|
|
PLEASE NOTE: The Reality TV World Message Boards are filled with desperate
attention-seekers pretending to be one big happy PG/PG13-rated family. Don't
be fooled. Trying to get everyone to agree with you is like herding cats,
but intolerance for other viewpoints is NOT welcome and respect for other
posters IS required at all times. Jump in and play, and you'll soon find out
how easy it is to fit in, but save your drama for your mama. All members are
encouraged to read the
complete guidelines.
As entertainment critic Roger
Ebert once said, "If you disagree with something I write, tell me so, argue
with me, correct me--but don't tell me to shut up. That's not the American way."
|
|
"Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16"
sharnina 3075 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
|
05-22-06, 08:18 PM (EST)
|
"Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
*Note to Production Staff*This week is a godsend the last week of the show people. Let's avoid as many butt shots as we can get as many shots of the former inmates houseguests as we can. PLEASE!!! avoid all rearview shots of Christie running. We don't want that to be the last thing the suckers viewers remember. And remember, be safe out there. Rhonda, I think we need to have a "conference" about the 5k, if ya know what I mean... ADMINISTRIVIA: You need not just follow my lead here. You can take this in any show-related direction you wish. Remember to use your sigs, or at least sign off as your characters. If you want to join in as a RECURRING character, please sign up in the signup thread> before posting. That's whereyou'll findyour sigs also (although, if you're replacing someone, it may be in the old signup thread). Remember, if you're unable to post as your character for a time, just send me a note to that effect. Otherwise,I can only assume you're uninterested, which isn't fair to someone who might want to play. Currently claimed roles are: Jon Murray, Dr. Stan, Iyanla, Rhonda, Andy (and her mom, and her left brow), Antonia, Jodi, Kelly and her bathroom, Niambi, Christina, Christie, Poetri, Dr. VantToLookJung,Lanre, the Garden Buddha, the RoseBush, the Front Door, theDining Room Table, Bead Store Owner, "Mr. Situation," the CameraMan, and the Pillsbury Dough Boy. Here is the link to the new thread containing some of the old sigs. Old Sigs New characters, or resurrected old ones, welcome! Not to mention assorted visitors, of whom we had a great many last few weeks! Do NOT post as a character that's been claimed. Thanks. You can post as ad hoc, one-time characters WITHOUT signing up. If you intend to reuse your character, please do sign up . . . thanks! And HAVE FUN! Non-players: THIS IS NOT A DISCUSSION THREAD. Discussion-type posts may be removed. BUT . . . You may address or ask questions of the role-players as their characters. E-mail or PM me with any problems. Based on various other "Be The . . ." games, created by (all hail) Angelfood.
|
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
JavaT 189 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
05-22-06, 09:12 PM (EST)
|
2. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
I keep tellin' ya, honey, I'll help you if you help me! And I'll spot you all the $20s you want if you just stock my fridge with a few cold ones. Don't worry, I won't let you want for nothin'. Stick with me and I promise I won't off myself. Oh, yeah, P.S.: You look OK. Kinda hard to tell with that broken tooth. Hey, I'll pay to fix that too, for good, only now we're talking cases, not just 6-packs.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
alaholly 497 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Daytime Soap Guest Star"
|
05-22-06, 09:20 PM (EST)
|
3. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
"Uh, Danny, honey, uh, I keep tellin' you that you seem like a real sweet guy (big eyeroll with newly trimmed brows) but you're just not my type, uh, just too big of a stah, (small grimace) for me. But listen, hon, I got some furniture I could sell you for the right price."
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
Anne18 239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
|
05-23-06, 00:15 AM (EST)
|
6. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
LAST EDITED ON 05-23-06 AT 04:51 PM (EST)LAST EDITED ON 05-23-06 AT 00:19 AM (EST) Antonia, From one eyebrow girl to another - do NOT let ANYONE touch your eyebrows! No Andy, No eyebrow ladies, not Rhonda, no one! And what did Mean Andy mean anyway when she said, "You don't want people to talk about your eyebrows behind your back??" She said that like it is some kind of crime to have eyebrows thicker than a line. I'm telling you, she has NO CLUE what she's talking about!! Thank goodness you stuck to your guns and made sure they didn't take them all out! Love, Brooke Shields
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
alaholly 497 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Daytime Soap Guest Star"
|
05-23-06, 10:16 AM (EST)
|
10. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
"Well damn Brooke. Thanks for your sup-port. Maybe you would like to join my club "Brows Really Are Thick", I call it "B.R.A.T."? You got the brows for it girl. For a small fee of $500 I'll send ya a special membership card that Jodi made for me on the computer *er* I ordered special."<Humph. Christie WAS right. You can sell anything.> "Don't worry about Mean Andy. I locked her in the guest house 'cuz she came aftah me with those hedge clippers. And anyhow she's busy workin' on Rhonda, the Queen of Invisible and Everchanging Brows. Poor Rhonda. She doesn't have a chance to join our exclusive club. She's got nothin' left." <Mumbles to self, "See now I am an entra-pre-nu-ah. Mama Iyanla spoke the truth. I can BE anything I want." Lopsided toothy grin with side head tilt and tidy eyebrow roll.>
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
JavaT 189 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
05-23-06, 07:19 AM (EST)
|
8. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
Protection? From moi? You've got to be kidding, girlfriend. I am with child! I repeat: I am with child! And it's apparently going to be a difficult pregnancy, not to mention the delivery. So no heavy lifting (as in pruners for your eyebrows), no excessive trying on of clothes, no whirlwind makeovers, no strenuous disabling of security devices on clothing cutting off clothing tags. And NO kicking of anyone's a$$. I had my first ultrasound yesterday and here it is: Actually, there is one a$$ I'd like to kick, and it's that little concrete guy sitting out in the garden. Better go put on my -- comfy yet fashionable and durable -- Dr. Martens for that.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
05-23-06, 08:21 PM (EST)
|
19. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
Oh, Great and Wise Buddha,I do believe you are being fooled. I know it is difficult to fool Buddha, but I know things of which you know not. Dr. VantToLookJung has vast talents. In his genius, he is capable of intrauterine botox injections and plastic surgery, even to an innocent fetus. Andy simply wants you to feel indebted to her so that you will send good karma her way. I think she was too embarrassed to admit to anyone that Jodi is really the father. I am sure that you and the Universe have some retribution for her for that one! Buddha, you are beautiful, loved, and have a beautiful spirit. I am so concerned about you, so let me leave you one of my special mirrors. I just wrote "My body and spirit are beautiful. I love me dearly." clearly on your body, so I want you to look at that in the mirror and meditate on it, dear Buddha. I do that often, and it has helped me SO much. Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
JavaT 189 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
05-23-06, 09:15 PM (EST)
|
20. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
Oh, all right, I'll 'fess up. I was too embarrassed to reveal the true father of my child. But as they say, one picture can launch a thousand eyebrows, or something like that...It's true, Mother messed around with Buddha but good, and drugged him on several occasions. And it was her idea to blame my pregnancy on him! Mother's hairstyle isn't the only bad attribute she has, that's for sure. Don't worry, I'll take all the retribution I deserve. But I sure wish Dr. Vant had an answer to my little "situation." At the rate this thing's growing, it's going to be murder trying to give birth! Wouldja look at the size of the head already?! Sheesh! My belly will rival that of Jill and her 40-lb. tumor. Oh, and RhonDAW, thanks for the "Rosemary's Baby" DVD. What a great story! But that Mia Farrow sure could use some eye makeup.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
JavaT 189 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
05-24-06, 05:25 AM (EST)
|
22. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
Come on girls, why not call a pro when you need the job done? Let's do a PATERNITY TEST! It's obvious there's some kind of tomfoolery going on with those sonograms. *light bulb goes off in Maury's head... Hey, why didn't I think of doing ultrasounds on my show? Maybe it's not too late...'* Buddha, I know you hate the taste of cotton, but get over it. Our time is running short, and we need to get to the bottom of this mystery, pronto-like. Jodi, I know you don't mind opening your mouth, so let's go for it. I'll send these samples to the lab and make my announcement by the end of the week. You don't need Dr. Stan or Rhonda – you need me!
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
kircon 3239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
|
05-23-06, 04:46 AM (EST)
|
7. "Hey Christie!" |
*leaning on crutches*I know I told you I would support you with this race. That's why I was brought on the show. But look at me. I can hardly stand. *single tear running down cheek* I hurt both ankles and my knee helping Lil T graduate and dragging Sasha around. You will never guess which head producer I ran into. They also got hurt in that stupid mountain climbing exercise. I know for a fact the LC's are in big trouble. Well what can I do to help? Maybe Lanre could carry me around. I'll hold a bucket and help raise money. *single tear runs down cheek* I'm soooo sorry, later. *looks around and see no one* *skips into the house*
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
JavaT 189 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
05-23-06, 07:37 AM (EST)
|
9. "RE: Hey Christie!" |
Oh, boo-hoo, you big old cryin', cigarette-smokin' ex-athelete. You think you got problems? How would you like it if you were made outta turquoise foam? No, wait, how would you like it if you hadda be dragged around chained to some chick's skinny old ankle? No, no, hang on (I'm on a roll here!) -- how would you like it if you had negative post-it notes pinned to your body? Those things hurt! And how would you like it, knowing that everybody hated you? Including Lanre! The only person I know who doesn't hate me is Situation Man Lucius. He loves me, and I love him too. So there. At least you have bones. And at least you can take a shower. I tried that one time and wound up triple my/your size for three days.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
kircon 3239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
|
05-23-06, 02:08 PM (EST)
|
14. "My Darling Bathroom:" |
Plans are underway for you to become mine.Once you've read this please flush. 1. Filming at NBC will begin on the wildly popular Apocalypse series. They will be filming a F9 tornado played by a F1 in a Sumo suit. 2. F1 tornado is also disgruntled. 3. My brother's, ex-wife's, uncle's, step-half-nephew owns a flat bed truck. He is on his way here. He will park about a block away. 4. F1, will gently rip You,My Darling Bathroom from the foundation. 5. Doughboy is working on cutting the pipes with his knives. 6. F1 will gently place you on the flat bed. 7. Then we're off to my house and our new life together. The Disgruntled Editor is planning for this to be her push into stardom. I don't care one way or the other. I'm counting the days! Love you the most, Kelly P.S. I'll give you a good cleaning tonight. I have my toothbrushes.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
alaholly 497 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Daytime Soap Guest Star"
|
05-23-06, 02:41 PM (EST)
|
15. "RE: My Darling Bathroom:" |
<Antonia lying face down on couch trying to sleep wearing spanky new "BRAT" pants>"Mmmmph. Huh? WTF is that noise comin' from the bathroom? I'm tryin' to get some sleep he-yah. I think they are gonna make me *RUN* tomorrow for <bleep> sake and I'm TI-AD, TI-AD, TI-AD!" <Sees a blur rush past the window> "WTF???, was that that little piece of dough kid or was that Niambi running by without her crutches? I betta go check cuz I'm gonna need that Doughboy to sell on E-bay (whatevah that is) so I can make some cash. Money sure goes fast. But at least I am a GROWN A$$ businesswoman now."
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
alaholly 497 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Daytime Soap Guest Star"
|
05-23-06, 08:03 PM (EST)
|
18. "RE: Pssst Kelly" |
<Antonia is in the bathroom looking for her glasses, again>"Dammit. C'mon St. Anthony help me out he-yah. One more time, c'mon St. A. Pleeeeease!" <Looks under sink> "I'm so pi$$ed off. I thought for sure Stahtin' Ovah would give me some new glasses. Hey I graduated and all. I'm still tryin' to see out of those one arm bandits for <bleep> sake. Where the <bleep> are they?" <Hears a muffled "Kelllllly?" from inside box hidden under sink. Picks up locked box and carries it into house.> "WTF is this? Maybe Jill can help me pick the lock. Or Christie...I bet she has experience with that." <Vigorously shakes box. Hears a mumbled "Ow, ow, OW!"> "Cool. A talking box. I wonder how much I can get for this sucker?"
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Lanna42 263 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
|
05-24-06, 12:20 PM (EST)
|
28. "RE: Mah-tha?" |
LAST EDITED ON 05-24-06 AT 12:31 PM (EST)First of all,thank you for the nice compliments.Second of all,Antonia who do you think your dealing with here Emeril?I've made cranberry chutney out of TV exec's who were tougher than you.I made millions of dollars out of two copper pots,a pumpkin and an ex-husband who was so stupid he thought he was marrying Susie Homemaker.Boy,did he get a suprise. Third of all,Ladies do not kick peoples a$$e$.They threaten,coerce,manipulate,gossip and backstab until they've squeezed the last dollar out of their competitions pockets.Then they work 16 hour days until the only touch they remember is from their French Bulldog and their cat.(forces Antonia's arm behind her back and makes her sit down.)GOT IT? I told you if you didn't behave I was going to teach you a lesson.Repeat after me."Mar-tha.Not Mah-tha.Marrrrtha. Martha parked the car in the yard and taught the dimwit to enuciate. 1+1=2, NO, 1+1=2 NOT 4!! HOW DID THEY LET YOU OUT OF THE SECOND GRADE? MARTHA STEWART,CEO OF MARTHA INC. STRIP SEARCHES,THEIR NOT A GOOD THING
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
alaholly 497 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Daytime Soap Guest Star"
|
05-24-06, 08:14 PM (EST)
|
37. "RE: Mah-tha?" |
LAST EDITED ON 05-24-06 AT 10:02 PM (EST)"Hmmm. Now WTF happened to my gold sequined bag? Dammit I paid $1.99 for that thing...well that was befoh I got my graduation money and could buy the good stuff. But I need THAT bag 'cuz it has a *er* special bottom on it for *er* shoppin' those special sales. Jill has one just like it." "St. Anthony don't fail me now!!" <Goes to room to pack for her departure. Opens closet and begins laying things out on bed to put in suitcase.> "Let's see now, I got my long sleeved pink t-shirts, my tight gold jacket, Richard's tank tops and shorts, a sample of Dr. Stan's beard hair for good luck, Christie's pants to use as a bedspread for my new room, Rhonda's *er* my new jewelry, Mr. Jon's I mean MY credit card, and Niambi's phone number. I guess that's it. (Throws Jodi's love note and phone # in waste basket) What am I forgetting? Oh yeah, that little Doughboy. Now where the <bleep> is he?"
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
kircon 3239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
|
05-25-06, 04:16 AM (EST)
|
38. "RE: Mah-tha?" |
Oh Martha! I am your biggest fan. Would you please sign my toilet brush. I got it at KMART! I just love all your cleaning hints. I'm adding on a new bathroom. Any ideas?Thanks! **Kelly notices Martha has Antonia's purse* I will hang on to this information as an insurance policy. Thanks Universe! Here's a shout out to you.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
Lanna42 263 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
|
05-25-06, 09:04 AM (EST)
|
39. "So long and happy baking suckers!!" |
LAST EDITED ON 05-25-06 AT 09:31 AM (EST)LAST EDITED ON 05-25-06 AT 09:07 AM (EST) (PBDB Hops into Antonia's sequined purse just as Martha picks it up and walks out the door.As,they leave he drops a flurry of tiny little notes of goodbye to everyone.Well,almost everyone.) They read as follows: Kelly: I'm sorry I couldn't stay longer.Thanks for everything.I scraped all the grout and cut all the pipes in your DB for you.That thing should pop right out now.Enjoy!! Antonialease leave me alone.I've been threw enough and by the way,St.Anthony's voice was me from behind the shower curtain. Jon Murray:I'm made of chemical goo and Dr. Stans hair clippings.Nuff said. Dr.Stan:Thanks for the hair and the lingering smell of lighter fluid.It wasn't exactly Locks Of Love but what the hell. Buddha:You were a ten buddy.We'll always have the garden.Who knows, in another time ,another place.And I'd get that sonogram checked out.Something funny is going on with that thing. Jodi:I really have no forwarding address. The rest of you can kiss my dough!! Not literally!! RUN MARTHA!!!!! RUN,RUN,RUN FOR THE LOVE OF GOD RUN!!!! PILLSBURY DOUGHBOY,FORMER SPOKESMAN MADE OF DOUGH,UNLIKE ANTONIA
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
BlowingOver 143 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
05-30-06, 03:49 PM (EST)
|
91. "RE: So long and happy baking suckers!!" |
LAST EDITED ON 05-30-06 AT 07:43 PM (EST)How many times do I have to tell you? IT'S NOT MY NOSE HAIR, IT'S RHONDA'S!!!! :: presses Dough Boy into clumps of facial fur :: :: Doughboy disappears instantly :: THIS, on the other hand, is my hair . . . ::sinister laugh::
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
05-24-06, 10:44 AM (EST)
|
27. "Here's your cutie for the 5k!" |
Ooo, I can't wait for the 5k so all the viewers can see me in my cool new running suit, and I can pretend to be kind and compassionate to all the former houseguests that I finally managed to dump dearly love. What a day of promise and opportunity!*runs to look in mirror and poses, admiring herself* *practices concerned, compassionate sneer* *practices determined, hard-working sneer* *practices sneery look of joy and jubilation for when Christie crosses the finish line* Mirror, mirror, on the wall, Who is the most beautiful runner of all? You are, of course, Miss Rhonda, as long as you do not allow your face to melt in the sun. Gracie...take a memo....make sure to order 20 10 lb. bags of ice for me to use during commercials. And add to the list to bring the Emmy. I will be able to do my jubilant look SO much better if I can see that dangling before me. Oh, Great BM, I do believe we need a conference today to finalize our positions where to position everyone for the race. My place...in my mirror room...in about three hours? (I have to finish my mirror and makeup time first.) Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
kircon 3239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
|
05-24-06, 04:09 PM (EST)
|
30. "RE: Here's your cutie for the 5k!" |
*strolling by with her pack of cigs*Yo Rhonda! Can I hitch a ride with ya? You know what amuses me? I heard every 7 minutes of every day, someone in an aerobics class pull a hamstring. *lighting cigarette* Yo Rhonda, where's the ashtray? *flicks ash on floor* There are so many young things in this house it makes me nervous. Us,old chicks have to stick together. *puts cig in mouth and claps Rhonda on the back* See ya downstairs.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
05-25-06, 04:57 PM (EST)
|
54. "RE: Here's your cutie for the 5k!" |
*cough* *cough*Oh, Maureen, I know you are probably worried about a secure future with the Starting Over House being in limbo. I want you to know and be assured that your cardboard box is not going anywhere. Love, Rhonda Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
sharnina 3075 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
|
05-24-06, 05:24 PM (EST)
|
34. "RE: Here's your cutie for the 5k!" |
From Rhonda: "Oh, Great BM, I do believe we need a conference today to finalize our positions where to position everyone for the race."Yeaahhh, about that - uuhh, I don't think we will be having any more "conferences" to discuss "positions" of any sort. You did hear that the show has been cancelled, right. And besides, I need to spend some time getting to know that luscious Megan Mullally. Yeah, she's really hot going to be big in the fall. Don't call me, I'll have my people talk to your people.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
05-25-06, 05:38 PM (EST)
|
56. "RE: Here's your cutie for the 5k!" |
*sirens wailing* *horns honking**bang bang bang* Is anybody there? HELLO???? Hello, ma'am...or is it sir...your name is Jodi? We received a call concerning a woman with a possible head injury. *run run run* Oh, there she is, Mike, we found her! Ma'am? Ma'am? MA'AM????? *on radio* Dispatch, we have an unconscious female here, approximately 45 years old, with washed-out stringy blonde hair, petite in size. Her color is very pasty white and waxy-looking, with no facial movements visible. She appears to be in great pain by the indications of the scowl on her face. She has some blood loss due to a gash in her head, and she is lying in a pool of blood and broken mirrors. We shall attempt to transport her right away. *puts down radio* Okay, ma'am, we are going to take care of you. Okay, guys, let's get her out of this mess. Mike, you try to get the glass out of her head, and I'll try to free her grip from this string of beads. I am having trouble unclutching her fingers. Hmmm, they say "I love me?" That is rather odd. Oh, she is trying to speak...what is that, ma'am? Can you tell what she is murmuring, Mike? Oh, now I know...it sounds like Jon-Boy, Jon-Boy, ratings, camera time. I wonder if she thinks she is a Walton. This makes no sense. I think this must be a serious head injury. Okay, ma'am, we are going to give you something for your pain. Now what is she saying...Emmy, Emmy. I see an Emmy award lying here on the floor. Even with her eyes closed, she gets a much more peaceful look every time I bring it close to her. That is remarkable! Let's just go with the Emmy instead of the pain meds. *lift Rhonda onto stretcher* Don't worry, ma'am, you are going to be fine. We're going to a place where you can rest and get some help. Don't get upset. Jon-Boy is not here. Oh, I hear him, ma'am, he says "Good night." Mike, I think she may need help for more than a head injury, if you know what I mean. Oh, thank you, Jodi, for the masterful way you picked up that stretcher and hauled it yourself. Yes, woman with the bleached blonde hair, if it means that much to you, you may ride with her to the hospital. *sirens blaring* *honk* *honk* *honk* The EMS
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
Anne18 239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
|
05-25-06, 09:07 PM (EST)
|
58. "RE: Here's your cutie for the 5k!" |
Hey, don't you call me bleached blonde!! My hair is real! Got it? Okay... Oh, Rhonda HUGS!! You will be all right!! I will never leave your side. NEVER! We can have our slumber party in the ER. I already called ahead and they said yes.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
Anne18 239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
|
05-25-06, 02:41 PM (EST)
|
42. "RE: Here's your cutie for the 5k!" |
Yes, I agree with you, Rhonda. Yes, mmm hmmm, yeah. Right. Nods head. Yep. That is right, Antonia. Yes. Mmmm hmmmm. Nods head. Yes, she was mean to me but now she likes me! Smiles. That is what she is saying. I hope the camera is on me. I just can't have no contact with Rhonda! I must be her best friend somehow, someway. We are best friends. How am I going to go on without her and being on the show. OK I will tell you who my son is....You waited long enough ... it is... it is...Clay Aiken! Yes! Mmm hmmm. Yep, that is him. Have you seen my son on American Idol? Yes, I know his hair was horrible... I told him to insist people do not touch his hair!!!!!
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
05-25-06, 05:11 PM (EST)
|
55. "RE: Here's your cutie for the 5k!" |
Oh, Cassie dear,(Oh, excuse me...are the cameras rolling? Yes? Thanks, Scott.) *puts arm around Cassie* Don't worry, hon, you always have a special place in my heart. You are my girl, and when you are in trouble, I will always be there for you. *big hug* *voice from behind* Okay, that's a wrap! Let's go get some good shots of Niambi from behind. Okay, cameras are now off....Why in the heck do you ever think you could be my friend, you bleached blonde bimbo with the brain of a worm who actually thinks she can run her own business? Just because we are both alcoholics is not any reason to think that I actually like you. Yeah, you found your son, and he has made it big and can support you now, don't you know? I thought if I found your son, you would be out of my hair forever. *sigh* Don't cry, Cassie...you know it always gets me when you cry...and I can't cry because I can't move my face that much. I'm sorry...Hey, we'll have a girlie slumber party tonight, okay? We'll paint each other's toenails and do each other's hair and then see how it looks in all the different mirrors. Geez, why am I such a softie? Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
alaholly 497 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Daytime Soap Guest Star"
|
05-25-06, 09:55 AM (EST)
|
40. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
<Antonia is sitting at the computer with a puzzled look on her face. Jodi is seated next to her with her arm around Antonia.>"Okay Jodi so tell me again WTF is E-bay? I'm just not gettin' it he-yah. I need to get some QUICK cash for these striped shorts and sequined tank tops that I uh, borrowed from Richard Simmons. And I need it in a freakin' hurry already. That cash I got for graduation didn't last long. Do ya like my new jacket?" <Jodi patiently explains, again, how E-bay works while stroking Antonia's hair. She is demonstrating how to find items on line when suddenly Antonia shrieks.> "Hey!!! WTF?!!! That is MY sequined handbag, right THEY-AH (points to screen). I'd know that secret compartment on the bottom anywhey-ah! <Bleep bleep bleepity bleep> Mah-rrrr-tha. She scares me, that girl. <Rubs arm> Okay so Jodi WTF do we do now? You got any money honey? Can you supp-o-what me too? I'm as cute as Christie. And dammit. I want my bag back!" <Eyebrows form into a pout and frosty lips begin to quiver.>
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
alaholly 497 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Daytime Soap Guest Star"
|
05-25-06, 03:17 PM (EST)
|
46. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread-COUGH!" |
<Peers through cloud of smoke, coughs, rubs eyes>"Oh hey Big Mama Mo. Great to see ya hon. You look great! <brows twitch uncontrollably> Uh, you lost some weight? Love those giant sweatpants. <Clears throat> Say, can I borrow 20 bucks? I need to buy my purse back on freakin' eBay." <Andy runs by through the smoke in skin-tight black spandex running pants. Antonia and Maureen shout in unison> "WTF? MY EYES! MY EYES!!!"
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
kircon 3239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
|
05-26-06, 04:52 AM (EST)
|
61. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread-COUGH!" |
What's your name again? I'm here to try to get some money myself. I had a fire at my apartment. I still need to furnish my bedroom and kitchen. *takes a drag on her cigarette* *blows several smoke rings* I hear you're a poet. I'm into stand-up. Have you seen the golf cart around. I'd like to ride for a while. You heard of this Ebay thing. Think you could teach me about it. Well not that I need to be taught, but I've never done it before. *shouts* Hey, over here! I want to ride! Later Chickie-poo.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
SO_love 8 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "American Cancer Society Spokesperson"
|
05-25-06, 03:33 PM (EST)
|
49. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
Niami, the rules don't apply to me because I have proven myself. I have shown that I have compassion. So now obviously the show should focus on me because of my accomplishments.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
05-25-06, 04:34 PM (EST)
|
50. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
Just a question....who are you?
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
JavaT 189 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
05-25-06, 09:56 PM (EST)
|
59. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
LAST EDITED ON 05-25-06 AT 09:57 PM (EST)Well, Jon Boy, speaking of recognizing, do you recognize the name Andy Paige? And this little snapshot, by any chance? Jonathan Murray, you ARE the father! *Audience goes wild! Erupts into hooting, hollering, cheering, jeering, and gasps of shock and surprise!*
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
alaholly 497 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Daytime Soap Guest Star"
|
05-26-06, 10:42 AM (EST)
|
62. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 16" |
<Antonia and Niambi are taking a jog around the block before leaving the SO house. Antonia is wearing her BRAT pants with the word written across the seat. Niambi is wearing pants with the words "Kiss My A$$" across the back>"Why do those camera men keep following us?!? It's stahtin' to really pi$$ me off. Why don't they EVAH follow Jill, Jodi, or even Christie for <bleep> sake? It was HER run aftah all." <Looks over shoulder to see several men with cameras zeroing in on their "outfits."> <Suddenly sees Lisa1 running nearby with "Juicy" written on her pants waving wildly at cameras. Camera men shut off cameras and rush to leave in a big hurry. There is loud squealing as the production van races away> "WTF???"
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
BlowingOver 143 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
05-30-06, 03:53 PM (EST)
|
92. "RE: congrats!" |
Speaking of Mutant Cuties . . .::presses Doughboy back in jungle of facial hair:: Silence! Get used to it, Buddy, you are starting over HERE.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
05-26-06, 04:00 PM (EST)
|
64. "HELP ME!!!! I'M RHONDA!!!!!!" |
HELP!!!!! Somebody help!!!!! Cassie??????I need to get out of here...I need someone to vouch for my sanity! After my head injury, which I have no memory of getting, the ER doc insisted on sending me here to Psych. PLEASE take these restraints off!!!! And get out of here with that straitjacket...you know I brought my own. They keep telling me I am not a Walton, and John-Boy does not love me. I tried to explain who the real Jon-Boy is, and they would not believe me. They wouldn't believe that I have been dumped for Megan Mulally, and that I won an Emmy...*sob* *sob* They say that I am delusional. PLEASE, somebody, tell them the truth! They won't believe Cassie, either...I think they think we are in a relationship, as she was painting my toenails purple while I was on the gurney. IYANLA!!!! Please come and cast a spell on them for me...BUDDHA, my special friend, please send karma to bite them in the butt....JODI, please come manhandle them for me...SOMEBODY HELP!!!!!!! Miss Britten, it is time for your medicine. Shhh....We'll tell Pa Walton to come get you, that's right! *whimper* *whimper* Cassie? Please hold my mirror for me. I love me, I love me, I love me....Zzzzzzzzz..... Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
05-27-06, 01:42 PM (EST)
|
75. "RE: HELP ME!!!! I'M RHONDA!!!!!!" |
Okay, I'm up...I was so tired this morning after all that hospital mess. And wow, do I have a headache! I'll need you later, tissues, when I tell everyone my story of what happened...*sniff* *sniff**reaches into box* Oh, my goodness! Thank you so much, Martha! I can't wait to use this to get back at Jonny....He really is the ultimate BM. *giggles* Thanks for the recipe. *rubs hands together in glee* Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
05-27-06, 01:34 PM (EST)
|
74. "RE: HELP ME!!!! I'M RHONDA!!!!!!" |
Oh, Martha, thank you SO much for getting me out of that looney bin! Yes, I saved my hospital mementos for you. It will be fun to make a lovely champagne fountain from the emesis basin and bedpan, and to paint beautiful flowers on the plastic water pitcher. Oh, I just love the way you are decorating my straitjacket with buttons and lace...so stylish! I promise to save my stitches for you, and we can incorporate them into a lovely decoration around my mirror. Hey...do you think it is okay to leave Cassie there for a couple of days? It is really nice to be able to breathe for a change and not hear her blubbering about her son. Hey, I hear that DeBORah really is looking for a job. As long as you can put up with her threatening to leave every ten minutes...but Tess may be better suited to you, as she is already perfect. Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
kircon 3239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
|
05-28-06, 05:00 AM (EST)
|
85. "Hey Cassie!" |
Just remember depression is merely anger without enthusiasm, but on the other hand, you have different fingers.*takes a drag on cigarette* *blows out smoke rings* *sets cigarette on Cassies bedside table*
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
Anne18 239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
|
05-28-06, 10:50 AM (EST)
|
86. "RE: Hey Maureen!" |
LAST EDITED ON 05-28-06 AT 10:52 AM (EST)Maureen, THANK YOU for coming to see me! You are like a mother to me, did I ever tell you that? Please do not smoke. Smoking is dangerous to your health and mine! I can't stay here! Get me out! PLEASE! I promise not to blubber about MY SON anymore and I promise not to punch Martha Stewart! She better not be Rhonda's bestest friend by now! Rhonda, I will do anything for you so if I need to stay here one more day I will do it for you. **Sigh** Martha Stewart is not the happy person...it's me! Yes, Maureen. I know...anger is not good...no thanks. Don't need a cigarette. *SIGH*
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
Anne18 239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
|
05-27-06, 01:40 AM (EST)
|
67. "RE: HELP ME!!!! I'M RHONDA!!!!!!" |
LAST EDITED ON 05-27-06 AT 01:44 AM (EST)LAST EDITED ON 05-27-06 AT 01:42 AM (EST) Bestest friend, Rhonda!! Don't you worry about a thing! I'm right here! Remember when I said that I will never leave you alone? Here I am and always will be. HUGS!!! Hospital people, hello. My name is Cassie and this is my best friend, Rhonda. She won an Emmy, yes she did. Show them your picture (with the Emmy) in your wallet, Rhonda. Rhonda is VERY smart and VERY nice! She doesn't belong here in the psych ward!!!!!! You hear me???!?!?!? HAH?? OH MY GOD! (Said like the actress from Friends) It's IYANLA! AND she's SMILING!! omg omg I'm going to faint! Where is Dr. Stan? Where is Jill?? Antonia, tell them Iyanla's the crazy one! Come on, Antonia, you tell it like it is, remember? (Cassie tries not to cry.) PS, Martha... get your hands off my Rhonda!!
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
catmama 0 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "New Member"
|
05-27-06, 03:31 AM (EST)
|
68. "*flush*" |
LAST EDITED ON 05-27-06 AT 03:31 AM (EST)ok, kelly. i think dough boy did get me all loosened from the side of the house. i did notice, though, that upon my release from the foundation, there were bones sticking out of the cold, damp earth. BONES! i think i was built on top of an indian burial ground! that would explain a lot, come to think of it- i mean, we've had drumming, feathers, lots of smoke signals, and none of the hg's can handle their firewater. oh, and i almost forgot the beads! yes, it's all making much more sense now! anyhow, snookybum, i am waiting for you and your arsenal of toothbrushes. i think if we somehow get maureen to blind everyone with massive clouds of smoke, we'll be able to get away, and be together, forever, at last! oh, and if it's not too much, could you bring along the dining room table and the fridge? we could all be like permanent hg's- it'd be like "starting over- rancho cucamonga"! oh, yeah, maybe you should have that oldest boy of yours run out for some bon ami, just in case. i'll be waiting for that flatbead!
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
Lanna42 263 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
|
05-27-06, 10:22 AM (EST)
|
70. "*flush*" |
(in a billowy haze of smoke a stranger enters)Hello.......I am Char.TV psychic.Knower the unknown.Seer of the unseen.etc. etc.A restless spirit has called me here.(goes to Kelly's bathroom)It has a message for all of you.Speak to us spirit.Tell us your problem.(gasps and begins choking herself)Speaks in a low,mysterious voice. I AM GREAT CHIEF RUNAMUCK OF THE MAKE A BUCK TRIBE.BUNIM/MURRAY BUILT THEIR HOUSE ON OUR BURIAL GROUNDS.IN RETALIATION I PLACED A CURSE ON ALL WHO WOULD DARE ENTER HERE.THEY WOULD CIRCLE BACK ENDLESSLY LIKE THE GREAT EAGLE SEEKING PREY.AND I MEAN ENDLESSLY UNTIL YOU JUST WANT TO VOMIT.OR GAIN A TON OF WEIGHT.AND IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME JUST WATCH THE FINALE.OR BE FORCED INTO VOICEOVER WORK IN WOMEN'S SHAVING COMMERCIALS.OR BE FORCED TO DO HUMILIATING EXERCISES.WITH NO PURPOSE WHATSOEVER.EXCEPT TO ENTERTAIN ME. TO SUFFER WITH NO ONE TO COMFORT THEM EXCEPT FOR JODI.ENDLES,ENDLESS,STROKING BY JODI. A HA HA A HA HA....... The spirit has left us.My bill will be in the mail. 25 cents first five minutes.After that 10$ a minute.Adults only please. Char leaves. CHAR,TV PSYCHIC YOU DON'T KNOW THE FUTURE,BUT I DO
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
alaholly 497 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Daytime Soap Guest Star"
|
05-27-06, 12:01 PM (EST)
|
71. "WTF?!?" |
<Antonia is staring at the gaping hole in the wall of the Starting Over House where the bathroom used to be. Her mouth is hanging open and her eyebrows have risen to an astonishing height>"WTF?!? WTFFFF!!! I have really got to stop sampling Christie's secret punch recipe. That punch always makes me feel a little funny. I think I am seein' things heyah!" <Squints and looks through haze> "Hey is that my girl Char? Hey girl. Can ya help me with those lottery numbas now? I need some serious cash honey. I know I still owe ya for that time ya tried to find me a rich husband. But that guy turned out to be a deadbeat, ya know, so I think we're even. Got some numbas for me, hon?"
Can I have what's in YOUR wallet?
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
alaholly 497 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Daytime Soap Guest Star"
|
05-27-06, 08:20 PM (EST)
|
80. "RE: Adult clients?" |
"Ooh, ooh, me too, me too! I can always use some more money. Daddy's threatening to cut me off. I'm really good on the phone (as long as I don't have to get out of my chair) and men LOVE me!" <Bats eyes, giggles, and wiggles skinny butt> "I can't seem to sell any of these beautiful earrings anyway...and I worked very, very hard on them." <big pout> "Plus I can talk my way out of ANYTHING. Right, Rhonda?" I'm baa-ack... again.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
Anne18 239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star"
|
05-30-06, 05:58 PM (EST)
|
93. "RE: HELP ME!!!! I'M RHONDA!!!!!!" |
Dr. Stan!! Did you think those were poems? Those were poems from MY SON! He wrote them when he was younger. Cassie
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
kircon 3239 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
|
05-27-06, 01:52 PM (EST)
|
77. "Freedom!" |
*Kelly and her brother's, ex-wife's, uncle's, step-half-nephew who owns a flat bed truck, are searching the sky*Is that it? *jumping up and down* It's coming! WHOOOMPP*dust settles* My Darling Bathroom! Speak to me! *climbs onto the flatbed and opens the door* My Darling Bathroom, speak to me. My brother's, ex-wife's, uncle's, step-half-nephew who owns this truck is strapping you down. He's then going to cover you with a tarp. Speak to me. *yelling to her brother's, ex-wife's, uncle's, step-half-nephew* Do you have it strapped down? Now cover it with the tarp. Quickly!!! *climbing into the cab and hauling two giant bags from behind the duct-tapped seat* *climbing back into the bathroom* How are you doing? Brother's, ex-wife's, uncle's, step-half-nephew says "Goter Done" *screaming* Then get out of here! I'm riding with My Darling Bathroom. *rrrrrrrr BANG RRRRRR BANG BANG puff of black smoke* We're off and free My Darling Bathroom.
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
catmama 0 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "New Member"
|
05-27-06, 10:34 PM (EST)
|
84. "RE: Freedom!" |
good thing char used her powers of telekinesis to get me on to the flatbed! (not to mention, prying jodi from the fridge- there's still a bit of steam left from her having that face pressed against it- and moving it and the dining room table in me, too!). ah, it's nice, the breeze in my tile and curtains. kim's stash of booze is still here, as you well know, and we can par-ty tonight, to celebrate my "starting over" at your house. the fridge was fully stocked, but as i said, jodi was trying to become one with it, you could say, so i can't vouch for it's contents at this time. i see that maureen is still puffing away- good work with leaving that pack of marlboros glued to the cement there! she could be there for days, trying to pry it off. maybe tomorrow, if you feel like, you could bring buddha home, too? i know, you aren't running a home for wayward rooms/appliances/holy statuary, but i would just feel terribly naked without him. pretty please
tonight, i'm gonna rock out with my grout out!
|
Remove |
Alert |
Edit |
Reply |
Reply With Quote | Top |
| |
|
p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e -
p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e -
p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e -
p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e -
|
|