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"LCs causing the problems?"
Redbud 573 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Reality Show Commentator"
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11-15-05, 11:18 AM (EST)
 
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"LCs causing the problems?" |
Watching IV prompt Allison to go into the kitchen to confront the girls and especially TJ made me angry yesterday. It is a growing trend I see that the LC give the women a behavior which is destined to cause confrontations or create situations. Allison may need to break her facade, but in doing so, why does she have to become confrontational? The fact is TJ was right - her point to Allison was they were fine with the kitchen and if Allison didn't like it, she'd just have to get over it. That's Allison's issue to work on. so how did it get turned into TJ being the bad guy? And who in the heck is Allison to be walking into the kitchen and TELLING them to clean it up "now"! As my kids sometimes say to each other "you're not the boss of me!!!" And Allison is not the boss of TJ and the others, so she has no business telling them to clean up the kitchen because she is not ok with it. which brings me back to my point - the LCs tell them be accountable to each other and that brings conflict between the women. Then they tell Allison to confront TJ, which brings more conflict. Are they trying to stir up what had been a boring house???
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snowflake2 1499 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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11-15-05, 12:21 PM (EST)
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1. "RE: LCs causing the problems?" |
I think the LC's have lost credibility AND have lost control of the house.They deliver all sorts of "contradictory" advice. Rhonda is hardly ever seen anymore...she just pops in now & again to deliver some carefully scripted lines to provide the sound bites for the previews to make us think something BIG is going to happen. I had to laugh today, because IV had one of those moments...where in the middle of complimenting Jill (in the loveseat) on her progress she issues the thundering statement...Don't you EVER con me again!!!!...I thought, geez, that was a little unnatural...maybe they had originally planned to use that little piece of acting as a snip in a preview...for some reason must have decided against it. The LC's have been allowing Allison to "really" run the house with her manipulations...talk about Christina running a con game. 
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Sharon_L 260 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
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11-15-05, 02:14 PM (EST)
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2. "RE: LCs causing the problems?" |
LAST EDITED ON 11-15-05 AT 02:21 PM (EST)>The LC's have been allowing Allison
>to "really" run the house
>with her manipulations...talk about Christina
>running a con game.
Allison does what she's told, even dresses as she's told. How does that equate to 'manipulation'? If anything, I think Allison is being bullied and for the most part, ignored by the hg's. If she had so much power why would they even attempt that prank they pulled on her yesterday? hmmmm....jealousy?
The so-called LC's are a problem but not the whole problem that SOH tanks in the morals and ethics department. I give the producers a thumbs down for allowing those two frauds to continue.
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snowflake2 1499 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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11-15-05, 02:33 PM (EST)
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3. "RE: LCs causing the problems?" |
I sincerely doubt there is a woman in that house who is jealous of Allison. Allison passively-aggressively runs the house with her ability to cry at the drop of a hat, to play the pity card, and to boomerang attention back to her in any situation. Why do you think the LC's have to conveniently keep her occupied with a sidetask when any other HG is about to have a moment? For example, her "dating coach" assignment had to coincide with Jill's birthday party. They knew if Allison was not kept occupied, it would have turned into all kinds of drama about Allison. She plays "fragile" to avoid hearing the faintest shred of truth. And as far as dressing like they tell her? Do you mean the (very) few hours she had to wear the muumuu and no makeup?? Yes, she couldn't even do that...still had lipgloss and mascara on. She reminds me as though she would still take an hour to carefully arrange no makeup-no-clothes-no hair look.
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AshLanie 895 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
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11-16-05, 07:29 AM (EST)
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5. "RE: LCs causing the problems?" |
Isn't YJ a counselor in real time? (own her own business)Thought she counseled handicap people? If I am right then she does have the training/experience to have done what she did.
aaaah But they did make TJ the bad guy......they all backed her til IV stepped in...then voila, they are now backing Alison.
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gracelove 15 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Got Milk? Spokesperson"
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11-16-05, 04:16 PM (EST)
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10. "RE: LCs causing the problems?" |
>
>
>aaaah But they did make TJ
>the bad guy......they all backed
>her til IV stepped in...then
>voila, they are now backing
>Alison.
>
>
>
Wait, you lost me. What do you mean by backed TJ? You mean by not doing the dishes?
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Redbud 573 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Reality Show Commentator"
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11-16-05, 09:28 AM (EST)
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7. "RE: LCs causing the problems?" |
LAST EDITED ON 11-16-05 AT 09:41 AM (EST)>Iyanla did not create this situation
>with the dishes, TJ did. No, TJ didn't create the situation in my opinion. Allison and IV did. TJ simply said she wasn't cleaning the kitchen. The others agreed also. Having a clean kitchen is Allison's issue. She's the one who got all upset and in near panic due to dirty dishes. How in the world is that TJ's problem? IV helped create the situation. First they told the HGs not to enable each other (which in this case would have been TJ cleaning the kitchen per Allison's request), and then by encouraging Allison to confront TJ. Allison is the one who insisted it be cleaned NOW. What right did she have to insist that TJ and the others clean the kitchen? Absolutely none, unless someone made her House Manager. >Iyanla showed Allison a way
>to address it. That is
>how life is. You never
>know who or what you
>are gonna get confronted by.
>So you deal with the
>situation. And instead of doing
>usual Allison mode, she had
>a chance to truly speak
>her mind. IV instigated that confrontation, and I feel Allison could of approached the HGs and made her feelings known without being a bit&h and demanding they clean it NOW. Even so, if Allison's true feelings were to say that everyone clean it NOW, she has no right to be demanding any of the HGs do anything. So TJ was correct to refuse to do it. My question is why was Allison encouraged to be confrontational, yet with TJ they discourage it. >TJ had a point, but TJ
>is not a life coach. Obviously she is not a LC, but she IS Allison's accountability partner. The LCs have continuously encouraged the women to support their partners and help them grow. TJ was doing (in her mind) what she had been told to do. Maybe it wasn't the best plan, but Allison's reaction seemed to me to confirm that TJ was right on target with everything she said. >And she is not in >a position to "create" a >situation like it is an >exercise. She does not have >the training or the experience >to do that. Part of
>her job is to listen >to Allison and her feedback.
>So if she knew Allison >understood the point but was
>angry, she could have called
>Rhonda and asked about a >better way to deal with
>it. The point is the
>kitchen needed to be cleaned.
>
TJ handled it the way TJ thought she should in trying to support Allison. Allison reacted strongly to there being dirty dishes in the kitchen. She was in a near panic over it. She was being forced to confront one of her issues. But she still has no right to insist the others clean it. My question is why didn't she clean it herself like she normally would? If IV told her not to, then IV knew where this would all lead and it was a growth exercise for Allison. As you mentioned, "in real life" people aren't going to do what you want. Insisting upon it isn't going to help you any. >And no one made TJ the
>"bad guy" but TJ... That's not true. Jessica jumped on TJ in the kitchen, and then she and Christina gossiped about her out in the yard. Did you see that part?
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gracelove 15 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Got Milk? Spokesperson"
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11-16-05, 05:32 PM (EST)
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11. "RE: LCs causing the problems?" |
>
>No, TJ didn't create the situation
>in my opinion. Allison and
>IV did. TJ simply said
>she wasn't cleaning the kitchen.
> The others agreed also.
>Having a clean kitchen is
>Allison's issue. She's the
>one who got all upset
>and in near panic due
>to dirty dishes. How
>in the world is that
>TJ's problem? IV helped
>create the situation. First they
>told the HGs not to
>enable each other (which in
>this case would have been
>TJ cleaning the kitchen per
>Allison's request), and then by
>encouraging Allison to confront TJ.
> Allison is the one
>who insisted it be cleaned
>NOW. What right did
>she have to insist that
>TJ and the others clean
>the kitchen? Absolutely none, unless
>someone made her House Manager.
>Let me ask you - how was not cleaning the kitchen supporting Alison? A dirty kitchen with flies in it needs to be cleaned. Enabling Alison would have been standing by while she cleaned the kitchen. There is nothing enabling about honoring her request IMO. Because normally she wouldn't have asked. She would have just cleaned it herself. But TJ decided to create an exercise of non-cleaning and she wanted the housemates to support her in that. That had nothing to do with Iyanla or Alison. This is what I mean by TJ not being a coach. There were flies in the kitchen. It was disgusting. No one would want a kitchen to stay like that. The reason it did is because TJ wanted to use that as an opportunity to do what she thought was supporting Alison. Had she been coached through this, she could have come up with a better solution, like telling Alison, you know what? Lisa made that mess and she needs to clean it. You may want to talk to her about that if you have an issue with the kitchen. Not enabling Alison doesn't mean living in a messing kitchen indefinately. How long were they all gonna let the kitchen stay like that?
>
>
>IV instigated that confrontation, and I
>feel Allison could of approached
>the HGs and made her
>feelings known without being a
>bit&h and demanding they clean
>it NOW. Even so,
>if Allison's true feelings were
>to say that everyone clean
>it NOW, she has no
>right to be demanding any
>of the HGs do anything.
> So TJ was correct
>to refuse to do it.
> My question is why
>was Allison encouraged to be
>confrontational, yet with TJ they
>discourage it.
But the point was at that stage, she was pissed. Iyanla did not instigate it, she asked Alison what she wants to do. What she coached Alsion on was not playing nice and not avoiding confrontation, especially after Jessica and TJ got into it. Keep in mind, no one had to clean the kitchen just cause Alison said it. To me it was not about was what Alison said right or wrong. It was about was what Alison said true to what she felt at that time. And if anyone in that house thought that was out of line, then TELL HER! To me that is what this is all about.
>>
>TJ handled it the way TJ
>thought she should in trying
>to support Allison. Allison
>reacted strongly to there being
>dirty dishes in the kitchen.
> She was in a
>near panic over it.
>She was being forced to
>confront one of her issues.
>But she still has no
>right to insist the others
>clean it. My question
>is why didn't she clean
>it herself like she normally
>would? If IV told her
>not to, then IV knew
>where this would all lead
>and it was a growth
>exercise for Allison. As you
>mentioned, "in real life" people
>aren't going to do what
>you want. Insisting upon
>it isn't going to help
>you any.
But the way TJ thought she should handle it didn't work. That's all. It just didn't work. If her ways worked, she would not be in the house in the first place. As I said above, Alison's expressed demand being "right or wrong" is not the issue. The only issue is expressing. That is the first thing Iyanla asked Alsion - did you tell TJ what you felt? That is what Alison is dealing with, not wigging out over a dirty kitchen. >
>>And no one made TJ the
>>"bad guy" but TJ...
>
>That's not true. Jessica jumped on
>TJ in the kitchen, and
>then she and Christina gossiped
>about her out in the
>yard. Did you see
>that part? Yes, I saw that part. At what point did any of them say TJ was a bad person? TJ is the one who said that on the phone with Rhonda. Jessica questioned TJ's exercise and then she and Christina gossiped about what she did - which they don't need to be doing anyway. So how does that make TJ bad?
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rookwood 350 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Cooking Show Host"
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11-16-05, 12:05 PM (EST)
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8. "RE: LCs causing the problems?" |
LAST EDITED ON 11-16-05 AT 12:10 PM (EST)>Iyanla did not create this situation
>with the dishes, TJ did.
>Iyanla showed Allison a way
>to address it. IV and Rhonda both told Allison to STOP CLEANING UP AFTER EVERYONE. She blatantly refused to keep to that. TJ, her Accountability Partner, attempted to keep her accountable that day. Allison immediately fought back, sicced IV on TJ, and the whole house turned again against TJ - the only person in the house who is actually TRYING to keep anyone accountable for anything. Coincidence? I think not. People don't like to be called out on their stuff, even if they say they want to hear "the truth." The truth hurts, and the women are killing the messenger (TJ) because they don't like the message. And if Allison was so upset about the damned kitchen, she could have expressed that in SEVERAL other ways that did not include yelling, demanding, and whining. For starters, she could have requested a house meeting, where she could calmly point out that the kitchen was a mess and she personally really felt it should be cleaned. Then they could discuss who should clean it - Lisa and her parents, for instance? Or Jess and Christina, since they obviously have too much free time on their hands anyway and could probably use more practice on their household skills. Allison could have "expressed herself" honestly without becoming petulant, abusive, and mean-spirited toward TJ and the whole house.
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gracelove 15 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Got Milk? Spokesperson"
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11-16-05, 05:54 PM (EST)
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12. "RE: LCs causing the problems?" |
LAST EDITED ON 11-16-05 AT 05:55 PM (EST)>
>IV and Rhonda both told Allison
>to STOP CLEANING UP AFTER
>EVERYONE. She blatantly refused to
>keep to that. TJ, her
>Accountability Partner, attempted to keep
>her accountable that day. Allison
>immediately fought back, sicced IV
>on TJ, and the whole
>house turned again against TJ
>- the only person in
>the house who is actually
>TRYING to keep anyone accountable
>for anything. Coincidence? I think
>not. People don't like to
>be called out on their
>stuff, even if they say
>they want to hear "the
>truth." The truth hurts, and
>the women are killing the
>messenger (TJ) because they don't
>like the message. The goal was not keeping the kitchen dirty. But that is what the exercised turned into. The real point was for Alison not to always be the one to always clean. So how would TJ cleaning instead of Alison NOT support that? In fact I think Jill even questioned, how long they are supposed to leave it like this. And Iyanla never talked to TJ. So how did Alison sic her on TJ? And how did the whole house turn on TJ? It is just like Rhonda said, what was supposed to be an exercise for Alison suddenly became all about TJ. The whole house did not turn on her. Jessica questioned why she was happy about Alison's response. How is that turning on her? Jill I don't recall dissing her. Christina never liked TJ. And I don't recall if Lisa had a reaction. >And if Allison was so upset
>about the damned kitchen, she
>could have expressed that in
>SEVERAL other ways that did
>not include yelling, demanding, and
>whining. For starters, she could
>have requested a house meeting,
>where she could calmly point
>out that the kitchen was
>a mess and she personally
>really felt it should be
>cleaned. Then they could discuss
>who should clean it -
>Lisa and her parents, for
>instance? Or Jess and Christina,
>since they obviously have too
>much free time on their
>hands anyway and could probably
>use more practice on their
>household skills. Allison could have
>"expressed herself" honestly without becoming
>petulant, abusive, and mean-spirited toward
>TJ and the whole house.
> You are saying this, yet it was TJ who was EXCITED that Alison was pissed. So if it was wrong for her to be mean spirited towards TJ and the house, why were they high fiving each other at her reaction? It wasn't until after Jessica challenged her that TJ felt bad and wrong.
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