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"Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5"
Cygnus X1 7505 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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03-06-06, 07:28 PM (EST)
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"Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
LAST EDITED ON 03-07-06 AT 05:57 PM (EST)Whoda thunk we'd become the most talked-about members of the SO house? I mean, we've been everywhere! The neighbor's bushes, the side of the pool, the Confessional Chair, hanging from the Emmy -- it's almost as if everyone had worn us! And we're not even in fashion! Take THAT, Andy Paige! Don't even get us started about those Olympic unitards.ADMINISTRIVIA:Good job last week, folks. But we still need more houseguests, and more from them (maybe this should be Be the Speedos?!). Allison, where did you go? And how can we not have a Jill? Remember to use your sigs, or at least sign off as your characters. If you want to join in as a RECURRING character, please sign up in the signup thread before posting. WE STILL NEED A DR. STAN. Jessica is also available. First come, first served in the signup thread. That's where you'll find your sigs also. (POETRI: I made a new sig for you in last week's thread.) Remember, if you're unable to post as your character for a time, just send me a note to that effect. Otherwise, I can only assume you're uninterested, which isn't fair to someone who might want to play. (TJ is gone until next week.) Inanimate objects who wish to change to unclaimed HGs may do so in the signup thread. But we welcome new ones of those too. Do NOT post as a character that's been claimed. Thanks. You can post as ad hoc, one-time characters WITHOUT signing up. If you intend to reuse your character, please do sign up...thanks! And HAVE FUN! Non-players: THIS IS NOT A DISCUSSION THREAD. Discussion-type posts may be removed. BUT . . . You may address or ask questions of the role-players as their characters. E-mail or PM me with any problems. And all hail Angelfood for inventing the "Be The" games. Hoorah Hoorah Hoorah!
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Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
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03-06-06, 08:15 PM (EST)
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1. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
*tiptoe* *tiptoe* *tiptoe*(whispers) Oh, good, he isn't here. Where did he put those things? If I were Jonny's Speedos, where would I be? Hmmm... *heads out to see Garden Buddha* *sees Buddha with Speedos tied around as a blindfold* Buddha? What happened? *Buddha coughs and gags as Speedos are removed* What? You mean last night? When he was supposed to be with ME?????? *turns Rootin' Tootin' Rage-filled Red* Who was it, Buddha? You say you couldn't see? Whoever it was kept babbling, wanting to show him a jail cell and offering to serve him some weird kind of salsa? Oh, my gosh. So that is where she is. Oh, that little tart. No wonder he wouldn't let me kick her out a LOOONNNNGGGGG time ago. Oh, she kept saying her daddy would pay him well? And then she giggled and asked if that made her a prostitute? Yep, that's her all right. Thank you so much, Buddha, you have been very helpful. I am sorry about the Speedo burn on your eyes. I am going to take these Speedos to my own private burning ceremony. *takes Speedos to fireplace* *strikes match and watches Speedos go up in flames* Oh, Universe, are you listening? (This works for Iyanla, so I guess I will try it too.) Please strike down the owner of these Speedos and the one who talked him into removing them. Please afflict them with Christina's mmm...disease. *removes mirror from pocket* The wall mirror is better, but this one will have to do. Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who's the fairest one of all? The fairest in the Starting Over Kingdom is still you, Rhonda. Although someone is vying for your position as Queen. Who, mirror? Who is trying to topple my kingdom? I am sorry, but your session is over. Please deposit fifty cents in the next five seconds for your session to continue. Since Dr. Stan is missing, I can make a lot bigger bucks counseling the ladies. Your time is now up. Thank you for playing. *sob* *sob* *wheeze* *cough* *gag* Those Speedos put out some powerful fumes. *sob* *sob* *wail* *looks in mirror, wiping tears from eyes* I love me, I love me, I love me..... Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
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GuyStartingOver 79 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Hollywood Squares Square"
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03-06-06, 09:09 PM (EST)
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3. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
~~~slithering in like a snake~~~ :::almost sing-songy::: Psssssst.... sssssay there, sssssssaucy wench.... that'sssssssss right, ssssssssaucy you are..... sssssssssssay, what'sssssssssss the matter, sssssssssssssssssweetie? Ssssssssssssssssssssomebody got you down? Ssssssssssssseveral sssssssssomebody's? sssssssomeone'sss gone and cast a sssssssspell on yo' ssssssssssweeet ssssssssugar ssssssssurprisssse? and ssssssssssomeone's been ssssssssssnaking around behind your back? ssssssssssssssssomehow, I jussssssssst knew you might yet find a need for meeeeeeeeeeee.That'ssssssssssss right. I can give you alllllll that you sssssssseek. Revenge. Sssssssssssatisfaction. CAMERA time. Yesssssss, even that. Now lisssssssssten, while I whissssssssssper the sssssssssecret that will sssssssset your ssssssssspirit free....... :::wipes ssssslobber off mouth::: Here'ssssssss the deal..... I've got my Mr. Internet Tech Sssssssssservicessss virussssssss protection right here..... you need only ssssssssssupply the virusssssss for coating the outsssssssssside. I've got my ssssssssuper sssssssecret web cam attached and on "night visssssssssssssion" mode. There'sssssss your camera time. I've already got that Chrisssssssssssssstina primed for, ssssssssssshall we ssssssssay, a "followup visssssssssit"... Jussssssssst thissssss once, the virusssssss-encrusted protection getsssssss mixed up with the new onessssssss.... that sssssimpleton Chrissssssstina sssssssuddenly is reinfected.... Misssssssster Murray goessssss for another ssssssssssexual healing.... and voila. Then we have the producersssssss work their magic on the web cam imagessssssss and....... at jusssssssst the right moment..... you happen to sssssssswitch Jonny-boy'sssss TV to a certain sssssssstation, where he ssssssssssees just how well you do without him. Habanero-fiery wizzzzzzzzz.... fessssssssstering sssssssssoresssssssss... and you, in passsssssssionate throessssss with a sssssssssssssssssstrange man...... :::wiping lip again::: Ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssound like a plan???? Hmmmmmmmm?
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mbinkc 32 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beauty Pageant Celebrity Judge"
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03-06-06, 10:55 PM (EST)
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4. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
Speedos, infections and cheating, oh my Buddah statue "seeing" with no eyes.You all be crazy, yeah dat's what I said You messin' with fate, not to mention my head. I came to da house to help #2 Jill Everything since then's been goin' downhill. Mr. Murray, oh please, control yo' needs Miss Rhonda is sufferin' from all yo' dirty deeds. Oh Great Buddah I'm sorry 'bout yo' eyes I'll wash them for you and also sterilize. Icky, yucky, nasty and gross, you know those be the words To describe what's been goin' on...SO house for da' birds! IV, what up wit' you, you be causin' some commotion I be all put off by yo' "motion lotion potion." I be afraid of you all, each and every one Dis ain't da result of anything I have done. You all, BE ASHAMED, seek help from Buddah fast You jus' never know which day will be yo' last.
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sharnina 3083 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
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03-07-06, 03:32 AM (EST)
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7. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
>I came to da house to >help #2 Jill >Everything since then's been goin' downhill. Oh, Poetri don't you remember that you came to the house to help #2 Lisa and not #2 Jill. I don't think the house could have taken two Jills. It was enough that there were two Lisas. Maybe if you used my name you could have written that line this way; I came to da house to help #2 Lisa Everything since then's gone down the pissah. Sort of rhymes. Anyway, everything is Tony's fault, you know.
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Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
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03-13-06, 10:08 AM (EST)
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61. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
Oh, Mr. Internet,Your offer does have certain attractions for me, and I appreciate the compliment, but a couple of things are holding me back. First of all, you are eternally entwined with Lisa (don't worry, she will NEVER leave you alone) and I do not want to see the wench. Secondly, and most importantly.... I.Have.Seen.Your.Picture. Enough said. Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.Check with me again if I have not heard from Jon-Boy in 24 hours. My standards could change. Oh, and the Universe listened to me, so the infection is right where it belongs now...
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JavaT 189 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
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03-07-06, 01:06 AM (EST)
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5. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
Dear Speedos,At least you understand that you are passé, my friend. You have gone the way of the fanny pack and big hair... you are one with the Birkenstock and the bandana... you have simply and truly become the butt-clinging cliché we all want to avoid... and so I must shout, c'est la vie! Get over your spandex self, whydontcha?! Of course, if you'd like a makeover, I'd be glad to enlist my services. Add a dash of velvet and a pinch of satin and you might start to look... well, maybe not good, but a bit less skanky. There is, of course, nothing I can do about the smell. Once somebody like Christina wears you, there's no turning back; you've been permeated. Ta, Try hanging your smelly self out on the line overnight.
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justfionablue 62 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Hollywood Squares Square"
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03-07-06, 11:14 AM (EST)
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8. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
*neighbor playing with dog in back yard*Come here boy...what have you got in your mouth? Eewwww not again. Another red one??? *pries open dog's mouth and speedos fall to ground* Yuck I've had it with these. *grabs bar-b-que tongs and carefully picks up speedos tossing them over the fence into the SO yard...*
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snowflake2 1499 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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03-07-06, 03:16 PM (EST)
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10. "RE: Where's Iyanla??" |
Uhhhhhhhh….Ok, so you know I appreciate the queen size bedroom set, right? And you know you’re like a moms to me, right? In fact, I call my mother everyday to remind her you’re the mother she never was. Uhhhhhh, Ok, so you know I’m your favorite home girl, right…well, after Allison. Well, like, uhhhhh, you know, I just have to authentically tell you I had no, like, uhhhhh, USE for that bedroom set. Queen-sized is a little too small, and in my family, we’re used to sleeping on sofas, anyway. Don’t be mad, but I traded in the bedroom set for something more useful. Cause giiiirl, all that walking around the house just beat the sh!t outta me…all that “from the fridge to the microwave and back”…and you know I’ve forgiven you for making me lug that baggage around, because you didn’t know I had that 40 lb tumor. Oh, yeah, that tumor has hair and teeth and it talks and it told me like the Voice of God, “Girl, this baggage sh!t just gotta stop!!” So let me present the OFFICIAL…<high squeaky voice> JIIIIIIIILL…Tracey Hoveround Forerunner!!! It’s been tricked out by the same people who do all of Diddy’s sh!t. <Goes into phony, upbeat “radio” voice> As you can see, it’s got a kickin’ boom box in the front for when I just wanna chill, blasting Tupac. It’s got a beautiful “Princess” bling grill, and lights to let everyone know I AM….a diva, baby. Hostess pays me for the logo placement. The pole that holds the bucket of KFC goes up & down when I wanna eat…it’s all hydraulics, baby. (presses a button, and the bucket comes down with a pneumatic hum) Iyanla, you wanna join me for some fried chicken? Don’t play, Ok? I know you love you some fried bird, because I think your @ss is bigger than mine. You got some kind of incantation or ritual for blessing my hoveround, Iyanla? Just to make sure all my rides are, uhhhhhhh, you know….safe? Love ya, Mean it!
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Cygnus X1 7505 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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03-07-06, 06:09 PM (EST)
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14. "Salvaging the ratings" |
Rhonda,Need to meet with you and discuss how to liven things up a bit and get our ratings out of the sub-basement. I mean, Maury-frelling-Povich is beating us! Why don't any of these women use the pool? It could get guys to tune in, you know. Works all the time for RW/RR/Gauntlet. (Maybe we need to get Lifetime to pick us up? Naah, they have too many carppy movies to show.) Maybe a Starting Over Family Edition? Worked for The Amazing Race, didn't it? So, how's about it? Submarine races at Malibu Beach? Tomorrow night? Oh, and have you seen my Speedos? And do lose the mirror next time. It's too dark to see it anyway, and from last time I've still got 6 years, 11 months, and 8 days of bad luck to go.
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Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
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03-13-06, 10:19 AM (EST)
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62. "RE: Salvaging the ratings" |
After what you did to me, you expect me to salvage the ratings???? There is no revenge like the revenge of a jilted Rhonda...Umm, if you are having any say, burning and itching problems, repentance is the only way to be healed, by the way. I would be persuaded to ask the Universe for ALL to be aimed at Lousy Lisa. After all, the Universe has a special love for me, you know, since I am so special. And beautiful. And loving. And kind. And giving. And... Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
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Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
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03-07-06, 07:49 PM (EST)
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16. "Mr.'s Murray and Internet..." |
LAST EDITED ON 03-07-06 AT 07:51 PM (EST)I am sorry, I am very ill and dizzy from those Speedo fumes. And I no longer trust Iyanla's potions. I am in a quandry regarding my relationships with both of you. As soon as I am feeling better and have a bit of "me" time, I will get back to you. And WHY am I in competition with a 41-year-old baby????? Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.You both make my world spin...
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mbinkc 32 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beauty Pageant Celebrity Judge"
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03-07-06, 09:11 PM (EST)
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18. "Lisa #2, I be so sorry..." |
LAST EDITED ON 03-07-06 AT 11:01 PM (EST)Oh Dear Lawd now look what I've done, Messed up my HG's and all da #2's and #1's. I do apologize Miss Lisa #2 Fo mistakin' you wit Jill, my mind a blank it drew. If dis show can somehow stay on da air, No mo' same name HG's, it's startin' to grey my hair. A HG's name needs originality... Jus' look at me, I be POETRI!
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turquiosedove 100 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
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03-08-06, 12:36 PM (EST)
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30. "RE: Visit the Bead Store dangit!!" |
Hmmmm, its lined with the finest Italian silk, I can't imagine--wait a minute, OH, Christina!!!
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snowflake2 1499 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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03-07-06, 11:31 PM (EST)
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21. "RE: Visit the Bead Store dangit!!" |
LAST EDITED ON 03-07-06 AT 11:34 PM (EST)Well, uhhhhh, you know, I AM on the lookout for more bling for my scooter, as long as you understand that I'm a STAR now, and that means that I don't actually have to uhhhhhh, you know, PAY for things. Maybe I could put your store's logo/phone number on an inconspicuous spot on my scooter? Christina using my pole, Oh, HELL NO!!!! I don't want that ho's crotch anywhere NEAR my fried chicken!! Homie don't play that!! (By the way, you like that saying? I made it up...yeah, it's totally original, because I like to keep it real.) Love ya, Mean it! (edited to add sig)
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SeasonedRefinement 1248 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
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03-08-06, 08:41 AM (EST)
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26. "RE: Visit the Bead Store dangit!!" |
(Sniff, Sniff, Sniff) Ahhh........Missssss Jilllllll, you smell finga lickin' good! I knew I smelled ya, baby! Come to me, you broad-backed, wide-hipped queen. Let me love on you for a bit...Now Miss Jill, forgive me for pressin' the issue, but I KNOW WHO YOU ARE and generally, YOU'RE A LIAR! You're a liar of whom I stand in awe, but a liar none-the-less. Cutting through the conflama, Miss Jill - where oh where did you get that scooter..really? I mean the bedroom furniture we got you was from a mold damage sale at the Ladies of the Night Motel (that's why there was a coin slot in the head board), so I know that it wasn't worth more than $50. So where did you get the extra cash to buy your hover-round? What I'm saying is this: if we peel back the layers, we won't discover that an aged or infirmed person was left crawling around the local Wal-Mart because you snuck up on them from behind, knocked them off their little seat, and pulled a Prada - will we? If that's what happened, just tell Iyanla. You know my golden rule: "the end justifies the means if YOU come out on top", so I wouldn't burden you with the archaic concept of morality if it isn't a good fit for you. It's just that there may be some unenlightened clods, like the police, who may think that assaulting the handicapped and stealing their hover-round is a Class 2 Felony. Well, either way, Miss Jill...let me speak blessing and life to you and your scooter... (Iyanla raises her arms to the sky, looks up, closes her eyes, and begins to sway): "Oh great goddess, we demand of thee this day, that the universe smile on our sista, Miss Jill. Bring her more and more stuff. Let her take it by force if necessary. We acknowledge that, despite the doctors alleged orders to the contrary, our sista found the strength in her weakened condition to assault someone and make off with their scooter. That is pretty fancy footwork for someone in such tumorous pain. And, if, by some small chance, she actually came by this scooter in some legitimate fashion- no judgment intended by using that word - I declare that you will forget everything I just said...all except the part about giving her more stuff. Give her what she needs to keep the hydraulics lifting, the tires rolling, and the boom box booming. Keep that bucket filled with the Colonel's best offerings. So may it be." Now girlfriend - HAND ME A DRUMSTICK AND TAKE ME FOR A RIDE! *******************************************
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snowflake2 1499 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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03-09-06, 11:12 PM (EST)
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44. "RE: Visit the Bead Store dangit!!" |
Ooooh, Iyanla, I love when you sniff me!Well, I just did what you taught me...I cried out to the Universe that I was sick of all the walkin'. When I saw that scooter, I just knew the Universe was answering me. Even my 40 lb tumor whispered, "Ooooh, Jell-o (that's my tumor's nickname for me), that looks like a mighty sweet ride". Yeah, I had to knock a little old lady out the seat, but I can't let people stand between me and what I want. And if you saw her, Iyanla, you'd know...you could tell that she was one of the unenlightened. She just didn't, uhhhhhhhhhhhhh, you know, get it. Not like you and me, Iyanla. That chair might have belonged to her physically, but spiritually it was mine. So, Ok, now you know I been spendin' a lot of time on the computer lately, right? So, the next thing I'm gonna ask the Universe for is a voice recognition program for my computer. Cause girlfriend, my fingers are gettin' pretty tired from all that keyin'. It's a HELL of a lotta work, ON TOP of a 3-hour a week job. And anyway, Jodi said my forearms are gettin' too cut from all that typin'. Iyanla? You think you could get me a 3rd makeover? I think I heard Kim sayin' I look like Prince gone obese after the last one. <starts singing> Pur-ple Rain, Pur-ple Rain! Love Ya, Mean it!
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SeasonedRefinement 1248 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
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03-08-06, 11:07 AM (EST)
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27. "RE: Visit the Bead Store dangit!!" |
Ah...Mr. Bead Store Owner -Jill has Carte Blanche in your fine establishment??? Let's just make this really clear, because I like to put everything on the table. That doesn't mean that she gets to wander, or scooter, around the store, then, after she leaves, you check the store's security camera, and put her..um..."purchases" on my bill, does it? Cuz I ain't goin' there - and you best not go there neither. uh-uh. *******************************************
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turquiosedove 100 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
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03-08-06, 12:27 PM (EST)
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29. "RE: Visit the Bead Store dangit!!" |
Iy, my loving beadfreak--first of all, that scooter won't fit through the front door, I'm gonna use the red velvet and rope it off up front on the sidewalk sorta VIP style. My bling+camera time and product placement=no bill for you And all we're doing is jazzing up that circus side show err scooter, making it sparkle and look Ho-llywood. She isn't into the fancy schmancy stuff like you---you have fiiiiine taste. Hey, since that pole goes up way high, and is anchored nicely- I'm thinking you might look mighty nice on it too, uh huh!!
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SeasonedRefinement 1248 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
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03-08-06, 12:44 PM (EST)
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31. "RE: Visit the Bead Store dangit!!" |
Well, my oh my, I was waitin' for you to notice just how fine I am. And flattery, as they say, will get you everywhere. ahahahaha!So, do you think Jill is hotter than me? Don't count the scooter. *******************************************
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turquiosedove 100 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
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03-09-06, 10:51 AM (EST)
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39. "RE: Visit the Bead Store dangit!!" |
Well, I haven't seen Jill yet or her pride and joy so I'll get back to ya, but I do love it when you fondle my beads, oh yah!
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lovemydogdude 1253 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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03-08-06, 05:35 PM (EST)
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32. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
Jill you've never wanted to share, not your cupcakes, not your wine, not your camera time...now your pole WTF..like YOU need it. I bet if I jumped on you wouln't have the strength to pry me off teehee come and get me neener neener.
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justfionablue 62 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Hollywood Squares Square"
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03-09-06, 02:29 AM (EST)
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37. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
*low threatening GROWL from dog...teeth bared*
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justfionablue 62 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Hollywood Squares Square"
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03-10-06, 06:11 PM (EST)
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52. "RE: Hey, Neighbor . . ." |
*cracks open front door and grabs suspicious looking envelope off porch*Thanks. I think.....
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lovemydogdude 1253 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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03-09-06, 02:03 AM (EST)
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36. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
Oh Mr. Internet POOOOlEeeezzzzz you stick with you're pole women..Lisastick will be enough challenge for you..you're a user, abuser, a$$munch cheating' son a b!tch..not interested tee hee unless you want to tell me how perty I am *snort* I'll take what I can get for free..kinda nice for a change teehee. P.S. has it ever burnt so bad when you peed that you thought God was striking you dead for your sins?..thought you might know???
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snowflake2 1499 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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03-09-06, 10:39 PM (EST)
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43. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
B!tch SHUT UP!!! about that damn pole! You think you got skills? Well, let me tell you a lil sumpthin' sumpthin'. I, Jiiiiiiillll...Tracey earned some green workin' the pole back in Miami when I was between radio gigs. Yeah, and not just any pole...the club owner took one look at me, and knew I had such star quality that he shipped in a genuine fireman's pole for me to dance on. I might not have gotten off the ground, but still, I heard many a man comment that he felt his world shake when I busted a move. I probably would have made good money in that career, too, if I didn't knock that guy in the 3rd row unconscious with my thigh. HATER!When I danced, I used to shout out a cute phrase I made up all by myself...."SHOW ME THE MONEY!!", I'd yell. (Kinda clever, don't you think. Yeah, and it's totally ORIGINAL!!) Love ya, Mean it!
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pinksparkleguitar 1222 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
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03-10-06, 11:02 AM (EST)
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49. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
The Great wise, and honorable Buddha has been in intensive therapy for the Speedos incident. And because I had to hear John-Boy and Throw-up Lisa going at it. I just don't know what poor, old, lovable Buddha can do to get out of here. Buddha can't take it anymore! I haven't reached Nirvana in months, I have no pinky on my right finger . . . .no camera shots for quite a while . .. .hmmmmmmm. The only one who watches out for the wise yet immobile Buddha is Rhonda, although she always has that dang mirror. The great and Honorable Buddha meditates, hoping for divine intervention . . .-grabs pencil and paper conveniently left by NuLisa who still hasn't written that love letter- Dear HGTV - This is you wise and honorable Buddha. Remember me? from that divine design show? I know I did some really innapproriate reincarnations on some people . . . .but I promise that house is more than enough punishment! Please take me back!!! Sincerely, your humble Buddha anyone got an envelope?
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susan765 166 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
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03-10-06, 12:13 PM (EST)
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51. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
The car has been in the shop for the last week. Some "Witchy Women" poured something in my gas tank. Now I'm back on track and carting these crazy women here and there and my radio doesn't even work! I was just playing some Pearl Jam! Who doesn't like Pearl Jam?! The crazy person kept banging and smashing me saying I was out to get her! I think I need some Budda intervention. Hey bead shop owner! Wanna work out a deal? I'll drive by your store once a week and you provide me with some nice peaceful mood beads to drown these whinning women out. Artist: PEARL JAM Song: Last Kiss Album: Lost Dogs Where, oh where, can my baby be? the lord took her away from Me. she’s gone to heaven, so I’ve got to be good. so I can see my baby when i Leave this world. We were out on a date in my daddy’s car. we hadn’t driven very far. there in The road, straight ahead. a car was stalled, the engine was dead. I couldn’t stop, so I swerved to the right. I’ll never forget the sound that Night. the screamin tires, the bustin glass. the painful scream that I heard Last. Oh where, oh where, can my baby be? the lord took her away from me. she’s gone To heaven, so I’ve got to be good. so I can see my baby when I leave this world. When I woke up the rain was pourin down. there were people standin all around. Something warm flowing through my eyes. but somehow I found my baby that night. I lifted her head, she looked at me and said. hold me darling, just a little While. I held her close, I kissed her our last kiss. I found the love that i Knew I had missed. Well now she’s gone. even though I hold her tight. I lost my love, my life, That night. Oh where, oh where, can my baby be? the lord took her away from me. she’s gone To heaven, so I’ve got to be good. so I can see my baby when I leave this World.
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mbinkc 32 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beauty Pageant Celebrity Judge"
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03-10-06, 10:14 PM (EST)
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54. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 5" |
Oh great Buddah, did you happen to see On today's show, there was a drownin' bee!Please heal thyself, oh divine one To save dees bees buzzin' 'round in da sun. Whose got yo' finger, is that where yo' magic lies? Was it da horny guy, or da beeyotch that fake cries? I be thinkin' you da one that's gonna save us all 'Fore we all pile in da car and head straight for da wall. ***bows head*** ***sobs...sniffs...*** No mo' drownin' bee Please, for me, I be POETRI.
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snowflake2 1499 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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03-11-06, 08:57 PM (EST)
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55. "RE: Psssst, Poetri..." |
<<whispers>> Can you write me some new catchphrases? I need some new sh!t to say...I think I might be overusing the "For the love of Christmas" thing, but I can't come up with anything on my own. My mind is blank. But, uhhhhhhh, you know, this needs to stay between us. And, I got no money, so I can't, uhhhhh, you know...PAY you. But I can pay you in stuff I steal from the house. You like Omaha steaks, Poetri? Or maybe you like art? Would you be uhhhhhhh, like, you know, interested in some decorative pears? Or maybe I could get you the iPod they keep by the computer? You like Jenny Craig prepackaged food, Poetri? Love Ya, Mean it!
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SeasonedRefinement 1248 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
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03-11-06, 11:31 PM (EST)
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57. "RE: Psssst, Poetri..." |
(Iyanla is getting into her Mercedes. She looks over at the passenger seat where she had left a shopping bag from her favorite boutique, "Dr. DuPrince's Voodoo & HooDoo Supplies")HEY!!! (digging frantically through the bag) It's missin'! Where's my "Lucky Hand Lady With a Big Butt Spell Book"? That was special ordered from Haiti! I'VE BEEN ROBBED! What the hell is this? (picking up something from the floor) Chicken bones? Hmm...I can use those. Hostess cupcake wrappers? Somebody's been messin' in here! *******************************************
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Ingenue1983 55 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Hollywood Squares Square"
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03-12-06, 04:51 PM (EST)
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58. "RE: Psssst, Poetri..." |
LAST EDITED ON 03-12-06 AT 05:00 PM (EST)*edited to make the picture a little smaller so those with dial-up don't have to wait forever to load the page*
Hey, I'm an unhappy, underpaid editor who smuggles out tapes, still shots, letters, etc... you know, things that end up on the cutting room floor. I'll be dropping by now and again when the guard takes a bathroom break WITH his 'Readers Digest...' (He has IBS = Irritable Bowel Syndrome, so we um.... well, we steer clear of the WC after he takes his 'reading breaks.....' hehe) So, that is when I get the chance to dart out with these precious little snippets under my coat... I keep telling Mr. Murray that THIS is what people want to see. This will show him..... My first offering is a little something that happens all the time. It's what goes on when Allison, Jill & Iyanla are sharing the same air space.
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