LAST EDITED ON 06-02-06 AT 00:46 AM (EST)Lounging on the sofa, John and Paula are having a talk about her therapy sessions.
John confessional: "I think the fact that Paula is in therapy right now is working wonders for her. She is finally going to be able to start making changes to better herself."
John asks her if she has talked to her doctor about killer Keith yet.
"No, thats a whole other ball of wax" Paula says.
Paula is looking for advice on whether or not what killer Keith did to her could or should be forgivable.
She IS impressed with Johns caring and sympathetic ear. She doesn't remember the time he carried her off to bed and tucked her in, ...oh wait a minute...... was that the time she passed out drunk, in the telephone room?
John tells Paula that talking to her is exhausting. Exhausting? What will be exhausting is the next time Walnuts gets drunk and flips out, explaining the
caliber of excellance of the womanhood of life, or something like that... Exhausting is when the beotch insults you to your potential dates, then steals them from you, proclaiming her new lesbian cravings! Exhausting, is when this psychopathic, anorexic, dizzy bitch calls everybody @§§hÓle§, and describes your life story as... 'I got a small wiener'!
The next scene is in the 'Mystic Tan Salon', where we see John trying out the spraying room in his birthday suit. John is told to not open the door for any reason! But what does he do, first thing after the tan gets sprayed on? Anybody wanna guess? He 'accidently' opens the door, much to the amusement of everyone except Tyler, who seems insulted by the fact that John just HAS to vie for the attention that only Tyler himself has patents to.
Now let me get this straight.... no pun intended.
The only person there, out of the eight of them, that doesn't enjoy a peek at John's naked booty.....
is the gay guy? To me, this doesn't make sense, unless Tyler has some uncovered issues.... (another no pun intended) 
We see Zach and Jose get the spray treatment. I feel sorry for the editors of this show, because when Jose got his naked bootie sprayed, they had to blur some kind of demographic copyright written on the wall.... in front of him. Maybe it was a beer ad. Yeah, thats it.... and they had to blur the beer bottle out that was on the wall in front of his crotch! Don't you just hate those blurs?
In the car, on the drive home, Tyler is talking about John and jokingly asks "Who does this guy think he is?" He is beside himself with the fact that John has stole some limelight from what is supposed to be on him only.
Svetlana confessionals that John is a "goofy goofy guy", and just wants to have fun. "I don't mind laughing with him or at him, but that bothers Tyler alot, because Tyler likes to be in the spotlight, and when he's not in his spotlight, he doesn't want anybody else in it."
Tyler tells the girls that he's a better person than John. At the house he continues his tyrade of backstabbing, directing all karma towards John Hatred!
Tyler: "Basically, Johns motivation each day is to eat food, sleep, and have sex. He's basically a Neanderthal, with a brain the size of a pea!" "Most people," Tyler continues, "would find him egregiously obnoxious."
Well, my, my, isn't Tyler good with the long @§§ words. What the heck does egregiously mean anyway? Does that mean, like, very obnoxious? Or does that mean, like, volcanic eruption, nuclear explosion obnoxious?
Paula tries to defend John by saying "We should just respect each other more." Oh, please, .....Pot meet Kettle. Isn't this the same Paula Walnuts that calls everybody @§§hÓle§, and
insults everybodys Oscar Meyers?
Tyler then goes to talk to Jose, and they sit, talking, on the dock of the bay, watching the tide.... rollin away...
Tyler is still dissin Johnny Bananas, and Jose has been trapped into Tylers little pi§§y hi§§ tyrade of backstabbing.
Tyler calls John "exacerbating".... there's another of them long @§§ words again. What is up with Tylers vocabulary? I looked exacerbating up in the dictionary, and it says it means
annoying, or irritating. So why doesn't he just say.... "John is annoying." or "John is irritating." ?
Later that night, Svetlana tells John of Tylers backstabbing ways, leaving John wondering why Tyler talked smack about him rather than confront him face to face.
The next day, Paula gets a package from Keith, filled with several bags of Paulas favorite Walnuts Peanuts, and an expensive bottle of Paulas favorite wine.
Paula calls Keith to tell him how exited she is about her package. "I'm gonna keep the bottle forever" she tells him.
Keith asks her if she misses him NOW? She wonders if she should save it for when he comes down to visit.
Our next scene is Tyler talking to Jose. "Svetlana took it upon herself to tell John everything that was said in the car."
Tyler confessional: "I'm furious with Svetlana, because she's trying to plant a bad seed, and pit us against each other."
I got news Tyler..... you did it all yourself. If you ask me, and even if you don't ..... you should have went to John, and told him what you thought of him, face to face, about taking your spotlight away from you. That's what this is all about isn't it? John getting crazy at the tanning salon? Whats the matter with your head? Don't you know how to have some fun? Someone needs to ask Tyler if
he rides eastern style on that high horse of his!
Tyler starts working his brain to try to dig up a "maniacal way to exacerbate Svetlana." There's that word again.
Who uses that word? What is he trying to prove with words that .... NOBODY IN THE REAL WORLD USES!
Tyler then declares this situation as
Operation Bitch Takedown, and decides to
drop kick Svetlanas @§§ over the boatdock, where he saw some hungry killer whales swimming around, looking for a snack.
Tyler confronts John:
Tyler: "We need to talk because, someone has taken it upon themselves to talk for us."
John: "Oh, this is gonna be a long night dude." John then belches burp code to Zach. Zach understands this straight code talk, nods his head, and leaves the room.
John confessional: "With me and Tyler, there have been many flare ups in the past that have been unresolved."
Tyler tells John, "Its certain information has been leaked to me that she's been exacerbating certain comments, and by the time it gets to where I talk to you, it's gone through 8 other people."
Theres that word again. Can somebody just please shoot Tyler?
John asks him why is it that he can't just pull him aside, and resolve our differences?
Tyler says that, in a college setting, whenever he has a conflict with a person, he usually bounces ideas off of other peoples heads before he confronts the person he has a problem with.
ummm.... isn't that code for.... backstabbing?
Tyler tells John, "In this situation, how do I resolve these issues? Who am I supposed to talk to?"
"Me, dude!" John tells him.
John: "Even though I come off as some kind of @§§hÓle, I just want to have a good time, and that's not all of who or what I am."
John makes a lot of sense till he starts smoking that funny looking cigarette he's waving around. Did you guys see that cigarette? Um.........
John then proceeds to make no sense in his next 5 comments.
"I'm just here to learn dude."
"I'm just here to hang out and have a good time dude."
"At the same time, I'm like, I wanna you know, change, dude."
"It's cool, dude."
"I'm just like..... free Willy, Dude!"
Tyler then tells John "This isn't an issue between me and you. This is that bitch Svetlana, instigating situations between other peeps in the house, and now .....
I'm gonna make the bitch pay.
John just shakes his head, knowing full well that this situation WAS between himself and Tyler, and now Tyler is trying to divert the blame to Svetlana. Tyler..... You are beginning to be exacerbating.....
Meanwhile, Paula is looking forward to her violent boyfriend coming down to Key West to visit, but finds that he cannot stay the night. She calls him on the phone, boo-hooing to him that the production crew, and fellow roomies, do not want to put him up for the night. Well, who could really blame them?
After Paula cries on the phone to Keith about him not being able to spend the night, Svetlana tries to comfort her. In her comfort she manages to sneak the fact in, that Tyler is the one who doesn't want Keith to be able to stay at the house.
"TYLER, SAID THAT?" Paula asks.
"Yes, he sure did!" Svet replies.
Paula gets back on the phone with her violent boyfriend to tell him that Tyler is the one that's responsible for him not being able to spend the night. She also mentions that Tyler is the "homosexual, who should be used to diversity." She makes sure her boyfriend knows how she feels about that (bleep) Tyler screwing up Keiths visit. She is letting her 'violent' boyfriend know that she now hates Tyler, and when he comes down, he will only have a few hours in the day to get to be with her, thanks to .... Tyler.
Meanwhile, Tyler has started a Burn Book. It's a book logging all of someone elses flaws, and in this case .... it's going to be all about Svetlana!
They log every diss they can think of from playing
'Spin the Bottle' to being a 'Hooters girl' to her allergies of
Lobster
Nuts
Onions
Latex
Sperm
Janelle
and Tyler........
Now who was it here that said this group was more mature than the Austin cast? Who? Come on... you know who you are! Step up... come on you can do it. LMAO
We end this episode with Tylers sinister little snicker, thinking about his little
Operation Bitch Takedown.
What will next week bring us. Will Keith drop kick Tylers @§§ over Shamu? Will Paula drink that expensive wine, get drunk, and flip out again? Find out next time on....
The Real World, Key West!
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Maybe it is because he is better than everyone else. 
