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PLEASE NOTE: The Reality TV World Message Boards are filled with desperate
attention-seekers pretending to be one big happy PG/PG13-rated family. Don't
be fooled. Trying to get everyone to agree with you is like herding cats,
but intolerance for other viewpoints is NOT welcome and respect for other
posters IS required at all times. Jump in and play, and you'll soon find out
how easy it is to fit in, but save your drama for your mama. All members are
encouraged to read the
complete guidelines.
As entertainment critic Roger
Ebert once said, "If you disagree with something I write, tell me so, argue
with me, correct me--but don't tell me to shut up. That's not the American way."
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"In an attempt to suck it up and find humor I give you the following funny:"
jkokoj 4389 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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09-29-05, 01:13 PM (EST)
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"In an attempt to suck it up and find humor I give you the following funny:" |
A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 lb. due to
very serious health risks. As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do it, he
ran across an ad in the newspaper for a GUARANTEED
WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM. "Guaranteed. Yeah right!" he thought to himself. But
desperate, he calls them up and subscribes to the
3-day/10 pound weight loss program. The next day there's a knock at his door, and when he
answers, there stands before him a voluptuous,
athletic, 19 year old young lady dressed in nothing
but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign round her
neck. She introduces herself as a representative of
the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can
catch me, you can have me!" Without a second thought he takes off after her. A few
miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches
her and! is too tired to have his way with her. After they are rested and she leaves, he thinks to
himself, "I like the way this company does business!"
The same girl shows up for the next two days and the
same thing happens. The fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to
find he has lost
10 lb. as promised. He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound
program. The next day there's a knock at the door and
there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman
he has ever seen in his life, wearing nothing but
Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that
reads, "If you catch me, you can have me." He's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a
very long while to catch her, but when he does, he is
cramping and wheezing. For the next four days, the
same routine happens and much to his delight, on the
fifth day he weighs himself and found! he has lost
another 20 lb as promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to
order the 7-day/50 pound program. "Are you sure?" asks
the representative on the phone. "This is our most
rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies, "I
haven't felt this good in years. "The next day there's a knock at the door and when he
opens it he finds a muscular guy standing there
wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign
around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, you're mine."
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Cyndimaus 3117 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
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09-29-05, 01:55 PM (EST)
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1. "RE: In an attempt to suck it up and find humor I give you the following funny:" |
That was a good one. I didn't anticipate the punchline at all. Thanks for sharing.
sig courtesy of Cygnus
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CantStandToLook 6254 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-29-05, 02:04 PM (EST)
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2. "RE: In an attempt to suck it up and find humor I give you the following funny:" |
buwahhaha....thanks jen, loved it
Slice & Dice Sigpic Chop Shop 2005
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geg6 14941 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-29-05, 02:10 PM (EST)
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3. "RE: In an attempt to suck it up and find humor I give you the following funny:" |
LOL, Jen!Koko, she funny. 
I'm such a slut for the blues.
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Emily RugBurn 663 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Reality Show Commentator"
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09-29-05, 03:22 PM (EST)
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4. "RE: In an attempt to suck it up and find humor I give you the following funny:" |
 Good one, koko! Laughter is the best medicine! ~ EmRB
Generously handcrafted by the Amazing RollDdice; no relation to the Amazing Spider-Man.
Because there just aren't enough lame blogs on the internet.
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AyaK 10426 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-30-05, 11:50 AM (EST)
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5. "ROFLMAO" |
 Soylent Green: recycling America, one person at a time.
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lvoetulips 1025 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
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09-30-05, 11:56 AM (EST)
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6. "RE: In an attempt to suck it up and find humor I give you the following funny:" |
Very funny koko!!!!!!
I started one too!
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Lasann 3616 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Thong Contest Judge"
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09-30-05, 12:44 PM (EST)
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7. "Thank you!" |
That was so funny. Now maybe I can finsh reading the Contitution thread - oh, maybe not yet!
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CantStandToLook 6254 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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09-30-05, 04:11 PM (EST)
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9. "liked yours so much" |
I thought I'd add another to your thread
BEST DRUNK STORY OF THE MONTH...
A drunken man walks into a biker bar, sits down at
the bar and orders a drink.
Looking around, he sees three men sitting at a
corner table. He gets up, staggers to the table,
leans over, looks the biggest, meanest, biker in
the face and says: "I went by your grandma's house
today and I saw her in the hallway buck naked.
Man, she is one fine looking woman!"
The biker looks at him and doesn't say a word. His
buddies are confused, because he is one bad biker
and would fight at the drop of a hat. Jennie: The drunk leans on the table again and says: "I got
it on with your grandma and she is good, the best I
ever had!"
The biker's buddies are starting to get really mad
but the biker still says nothing.
The drunk leans on the table one more time and says,
"I'll tell you something else, boy, your grandma
liked it!"
At this point the biker stands up, takes the drunk
by the shoulders looks him square in the eyes and
says..
"Grandpa,.......Go home, you're drunk!!
Whose nutz? ARnutz
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jkokoj 4389 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Jerry Springer Show Guest"
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10-03-05, 09:40 AM (EST)
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10. "RE: liked yours so much" |
LOL Steve!
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Skiver 1118 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
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10-03-05, 10:55 AM (EST)
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11. "RE: In an attempt to suck it up and find humor I give you the following funny:" |
That was genuinely LOL funny, not the usual 'heh' LOL funny. I am now attempting to commit it to memory... ... Failed.That always happens. I guess I'll just forward it via e-mail. 
Sig by Cygnus X1
"The good news is -- and it's hard for some to see it now -- that out of this chaos is going to come a fantastic Gulf Coast, like it was before. Out of the rubbles of Trent Lott's house -- he's lost his entire house -- there's going to be a fantastic house. And I'm looking forward to sitting on the porch." - GW Bush
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