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"Evil Soccer Moms..."
snoocharoo 1 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "American Cancer Society Spokesperson"
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05-12-03, 09:55 AM (EST)
 
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"Evil Soccer Moms..." |
Parents, I have to tell you that I am still shaking with anger and rage over a situation that occurred this past Saturday at my daughter's soccer game. My fuse is very short when it comes to people who are blatantly ignorant and uncaring, especially those people who treat their children like crap. I have one child, and my universe revolves around her. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't pray to have another baby but it isn't in the cards for me, so I am dedicated to raising the child I have to be the best person she can be. She is 10, and insecure, impressionable and just finding out who she is. This is a pivitol time in her development and I want her to feel positive about winning and losing, I want her to understand that she isn't always going to the best and we don't expect that, as long as she gives it her best Joe and I are proud of her. We had a soccer game at 8:00 am this past Saturday and my daughter's team was playing one of the best teams in the league, she was really nervous. The coach likes to give the girls the option of playing a different position just to see how they do. My daughter is forward and she is quite proficient in her position. We had talked and she told me she wanted to try goalie, and I encouraged her to give it shot. The game began and I sat in my folding chair next to 2 other moms (but far enough away so that I didn't have to talk to them). During the first half of the game Sheridan played her usual position of forward. These two biitches next to me were screaming at their daughters who are on Sheridan's team "WHAT"S THE MATTER WITH YOU ARE YOU STUPID?" "YOU SHOULDA HAD THAT SHOT" "GET IN THERE, KICK HER"...etc. I was appalled but it's not place to tell others how to treat their kids, so I kept my mouth shut and tried cheering on the girls with positive reinforcement. Second half of the game the coach puts Sheridan in as goalie. I cringed in my chair. She's never played goalie and isn't exactly the most aggressive player on the team, needless to say she was terrible. But that was fine with me because she tried something different and I'm proud of her for that. The two next to me started complaining because Sheridan was the goalie and missed blocking a shot, they said "C'MON COACH PUT SOMEONE IN WHO KNOWS HOW TO PLAY" "OMG, THIS GIRL IS HORRIBLE, WHO PUT HER IN AS GOALIE?" "SHE SHOULD'T EVEN BE PLAYING". Guys, I can't tell you how much will power it took to keep me from committing bloody murder. All I could do was sit there and try to be calm, I willed myself not to say anything. My DH and I are just beginning to become very involved with town politics and community causes, in no way do I want to jeopordize our reputation, especially over someone else's foolishness. The only comment I made was to the man on the other side of me. I looked at him and said "THAT is the reason parents kill each other at hockey games". Sheridan is completely crushed. She wants to quit soccer. The girls of these mothers were nasty and rude to Sheridan and now she is afraid that they are going to beat her up. I told her that she never has to play goalie again, but you know how it is with kids that age. Nothing I say can make her feel better. Later that day I phoned Sheridan's coach and talked to him about the situation. He said that Sheridan doesn't have to play goalie and he apologized for the treatment she recieved. I feel stupid for taking this so personally but damnit, I'm pissed. Don't people realize that this isn't World Cup, it's Naugatuck Youth Soccer for cryin outloud. Young girls have so much pressure on them as it is, what is wrong with these parents? Don't they realize the damage they are causing not only to their own childrens psyche but to others? Sorry for being a downer but I'm quite pissed and just needed to vent it.
"Believe in Yourself"
You too can cause forest fires...
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SurvivinDawg 6816 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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05-12-03, 10:10 AM (EST)
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2. "No new thing under the sun..." |
It's the same everywhere, and not just soccer.When I was in jr. high and high school, I helped keep stats for the Little League baseball teams. I'd sit in the radio booth with the announcer (small town, pop. 4000, Little League was the highlight of radio broadcasting  ) and keep the book and help "spot" for him. Well, we always had a better time watching the parents. They were yelling and screaming. The kids just wanted to play. One woman was so bad they called the police to escort her off. They banned her, but she kept coming back. Other parents abused the umps, the coaches, and each other's kids. The kids themselves were embarrassed, and probably just wished the grownups would go away. I don't know what to tell you otherwise, except this is an opportunity to teach your daughter a lesson in perservering through adversity.   
Contradictions don't exist. If you are faced with a contradiction, check your premises. You will find that one of them is wrong. -- Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged
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Spidey 6259 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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05-12-03, 10:21 AM (EST)
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4. "RE: No new thing under the sun..." |
I don't know what to tell you otherwise, except this is an opportunity to teach your daughter a lesson in perservering through adversity.Yeah, that and that MEAN.PEOPLE.SUCK! That is so horrible. And I am soo proud (and shocked!) you resisted the urge to rip their tongues out. I don't know that I could have. How would they feel if someone was saying things like that about THEIR daughters? Don't they realize that girl's mother might be sitting there? Poor Sheridan. ((HUGS)) for you both. My kid is only in tee ball and so far it's not too bad, since none of the kids really know what they are doing. But I can already tell who the psycho parents are going to be. Not looking forward to dealing with it. 
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DataShark 1395 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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05-12-03, 10:13 AM (EST)
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3. "RE: Evil Soccer Moms..." |
Nothing I can say can take away the rage you felt. I can tell you that I understand and sympathize.My youngest played soccer for one season many years ago. He wasn't very proficient but seemed to really enjoy himself. I was so proud of him for trying! One Saturday during a game one Mother on the other team was yelling at her child (I would call it berating!). My son got in the way of her daughter getting to the goal - she yells "He's nothin push him out of the way" Everyone looked at her I could not contain it and walked over into her face and told her that was my son she told her daughter to push. I have to say I admire you immensely for somehow not loosing it. I always want to reach out, wrap my arms around them & shield them from all the A@#holes in the world. I hope your Daughter realizes how silly (Dumb) adults can be - and it does not stop her. PS: Sound like your doing a great job!
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KScott 3265 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
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05-12-03, 10:24 AM (EST)
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5. "RE: Evil Soccer Moms..." |
Can't people hear what they sound like. How horrible for you and your darling child. I applaud you for keeping your cool, I don't know if I could have done that. If you would have said something to those "evil soccer moms" you could have made an already bad situation worse. I hope the coach steps up and says something to them. *hearts* to you.
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triednottowatch 281 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
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05-12-03, 10:37 AM (EST)
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6. "RE: Evil Soccer Moms..." |
Unfortunately, Data is right. And if you think it's bad at the games, you should see what goes on behind the scenes. I coached Little League from 1992 until 2001, and the last two of those years I was on the baseball board. There are a few coaches and commissioners who do everything they can to manipulate the draft and the All-Star selections. It is appalling to see these guys try to live their unrealized sports ambitions through their kids. I argued for kids that I would see get passed over for All-Stars year after year simply because their dad wasn't in the right clique or couldn't be a sponsor. It really crushes a kid when he bats .750 but doesn't make the All-Star team. I know, I coached a kid in exactly that situation. As a parent, it also makes me irritated to see the parents with the stick-on on the back window with a kid's name and number and the procalamation, "All-Star", mainly because I know so many of them don't do it to honor the child, but to say, "Look at me, I'm the parent of an All-Star."I'll admit my favorite year coaching was the year we won the league championship in our age group, but not just because we won the championship. It's because we did it with only two of the so-called "All Stars". Our boys learned to play to their potential, not to the label of the clique that runs the league year in and year out. And no, my son never even came close to being an All-Star. He just loved being with his buddies. We were just proud to win as a team, not becuse we had four All-stars and a bunch of other guys, which is how most of the other guys coach. Sorry such a long rant, but the whole state of kids' athletics gets under my skin. Especially since I know coaches who act like the two mothers in Snoochie's post. Sometimes I thought we should just have kids and coaches at the park and tell the parents the score later. (Quietly climbs off his soapbox)
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nailbone 27263 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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05-12-03, 11:55 AM (EST)
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21. "RE: Evil Soccer Moms..." |
>
>Next game I intend to talk
>with these ladies. I just
>need to know what to
>say and how to say
>it. I have no
>couth, I'm obnoxious and loud
>and can easily see myself
>laying into them, which is
>NOT the right way to
>handle this.
>
As much fun and stress-relieving as that would be, it's definitely NOT the way to handle it, especially if, as you said, you wanna keep a good name in the community and all that. What you need to do is talk to the coach and ask him to speak to "the parents" about things that are said to the kids while they're playing. That way YOU aren't singled out as the pot-stirrer, and THEY aren't singled out as the big-mouths.My son's first LL baseball team had some moms that would sit as close to home plate as possible and yell instructions to their kids as they batted. Nothing rude, just stuff like "choke up" and "move up/back/etc. in the batter's box". Finally, the coach came over IN A GAME and told them that he was the coach and they needed to let him coach. He said "we tell them certain things to do, and when to do them, and y'all are just getting them confused. We have a plan we want to follow, and since we can't tell you that plan, you'll just have to trust us." Then he told the boys to listen ONLY to him when they were on that field, and follow ONLY his instructions. Worked like a charm and the team play improved from that day on. Nobody got their feelings hurt, but the constant "bleacher coaching" stopped. Your coach could say basically the same thing, and either the betches will stop, or it'll be a lot more obvious and then he ore someone else could single them out and tell them to shut the fvck up! Either way, it won't need to be you.
>
>"Believe in Yourself"
>You too can cause forest fires...
>
This cracks me up everytime I read it! 
  
(c) 2003 IceCat Originals, Inc. All rights reserved.
Royal Liaison to Illicit Activities, SB Video Historian (StS)
- Except for ending slavery, fascism, Nazism, and communism, war never solved anything.
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mistofleas 8043 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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05-12-03, 10:51 AM (EST)
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9. "RE: Evil Soccer Moms..." |
Print this out and hand it out at the next game.
I'm so sorry that little snooch had to learn about the stupid things that adults do in this way. This is yet another reason why Mr.Fleas and I didn't have children. I know I couldn't have shown the restraint you did and I would be in jail on assault charges instead of reading the boards. I admire you and your child snooch. If need be you tell little snooch that auntie misto will come make sure those girls NEVER say anything bad to her again. I've got some ideas! 
--sends a hug to Sheridan and Snooch
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nailbone 27263 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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05-12-03, 11:19 AM (EST)
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13. "RE: Evil Soccer Moms..." |
And I bet these betches are fat and lazy and couldn't run from one end of the field to the other.Truly sad, snooch, and I admire that you didn't say anything. I probably would have at least said your "hockey parents" line loud enough for them to hear. We've been fortunate to live in a part of town that's pretty civil when it comes to stuff like this. I was at a LL baseball game before our's Saturday night, and the other team's shortstop made a great play and the team I was with applauded him. And in our game following it, when the opposing pitcher was taken out (ran out of innings, thank goodness) we all applauded him for a great effort. Of course, there are leagues in other parts of town where it's not so civil, and Lubbock even made national news (and Outside The Lines) due to a brawl at a youth football game). But for the most part the coaches are great and will squash anything like what you faced in a big hurry. And if the coach doesn't, the other team parents will. Whether it's your own kid or someone else's, you say nothing negative. And these parents, moms especially, would have no compunction to getting right up in you and telling you what's what and how kids OUGHT to be treated. Hugs to you and your punk kid, snooch. *smooch to Snooch*
(c) 2003 IceCat Originals, Inc. All rights reserved.
Royal Liaison to Illicit Activities, SB Video Historian (StS)
- Except for ending slavery, fascism, Nazism, and communism, war never solved anything.
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Bucky Katt 3146 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
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05-12-03, 12:25 PM (EST)
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24. "RE: Evil Soccer Moms..." |
I'm not sure how it works with the youth soccer in your area but to me it has always made sense in kid sports to have a competitive league and a fun league. Some kids want to win and enjoy playing against the best competition and for them a competitive league is best. In that environment, all bets are off and the coaches, parents and players should realize that things will be competitve.For most kids who are just there to socialize and have fun then a non-competitive league is best. In that environment, there should be absolutely no tolerance for parents who in any way criticize the coaches, players, officials etc. I think separating kids into those two areas works best. On a side note, have any other Canadians seen the Canadian Hockey Association commercials? For those who haven't seen them, they are quite hilarious as they show children berating parents in everyday life like parents berate their kids at their sporting activities. Here is a site that has them, they are the three "Canadian Hockey Association" commercials listed. http://www.hockey-humor.com/video.htm  "Nasty? How can you say that? I'm 8 pounds of total lovin'!"
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L82LIFE 5333 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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05-12-03, 12:41 PM (EST)
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25. "RE: Evil Soccer Moms..." |
Biages!When my son was in soccer, we got really lucky. All the parents were very mellow and in it for the fun. There was only one mom who was really hard on her daughter. Her daughter was the worst player on the team, and her mom would yell at her to pay attention, etc., but the kid just ignored her. We finally made it really clear to that mom that none of us were concerned about how well our kids did, we just wanted them to enjoy themselves. She finally let up, and ended up being pretty cool. We played a few teams that had a different view, though. At one point, this little boy got hit smack in the face with a ball. His parents and coach screamed at him to get up, he was fine. The parents from my son's team ended up going to check on the boy. It was pretty pathetic. My son's team was the least competitive, they had the most amount of fun, and they never treated each other badly for messing up in a game. Some might say that this isn't the way to win games. Wrong. His team ended up with the championship. 
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nailbone 27263 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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05-12-03, 02:40 PM (EST)
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30. "RE: Evil Soccer Moms..." |
> Some might say
>that this isn't the way
>to win games. Wrong.
> His team ended up
>with the championship.
>
Exactly! We've been on sports teams since the kids were 4, and the teams that have won championships, or come close anyway, were teams that focused on the fun and learning, rather than the competition and perfection. The only team that we had that won and had a harsh coach had a fun coach (me ) that offset his gruffness. And he wasn't trying to be mean or demeaning, he was just like I said, kinda gruff and loud to the girls. But he could also be fun, and he was a great technical coach. I had little technical knowledge, but I can be pretty silly sometimes , so we made a good team.
(c) 2003 IceCat Originals, Inc. All rights reserved.
Royal Liaison to Illicit Activities, SB Video Historian (StS)
- Except for ending slavery, fascism, Nazism, and communism, war never solved anything.
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wendyp 2081 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Roller Coaster Inaugurator"
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05-12-03, 04:55 PM (EST)
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31. "RE: Evil Soccer Moms..." |
Snooch I am proud of you for not saying anything. I think I would have said something.My DD is playing Tball she just turned 5 and is the youngest on her team, she is also the only girl on her team. There is one guy that helps the coaches that you can see just CHAPS his hide that there is a girl on his son's team. But she has held her own and even the parents and coaches have said stuff to us about how well she has done. If is funny how parents react....one game the pitcher of the other team got the ball and ran to tag Taylor and in the process shoved her down really hard. I stayed in my seat trying to be a good mom...the coaches handled it and the other team's coach got on to the player about it. (keep in mind if it was one of the boy I think this boy would have knocked them down too) This was the first game we played. She did not want to paly anymore. We encourage her to try again and she did. She loves to play and is having a great time! In a diffent game a boy swung to tag her with the ball in his hand rather then the glove. The look she gave him was priceless. She bravely walked off. One game I was behind the stands of the other team, chasing DS and DD was up. She hit it and when she was running to 2nd one of the moms was screaming get her knock her down. I so much wanted to get in her face and say That is my DD you are talking about! Baseball is not a contact sport! I did not, but really wanted too. I am a competitive person, but some people go over the top! Good luck Snooch and Tell little Snooch to hang in there and try again. 
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SaphireLady 2491 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Seventeen Magazine Model"
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05-13-03, 00:05 AM (EST)
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32. "There is" |
There is a contract that alot of leagues have gone to having parents sign. It states that parents will be respectful of the players and of the refs or umps and coaches. As for the parents, know that by being silent you upheld yourself in a respectable way. You might try to find a positive way to let all the parents know, say at a meeting for an after game party, and just casually mention the negative talk you have been hearing and how this is not good for our children in their young fragile state. I am sure you know the type of drill I am talking about. The only other thing that could be done is for the coach to have a parent chat with all the parents, so no one child is embaressed by or is the for their parents. Last, just remind, as many times as needed, your daughter that we all try things and miss up. That if she wants to do it again she will do better. That practice makes one better. And that we all make mistakes, including grownups with opening our mouths and saying things we shouldn't or did not mean to be taken in the way they were, etc.... And that you are sure, and I bet if they were confronted they would be, never meant to hurt her or the others they were yelling at or about, but that they got caught up in the moment and things came out that should not have. They are adults, and they were wrong, but I just have a feeling they never meant to hurt your daughter, you, or anyone else. They were unthinking and that is why a group reminder on the comments would probably work well. Just my .02$
"Now I will believe that there are unicorns..." William Shakespeare; "The Tempest"
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