Actually, we all know that to Eric, Danielle is a non-entity. Honestly, he can barely remember her name. It is only the Oobies that matter. Danielle, nothing. Oobies - Everything. It's obvious he talks to US more than her. I kinda feel sorry for her. Granted, the lights are on but no one is home up there... And seriously, we oobies are expected to compensate for too much here.

It's actually a little embarrassing that Eric calls out to us frequently and loudly so all can hear. Boobs this and boobs that. *sheesh* Plus he has no idea how we like to be handled. We get mauled by his clumsy oafish hands; does he think we are salt water taffy or what? If I wanted a mammogram, I'd see the doctor.

Danielle always seems to end up with these horny immature boys (I am loathe to call them men) that apparently weren't breast fed so they are obsessed with us. Enough already! I can only speak for myself (I am the right oobie) but I wish these kinds of men would handle us more gently and stop embarrassing us by their immature low-class behavior! Now don't get me wrong, I am not a prude! My sister and I are happy to show it off and tantalize and tease, but please keep it a little classy and refer to us in more sweeter terms.

And for the record, Eric, you coarse oafish dolt, we are NOT fish smooshers, fun bags nor your personal pillows to brag about. Oh I wish Danielle would switch teams so we could be treated right. She has had such A-hole boyfriends she calls Eric a "gentleman". Excuse me while I barf.


My sister and I have been working on our timing and hope to both smack Eric hard on the ears at the same time creating enough air pressure so his head explodes. Wish us luck!