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"Advice - Boss duped me "
Maroonclown 5829 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 09:50 AM (EST)
 
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"Advice - Boss duped me " |
This is the oddest thing and I don't quite know how to deal with it. Keep in mind boss is on vacation and not reachable until next week.Valentine's Day - Unbeknowst to me DH ordered beautiful Valentines Day flowers to be delivered to my office. I arrive home that evening and he asks where the flowers are. "What flowers?", I reply. "The flowers I had sent to your office". So, annoyed that my flowers weren't delivered I had DH call the florist that night and cancel the order. The next day I was working from home. I decided to place a call to the florist to confirm the flowers were never delivered, DH had cancelled, but if they were interested in making it up to me in the name of good customer service, then I would be at my home address. I love this florist and it would not be unusual for them to take care of this. A gorgeous bouquet of flowers arrives that day. Stunning! A few weeks pass and our credit card bill comes in, with a charge from the florist. I call the florist, leave a message that I don't think we should have been charged. No return call back. I called again today and spoke to the manager. Here's where it gets weird. The manager said the flowers were delivered to the office on Valentine's Day and were signed for by my boss. The manager had the correct name. The manager then informed me my boss then called the florist back the next day and told them he forgot to give them to me so could they please deliver another bouquet to my home. He put the charge on his credit card. I have confirmed that there is indeed, a charge on his credit card. No-one in the office remembers flowers being delivered to the office on Valentine's Day. And my boss never, ever mentioned this to me at all. I thought the bouquet that was delivered the next day was the apology from the florist. Do I confront the boss upon his return? Do I ask him to reimburse me for the original bouquet to make up for what's he's done? I'm really hurt and confused because the only way I can resolve this is to believe he stole my flowers to possibly give to his wife. And that is not part of his make-up. Not only is this guy my boss but I consider him a friend as well.  Tribe Spring Fling 
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aquariaqueen 2616 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Survivor-themed Cruise Spokesperson"
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04-01-08, 09:57 AM (EST)
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2. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
Wow....You're about 6-7 weeks late with this issue. Has he been gone all this time, or is it because you just found the charge on your bill? I would somehow let him know you're on to him, theft is still illegal in our country. 
"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it" - Albert Einstein
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aquariaqueen 2616 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Survivor-themed Cruise Spokesperson"
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04-01-08, 10:13 AM (EST)
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15. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
I guess what baffles me is that he thought you wouldn't find out????? Duh, whoever sent you flowers would surely ask you about getting them if you didn't thank them for them first.Did he really think he could get away with this?
"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it" - Albert Einstein
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aquariaqueen 2616 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Survivor-themed Cruise Spokesperson"
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04-01-08, 10:15 AM (EST)
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17. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
LAST EDITED ON 04-01-08 AT 10:17 AM (EST)How did the florist get that credit card number and how does the poster know about it? ****Nevermind, I just re-read the original post. Sorry.
"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it" - Albert Einstein
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Maroonclown 5829 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 10:11 AM (EST)
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14. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
the only thing that did not happen that you expected to happen was you did not get free flowers.It goes deeper than that. DH and I agree not to be to expectant around things like Valentine's Day, so it didn't faze me that I didn't get flowers. What really bugs me is my hubby went to an effort to surprise me because he loves me, and to see the look of disappointment on his face that night after work was awful. He tried to do something really nice for me and he thinks that he failed. And that is unacceptable. Tribe Spring Fling
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newsomewayne 9353 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 10:19 AM (EST)
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20. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
Well that just proves my point further.You were not expecting anything for V-Day. Later, after the fact, you were expecting free flowers and did not get them. It seems to me that this is when you became troubled about the issue, otherwise you probably would've confronted the boss about it earlier. I think your looking to place malicious intent where there is none. The florist did their job. They delivered flowers to your office, as they were contracted to do. Once the delivery is signed for, their obligation is done. I see no reason they should give you free flowers. Your boss, otoh, did not hold up his obligation to you and deliver flowers from his hand to yours, which is what he agreed to do when he signed for them from the florist. Apparently he tried to make up for that by buying additional flowers to be sent to your house, a noble gesture, I would say. Much better than a "I screwed up, here's $30." I understand the disappointment. But I honestly think we're looking at a molehill here, not a mountain. 
It's party time! Agman is excellent! 2008
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Maroonclown 5829 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 10:26 AM (EST)
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22. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
I agree the florist did their job. They have their proof.It seems to me that this is when you became troubled about the issue, otherwise you probably would've confronted the boss about it earlier. See above. In trying to get the charge of the flowers that were not delivered on VD, it was only this morning that I found out about what happened. I haven't been sitting on this for a month! Credit card bills come after the fact. You're mixing up assuming I'm a whiny little princess to the much larger issue of feeling somewhat betrayed by my boss, and knowing my husband did something really nice for me and thinks he failed. And, FWIW, I will shower him with hugs and kisses when I get home tonight. Tribe Spring Fling
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newsomewayne 9353 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 10:43 AM (EST)
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25. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
>See above. In trying to
>get the charge of the
>flowers that were not delivered
>on VD, it was only
>this morning that I found
>out about what happened. Okay, my bad. I got the order of things happening wrong. I thought you had called about the order and knew what the boss had done a month ago. Whoops! >
>You're mixing up assuming I'm a
>whiny little princess to the
>much larger issue of feeling
>somewhat betrayed by my boss, Not my intent, at all, so, I apologize for the miscommunication. Incidently, I would still ask the boss about things when he gets back. BTW, I'm a little confused. Are you his Exec. assistant, or is somebody else? Or does he have two?
It's party time! Agman is excellent! 2008
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Seana 5044 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 12:35 PM (EST)
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36. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
You're right, of course. Reading your and others' possible embarrassment/silly explanations makes me feel a bit more hopeful for MC. I can usually come up with all kinds of reasons why someone would do something that seems really wrong. Just this time I couldn't.
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miamicatt 9247 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 10:32 AM (EST)
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23. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
Yes, yes he did steal your flowers.I can picture it now -- the flowers arrive while you are out and as your boss is signing for them he's making small talk with the delivery person. "I wonder what these are for..." Then his heart fills with dread and his pants with poo as he realizes "OMFG it's Valentine's Day and I completely forgot". Knowing he couldn't possibly make it out of the office and anywhere in time to get something worthwhile, he makes a snap decision. In a panic, the fool steals your flowers to keep from getting the beating that surely awaits him at home should he show up empty handed. I would take pity on the poor sap for now and leave it alone. Wait until much later when y'all are out having a fun lunch or something to make a joke about it. Things could get really awkward and weird if you bring it up -- best to just eat the cost of the flowers for now and try to laugh a little about it. It is kinda funny when you think about it -- what a tool. 
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mysticwolf 10692 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 12:30 PM (EST)
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34. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
After reading your post and most of the responses I have a question for you, which could lead to an alternate explanation of your boss' actions.Valentine's Day was on a Thursday this year. By any chance, were you or your boss off, or unusually busy with meetings/offsites, etc. on Friday? It's possible that, if he actually forgot to give them to you on VD (and he may have put them out-of-sight in a cupboard so you wouldn't happen on them accidentally) and forgot about them on Friday he knew they'd be mostly wilted by the time you got them. From what you've said about him it would seem out of character for him to steal them for his wife. Why would he need to? Once he was reminded it was VD, by seeing your flowers, all he'd have to do if he'd forgotten was get his Exec. #####'t. to call and order a bouquet for her. I think in this situation I'd be looking for the best possible light in which to cast it. I might mention it to him, but not confrontationally. Now that you know what happened, you could mention what a nice gesture he made in making it up to you, since you just found out that he did, and see what he says. In the ensuing conversation you could mention that dh was really glad to finally know what happened so he could quit feeling badly about his gesture gone wrong. That should at least clue him in that he should have said something and lead to an apology. 
A Sweet Seana
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Maroonclown 5829 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 12:45 PM (EST)
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37. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
I'm still feeling really awful about this.I've worked through being confused, to pissed off, to wondering how anyone would think that it's okay to do that. I keep ending up at the lack of respect shown not only to me but to DH as well.. They were my flowers, damnit and he thought it was okay to take them and think that I would be okay to get flowers the day after. Mystic, they were not hidden in a cupboard, although I commend you for your ability to see the good in everything. I checked with everyone here and given the way the office is set up there is no way flowers got into this office without anyone noticing. If he signed for them he would have been standing about 10 feet from my office. I share a wall with his office. He would have to walk by my office on the way back to his. He should have, as anyone else would have, taken the five steps to my desk and placed them on there. I'm making myself sick to my stomach. Tribe Spring Fling
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byoffer 15947 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 12:59 PM (EST)
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39. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
I'm going to try to stay on Mystic's couch, if for no other reason than to hope for a positive reason for this.I share a wall with his office. He would have to walk by my office on the way back to his. How was it that he was the one to take the package if his office is not closest to the reception area? Where was his new assistant? Where were you? If he did get them from the courier, did he immediately take the flowers down to his car? Surely they didn't sit in his office all day un-noticed. Can the delivery company tell you what time of day they were delivered? Could it have been after hours, so he decided to use your flowers and order new ones for you for the next day?  
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Maroonclown 5829 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 01:09 PM (EST)
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44. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
Very good question By. Because he never, ever signs for anything.You've been in our building. There's a lobby which is nothing more than a vestibule with an elevator. Office is elevator access only. The elvator opens and you are smack dab in the middle of our office. The Executive Assistant is right in front of the elevator with a big floor to ceiling window in her office which faces the elevator. The only thing I can even think of, seeing as no-one here saw any flowers come off the elevator, is boss intercepted the courier downstairs in the lobby. He then could have turned around, walked to his car, put the flowers in, and walked back to the office as if nothing had happened. I hate these thoughts but they are the only ones that I can come up with. Tribe Spring Fling
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qwertypie 9776 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 08:33 PM (EST)
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64. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
Forget-me-nots?
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AyaK 10426 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-02-08, 04:11 PM (EST)
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65. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
VD - the gift that keeps on giving.
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Maroonclown 5829 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 01:13 PM (EST)
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45. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
He called on VD night and left a voicemail as it was after hours.I called the next day, got voicemail and my message was to confirm cancellation of order, and added that if they were thinking of making it up from a customer service point of view, that I was at home. I left my address and phone number. Next thing I know, there's a delivery car with a lovely bouquet. I automatically assumed they got my message because of they delivered to my home and didn't think anything else of it until I got the bill. The first time I talked to an actual person was last week when I was trying to sort out my VISA bill. Then to the manager today. Tribe Spring Fling
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frisky 11695 desperate attention whore postings
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04-01-08, 01:22 PM (EST)
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48. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
How sweet of your DH to have made that effort for you on VD day.And what a jacka$$ your boss is for what he did -- stealing the flowers to give to his wife. Do you have access to the wife? Is there some way you could strike up a convo about hubbies and showing up after work with flowers etc? Sometimes we girls get into those kinds of hubby-related convos, you know? If he "forgot" to give them to you, then why didn't he explain himself to you? Why just explain to the florist, and not to you? GUILT! That's why. I totally understand your anger. When I graduated, my DH bought me a beautiful watch. I wasn't fifteen minutes out of the arena and my boss handed me a gift in front of DH and my unemployed mother, and I opened it and it was a watch and I started oohing and ahhing and I could see DH shrinking into the ground in my peripheral vision. I felt bad for my mom because I knew she couldn't afford anything, and then DH handed me my gift and said "I guess you may as well open this now, but we can take it back tomorrow and get something else" and it was a watch.  I felt so bad for him. My boss was the type of person who had to make a big show of giving me the present. I've never worn the watch she gave me. Yes, it was generous, but it undermined DH and put a damper on my whole day.  
Perpetual *headbutt* compliments of Rolly.
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maroonclowns mom 1102 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
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04-01-08, 02:31 PM (EST)
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55. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
LAST EDITED ON 04-01-08 AT 02:46 PM (EST)
 smokeysmom
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blacknwhitedog 6532 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-01-08, 03:59 PM (EST)
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59. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
I'm sure you're stewing about this because you can't reach your boss right now- I know that would bug me. When he returns- ask him about it- there is probably a simple explanation.Sorry your flower delivery got scrued up. I don't think it would occur to me to call the florist to ask for free flowers. But if I was DH I would have called to check on the delivery the next day- maybe you would have gotten it all straightened out. I sent some flowers to my sister a few weeks ago in honor (?) of her divorce and the florist messed up the card so she didn't know they were from me- I kept wondering why she never thanked me for the flowers! 
Syren 2007
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AyaK 10426 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-02-08, 04:22 PM (EST)
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67. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
I agree that it's not acceptable if your boss deliberately took your flowers. I think you deserve an answer. But, considering the way you have described your boss before, I'm not sure that's what happened.I think the right way to present this is straightforward -- when your boss returns, don't tell the boss that you already know about the charge for the replacement flowers (after all, you aren't supposed to be snooping through that, even if you do know how). Instead, tell your boss the truth -- you thought that the flowers you'd received the day after Valentines' Day were make-up flowers from the florist, because you and your husband had been so upset when your flowers didn't show up on VD. When you saw that you'd been charged for them, you called the credit-card company to have the charge removed. Then the florist told them (and you) that the flowers your husband ordered had actually been delivered and signed for by your boss, and that he'd ordered the make-up flowers for you, and ask if that was really the case, and if so, why?
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mavs_fan 299 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
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05-05-08, 01:09 AM (EST)
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71. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
What was the final result on this - if you don't mind sharing?
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mavs_fan 299 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
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05-05-08, 01:47 AM (EST)
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73. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
Thank you.
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qwertypie 9776 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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04-02-08, 09:38 PM (EST)
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69. "RE: Advice - Boss duped me " |
block that swoop!
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