground.   Jeff explains that the tribes need to break out of jail by using things around their cell. They are all cuffed and need to retrieve keys.   Brian said that he has some experience with handcuffs, but since they are not fur lined, he'll have to wing it. To keep you from suffering, Chewing Gum wins immunity.

Off to tribal council.   Jeff is smug from his little rouse, but he still asks the same crap questions.   Before he allows the tribes to vote, he opens up the floor for debate and Shii Ann goes to town.

Shii Ann: This tribe sucks. Save me and vote out Penny. She is evil and must be destroyed.

In the end, Shii Ann is voted out.

Next on Survivor, Helen wants to spank the monkey and Ken feels that Clay needs to change his litter box.