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"Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 - "This Is a Game for a Million Dollars, Not a Daytime Soap Opera""
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"Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 - "This Is a Game for a Million Dollars, Not a Daytime Soap Opera""

Survivor Live Excerpts: Charlie Forrest

The screen shows Dalton Ross and Jenna Morasca, hosts of Survivor Live, on a faux jungle background with a Survivor: All-Stars II logo.

Dalton: Helloooo again, Survivor fans, and welcome to another edition of Survivor Live. I'm your host, Dalton Ross, and with me as always is the lovely Jenna Morasca.

Jenna: Last night’s show was possibly the most heartbreaking episode of Survivor ever. I still think about how hard it was to leave the first All-Stars season because of my mother, but at least I had a good reason. The destruction of Charlie Forrest was the most senseless vote I’ve ever seen.

Dalton: Joining us today is the victim of the very upsetting decision last night.

The camera zooms back to show Dalton and Jenna as well as Charlie, who’s wearing a polo shirt with a Detroit Tigers insignia on it along with black slacks.

Jenna: Welcome to the show, Charlie.

Charlie: Thanks for having me, guys.

Dalton: First, I have to ask, how are you holding up?

Charlie: Not too well, Dalton. I watched the show last night with my son, and he was ready to leap through the TV screen and bash Danni’s head against a rock.

Jenna: And Cirie and Danni said your son had a crush on Danni.

Charlie: He did. I assure you, he doesn’t anymore. I actually had to calm him down because he was ready to go and hunt down Danni and dismember her. He doesn’t forgive anywhere near as easily as I do.

Dalton: So have you forgiven Danni?

Charlie: Not a chance in hell. The way Paula talked about me, though, I’m past that, and I hope she is, too.

Jenna: Are you on speaking terms with either Danni or Paula?

Charlie: Danni, no. Paula, yes. It’s very hard to talk to her knowing she’s still suspicious of me.

Dalton: After last night, she has to know you didn’t do anything.

Charlie: She does, but she doesn’t like that I put myself in that situation. I don’t really know how it happened myself. I do know that I haven’t touched alcohol since that night.

Jenna: That’s a big step, Charlie. Is this for Paula or just because you don’t feel like drinking beer anymore?

Charlie: Both, actually. I hope one day to be married to Paula and be the father that her children don’t have. And I really want Derek to have a mom, too.

Dalton: You have to know how Derek feels about Paula. On the show, he made it apparent he’s close to her, but after she called him worthless, what did he think?

Charlie: Unfortunately, Derek hates her now. He’s almost as mad at her as he is at Danni. He’s told me that he’s not coming to the reunion because he doesn’t want to end up in jail for killing them.

Jenna: Wow. It seems like your son’s taking this a lot harder than you are.

Charlie: I asked him to join me today on Survivor Live. He said he’d rather be murdered.

The Finale Begins – air date 5/18/2008

The camera pans to a vast array of islands in what appears to be the South Pacific. After showing a few nature shots, featuring a shimmering blue Pacific Ocean, a handful of atolls, and some small islands, the camera focuses in on an open area of the Pacific.

Jeff (voice-over): Thirty-six days ago, twenty veteran Survivors gathered in the Gambier island chain for a chance to play the game of a lifetime one more time. The seven most recent seasons were all represented by at least one Survivor.

The camera shows a view of all twenty Survivors in a boat; a particular focus is on Yau-Man, Sandra, and Charlie.

Jeff (voice-over): The beginning appeared very similar to the opening of Survivor: Palau.

Jeff: Some of you might recognize the setup here.

Ian: A little too well, Jeff.

Jeff: There are two necklaces waiting for you. One will go to the first man, and one to the first woman, who can reach shore and claim them.

Jeff (voice-over): In two close races, Tom and Maria claimed the immunity necklaces, and later, they learned how valuable these necklaces were.

Jeff: Tom and Maria will each be immune the first time they go to Tribal Council. That may be tonight or it may be days from now, but the first time Tom or Maria goes to Tribal, they are immune.

Jeff (voice-over): Ami began scheming right away to get Chris out.

Ami: So I talked to Chris, and he told me what his plans are.

Sandra: He just came out and told you?

Ami: Hey, he's actually a good friend of mine outside the show, but in the game, he's completely evil.

Danielle: I don't get it; what are you trying to tell me?

Ami: His plans include Rafe, Ozzy, and Terry. No girls in that group.

Jeff (voice-over): And she began sparring with Maria over hockey allegiance.

Ami: Don't tell me you're one of those damn front-runners.

Maria: Just rooting for the home team like we all do. It's not my fault my team's in first place and yours isn't.

(confessional) Maria: So wait a minute. My first rivalry on the island isn't about my nudity or about my gameplay or even my friendship with Charlie. It's about my hockey allegiance? Of all things for people to draw lines over.

Maria: Enjoy being out of the playoffs again.

(confessional) Ami: When that annoying little bitch from Buffalo gave me hell, it was on.

Jeff (voice-over): On the third day, the Survivors were split into tribes.

The camera shows a tribe consisting of Maria, Ami, Danielle, Paula, Sandra, Ian, Jonathan, Ozzy, Rafe, and Yau-Man, all wearing Ta'aroa blue.

Jeff: You guys are Ta'aroa.

The camera switches to the other tribe, consisting of Tom, Charlie, Chris, Terry, Yul, Cirie, Danni, Harriet, Parvati, and Twila, all wearing Fati silver.

Jeff: You guys are Fati.

Jeff (voice-over): And at the first challenge, Ami struggled.

The camera shows Ami failing to unhook her tribe’s raft.

Jeff (voice-over): And it cost her tribe.

Maria: What the hell?

Danielle: Rafe, I thought we had it!

Rafe: I did too! Who didn't get one!

Jeff: A problem with Ta'aroa! One hook was still latched! Make sure you have it!

Jeff (voice-over): With Ta’aroa struggling, Fati cruised to a victory.

Everyone on Fati grabs the raft to cros the line while Ta'aroa gets theirs unstuck and through. Everyone on Fati is across.

Jeff: Fati wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): The rules were laid out for every Tribal Council.

Jeff: For today, you will go back to Angakauitai, where you just came from. For the remainder of the day until Tribal Council, you will be able to search for a hidden immunity idol somewhere in the campsite. The first clue to the whereabouts of the idol will be waiting for you there.

Jeff (voice-over): At the neutral camp, the blame came down on Ami for losing the challenge.

Sandra: It's that motherf----- Ami who said she had a hook undone and didn't.

Jeff (voice-over): But Ozzy wanted to protect Ami.

Jonathan: If you mean the hook that wasn't free, that was Ami's fault, not Rafe's. Rafe got his unhooked.

Ozzy: I'm sure he told you that. He's lying.

Jeff (voice-over): And there were two other names kicked around for dismissal.

Ami: So I think the plan at this time is to vote off Yau-Man.

Paula: Why him?

Ami: He's useless in challenges, and I just see him getting too close to Ozzy and Jonathan.

Paula: I don't know...Sandra's a better bet to get rid of.

Jeff (voice-over): At Tribal Council, Sandra became the first person voted out of the game.

Jeff: Sandra, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Sandra's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): That night, Ta’aroa got to their new campsite, and Paula wanted to start building right away.

Paula: I don't know about you guys, but I think we need to get something going tonight; I don't care if it takes us all night.

Jeff (voice-over): But her plan caused dissention right away.

Danielle: Should we take a vote?

Ami: I'm for building the shelter now.

Maria: I don't like the idea.

Ami: That's because you're a whining crybaby who won't do any work.

Jeff (voice-over): At Fati, Yul didn’t want to get too cocky.

Danni (to the five mentioned): Hey guys, what's for breakfast?

Tom: The other tribe.

(confessional) Yul: It's nice to be a winner. But I'm afraid we're getting too cocky, and if we start acting like a bunch of punks, I'll have to rein the tribe in a bit.

Jeff (voice-over): The reward challenge tested the Survivors’ stomachs. Some failed miserably.

The camera shows Twila drinking cow’s blood quickly while Ami doesn’t touch it.

Jeff (voice-over): Jonathan and Terry got tested the most.

Jeff: Fafaru is probably the vilest substance we've ever served on Survivor. I know it smells the worst.

Terry: Do we have to bob for it?

Jeff: No, you can use your hands.

Jonathan: So my hands and my breath can smell like horse piss.

Jeff (voice-over): But Danni psyched Ian out, securing Fati’s second win in a row.

Danni immediately chugs her smoothie; Ian does the same. Danni begins to gag, however, and Ian pauses.

Jeff: Ian getting a little nervous! Danni might be getting sick!

Danni then resumes chugging, and before Ian knows what hit him, Danni sets her glass down and opens her mouth.

Jeff: Danni's done! Fati wins reward!

Jeff (voice-over): The fishing gear started a fight between Terry and Charlie.

Terry: Look, you don't need to be out there. Plain and simple. I will fish. You go do something else.

Charlie: I was the provider, too. We all were. You're just insisting on it because you're a stubborn jerk who thinks everything has to be your way.

Jeff (voice-over): And things turned personal quickly.

Terry: I deal with enough people to know when I'm right. I was right about the war, and I'm right about--

Charlie: Excuse me? The war? Don't even get me started on--

Terry: Don't tell me you're one of those damn peaceniks that thinks we need to get the hell out of--

Charlie: I know a bad idea when I see one--

Terry: And yet you still want to go fishing?

Jeff (voice-over): At Ta’aroa, the situation got dire.

(confessional) Yau-Man: On my season, we had to get up early to suck the water off the leaves. I think we will have to do the same again.

Jeff (voice-over): And the game’s first alliance came from Fati

(confessional) Tom: I am definitely aligned with Cirie. I would go all the way to the end with her, even if it means I lose.

Charlie (to Cirie): So the way I see it, you, me, Tom, and Danni all need to watch each other's backs. As long as we stick together, we can pretty well guarantee ourselves a good place in the game.

(confessional) Cirie: When Charlie approached me with an alliance proposition, I knew he was doing it for one reason, and that was to get Terry to scramble. Let's just say I don't have any problem with that idea.

Jeff (voice-over): At the immunity challenge, Charlie stayed one step ahead of his opponents.

Jeff: Fati down a boat as well! Ta'aroa back in it!

Rafe: OK, onto the next...wait, I can't steer.

Maria: Let me try...wait, why is it wet in here?

The three turn around to see Charlie standing and holding a grappling hook.

Charlie: Time's up, guys.

Jeff (voice-over): And with Ami’s help, Fati cruised to another immunity win.

Ami stands on the boat's edge to try to flip the Fati boat. As she does this, Chris pushes down on that edge and the boat flips over.

Jeff: Ami helps sink her own boat! Fati wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): At the neutral camp, the idol clue was difficult to solve for some.

Danielle (from clue): Like an actor turned real estate mogul, I have two Hotels and an Oscar. Between me and a cross one, count halfway and dig.

Ami: Huh? Is this clue even written in English?

Jeff (voice-over): But Paula figured it out right away.

(confessional) Paula: I solved it right away. Charlie and I did a lot of talking when we went out, and he explained the whole military alphabet. Two Hotels and one Oscar is really two H's and an O, meaning a water source.

Jeff (voice-over): Paula told Jonathan that she had the idol, but Jonathan spilled the beans.

Jonathan (to Yau-Man): Paula has the idol.

Yau-Man: Don't play games with me.

Jonathan: No, she really has the idol.

Jeff (voice-over): And Yau-Man wasn’t happy about it.

Yau-Man: No, really, don't play games with me. All you're doing is making yourself look bad by blabbing.

(confessional) Yau-Man: I know Paula, and I know she told Jonathan in confidence, and pretty soon, it will be all over camp.

Jeff (voice-over): At Tribal Council, Maria called out Ami for her poor performance.

Jeff: Is there any reason you guys can't get a break?

Maria: I can tell you why, Jeff. Someone in our tribe who shall remain nameless **sneeze**Ami**sneeze**

Jeff (voice-over): And when it came to Paula finding the idol, Yau-Man backed her up.

Yau-Man: Maybe someone finally found my fake idol.

The tribe, with the exception of Ami, chuckles at that.

Yau-Man: For what it's worth, if Paula found the idol, she hasn't told me. And I couldn't help but notice Ami's dead-serious tone when I said that. I think someone has a guilty conscience.

Ami: Maybe you're just not funny, Yau-Man.

Yau-Man: Maybe you left your sense of humor back at camp.

Jeff (voice-over): And it was Ami who paid the price.

Jeff: Ami, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Ami's torch.

Ami (shouting): You will NEVER win, Maria. NEVER.

Maria (smiling): I beat you. That's good enough for me.

Jeff (voice-over): The next day at Ta’aroa, everyone thought Ian broke his word.

Jonathan: Look, are you saying you didn't vote for Ami?

Ian: That's the honest-to-God truth. I voted Paula just like the plan was. I don't know who voted Ami besides the four in the other alliance.

Danielle: You better be telling us the truth.

Ian (exasperated): I am! If I were screwing you, you would know it!

Jeff (voice-over): And the need for fire reached desperation.

Paula: Yau-Man! Get over here and bring your glasses!

Yau-Man walks over to Paula and Rafe's fire pit.

Paula: Do whatever you did in Fiji to get a fire going.

Jeff (voice-over): And Paula used the immunity idol she claimed she didn’t have to make fire.

Paula: Times like this I wish my husband hadn't left me so I'd be bothered to wear my engagement ring. Now if only I had something that had a reflective face, like a watch...wait a minute.

Paula takes out her immunity idol; the idol has something small and reflective on it.

Paula: This ought to help out.

Paula bends the small, reflective stone on her immunity idol; Yau-Man uses his glases at the same time. A larger spark is generated, and immediately, the tinder starts burning.

Paula and Yau-Man exchange high-fives and begin putting bigger wood on the fire; it catches in time.

Jeff (voice-over): At Fati, Charlie and Terry mended fences.

Terry: I have a lot of things I believe in. But I guess other people do, too, and you have your reasons.

Charlie: Hey, four years ago, I thought it was a great idea to get rid of some bad guys over in the Middle East. But just because you're for the war and always have been, and I'm against it and mostly always have been, that doesn't mean we have to end up hating each other.

Terry: I can't hate you, Charlie. I respect you too damn much.

The two men shake hands and part ways.

(confessional) Charlie: Terry's an all right guy. I would go out and have a beer with him.

Jeff (voice-over): At the reward challenge, Ta’aroa finally got flint.

Jeff: You guys made a fire?

Paula: Yau-Man's glasses came in handy.

Jeff: Well, since you guys made fire on your own, you guys get flint for fire.

Jeff (voice-over): Charlie played dumb.

Maria: Charlie, do you have a bar of soap?

Charlie: What the hell's soap?

Maria: It's the little square thingy.

Charlie: Nope, nothing square in here.

Jeff (voice-over): And Parvati, having flirted with guys in the Cook Islands, decided to flirt with Maria here.

Maria: Parvati, do you have pumice?

Parvati: Come see for yourself.

Maria walks over to Parvati's box; as she arrives, Parvati shuts it.

Parvati: Not so fast, sugar. You'll have to wait until we're tribemates.

Jeff (voice-over): And she ended up topless.

Paula: I'm just amazed they both still have their clothes on.

Parvati is in just her red bikini; Maria is still in her orange tank top and navy blue shorts.

Parvati: I think someone wants to see more.

Parvati undoes her bikini top and hands it to Maria.

Parvati: That's yours to keep, baby.

Jeff (voice-over): And later naked.

Maria: Parvati, do you have a bikini bottom...I mean, toothpaste?

Parvati: For you, anything.

Parvati walks over to Maria's box, drops her bikini bottom, and hands her toothpaste over. Before Maria leaves, Parvati leans in to kiss her.

Maria: Easy, girl; not until we're tribemates.

Jeff (voice-over): Maria didn’t keep Parvati’s clothes, but they cemented a desire to be on the same tribe.

Maria hands back Parvati's bikini; Parvati leans in for a kiss, which Maria accepts.

Jeff (voice-over): Despite the win, Terry was unhappy with Parvati’s display at the challenge.

Terry (to Parvati): I don't think we want any more shows like that.

Parvati: Oh come on, Terry; I'm just having fun. I'm not gay and I wasn't planning on letting her keep my bikini.

Terry: I just think it might be a problem for challenges in the future. I don't want our performance to turn into a farce. We're winning; let's keep it that way.

(confessional) Parvati: Come on; we won! We're winning, and I don't see a problem with flirting a bit. It helped, and even if it didn't, it didn't hurt.

Jeff (voice-over): At Ta’aroa, Rafe and Ian were both sent to flip each other.

Ian: You know you're number four in their alliance.

Rafe: I was about to say the same to you.

Ian: So wait, your alliance sent you to swing me?

Rafe: I take it yours sent you to swing me.

(confessional) Rafe: Ozzy sent Ian to convince me to vote with them. At the same time, Paula sent me to swing Ian. And naturally, we got some ideas of our own.

Jeff (voice-over): Before the immunity challenge, Ozzy gave a rousing speech to fire up his tribe.

Ozzy: Today...we're no longer the loser tribe. We're no longer winless. We turn the tide and we make them choke on their arrogance. We're not going down this time! Today...is the day we end the losing and we go out and WIN! Today...is the day we wipe that smirk off Parvati's face and tell her to take her naked ass back to her own beach! We make Tom use that immunity necklace the way Maria had to use hers! We make them scramble for that immunity idol! We come back home after the challenge and we enjoy the evening while they get their asses grilled by Probst! Today we kill Fati!

Entire tribe (in perfect unison): KILL FATI!

Jeff (voice-over): Ta’aroa came out swinging against the favored Fati tribe.

Jeff: Twila wants to pull Fati even! She has to outrun Ozzy! Not too many people can!

Ozzy dashes back with a basket before Twila reaches the Attack Zone.

Jeff: Ozzy scores for Ta'aroa! His team's up four-two!

Jeff (voice-over): Fati got undisciplined, and four players got thrown out of the challenge.

Jeff: NO CHOKING, Terry! You're OUT! Paula gets a free pass!

Jeff: I said NO PUNCHING! Fati getting very undisciplined! Parvati's out!

Jeff: Last warning, guys! Clear the course!

Chris (also ignoring Jeff): Give it a rest already! We'll get those back!

Jeff: Chris! Tom! You've been warned! You're both out! Get back to the boat!

Jeff (voice-over): With a four-member advantage, Ta’aroa cruised to their first challenge win.

Jeff: Yul's down! Nothing stopping Maria now!

Maria scampers to the end and places the basket in her boat.

Jeff: That's ten! Ta'aroa wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): For the first time, Fati had to search for this immunity idol and make a decision about voting someone out. Two names came up.

Tom: I want Chris gone after that.

Cirie: Fine with me.

Chris: That challenge was a joke. I tripped Tom on accident, and we weren't winning anyway. I want Parvati out.

Jeff (voice-over): At Tribal Council, Parvati defended herself.

Jeff: One minute you're kissing Maria and giving her your clothes; the next, you're punching her in the arm. What gives?

Parvati: I did what the situation called for. At the immunity challenge, I wanted to fight.

Jeff (voice-over): And it worked; Chris was voted out of the game.

Jeff: Chris, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Chris' torch.

Jeff (voice-over): The next day, Ta’aroa was still celebrating, but they wanted another shot at Fati.

Ozzy: We all need to stick together. When we win, we all get along a lot better and I have more time to fish. We're better fed, we're happier, and we don't do stupid things like split the tribe in half.

Yau-Man: I am still enjoying that win yesterday.

Ozzy: I need to get some more frustration out, though.

Jeff (voice-over): The reward challenge gave them that opportunity.

Jeff: You guys will be playing an old-fashioned game of dodgeball.

Jeff (voice-over): Fati won the first match and had Ta’aroa down to just Yau-Man, but he battled back.

Jeff: Yau-Man has to take out both Tom and Charlie! No small feat!

Tom fires a rocket at Yau-Man; it bounces off his chest, in the air near Yau-Man, and Charlie fires one at him as well. Charlie misses, and Yau-Man catches Tom's throw.

Jeff: Yau-Man just completely changed the face of this challenge!

Jeff (voice-over): In the third and deciding match, Parvati and Maria decided to try to psych each other out, but Parvati paid the price.

Maria: I can't take you out, Parv; I love you too much.

Parvati: I love you too Maria--

Ozzy launches a cannon at Parvati; hitting her in the side. She goes down like a ton of bricks.

Ozzy (impersonating Ben Stiller): Joanie loves Chachi!

Jeff (voice-over): Ta’aroa had the upper hand, and they used it to seal their first reward.

Jeff: Tom's all alone with just a ball and a prayer! Can he pull a Yau-Man?

Ozzy: NO!

Ozzy launches his ball at Tom and hits him in the arm; Tom can't catch it in time.

Jeff: No indeed; Tom's down! Ta'aroa wins reward!

Jeff (voice-over): At Ta’aroa, Yau-Man and Jonathan tried to make Ozzy replaceable.

The camera shows Jonathan and Yau-Man carving a sharp stick, presumable to use while fishing.

Yau-Man: I call it Superpole 3000. A thousand times better than Superpole 2000.

Jonathan: I hope it's better; Superpole 2000 didn't catch anything.

Jeff (voice-over): And Charlie opened up to his tribe.

The camera focuses on Charlie’s left hand, which is missing two fingers, and then back to his tribe.

Terry: I know it's probably a sensitive subject, but what happened to your hand, Charlie?

Charlie: Well, if you must know...(sigh)...I lost these fingers in battle. I got shot in Grenada.

Harriet: I wondered that, but I was scared to ask.

Jeff (voice-over): And the next day, he poured his heart out to Danni.

Charlie: I have to be honest, and I don't want this to come between us or anything. Promise me that we're still allies and still in this together and everything--

Danni: You have my word.

Charlie: I just want to make sure this doesn't drive a wedge between us.

Danni: Come on, Charlie; nothing could do that. It's not like you're in love with me or anything.

Charlie looks up at Danni with a semi-worried look.

Danni: Oh my God...

(confessional) Danni: Charlie's been in battle, seen his best friend die before his own eyes, raised his son on his own, survived a heart attack, gotten a college degree at 44 years old, and, by all accounts, took a lot of hell from his boss. If there's one thing that scares him, it's telling a younger woman how he feels about her.

Jeff (voice-over): But Danni reciprocated.

(confessional) Danni: It helps when I feel the exact same way. It wasn't really love at first sight when I met Charlie, but it was definitely love at first chat.

Jeff (voice-over): The tribe didn’t pick up on Charlie being close to Danni, but they did pick up on his leadership status.

(confessional) Tom: It's not hard to miss that Charlie's basically the king of Fati. The women love him, and the guys either respect or fear him.

Jeff (voice-over): And at Ta’aroa, Maria had turned over a new leaf.

The camera shows Ozzy scaling a fish; Maria walks up behind him.

Maria: Hey, big guy. What's up?

Ozzy: Breakfast. You want to help?

Maria: What do I do?

Ozzy: You have to scale the fish like this--

Ozzy shows Maria how to scale a fish. Maria hangs over Ozzy's shoulders and does the same thing.

Jeff (voice-over): The immunity challenge came down to Yau-Man against Terry.

The camera shows both men trying to toss a ring around a hook.

As Terry's falls short again, Yau-Man's lands just around the grappling hook. He pulls, and the blue Ta'aroa flag rises.

Jeff: Ta'aroa wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): At the neutral camp, over half the tribe was a target for the vote.

Parvati: Well, the alliance wants to vote off Terry, but I want to change things up and get rid of someone else.

Yul: Who?

Parvati: I want to get rid of Tom.

Yul (to Harriet): Any chance we can get out Parvati?

Cirie: We need Harriet out. She's trouble.

Parvati: I want Yul gone. He's dangerous, and he's really not that useful in challenges.

Jeff (voice-over): And four people received votes.

The camera shows votes for Danni, Harriet, Parvati, and Yul.

Jeff (voice-over): However, the tribe blindsided Yul.

Jeff: Yul, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Yul's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): After the vote, there was confusion about Yul being eliminated with only four votes.

Cirie (to Charlie and Danni): So who did you guys vote for?

Danni: I voted Yul, just like the plan was.

Cirie: I wasn't told. I voted Harriet.

(confessional) Cirie: Yul managed to be voted off last night with just four votes. Clearly the alliance didn't do its job.

Jeff (voice-over): At Ta’aroa, Ozzy and Paula applauded Maria’s new work ethic.

Ozzy: You're doing incredible. And here I was thinking you were just here for the experience and didn't care if you did any work or laid around on the beach all day.

Paula: Naked, I might add.

(confessional) Maria: I came here again because a lot of people thought I won in a total fluke. I'm here to prove them wrong and show that Maria Savovic is not a lazy, naked bimbo.

Jeff (voice-over): At the reward challenge, Charlie and Ozzy were called out as the tribe’s leaders, and they were taken away from their tribes.

Jeff: So Charlie and Ozzy are pretty much the leaders out here? Anyone think otherwise?

The tribes are noticeably silent.

Jeff: Charlie and Ozzy, you need to come with me this way.

Jeff (voice-over): In the challenge, Fati took an early lead.

The camera shows Tom and Danni overpowering Ian and Danielle.

Jeff (voice-over): But Ta’aroa stormed back and won.

Tom tries to hold the boulder back; however, Rafe charges it past the goal line.

Jeff: Ta'aroa wins reward!

Jeff (voice-over): Away from the challenge, Charlie and Ozzy had to swap tribe members.

Charlie (from the board): Today, each of you will be the tribe's captain. You will send four members of your own tribes to the opposing tribes.

Ozzy: Wait, so I have to give up tribe members?

(confessional) Charlie: On one hand, I have to protect my alliance. On the other hand, I have to do what's the fairest thing for both tribes, or Ozzy won't agree to it.

Jeff (voice-over): And they revealed their decisions with both tribes gathered at the neutral camp.

Charlie: Tom, get over here. Cirie and Danni, you too.

Ozzy: Yau-Man, Ian, and Paula, you're all still on my tribe.

Charlie: Maria, Danielle, Rafe, and Jonathan, you're all on my tribe now.

Ozzy: Harriet, Parvati, Twila, and Terry, you're all coming with me.

Jeff (voice-over): The old Ta’aroa were allowed to try for the individual immunity, and Yau-Man got it.

Yau-Man opens the safe. Inside is an immunity idol, which looks like one of the turtle idols from Fiji.

Yau-Man: It's a turtle! And it comes with instructions!

Yau-Man unrolls the instructions.

Yau-Man: You are under no obligation to display this until tonight's vote. Your tribe will go to Tribal Council first, and afterwards, you will assign this to a member of the opposing tribe.

Jeff (voice-over): Without a chance at individual immunity, Parvati caught Maria finding the immunity idol and begged her for it.

Parvati: I want that immunity combination. I want you to find it for me.

Maria: What am I, your bitch? Get the hell out of here.

Parvati: Fine. I'll just have to give away your secret.

Jeff (voice-over): No one wanted to help Parvati stay.

Parvati: So wait a second. It's like this - if you stick with me and help me keep around, I'll watch your back.

Harriet: I think there's only a few things you're any good at watching around here.

Parvati: Oh, come on. I'm done flirting.

Harriet: And I'm done with you.

Jeff (voice-over): Parvati’s fears came true when she was voted out unanimously by her new tribe.

Jeff: Parvati, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Parvati's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): When Fati came in for Tribal Council, it was clear that the tribe was divided down the middle, and the votes reflected that.

Jeff: We have a tie. Four votes each for Danielle and Cirie. I know there's at least one idol in here. We'll see who it's for. If it's Danielle or Cirie, they are safe.

Jeff (voice-over): However, Yau-Man didn’t give immunity to either of them, and a tiebreak was necessary.

Jeff: Yau-Man gave immunity to Rafe. That means we're still tied. Here's how it will work. We have used a few different tiebreaks in seasons past; in fact, I can count five, including one in the Amazon that we never got to use. There is also an experimental tiebreak in here. You will select your tiebreaking method at random from here. One of you will do the honors.

Jeff (voice-over): Faced with the same tiebreak that they went through in Exile Island, Danielle tried to beat Cirie again, but she failed and was out of the game.

Jeff: Danielle, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Danielle's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): Back at Fati, Maria tried to cut a deal with her new tribemates.

Maria: I know you're close to Charlie, so here's the plan. You, me, Charlie, Jonathan, and Rafe.

Danni: You're counting on two of us to flip over?

Maria: For good. I want this alliance past the merge as well.

Jeff (voice-over): And Ta’aroa was shocked to discover that their tarps were missing.

Ian: Don't tell me we don't have anything.

Ozzy: I can only hope the other tribe's in the same situation we are.

Jeff (voice-over): At the reward challenge, both tribes learned what happened to their reward items.

Jeff: Well, a few of you probably noticed that all your reward items are missing from camp. Well...

Jeff uncovers a basket; all the rewards are there.

Jeff: ...they're here, and the winning tribe gets everything.

Jeff (voice-over): The tribes played a strategy game to determine the winner, and Harriet made a careless mistake.

Jeff: Harriet, you're out of bullets. You can't use a gun; you're out.

Harriet: Son of a bitch. I did this last time, too.

Jeff (voice-over): And Harriet’s absent-minded mistake helped Fati win again.

The camera shows Tom placing a gun on the table while Yau-Man lays out a bullet.

Jeff: That sinks Yau-Man; Fati wins reward!

Jeff (voice-over): Back at Fati, Rafe tried to work on Danni.

Rafe: Really, we think you're on the outs with your alliance. Tom's a provider and so is Charlie. We want you to come over with us.

Danni: Uh-huh. That makes sense. You guys already have a winner, so I wouldn't be left out.

Rafe: Exactly. Besides, we've been allied since the first time we were out here.

Danni: I suppose I owe you one.

Jeff (voice-over): And Danni pretended to buy it, but she wasn’t interested.

(confessional) Danni: I don't owe Rafe jack-s---. I was sitting there like I bought his story, but I have an alliance. I don't need Rafe's alliance. He has nothing I want.

Jeff (voice-over): However, Charlie tried to ensure Maria’s loyalty with a fishing lesson.

(confessional) Maria: My fishing lesson seemed to last all evening; it was dark before I came back.

Jeff (voice-over): But later, they played a trick on her and hid her clothes when she went for a skinny dip.

Charlie: Well, fancy having you back. How's the water?

Maria: It's fine; I enjoyed it. I better have, because it looks like the rest of my time out here will be like this.

Charlie: Like what?

Maria: The tide took all my clothes. I'm naked, and I'm stuck like this.

Jeff (voice-over): And she wasn’t amused when she found out Charlie and Danni played a joke on her.

Maria: Oh, come on; that wasn't very nice.

Charlie: Come on; you had it coming.

(confessional) Maria: Yes, I had it coming. No, I didn't have to like it.

Jeff (voice-over): At the immunity challenge, players had a chance to get physical, but Ian broke the rules.

Jeff: No kicking, Ian!

Ian ignores Jeff's warning and continues to kick Tom's blocker.

Jeff: Ian's disqualified! Tom scores! I said no kicking!

Jeff (voice-over): And in the end, Rafe pulled an upset of Terry and won the challenge for his tribe.

Rafe uses his blocker to pop Terry in the stomach, forcing him back. Rafe then uses the blocker to hit Terry in the face, and Terry soon falls in.

Jeff: Terry's down! Fati wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): At the neutral camp, Paula was targeted for being weak, and she was voted out of the tribe.

Jeff: ...the seventh person voted out of Survivor: All-Stars II...Paula. I will now check the side pouch for an idol.

Jeff (voice-over): However, Paula played the idol, and Ian was eliminated in a tiebreaker challenge.

Jeff: Ian, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Ian's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): In the aftermath of the idol bounce, Paula and Yau-Man needed to recruit an alliance member, and Harriet was skeptical but receptive.

Yau-Man (to Harriet): You, me, and Paula to the end.

Harriet: Won't I lose to you?

Jeff (voice-over): And Fati reveled in being a joyous tribe.

(confessional) Danni: We're the happiest tribe I've ever seen. Neither tribe I was on in Guatemala was anywhere near this happy. Maybe it's that we're winning.

Jeff (voice-over): But the joy was short-lived as Fati couldn’t shoot at the reward challenge.

The camera shows missed shots by Cirie, Danni, and Charlie.

Jeff (voice-over): While Paula led Ta’aroa to an easy victory.

Jeff: Paula scores! Ta'aroa wins reward!

Jeff (voice-over): At Fati, Charlie was enjoying a budding relationship with Danni.

Danni: Even out in Guatemala, all I wanted was one person I could trust completely.

Charlie: You sure we should be so open about this?

Danni kisses Charlie on the neck and wraps her arm around him.

Danni: Relax, big guy; we have people begging to be in an alliance with us. We're on top of the world.

(confessional) Charlie: I could be voted out at the next Council, and I would still be on top of the world.

Jeff (voice-over): And others noticed how close they were getting.

Tom: Well, good morning, lovebirds.

Danni: Hey, just trying to stay warm here.

Tom: Was the kiss on the neck just trying to stay warm, too?

Jeff (voice-over): At the immunity challenge, the tribes battled in a bamboo maze, and the underdog Ta’aroa pulled off another victory.

Ozzy starts pointing to everyone and issuing commands; soon, the star spins, and the tribe escapes the maze while Fati is still stuck. With Ozzy walking backward, Ta'aroa crosses the finish line.

Jeff: Ta'aroa wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): At the neutral camp, Danni and Charlie disagreed on what to tell Maria about the vote.

Danni: It's Rafe.

Charlie: OK. I'll tell Maria--

Danni: No, don't.

Charlie: If she's not told, she won't trust us.

Danni: If she is told, she might pass the idol and then we're split three-three.

Charlie: I'm in charge of making sure she doesn't flip, though.

Jeff (voice-over): Charlie told Maria.

Charlie: So the plan is we vote Rafe.

Maria: Rafe? What?

Charlie: It's simple. You, me, and Danni go to the final three together.

(confessional) Maria: Charlie's had a lot of time to plan this.

Jeff (voice-over): But Maria voted for Danni anyway.

Jeff: ...Three votes Danni. Two votes Rafe.

Jeff (voice-over): However, the Fati alliance was in control, and Maria didn’t play her idol, so Rafe was sent packing.

Jeff: Rafe, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Rafe's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): Maria later explained that she threw her vote away, and her explanation satisfied Charlie.

Charlie: Why not vote with us?

Maria: I wanted to keep up the illusion that I am with them.

(confessional) Maria: I threw away my vote, but the way it worked out, I can tell Jonathan that I am with him, and maybe he won't flip over to the other tribe at the merge.

Jeff (voice-over): But it didn’t satisfy Danni.

Charlie (to Danni): Maria threw her vote away.

Danni: She voted for me; how can you even think that?

Charlie: I talked to her. She's with us.

Danni: She's given no indication that she's with us. I don't trust Maria one bit.

Jeff (voice-over): At Ta’aroa, Terry tried to scale a fish, but he couldn’t figure it out. Despite this, he continued, and Paula wasn’t happy.

Terry is shown carving chunks of fish out with the scales, leaving the fish Ozzy caught looking disheveled and with little meat.

Paula: OK Terry, you can cut it out now. You're not doing it right at all.

Terry: What the hell are you talking about? I'm doing just fine, and I don't need you distracting me!

Jeff (voice-over): The reward challenge was head-to-head, and Charlie and Terry volunteered to go first.

Jeff: Is there anyone that any of you want a shot at?

Terry: I know exactly who I want a shot at, and I think it's who everyone here wants a shot at.

Charlie: Well, take your shot.

Terry: I'll wipe that sarcastic tone right out of your mouth, Forrest.

Charlie: I'd like to see you try, Deitz. Of course, I'd like to see you face-down crying to your mama, too.

Jeff: I'm guessing we have our first match of the challenge, then.

Charlie: Oh hell, sure.

Terry: You're going down, Forrest.

Jeff (voice-over): Charlie won the first match.

The camera shows Charlie rolling the log faster than Terry could run.

Jeff: Charlie scores! Fati up one-nothing!

Jeff (voice-over): But Terry won the rematch.

Charlie begins moving the log back and forth steadily, but Terry charges the log in the same direction Tom had tried. Charlie loses his footing, and he goes in the water.

Jeff: Terry scores! Ta'aroa on top four-three!

Jeff (voice-over): With Charlie and Terry splitting, their matches, it fell on Danni to win it for Fati, and win she did.

Paula walks onto the log, slips, and loses her balance. She straddles the log.

Danni: OK Paula, we can do this the easy way or the hard way.

Paula leaps up and gets on her hands and feet on the log.

Paula: I pick the hard way, young lady.

Danni: OK then.

Danni spins Paula off the log before she can get her grip back.

Jeff: Danni scores! Fati wins reward!

Jeff (voice-over): At the reward, Charlie and Danni got even closer.

Danni wraps her arm around Charlie's neck and lays her head on his shoulder.

Danni (to Charlie): I'm having an amazing time.

Charlie: Me too.

The screen shows them kissing as it pans back to show a seemingly befuddled Maria looking on at them.

(confessional) Maria: All I can say is thank goodness Charlie kept his clothes on.

Jeff (voice-over): While Jonathan wasn’t happy to be there.

The camera shows Jonathan sitting on the ground ignoring the movie.

(confessional) Cirie: Jonathan seemed more concerned that the projector was about to explode or something than about enjoying himself.

Jeff (voice-over): And his bizarre behavior kept up the next day.

Tom (shouting to Jonathan): Hey, come have some of the snacks with us! We saved some for you!

Jonathan doesn't give an obvious response and continues to knock down coconuts with limited success.

(confessional) Cirie: Jonathan's showing some of the strangest behavior I've ever seen. It's like there's five of us here enjoying ourselves, winning as a tribe, and making the most of it out here, and then there's Jonathan, who can't seem to have fun at all.

Jeff (voice-over): At Ta’aroa, Harriet got hurt.

Harriet places a coconut on a surface and winds up to chop it; she misses and hits herself in the knee with the machete instead.

Harriet cries out in obvious pain and clutches her knee.

Twila: Son of a bitch, Harriet! Are you OK?

Harriet: Just get me something to stop the bleeding already!

Jeff (voice-over): And Medical advised her not to get her knee wet.

Chase: OK, Harriet, first I'm going to put pressure on your knee, and then I should be able to slow the bleeding down enough for stitches.

Harriet: Can I stay in the game?

Chase: I think so, but I don't want you getting this bandage wet.

Harriet: The tribes are even, Doc. What if the next challenge is in the water?

Chase: If there's any way to stay on land, do it.

Jeff (voice-over): Unfortunately, the immunity challenge was water-based.

Jeff: This challenge does involve diving.

Jeff (voice-over): Harriet stayed dry, and Fati took a big lead.

The camera shows Fati at the shore while Ta’aroa is still struggling to row.

Jeff (voice-over): However, Fati used their best rowers early on, and Ta’aroa caught up, giving Yau-Man a chance to earn another climactic victory for Ta’aroa.

Jeff: We're neck and neck! It might come down to who has the faster torch-bearer!

The tribes arrive at the platforms at almost the same time; Twila hands the torch to Yau-Man, who runs up without stumbling. Charlie takes the torch himself and begins to gain on Yau-Man.

Both flag bearers quietly put the flags in the holders; Yau-Man, in an effort to dodge Paula, leaps over her and appears to soar at the wok. Charlie is still on the ground but just out of reach of the wok as Yau-Man flies toward it.

He reaches his hand out and drops the torch in the general area of the wok.

It falls in, and the wok is set ablaze.

Jeff: Ta'aroa wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): As a bonus, Ta’aroa got to steal a member of Fati.

Yau-Man: We're taking Maria back with us.

Jeff (voice-over): At the neutral camp, Jonathan was the only old Ta’aroa on Fati, and he was sure his only chance was finding the idol.

Jonathan (from the clue): If you want the idol, you will have to start over soon. What the hell does that mean?

(confessional) Jonathan: I can't figure out what the hell the latest idol clue means, and the other alliance is voting me out here. I really don't know what else I can do.

Jeff (voice-over): Jonathan talked to Tom and tried to get Danni gone.

Jonathan (to Tom): Look, we need to split up Charlie and Danni sooner or later.

Jeff (voice-over): But he spoke in error.

Jonathan: Charlie will get over losing Danni, and frankly, we need to break them up somehow.

Tom: Yeah, but what if Charlie runs over to the other tribe and joins them? I can see that just to get back at us.

Jonathan: He'll still understand that we need to get rid of the previous winners.

(confessional) Jonathan: Oops. That was not the best thing to say around Tom.

Jeff (voice-over): And the tribe voted Jonathan out, making him the first member of the jury.

Jeff: Jonathan, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Jonathan's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): Back at camp, Danni panicked.

(confessional) Danni: I've come to the realization that our entire strategy is dependent on Maria. If she's not with us, we're in big trouble come the merge.

Jeff (voice-over): But she showed that she didn’t have a reason to panic.

Danni: I didn't want him to waste his breath by telling us he was playing the idol.

Danni takes a turtle-like object out of her pocket; this object is clearly a hidden immunity idol.

Danni: Because I found it.

Jeff (voice-over): At Ta’aroa, Paula recruited a receptive Maria.

Paula (to Maria): You, me, and our alliance to the final six.

Maria: I could do that. Who all do you have as our alliance?

Paula: Ozzy, Yau-Man, and Twila are definitely in.

Jeff (voice-over): At the reward challenge, the tribes had to secure their lockboxes in order to keep the other tribe from retrieving their flag.

The camera shows two structures surrounding the lockboxes; the one Fati built is slightly more impressive.

Jeff (voice-over): Yau-Man tried to light Ta’aroa’s structure on fire.

Jeff: Yau-Man! What the hell are you doing?

Yau-Man: They're not getting into the structure if it's on fire!

Jeff (voice-over): And Maria helped by burning her tank top and shorts.

Jeff: Maria doing the Full Monty!

Charlie: Hey Maria, light your bikini on fire!

Maria: You wish, tough guy.

Jeff (voice-over): Ta’aroa cruised to an easy win with Maria and Yau-Man’s ingenuity.

The camera pans back to see Charlie and Tom trying to get through the maze of knots while Terry tosses the flag over to Maria, who runs over to raise it. She spends a few quick seconds hooking it in and sends it up the flagpole.

Jeff: Ta'aroa wins reward!

Jeff (voice-over): Before the reward, Maria had a big decision to make.

Jeff: You have the option of allowing Fati to grab a quick plate and enjoy a few minutes with the Ta'aroa tribe. If you take this, you're going straight back to camp. Or you could stay and enjoy the feast.

Jeff (voice-over): Maria stuck with Ta’aroa, and as a result, she joined their tribe.

Jeff: You decided to stay here with Ta'aroa, and so you shall. You are now a member of Ta'aroa. Enjoy.

(confessional) Harriet: Well, we have another member, which is nice, but if we lose, it does me no good, since Maria's kind of with the big shots around here.

Jeff (voice-over): Back with her old tribe, Maria got comfortable.

Paula: So I have to ask, Maria. Why burn your clothes?

Maria: I wanted to win. I wanted to make sure we could win.

Paula: But the bikini stayed.

Maria: Oh, if you insist...

Maria undoes her bikini top and then slides down her bottom. All of Ta'aroa, even the reserved Terry, cheers.

(confessional) Paula: It just isn't Survivor if Maria doesn't get naked.

Jeff (voice-over): However, Maria going to Ta’aroa necessitated someone going to Fati, and by random selection, Maria chose Terry.

Jeff: What would you say if I sent you back to Fati right now?

Maria: I would probably cry.

Jeff: I won't be sending anyone to Fati.

The tribe cheers loudly.

Jeff: However, Maria, you will.

The camera shows Terry getting on a boat.

Jeff (voice-over): After a nice reward, Ta’aroa took it easy.

Yau-Man (to Paula): So we have the five, right?

Paula: To hell with it. Worry about it tomorrow.

Yau-Man: Well, what about Terry on the other tribe?

Paula: He's on the other tribe, Yau. Now shut up and get busy relaxing.

Jeff (voice-over): While Fati worked hard.

Terry (to Tom): Right now, the other tribe's probably trying to order margaritas and nachos. They're probably coming into the next challenge with their heads in the clouds, and we're coming at them like a ton of bricks.

Jeff (voice-over): And the hard-working Fati tribe cruised to a victory in the immunity challenge.

The camera shows a Fati ball dropping into the end of the maze.

Jeff: Fati wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): At the neutral camp, Harriet tried to cut a deal with Paula.

Paula: Maria's a danger, and I have no problem blindsiding her.

Harriet: I'll talk to the others.

(confessional) Harriet: If getting Maria out saves my skin, I'll do it.

Jeff (voice-over): However, despite Paula’s support, Harriet was next to go.

Jeff: Harriet, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Harriet's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): The next day, the tribes met at the neutral camp and learned that they were merging.

Jeff: Congratulations, everyone; you made the merge.

Both tribes discard their old buffs, dropping them at Jeff's feet; they replace the old buffs with new, bold red ones. The buffs are a slightly metallic replica of Xhakum red.

Jeff (voice-over): Danni and Maria were forced to turn in their immunity idols, but they got extra money for the auction for their troubles.

Jeff: Anyone who has one needs to come up here and hand it to me right now.

(confessional) Danni: It's a little like having your car stolen and getting a check from your insurance company for enough money to buy a scooter.

Jeff (voice-over): The Survivors bought their merge feast.

The camera shows Maria’s purchase of pineapple as well as Terry’s purchase of a hamburger.

Jeff (voice-over): With an ice cream sundae for two up for bids, Danni and Maria broke out their best tricks to win.

Danni: A thousand sixty between me and Maria.

Charlie begins conferring with Yau-Man. Yau-Man begins to raise a hand to make a bid.

Danni: And we'll both strip naked.

Charlie: I withdraw my bid.

Jeff (voice-over): When the girls’ naughty behavior was too much for Terry, he left the auction.

Terry: I can't deal with this anymore.

Terry gets up, tosses his money on the table, and sets down his hamburger, which is almost all the way eaten, and his empty Pepsi and walks away.

Jeff: OK, we're down to seven in the auction.

Jeff (voice-over): Tom bought a letter from home and gave one to Cirie, his number one ally.

The camera shows Tom and Cirie reading their letters.

Jeff (voice-over): Ozzy bought an advantage for a future immunity challenge.

Jeff: Sold to Ozzy for eight hundred.

Twila: Wait, what was that?

Jeff: An advantage to any future immunity challenge.

Twila: Damn, I could have used that.

Ozzy: You could have outbid me, too.

Jeff (voice-over): After the auction, Yau-Man suggested Maui for the new tribe’s name, and it stuck.

Charlie: You guys think of a name yet?

Yau-Man: I thought of Maui.

Charlie: You mean like the Hawaiian island?

Yau-Man: Maui invented cooking.

(confessional) Charlie: And here comes Yau-Man talking about some guy named after a Hawaiian island that invented cooking. What did we do before this island guy, anyway, eat everything raw?

Jeff (voice-over): Ozzy led the merge festivities.

Ozzy: Hey, at least we have a tribe name. Now we can all do what we came here to do.

Charlie: Listen, Oz, it's the day of the merge. I'm not working today.

Ozzy: What work? I meant sitting around and playing drinking games.

(confessional) Charlie: And then Ozzy started speaking my language again. I might be 44, but I do enjoy a good drink.

Jeff (voice-over): At the same time, Paula tried to work with Terry.

The camera shows Paula assisting Terry with the new shelter.

Jeff (voice-over): At the immunity challenge, Ozzy declined to use his immunity advantage, but he didn’t appear to need it.

Jeff: If you step down within the next minute, it's yours. If not, the other eight get it.

Charlie: You can't tempt me, Jeff.

Ozzy: I hope they enjoy it.

Jeff: From here on out, there are no more temptations. It's just Charlie against Ozzy, winner takes immunity.

Jeff (voice-over): In the end, after almost four hours, Charlie outlasted Ozzy.

Ozzy's arm jerks suddenly, and his barrel tips over onto him.

Jeff: After all that, Charlie wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): Despite being immune, Charlie knew his alliance was in trouble.

Charlie (to Terry): So Ozzy goes?

Terry: I guess we don't really have a choice.

Charlie: He's the most threatening person on Ta'aroa.

Jeff (voice-over): But it didn’t work, as Terry switched sides and Tom went to the jury.

Jeff: Tom, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Tom's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): After the vote, Cirie and Charlie were sure they were about to be picked off.

Charlie: Now we're screwed. We need two people to flip over, or we need a miracle.

Cirie: Try Terry.

Charlie: And then what? Does my shoe suddenly get a vote?

Jeff (voice-over): Danni weaseled her way into an agreement with Ozzy and Paula.

Danni: Final three.

Paula: Is that it?

(confessional) Danni: The plan for me and Paula was to arrange it so Charlie and Ozzy went to the final four with us, and then we figure one of them probably wins immunity.

Jeff (voice-over): At the reward challenge, the tribe learned that their reward meal was based on their finish in the challenge.

Jeff: Everyone will have one chance to toss a spear close to a target. The one whose spear point lands closest to the center wins reward. It's pretty simple. Let me show you what you're playing for.

Jeff takes the cover off a small table; inside is a small coconut husk filled partially with uncooked rice.

Jeff: This is uncooked rice. It will be cooked for dinner tonight.

The tribe is standing and looking at Jeff in bewilderment.

Jeff: Naturally, the winner won't be eating this. This goes to whichever player's throw lands the farthest from the target. The higher your finish is, the better your meal will be.

Jeff (voice-over): Maria’s toss won her the reward and the right to have one person join her, and Charlie quickly asked not to be that person.

Charlie: Pick someone else besides me to eat with you.

Maria: Wait, what?

Charlie: No, really. Just don't go telling people I asked you not to pick me.

(confessional) Maria: I really hadn't planned on picking Charlie, and I didn't plan on telling everyone he asked me not to. I just thought his request was a little odd.

Jeff (voice-over): Maria chose Paula to eat with her, and Twila was the one stuck eating rice.

(confessional) Twila: Sitting at the end of the table in an uncomfortable chair eating rice and drinking camp water while Maria and Paula had steak and lobster was a little hard to take. Really, if it wasn't such a dumb move, I'd toss the both of them aside.

Jeff (voice-over): And Maria’s drunken behavior after the challenge was a shock for some.

(confessional) Paula: Maria was just pitiful after the reward. Here she was talking about making a roof out of coconuts. I think she actually called Cirie 'John' and asked Charlie for his clothes.

Jeff (voice-over): And the next day, Paula confronted her about it.

Maria: You're overreacting, Paula; I just had a few.

Paula: You can't even remember who you had dinner with! I'm really worried about you.

Maria: I'm a grown woman, Paula.

Paula: And sometimes you have the mindset of a teenager.

Jeff (voice-over): Maria apologized for her behavior, but her tribemates ignored it.

Maria (to the tribe): Listen, everyone, I'm sorry about the way I acted last night. I was over the top, and I probably made you a bit uncomfortable. I don't want this to drive a wedge between us.

(confessional) Terry: She said she was sorry. That's fine. I still want her gone.

Jeff (voice-over): Terry got his wish at the immunity challenge, when a rotted beam collapsed, and Maria was taken from the game with a broken leg.

The camera shows Maria carrying puzzle pieces; she falls, crashes through the beam, and lands very awkwardly on her right leg.

Jeff: Maria, are you all right?

Maria (shouting in obvious pain): Do I look like I'm all right?

Jeff: We need medical!

Jeff (voice-over): Upon learning that Maria was out of the game, Charlie was extremely upset.

Charlie: This challenge is too damn dangerous. I want the name of the man who approved it.

Jeff: We ran it in the Cook Islands without incident.

Charlie: I don't give a damn! All it takes is one assh--- to f--- up the design, and we have this!

Jeff: Charlie, I realize you're upset. I know Maria was a friend of yours--

Charlie: Maria's not just a friend of mine, damnit. She was my ally every step of the way out in Japan, and she's a hell of a competitor. For her to lose like this is completely bulls---.

Jeff: Look, I know how you feel--

Charlie: You know jacks--- about how I feel! I lost the same damn way in Japan, and now I know she's out because the people that make these challenges can't be bothered to take f---ing care of the f---ing set! What the hell did they do, put a hollow beam up there? That's f---ing ridiculous! She doesn't weigh that damn much!

Jeff: Please, Charlie, try to calm down.

Charlie (shouting): Don't f---ing tell me to calm down, assh---. I want the name of the guy that made this set, and I want him over here so I can beat the s--- out of--

Paula: Charlie, calm down!

Charlie: Damnit, this has to be done.

Jeff (voice-over): In light of Maria’s evacuation from the game, the tribe worked hard to take their minds off what happened.

(confessional) Danni: After the disaster at the immunity challenge, no one's in the mood to do anything fun, so we're all working.

Jeff (voice-over): However, Terry was enjoying having one fewer competitor.

Cirie (to Paula): Get a load of Deitz over there.

Paula: Tell me about it. I want to kill him.

Cirie: Maria just broke her leg, and all he can think about is stuffing his face.

(confessional) Terry: Everyone's so upset that no one even felt like eating. Frankly, I couldn't be happier that Maria's gone. It's one fewer person I have to beat, and she was annoying anyway.

Jeff (voice-over): At the reward challenge, Terry’s strength powered him and Yau-Man to a victory.

Jeff: Yau-Man and Terry win reward!

Jeff (voice-over): At the reward, Terry’s selfish attitude angered Yau-Man.

Yau-Man: Hey, what do you say to sneaking some of this back to Paula and Twila?

Terry: Let the poor bastards starve; it's an easy win for us.

Yau-Man: Do you even know what the next challenge is? What if it's something where a full stomach is bad?

Terry: Screw it. Who cares?

(confessional) Yau-Man: At this point, I don't even think Terry's own mother would vote him a million dollars. I wouldn't vote him ten cents.

Jeff (voice-over): And his arrogance angered Cirie, his first opponent in the immunity challenge.

Jeff: First up, we have Cirie against Terry.

Terry: Pfft, too easy.

Jeff (voice-over): And Cirie had a few harsh words when she defeated Terry.

Cirie (to Terry): Too easy, assh---.

Jeff (voice-over): Despite Cirie’s desire to win, Ozzy won immunity for the first time.

Jeff: Danni in the water! Ozzy wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): At camp, Charlie was a target until he announced that he found the idol.

Twila: Charlie found the idol.

Ozzy: No way.

Twila: We need to vote for Danni.

Ozzy: Fine with me.

(confessional) Twila: Charlie's a little too loud, and he's about to get a shock when his girlfriend's name comes up five times at Tribal tonight.

Jeff (voice-over): And Danni’s name came up four times at Tribal Council, enough to vote her out.

Jeff: ...the twelfth person voted out of Survivor: All-Stars II and the fourth member of the jury...Danni.

Jeff (voice-over): However, Danni and Charlie tricked Twila, and she played an idol she already found on herself, and Twila was voted out instead.

Jeff: Twila, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Twila's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): At the ensuing reward, the reward was big.

Jeff: The 2008 Cadillac Escalade goes to whoever wins this challenge. In addition, if you win the car, you win lunch. I'll tell you what's on the menu after the challenge. Trust me, you'll like it.

(confessional) Cirie: A big SUV and lunch at once? They're breaking out an All-Star reward; that's for sure.

Jeff (voice-over): Yau-Man was the last Survivor standing, and he won the car; however, he tried to give it away.

Yau-Man: I will give you this car, but in exchange, if we are both still around at the final four and you win immunity, I want you to give me the necklace.

Jeff: You understand what happened the last time you tried something like that, right, Yau-Man?

Jeff (voice-over): Charlie didn’t bite, however.

Charlie: How much is the car worth?

Jeff: Total, with all accessories?

Charlie: Yeah, total.

Jeff: We're looking at seventy-one thousand dollars.

Charlie: And the taxes are paid for?

Jeff: And the taxes are paid for.

The camera focuses in on Charlie contemplating the deal.

Yau-Man is shown with a smile on his face and his hands clenched in anticipation.

Charlie: No deal.

Jeff (voice-over): And Charlie and Paula decided that Yau-Man had to go.

Paula (to Charlie): Yau-Man's tough.

Charlie: Tell me about it.

Paula: I think we need to go all-out and win immunity.

(confessional) Charlie: It got to the point where we decided it was time to say goodbye to Yau-Man. What's to say he doesn't try to make someone else sell their soul to him the way he wanted me to?

Jeff (voice-over): At the immunity challenge, Charlie held up his end of the bargain, and Yau-Man didn’t win immunity.

Jeff: Yau-Man overshoots it. Charlie wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): At camp, Ozzy wanted to target Danni, but Terry had a vendetta.

Ozzy (to Terry): Danni's next.

Terry: Danni? What about Cirie?

Ozzy: Cirie hasn't found two idols.

Terry: Cirie would also beat any of us except Yau-Man in the final vote.

(confessional) Terry: I have a score to settle with Cirie. Or, more accurately, she has a score to settle with me, and I don't want her to have the chance.

Jeff (voice-over): Charlie and Danni banked on Terry to vote out Yau-Man.

Danni (to Cirie): Can we get four to cut Yau-Man?

Cirie: Terry might do it.

(confessional) Cirie: We need a fourth vote. Yau-Man's our target, Ozzy won't flip, and Paula's close to Yau-Man. Our only hope is Terry.

Jeff (voice-over): And it worked; Terry was the fourth vote to send Yau-Man packing.

Jeff: Yau-Man, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Yau-Man's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): The next day, Ozzy feared for his life in the game.

Paula (to Ozzy): Hey, how's breakfast coming?

Ozzy: It's coming along like it's my only hope.

Jeff (voice-over): And Paula defended herself against charges of voting against Terry.

Paula: Look, Terry's a major problem around here.

Ozzy: I know he is, but when you know how we're voting, and you have two real opportunities to get Danni out, you waste both.

(confessional) Paula: Come on now. It's in my best interests to keep Danni around, just like it is for me to keep Terry around. They might win a challenge, but they're no threat to me.

Jeff (voice-over): At the reward challenge, the Survivors got to compete for time with their loved ones.

The camera shows Charlie’s son Derek, Cirie’s husband H.B., Danni’s brother Drew, Ozzy’s mother Gina, and Terry’s wife Trish emerging from behind the trees.

Jeff (voice-over): Paula learned that her sister and only requested visitor was in the hospital and couldn’t come.

Jeff (sighing first): Lynn is in the hospital. She was in a car accident. She's in stable condition, but she injured her left arm and couldn't be out here.

Jeff (voice-over): And she was shocked by a visit from her step-dad, with whom she was not on speaking terms.

Derek: Paula hasn't spoken to her step-dad since just after her mom died. They had a pretty big fight, and they just decided they weren't going to see each other anymore.

Jeff: Wait, Derek, are you telling the truth?

Paula (still sobbing): He's telling the truth, Jeff.

Jeff (voice-over): Jim, Paula’s step-dad, explained the situation.

Jim: There was a large sum of cash that Paula's mother had left to her family when she died. I wanted a third, and Paula and her sister could each have a third. Paula said she deserved more because she had four kids to raise. We never found a figure we were both happy with, and ultimately, she never took any of the money. After some name-calling and object-throwing, we decided it was best if we didn't talk for a while.

Jeff (voice-over): Paula forgave Jim, though, and agreed to let him stay.

Jeff: At this point, there are only two things we can do. The two of you can compete with everyone else, and if you win, you have plenty of time to talk about it, or we can send Jim home now, you can sit out of the challenge, and what you do after that is in your hands.

Paula: Oh, what the hell.

Jeff (voice-over): Despite Paula’s desire to compete, it was Charlie who won the family visit.

The camera shows Derek in front of a lighting torch.

Jeff: Charlie and Derek win reward!

Jeff (voice-over): Charlie chose to give Danni a visit from her brother, and Derek gave Paula a chance to talk to Jim.

The camera shows Derek, Drew, and Jim leaving with the Survivors.

Jeff (voice-over): When Jim got to camp, he and Paula picked up where they left off.

Ozzy: So wait, Jim, how long have you been in Paula's life?

Jim: Paula was 10 when I married her mother, and I was 41. I don't think she ever got used to having a step-dad who was eight years older than her mom was.

Paula: Oh sure, that's what I told you just to scare the hell out of you when Mom brought you home.

Jeff (voice-over): Charlie and Derek enjoyed dinner and pool at an island house.

Charlie: That ball's going right in here.

Derek: I bet it is.

Charlie aims in such a way that the ball bounces off the rail, crosses the table, bounces off the other rail, and backspins into the pocket that Charlie called.

Derek: Holy hell, Dad. I never had a chance.

Jeff (voice-over): Charlie learned the true value of his win.

(confessional) Charlie: There were four week-long trips and a couple of bonus trips. I got one trip to Japan, one to Brazil, one to Australia, and one to Panama. And they threw in a few added bonuses, like a week-long cruise and a couple of short stays in the south Pacific.

Jeff (voice-over): And Derek revealed how he felt about Danni.

Derek: Lemme tell you something, Dad. That Danni is a fine woman. The fact that you've been out here for a month and haven't made a move on her means either you're a stronger man than I am or--

Charlie: Yeah, yeah, yeah, make fun of your old man for not getting a date in eleven years.

Jeff (voice-over): After his son left, Charlie dropped a bombshell.

(confessional) Charlie: The whole thing between me and Danni is an act. We're both just pretending to be a couple.

Jeff (voice-over): And then he dropped another bombshell.

(confessional) Charlie: The other part of the act is that I was just pretending about my dates with Paula being a failure. We're very much in love.

Jeff (voice-over): At the immunity challenge, four Survivors hung on for life.

The camera shows Charlie, Danni, Ozzy, and Paula on their totem poles hanging on.

Jeff (voice-over): But when Charlie’s bad hand gave out, Ozzy won his second immunity challenge.

Charlie: Damn, my hand--

Charlie releases with his left hand, falls down the pole, and lands on the ground.

Jeff: Charlie gave out; Ozzy wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): At camp, Charlie wanted to target Cirie.

Charlie (to Danni): Cirie or Terry?

Danni: Terry isn't beating anyone.

Charlie: Cirie then?

Danni: Sounds good.

(confessional) Charlie: Since the beginning of the game, I was in an alliance with Cirie, but it comes to that time where she's no longer useful.

Jeff (voice-over): But Paula wanted Terry gone.

Paula (to Ozzy): Hey, you don't want to go against Terry, do you?

Ozzy: I was planning on voting out Charlie, to be honest. Isn't that the logical move? He'll kill all of us in the final vote.

Paula: Charlie won't reach the final vote. We can cut him loose later. Terry's a danger.

Jeff (voice-over): Tribal Council saw Terry taking a lot of heat.

Terry: I know Paula's talking about me; she always says I don't pull my weight around camp.

Paula: You did at first, but you stopped. I can't figure that out.

Terry: I resent that.

Paula: You resent everything. I tried to bond with you earlier, and all you do is act like a total weirdo. It's like it's not even worth it to try to be friends with you.

Danni: Terry can be a very hard person to live with. He thinks he knows everything, and he won't listen to anything other than what he believes he already knows.

Charlie: Damnit, my English bulldog listens better than you do, Deitz. Get your head in the game, let things go, and try to have some fun out here. What's the problem, Deitz? You're not winning? You don't have Aras to poke fun at anymore? What the hell's your deal?

Ozzy: It's as clear as day that Terry's not exactly Mr. Popularity out here.

Jeff: Terry, are you aware of this?

Terry: People say that to me all the time, sure. Terry, you're hard to relate to. Terry, you're lazy. Terry, you're bossy. Terry, I don't like your political views.

Jeff (voice-over): Terry’s unpopularity caught up with him, and he was voted out.

Jeff: Terry, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Terry's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): Back at camp, Charlie, Cirie, Danni, and Paula sealed Ozzy’s fate.

Danni (to Cirie): If Ozzy doesn't win immunity, he's gone.

Cirie: Tell me something I don't know.

Jeff (voice-over): And after wild speculation about the final reward…

Paula: So what could be bigger than the car?

Charlie: I got some vacations, but there's no way those are worth as much as the car.

Danni: Maybe it's a house or something.

Jeff (voice-over): …the players learned that they were competing for the biggest reward ever.

Jeff: It's another 2008 Cadillac Escalade just like Yau-Man's. But this one's different. Instead of keeping this car, you will trade it in after four years and get a new GM car every four years for the rest of your life. It's a lease that lasts as long as you're alive.

Jeff (voice-over): Cirie and Ozzy were out quickly, and Charlie, Danni, and Paula were faced with eating fafaru for the reward.

Paula: I'd rather walk everywhere than eat that.

Jeff (voice-over): And, with a perfect score on the last part of the challenge, Danni won the car lease.

Danni's shot rips down the middle of the silver target.

Jeff: With that shot, Danni wins reward.

Jeff (voice-over): Danni picked Charlie to join her on the reward, a night on a yacht, but she got paranoid and tried to learn where Charlie stood.

Danni (to the waiter): Another Budweiser, please.

Charlie (a little buzzed): Hey, I'm good. No more.

Danni: Oh, come on, Charlie; it's good for you. Just like old times.

Charlie: What old times?

Danni (forcefully): Listen to me. You're going to drink this beer. I went to the trouble of getting it for you.

Charlie: OK, come on already.

(confesional) Danni: I wanted him drunk. I wanted him to spill his game plan. And if he was keeping Cirie over me, he and Paula were history.

Jeff (voice-over): And she tortured him into revealing his hand, and when she didn’t get an answer she liked, she went on the offensive.

Danni: I need to know if I'm in your final three or if Cirie is.

Charlie: What? What kind of stupid question is that?

Danni: Answer me.

Charlie: I don't...damn, my head hurts.

Danni (angrily): I said answer me, damn you!

Charlie: I need to lie down. I don't want to talk about this. I'll tell you about it in the morning.

(confessional) Danni: I didn't like Charlie's answer. It wasn't definitive for me. And frankly, I think Paula's on the beach now plotting to stab me in the back. I'm doing something about this. Mark my words.

Jeff (voice-over): And when Charlie woke up, Danni had a shock for him.

Charlie: Oh God. Tell me we didn't do it. I seriously hope we didn't have sex.

Danni: Well, I was in the bathroom this morning getting ready. The evidence of our activities last night is pretty overwhelming.

Jeff (voice-over): Convinced that he and Danni had sex on the yacht, Charlie avoided Danni and everyone else around camp.

Cirie: Danni's acting really weird, and so is Charlie. They don't need to be in the final three.

Ozzy: Fine by me; it gets me farther in the game. Are you in?

Cirie: Hell yes.

Jeff (voice-over): And Danni told Paula everything.

Danni: Well, OK. Charlie and I had a few too many on the yacht.

Paula: Uh-huh. Go on.

Danni: And when we got back to the room...

There is a look of apparent concern on Paula's face.

Danni: ...we had sex.

(confessional) Paula: Oh, hell no. Hell f---ing no, Danni. If I didn't stand to make a million dollars off this game, I would have punched her teeth out right there.

Jeff (voice-over): With an angry Paula, Charlie knew he had to win immunity, but at the challenge, Ozzy used his immunity advantage.

Jeff: Ozzy, your set of keys is color-coded to match the paint on the locks. Everyone else is not so lucky.

Jeff (voice-over): Ozzy used his advantage to coast to an easy win.

Ozzy reaches for his flag, grabs it, and raises it.

Jeff: Ozzy wins immunity!

Jeff (voice-over): At camp, Charlie put Danni’s story together and discovered she lied to him.

Cirie: That girl is just too damn greedy, trying all this fake couple stuff, getting you wasted, claiming it "just happened" and then washing her hands of you when she's this far in the game.

Charlie: I'd like to wash her mouth out.

Cirie: Me too. Do we still have any soap?

(confessional) Charlie: And for some reason, that one word "soap" just set off my memory. Danni just stuffed a condom full of soap and used it as evidence that we had sex. I should have known. Danni's a liar and a dirty bitch, and I am making it my mission to take her down.

Jeff (voice-over): However, Paula didn’t believe him.

Charlie: Danni's lying.

Paula: Why the hell should I believe you, and why the hell should I give a damn?

Charlie: Look, I admit I got a little drunk, but that was her pushing me to do so, and--

Paula (shouting): You're a grown man, Charlie! Take some responsibility for your actions! Just man up and admit you had sex with her! I'm sick of looking at you and knowing that you lied to me like this!

Jeff (voice-over): And Danni stuck to her guns.

Jeff: Straight up, did you have sex with Charlie on the yacht?

Danni (after a pause): Yes.

Jeff (voice-over): And Charlie became the next person voted out.

Jeff: Charlie, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Charlie's torch.

Jeff (voice-over): Only four remain. One person will win one million dollars and the title of Sole Survivor. Who will it be? Find out tonight.

The camera shows a quick overview of the Gambiers as the Survivor theme begins to play. The first sequence appears to be out of the Japan opening spliced with the Vanuatu opening; a cannon appears in the background, and the music appears to be an amalgamation of the past seven themes with some imagery from each. Player intros are given in alphabetical order by tribe, with Fati going first and Ta'aroa going second. All screen shots of players in this intro are from the first episode, and all are wearing their tribes' buffs. As the intro comes to a close, images of the last seven settings centered around a pirate ship appear to fade as the Survivor: All-Stars II logo is superimposed over the center of the screen. The logo appears similar to the first All-Stars logo except it reads "All-Stars II" and the dominant background color is a bold red instead of blue. The green from the old All-Stars logo is replaced with a dark blue, and the text is silver.

At this point, the screen cuts to commercial.

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 Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 -... Colonel Zoidberg 08-28-07 1
 Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 -... Colonel Zoidberg 08-28-07 2
 Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 -... Colonel Zoidberg 08-28-07 3
 Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 -... Colonel Zoidberg 08-28-07 4
 Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 -... Colonel Zoidberg 08-28-07 5
 Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 -... Colonel Zoidberg 08-28-07 6
 Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 -... Colonel Zoidberg 08-28-07 7
   THIS? jbug 08-31-07 8
       RE: THIS? Colonel Zoidberg 08-31-07 9

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1. "Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 - "This Is a Game for a Million Dollars, Not a Daytime Soap Opera""
The following events took place on Saturday, May 17, 2008 at 10:51 am.

As told by an off-duty undercover reporter who witnessed the entire event from a nearby coffee shop.

It’s morning on Manhattan Island, and I am on a street corner drinking coffee. A man who looks an awful lot like that guy from Survivor is walking quickly toward the clothing store about half a block from here.

However, before he can cross the street, a woman standing about 5’2”, appearing to be in her late 40s to early 50s, and not appearing to have showered or washed her hair recently accosts him.

She has a large duffel bag; the man is unarmed. Upon closer inspection, the man being accosted is Charlie Forrest from the show. I listened closely.

Charlie: Look, I don’t have any money. Go mug someone else.

Assailant: I’m not going anywhere until I get what I want.

Charlie: Look, I don’t have anything you need. I’m going to get some shoes I ordered.

Assailant: You’re not getting anything. You’re coming with me.

Charlie: Look, I don’t have time for this. Just go get cash from some other sap because I don’t have any. And take a shower, for the love of God; you smell worse than my ex-wife—

Assailant: That’s about enough, Charlie Forrest. You’re coming with me.

Charlie: Wait, how the hell do you know who I am?

Assailant: Everyone knows who you are. I was hoping you would recognize me, since you own one of my DVDs.

Charlie: DVDs?

Assailant: Yes, you and Derek are the only ones who have them. I’ll show you a little sample, and then tonight, you can have the whole thing.

The assailant takes off her shirt, which was dirty and torn, and is soon barefoot and in only a bra and panties. Her body is scarred, wrinkled, out of shape, and poorly taken care of. Out of the pants that she removed, she took out a small handgun.

At this point, I looked down at my news article under the “Television News” section. The headline reads “Escaped ‘Survivor’ Stalker Headed North.” I realized from this source that Charlie’s assailant is indeed his ex-wife, Dena Goodman.

In her distraction, Charlie was able to type in a quick message on his cell phone until Dena pointed the gun at him.

Dena: Put the phone down.

Charlie instantly does so. Dena picks it up, still pointing the gun at Charlie.

Dena: I have six bullets in here, and that’s more than enough to take down you and anyone around here.

Charlie: Look, make it quick because I have places I have to be. The finale’s tomorrow. What the hell do you want?

Dena: I want you back.

There are bystanders who stand and gawk at this, but no one appears to do anything; most just ignore the situation and go about their business. Dena’s duffel bag is at her feet and now has her clothes draped over it.

Back from commercial.

Angakauitai Island, Maui camp, Night 36. Ozzy hangs up his immunity necklace and immediately pulls Danni aside; Cirie and a still-shaken Paula go to a separate part of camp.

Ozzy: Look, I know you stood by your story at Council. I just don’t know if I should believe it.

Danni: Why shouldn’t you believe it? I told the truth; what more do you want?

Ozzy: I just want to understand what really happened.

Danni: OK, it’s simple. I’m honestly attracted to the guy, or I was. I wanted to get close to him, and we were both a little wasted. I had no idea at the time it was going to turn into sex, but it did.

Ozzy: Wait, I don’t follow. I thought he came onto you.

(confessional) Danni: Oh no. Ozzy was wise to me, and I hadn’t kept my story straight. The only way out was to keep lying.

Danni: I just said that at Tribal because it took the focus off me. I really came onto him.

Ozzy: I think it’s time the tribe knew what really happened.

Danni: Look, I’ll tell Paula tomorrow when she’s less upset, but for now, I think we need to get some sleep. We have a big challenge tomorrow.

(confessional) Ozzy: I’m glad everyone else buys Danni’s little act. I never bought it from the get-go, but I didn’t say anything because no one was ready to listen and the mob was calling for Charlie’s head anyway. It’s not a position I want to be in.

Angakauitai Island, Maui camp, Day 37. Upon waking up, Danni immediately goes to confront Ozzy.

Danni: Look, I’m waiting for Paula to get up before I tell her everything.

Ozzy: Look, what you tell Paula is your business. At this point, you and Charlie shattered whatever relationship he had with her, and you’re just going to have to live with that. I have other things I have to worry about besides who’s breaking whose heart. This is a game for a million dollars, not a daytime soap opera.

(confessional) Danni: I don’t think Ozzy trusts me, but it won’t matter if one of the girls wins immunity. He’s the next to go, and then people will hopefully realize what a great game move my sex lie was. And then I’ll use this million to get my teeth re-done after Paula rearranges them.

Danni (to Cirie): Do you think we have a chance at immunity?

Cirie: I probably don’t; you might.

Danni: What’s the only season they haven’t done yet?

Cirie: Paula’s season. I can’t remember what challenges they had. I hope it’s nothing like that balance beam challenge from Ozzy’s season.

(confessional) Cirie: Ozzy’s the only person left in the game who’s won an immunity challenge, and he’s up against three women with a combined total of…I think one immunity win.

Cirie: He’s won three immunities, and he won, what, four on his season?

Danni: Five. I’ve won two, and you won that one, right?

Cirie: I didn’t win anything on my season.

(confessional) Cirie: OK, so it’s two wins. That doesn’t mean a damn thing when Ozzy’s the competition.

The camera switches to Mangareva Island, Day 37. Various challenge items appear to be present.

Jeff: Come on in, guys!

The four remaining Survivors, with Danni and Ozzy in the back, take their spots on the red tribal mat.

Jeff: First thing’s first – Ozzy, hand it over.

Ozzy hands Jeff the immunity necklace.

Jeff: Once again, immunity is back up for grabs. Let’s get to today’s challenge. Like all other immunity challenges, this one is taken from a past season. The first challenge of the game was from our first season; it is fitting that this challenge is from our most recent.

The camera focuses on a Survivor: Japan flag; enough detail is shown to see that the “Outwit, Outplay, Outlast” is written in Katakana.

Jeff: This challenge is called “You’re On.” You will face off in a head-to-head match with every other remaining Survivor. Here’s how it works. The two Survivors in a match will draw for one of seven tasks. One Survivor will then bid on their ability to complete the task within a time or accuracy parameter. The other Survivor will either claim to be able to beat that estimate or will reply with, “You’re On.” If the other person says, “You’re On,” you have to complete the task within the parameters you suggested. If you succeed, you get a point; if you fail, your opponent gets a point. Whoever has the most points after everyone plays three times wins immunity and is guaranteed a one-in-three shot at a million dollars. For everyone else, you are vulnerable at Tribal Council, and you cannot be saved by an idol. We’ll draw for your first matches.

The camera shows the Survivors drawing for matches.

Jeff: Our first match is Cirie against Ozzy. Let’s see what you will be doing.

Jeff reaches into another bag and takes out a ball. The ball has the number 4 on it; he takes the cover off the challenge board where number 4 is.

Jeff: This will be a spear toss. The question is this – how close to the target can you get from a distance of twenty-five feet?

Ozzy: I’ll do fifteen feet.

Cirie: You’re on.

Jeff: If Ozzy’s throw lands within fifteen feet of the target, he scores the challenge’s first point. If not, it goes to Cirie.

The camera shows Ozzy winding up to make his throw.

Jeff: Ozzy, you may fire when ready.

Ozzy winds up, gets a running start, and makes a magnificent toss that lands within feet of the target.

Jeff: It looks like you did it, Ozzy. I’ll go do the official measurement.

Jeff gets out a measure and records the distance between the target and Ozzy’s throw.

Jeff: We have seven feet and two inches. Ozzy scores a point.

On the challenge board, Jeff puts a tally next to Ozzy’s name.

Jeff: Next up is Danni against Paula. Let’s see what you’re doing.

He reaches into the bag and takes out a ball numbered 5. He peels off the cover corresponding to number 5 on the board.

Jeff: You will have to solve a mystery puzzle. It is one of the ten types of puzzles that you saw during the reward challenge on day 30. How quickly do you think you can solve it?

Danni: It will probably take me about ten minutes.

Paula: I’ll solve it in two.

Danni: You’re on.

Jeff: Paula has to solve the mystery puzzle in two minutes.

Jeff goes over to the puzzle and uncovers a word search.

Jeff: Just like the word search seen earlier, there are ten words, but only five are in here. You have two minutes. Ready? Go.

Paula quickly finds a word, but she struggles to locate another of the words. Time ticks as Paula locates another word.

Jeff: One minute.

Paula has only two words found; it takes her a few seconds to locate a third. The camera focuses in on the word, “RAROTONGA,” which is circled incorrectly on the search.

Paula finds one more word.

Jeff: Fifteen seconds.

As time runs down, Paula frantically looks for another word, finding one at the last minute.

Jeff: Time. Let’s see how you did.

Jeff inspects her work, which includes the circled word “RAROTOBA,” which is not accurate.

Jeff: Paula, there’s no such word as Rarotoba. Danni scores a point. Let’s see who’s up next.

The next set of matches is drawn.

Jeff: We have Cirie going against Danni; neither did a task last time, and one will this time. Let’s see what it is.

Jeff reaches into his bag and takes out number 6; he then peels back the cover corresponding to number 6.

Jeff: One of you will answer Survivor trivia questions. I have five questions; you will decide how many you think you can answer and how many times you think you will have to ask for multiple choice.

Danni: I can do three and ask for multiple choice twice.

Cirie: I’ll do three, but I don’t need multiple choice.

Danni: I’ll do four and only ask for multiple choice once.

Cirie: You’re on.

Jeff: Danni, I will ask you five Survivor questions. You need to get four right, and you can ask for multiple choice one time. If you miss two questions, Cirie gets the point. If you get four in a row, I will stop the task and you get the point. My first question is this. What Survivor: Vanuatu cast member demanded an apology from the final two contestants in their jury speech, an apology they received from only one contestant?

Danni pauses to think about the question.

Danni: Eliza.

Jeff: Eliza is correct. That’s one right. Next question. What Survivor: Guatemala castaway called the tribe “scumbags” while being voted out?

Danni: Judd.

Jeff: That’s two right. Next question. In three seasons that Exile Island was used, only one person sent themselves to Exile Island. Who was it?

Danni has to think about this one.

Danni (muttering): I know Yul got the idol there…it could have been Earl…

She pauses once again.

Danni: I’ll say Earl.

Jeff: Earl is incorrect. The correct answer is Yau-Man. You need to get these two right. Next question. In Cook Islands, one castaway revealed that they fell in love at first sight. With what fellow castaway did that person claim to have fallen in love.

Danni: Candice.

Jeff: Candice is correct. You have your multiple-choice still available. This last question is out of the first All-Stars season. Who was the only castaway to remain on the same tribe from the start of the game up until the merge?

Danni thinks about it for a second.

Danni: I’ll take the multiple choice.

Jeff: OK, your choices are Amber, Alicia, Kathy, or Shii Ann.

Danni thinks some more.

Danni (muttering): It’s not Kathy…and I don’t think it’s Shii Ann…

She points back and forth between two fingers on her hand.

Danni: The answer is Amber.

Jeff: Amber is correct. Danni scores a point.

The camera focuses on Ozzy and Paula.

Jeff: Ozzy and Paula, one of you will try to fill a bucket with water from a distance of ten feet. You will be blindfolded, and in order to pass the task, you have to raise the flag on the other end of the balance to the top. You have to decide how fast you can do it.

Paula: I can do it in eight minutes.

Ozzy: I’ll do it in six.

Paula: I’ll do it in five.

Ozzy: I can probably do it in four.

Paula: I’ll do it in two.

Ozzy: You’re on.

Jeff: Paula, go ahead and get into position. You will have two minutes to do it, but as an advantage, you can take off your blindfold for the final minute. Ready? Go.

Paula grabs her bucket and dashes for the ocean to fill it; she runs back and throws the water, missing wildly.

Jeff: Paula not off to a good start.

Paula continues to miss, filling the bucket only a little bit in three throws.

Jeff: Paula can take off her blindfold now.

Paula drops her blindfold and fills the bucket as quickly as she can; she throws it and actually connects.

Jeff: Paula getting the hang of it now.

Paula begins to fill the bucket, though it appears to be nowhere near enough.

Jeff: Fifteen seconds.

Paula throws one more bucketful of water, getting only a little bit in; she is nowhere near finished.

Jeff: Time. Ozzy scores.

The camera focuses on Ozzy and Danni.

Jeff: Cirie and Paula were one of the last two matches, but neither can catch up, so it comes down to Ozzy and Danni. One task will determine immunity. I’ll pick the task now.

Jeff reaches into his bag and picks number 7, which is shown to be “Consume 16 ounces of mystery food.”

Jeff: It is a food from the first reward challenge.

Ozzy: Is it fafaru?

Jeff: I don’t know.

Danni: I’ll finish it in three minutes.

Ozzy: You’re on.

Jeff: Danni, let’s learn what you have to eat.

Jeff uncovers a large bowl of beetle larvae.

Jeff: Danni, you have to get every beetle larva down in three minutes and show me an empty mouth to win immunity. If you don’t pull it off, Ozzy wins. Ready? Go.

Danni crams four larvae into her mouth and promptly spits them out.

Danni: Sorry, I can’t do this.

Jeff: Danni, are you giving up?

Danni: No. I’ll try.

Danni puts them back in and slowly chews on them; after one minute, she has only the four down.

Jeff: Danni making no progress at all. Each larva weighs less than an ounce.

Danni tries to eat them faster but gags; a half-chewed larva comes back up.

After two minutes, she is not even half done.

Jeff: Danni struggling a lot with this challenge. Less than one minute left.

Danni takes out one larva and eats it quickly; she does the same thing with the next one. She appears to be catching up.

Jeff: Fifteen seconds and four to go.

Danni crams three of them in her mouth; she chews quickly, but she struggles in swallowing them.

She puts the last one in her mouth.

Jeff: Time.

Danni spits out the last larva.

Danni: That was worse than fafaru.

Jeff: Danni can’t do it, so Ozzy wins immunity!

Jeff walks over to Ozzy and puts the immunity necklace on him.

Jeff: For the third time in a row, you cannot vote for Ozzy. Everyone else is vulnerable. Head on back to camp; I’ll see you tonight.

Images of Danni failing to eat the larva as well as Ozzy’s perfect spear toss dominate the screen as it cuts to commercial.

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2. "Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 - "This Is a Game for a Million Dollars, Not a Daytime Soap Opera""
Manhattan Island, 10:59 am. “Survivor: All-Stars II” contestant Charlie Forrest is being held at gunpoint by his ex-wife.

Dena subtlely moves her clothes from the top of her duffel bag and reaches into it, pulling out a large envelope. She continues to point the gun at Charlie.

Dena: I made a big mistake leaving you, Charlie. I just couldn’t handle it anymore.

Charlie: Handle what? Sitting around all day on you’re ass ignoring our son?

Dena: I did plenty around the house. All you did was go off and play with your Navy buddies while I kept the house running.

Charlie: Kept the house running. That’s rich. What about the time Derek went hungry just because you wouldn’t go get anything to eat?

Dena: That was your fault! You didn’t make enough money!

Charlie: I made plenty of money, and you know it! What about all the cigarette butts Derek and I had to pick out of the carpet? It’s a wonder you didn’t burn the place down!

Dena: That’s my right, and if you didn’t like it, maybe you shouldn’t have married me.

Charlie: Yeah, I thought about that, and that’s why I’m glad you left. Now I can get on with my life, and I did.

Dena: You’re lonely, and no one loves you. I’m your only chance. You can’t do better than pretend. Now sign this.

The envelope Dena was holding contained a marriage license; Dena took it out and handed him a pen.

Dena: Sign it, and we’re heading down to the church to get married.

Charlie: No pastor will marry us when I’m at gunpoint and you’re looking like that.

Dena: I think you’re forgetting just how powerful the threat of “do what I say or die” is.

At this point, a young man standing very tall and powerful walks up to the street corner.

New person: Wait, what the hell’s going on here? Dad, who the hell is—wait a minute.

I recognize him from the show as well. That’s Derek, Charlie’s son.

Derek: Drop the gun and get the hell out of here.

Dena: Nice try, son. Your dad and I are going and getting married, and we’re going to be a family again.

Derek: Over my dead body.

Dena: That can be arranged.

Dena points the gun at Derek instead of at Charlie.

Dena: You won’t do what I say for your own life, Charlie. Maybe you’ll listen when it’s your son’s life at stake.

Charlie: You sick, twisted bitch.

Dena: I love when you talk dirty. Maybe we should work on another one right here in New York.

Charlie: I’m done having kids, and from what I hear about your other son, you should be, too.

Derek: That’s right. You did the same thing to George that you did to us. Why the hell should we listen to you now?

Dena: Because if you don’t…

Dena raises her gun to point at Derek’s head.

At this point, a police car pulls over to the side of the road, and a cop gets out with his gun pointed.

Officer: Freeze! Hands in the air!

Dena: Take one step closer, Officer, and this goes from a mugging to a murder.

Officer: I’m going to need backup and a hostage negotiator.

The cop steps back as Dena tries to hand the marriage license to Charlie. He continually refuses to sign it.

Back from commercial.

Angakauitai Island, Maui camp, Day 37. Ozzy puts his immunity necklace on a tree as the final four Survivors arrive at camp.

(confessional) Ozzy: Now that I have immunity, it’s time to put my master plan into action. I’m going to see to it that the vote goes against Danni, since I think I can beat the other two in the next challenge.

Ozzy (to Danni): So what did you tell Paula?

Danni: I thought you said that was my business.

Ozzy: It is your business, but I can make conversation, can’t I?

Danni: Yeah, I guess. I told her it was my fault, but she’s still mad at both of us.

Ozzy: Is she voting for you?

Danni: Probably.

Ozzy: Well, who are you voting for?

Danni: Probably Paula. I don’t have a choice; I need to stay strong with Cirie.

(confessional) Danni: When we got back to camp, Ozzy was wondering if I talked to Paula about the night on the yacht. Of course, I didn’t say a word; I’m trying to get Paula voted out. I’ll beat Ozzy in a challenge, and then he’s gone and I can beat Cirie because all she’s done is ride my coattails.

Ozzy (to Paula): I’ve figured something out.

Paula: Really.

Ozzy: Danni completely made up that story about the night on the yacht. She didn’t seduce Charlie, and he didn’t seduce her. She’s lying.

Paula: And what gives you this idea?

Ozzy: She changed her story about it twice. Cirie said that it just sort of happened and that Charlie denied everything. At Council, Danni pinned it all on Charlie, but when she talked to me, she said she started it. She can’t keep her story straight; I’m pretty sure there’s no real story to it.

Paula: You understand my doubts about this.

Ozzy: Well, of course I do. But here’s one thing. Danni is absolutely convinced that Charlie’s son has a crush on Danni, and you saw how close Charlie was to his son.

Paula: Charlie and his son are best friends; I know that.

Ozzy: Would Charlie really betray his son like that? Or does it make more sense that Danni can’t keep her story straight because she made it up?

(confessional) Paula: Danni, you dirty, dirty bitch. It’s not bad enough that you stabbed your alliance in the back. You broke my heart, you broke Charlie’s heart, and worst of all, you broke his son’s heart. Charlie and I signed up for this, and we knew anything was possible, but to destroy a college kid like that is absolutely unforgivable. She’s going down.

Paula walks quickly over to Cirie.

Paula: We’re getting Danni out tonight.

Cirie: Why are we voting out our meal ticket?

Paula: Look, between you, me, and Ozzy, any of us can win. I want that deluded bitch out, because she actually thinks she can beat you.

Cirie: Excuse me? That’s crazy, and she knows it.

Paula: And get this. You know how Charlie said she was lying about the night on the yacht, and we didn’t believe him?

Cirie: Yeah, I didn’t really believe him, either.

Paula: Ozzy believed him, and Ozzy was right.

(confessional) Cirie: You have got to be f---ing kidding me. Paula told me everything about the little trick that Danni pulled to get ahead in the game. I’ve seen backstabbing, and I’ve seen mean tricks, but this just tops them all.

Paula: Let’s make sure she doesn’t hear about this until Council.

Cirie: No problem.

The camera shows a sunset and then switches to the four remaining Maui members walking in and lighting their torches. Ozzy and Danni sit in the back row while Cirie and Paula sit in the front.

Jeff: We will now bring in the jury. Jonathan, Harriet, Tom, Twila, Yau-Man, Terry…and Charlie, voted out at the last Tribal Council.

Charlie walks in wearing a Navy t-shirt and a pair of khakis and hiking boots; he has shaved his beard and cut his hair extremely short.

Jeff: Ozzy, right now, you’re the only person who is safe, and we know this because the other three people can’t use an idol. Do you feel like you would still be safe if not for immunity?

Ozzy: You can’t ever believe that, especially now, when idols are useless. I have the immunity necklace, I came in wanting the immunity necklace, and it‘s the only thing that’s saved me tonight.

Jeff: Danni, is that accurate?

Danni: Getting Ozzy out has been a priority since the merge. We just haven’t had the chance. He’s been immune so many times.

Jeff: There have been a couple of times he wasn’t immune, though. Why not get him out then?

Danni: We tried. Usually, we didn’t have the votes.

Jeff: So getting Ozzy out has just been a priority of yours.

Danni: And my alliance.

Jeff: Cirie, you’ve been aligned with Danni since the beginning. Is that accurate?

Cirie: Sort of. Ozzy’s won, what, four immunities? Plus there was that time Maria was evacuated, and that didn’t leave us with a lot of opportunities. We honestly thought, with lots of big, strong players here, we would have more chances to get him out.

Jeff: Paula, Ozzy has a bit of a reputation as the Survivor warrior stemming from the Cook Islands season. Is it daunting?

Paula: He may not be beatable in immunities, but you have to consider your own strengths. He didn’t win his own season because someone else was better, so even if he’s the best player in the game at what he does, I have to do what I do and convince people that I played a better game.

Jeff: What are your strengths?

Paula: I’ve tried to be a very clever player. I’ve been in an alliance since the beginning with Charlie and Danni that was supposed to get us to the final three.

Jeff: I saw how that ended when you found out about the night on the yacht.

Paula: And then we figured out today that what Danni said happened never actually took place.

Jeff’s face falls forward in near shock; his jaw hangs open.

Jeff: Danni, how do you respond to this?

Danni: I don’t know what Paula’s talking about. I told nothing but the truth about the night on the yacht.

Paula: You told nothing but a bunch of s---. Come on, Danni. There’s no way you got a completely drunk Charlie to do anything besides sleep. Come on; he’s 44 and in a lot of pain.

Danni: Look, it’s not my fault Charlie wanted to rip my clothes off on the yacht!

Ozzy (shouting): And there you go changing your story again. At camp, she said she was the one who started it. Now she’s saying it’s Charlie’s fault. We all know she can’t keep her story straight.

The camera focuses on Charlie, who silently applauds Ozzy’s speech.

Jeff: From looking at the jury here, Charlie’s about ready to walk over and award the million to Ozzy right now. Paula, you were in a relationship with Charlie before this. You thought he betrayed you, and now you find out he didn’t. What does that mean to you?

Paula: It means I’m not always right. I looked at the facts, and it seemed to me that Charlie and Danni stepped over a line they shouldn’t have crossed, but I looked closely at it, and Charlie just looked like he stepped over the line because Danni dragged him over it while she obliterated the line.

Jeff: Are you upset now with yourself for not trusting Charlie?

Paula: Not anywhere near as upset as I am with Danni for lying like that. Part of our deal was that Danni would get final three if she helped me and Charlie to the end, and when the car challenge came up, we would let her have it. We held up our end of the deal.

Jeff: What was her end of the deal?

Paula: She would pretend to be in a relationship with Charlie and keep it in her best interests to make sure we all got far enough in the game that the three of us became all-powerful. At the same time, she would teach Charlie how to be more easy-going with me.

Jeff: Danni, whose idea was this whole plan?

Danni: It was all my idea. Charlie and Paula helped figure some things out with how to do it. It’s not my fault something happened to screw it all up on the yacht.

Paula (furious): Damnit, Danni, just drop the whole act. We all know nothing happened on the yacht, and we’re sick of listening to you try to bulls--- us. I told off a really great guy because of you, and now he’s sitting over there out of luck because you decided that a shot at second place wasn’t good enough. You’re a f---ing past winner; you can’t possibly win again. We just wanted to help you get far in the game, and you f---ed us. Now Charlie can’t possibly trust me, and when people see this, they’ll f---ing hate your guts.

Danni: Listen, Paula, it’s not my fault—

Paula (yelling and almost crying): Go to hell, Danni. Go f--- yourself.

Jeff: Cirie, did you have any idea that Danni was lying?

Cirie: Some, but my gut told me she wasn’t. She might have been a bitch, but she wasn’t that bad. At least I didn’t think she was.

Jeff: Danni, do you have anything to say to defend yourself?

Danni: I’m not lying. I’m telling the truth. What happened on the yacht is very important. I thought Paula should know; if she doesn’t want to believe that Charlie slept with me, she can delude herself.

Jeff: Ozzy, you have the immunity necklace. Any chance of giving it up?

Ozzy: None whatsoever.

Jeff: OK, you cannot vote for Ozzy. Anyone else is fair game. It is time to vote. Paula, you’re up.

Paula gets up to vote; she votes for Danni.

Paula (to voting camera): We had a deal. You broke the deal in the worst way. You don’t deserve one red cent of the money. Go to hell.

Paula sits back down and stares daggers at Danni; after this, Cirie gets up to vote. Her vote is not shown.

The next to vote is Ozzy; his vote is not shown.

Last to vote is Danni; she votes Paula.

Danni (to voting camera): Sorry, Paula, but second place isn’t good enough for me.

Danni sits back down, and the camera switches to Jeff.

Jeff: I’ll go tally the votes.

The camera focuses on a defiant Paula, a confident-looking Danni, a frustrated Cirie, and a complacent Ozzy; a quick glance at the jury shows Charlie in the center looking satisfied.

The camera goes back to Jeff, who has the voting urn.

Jeff: Once the votes are read, the decision is final; the person voted out will be asked to leave the Tribal Council area immediately. I’ll read the votes.

Jeff takes out the first vote.

Jeff: First vote…Paula.

Danni’s vote.

Jeff: …Danni. One vote Danni, one vote Paula.

This is Paula’s vote. Danni appears offended by the vote.

Jeff: …Danni. Two votes Danni, one vote Paula.

This appears to be in Ozzy’s handwriting.

Jeff: …the sixteenth person voted out of Survivor: All-Stars II and the eighth member of the jury…Danni. That’s three votes; that’s enough. There’s no need to check for idols. Danni, you need to bring me your torch.

A quick shot of the jury shows Charlie receiving high-fives and fist-pounds from everyone; Tom pats him on the back, and he says something unknown to Yau-Man.

Danni places her torch in the holster, still appearing shocked by the vote.

Jeff: Danni, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Danni’s torch.

Danni: I’m sorry you guys think I’m a liar.

Paula: Shut the hell up and get out of here.

Danni turns around and leaves.

Jeff: A lot’s been said tonight, and someone that many people thought couldn’t win is gone from the game. One thing’s for sure, though, and that’s that there’s one challenge left before the final two is decided. Head on back to camp; I’ll see you tomorrow morning.

The screen briefly shows the three remaining Maui filing out of Tribal Council before switching to Danni.

Danni (final words): I tried to get myself farther in the game, and I guess I failed. I got greedy and decided that second or third place in All-Stars wasn’t good enough, and greed just took over. I do feel bad about hurting Charlie and Paula, and I hope I can make it up to them sometime.

3 votes Danni: Cirie, Ozzy, Paula
1 vote Paula: Danni

The screen cuts to commercial.

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3. "Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 - "This Is a Game for a Million Dollars, Not a Daytime Soap Opera""
Manhattan Island, 11:21 am. Escaped inmate Dena Goodman is holding up her ex-husband and son at gunpoint, and an officer has arrived at the scene.

Dena: Officer?

Officer: Yes, ma’am?

Dena: I think I’m ready to start talking. First, I need a minister who’s licensed to perform weddings.

Officer: Why would you need that?

Dena: I’m marrying this man right here in New York City.

Dena waves her gun in Charlie’s direction.

Officer: Ma’am, no minister will perform ceremonies at gunpoint.

Dena: What’s the matter, Officer? Haven’t you ever heard of a shotgun wedding?

Derek: Well, maybe you need a real shotgun for that.

Dena fires a bullet at Derek’s foot; she misses, but he leaps back.

Dena: This is no time for jokes, young man. Once your father and I are married, you’re grounded for an entire month.

Derek: Yeah, like that will ever happen. That might have scared me the last time you saw me, which was…oh, right, when I was ten.

Dena: You just don’t give up, do you? You stand here and defy your own mother, and that’s with me holding a gun in my hand. I can’t imagine how intolerable you would be if I didn’t have the gun.

Derek: I wouldn’t be here if you didn’t have this damn gun. I would probably be off enjoying life. Instead, I’m here listening to the insane ramblings of some crazy bitch to whom time has not been kind at all. What are you up to now, four packs a day?

Dena: Damnit, that’s it. You’re going to military school.

Derek: Look lady, you might—

Dena: Excuse me?

Derek: I said you might have better luck with the actual military. I’m 21 now, not 10. Apparently that isn’t getting through to you.

Dena (angrily): Never call me “lady” again, you hear me? Never!

Derek: Oh, I’m sorry. You’re right. No lady would strip to her underwear in public and wave a gun in people’s faces demanding that they marry her.

Female voice: Oh my God, we’re too late! I came as fast as I could!

Derek’s head turns to see Danni Boatwright standing on the other side of the street.

Derek (shouting): YOU! I’ll kill you! Once I finish with this psycho woman, I’m coming after you! Get the hell out of here!

Danni: I’m sorry I did that!

Derek: Sorry doesn’t mean a damn thing to me!

Danni: I didn’t mean to break up your dad and Paula!

Derek: Well, you did, and look where it’s gotten us. So just go away before you cause any more trouble!

Danni: I can fix this! I can stop your—oh my God, is that your mother?

Derek: What the hell is it to you?

Danni: Well, I see you got your good looks from your dad!

Dena: If you say one more word, I blow my boy’s head off, you hear?

Danni gets deathly silent and slinks back around the corner.

Dena: Now where was I? Ah yes. The marriage license. And that minister had better be here soon.

Two more police cars arrive on scene, and a man dressed in holy man’s clothes steps out of the car.

Back from commercial.

Angakauitai Island, Maui camp, Night 37. Cirie, Ozzy, and Paula are the final three.

Paula is still shaken up; Ozzy and Cirie are helping her back to camp.

Paula (sobbing): I trusted her. I let her ruin my life.

Ozzy: No one ruined anyone’s life.

Paula: This game is just too rough. It brings out the worst in people.

Ozzy: It brings out the best in people, too. Look how far you came. Your life is changed for the better.

(confessional) Paula: I can’t imagine right now how my life is changed for the better. I left my kids for another six weeks just to come out here and play this damn game again, and I lost my chance at loving the best guy in the world. I wish I had just stayed home.

Cirie (to Paula): I saw how you changed, Paula. You’re not the person you were before.

Paula: I wish I still was. I was a fighter. I never cried. All I do out here is cry.

Cirie: It’s OK to be upset. It’s OK to admit you’re wrong.

Paula: I never admit I’m wrong. I’ve never been wrong. And now I’m wrong in the worst way.

Cirie: I know it’s hard. But you just have two more days.

Paula (crying): I want to go home now. I want to forget I was ever here.

(confessional) Cirie: Paula had a breakdown when we got back to camp. It’s not easy being stabbed in the back by a close friend. I hope she wakes up tomorrow and realizes that Charlie loves her and that everything’s just fine.

Paula has laid down in the shelter; Ozzy and Cirie are still trying to console her.

Ozzy: Paula, please get some sleep. I promise you will feel better tomorrow.

Paula: I wish I had never come on Survivor. My kids need me. They don’t need me here. My sister’s in the hospital for this; I have no idea who’s taking care of my kids now.

Ozzy: I’m sure they’re fine; hopefully they’re with Jim.

Paula: You’re right, you’re right.

(confessional) Ozzy: Paula and Charlie aren’t just another Rob and Amber situation where they live off fame and don’t have a care in the world. There’s something genuine about them.

Angakauitai Island, Maui camp, Day 38. The sun is beginning to rise on the island, and the tribe wakes up to find a basket waiting for them on their beach.

The first to open it is Cirie; it contains a message.

Cirie (from the note): Paddle yourselves to this site on Taravai Island, where you will pay your respects to those who have fallen before you. At the end of the trail, you will reach your final immunity challenge.

The three remaining Maui grab the basket and get into their canoe; the camera shows them leaving the island.

A couple of shots of the Survivors rowing in the open ocean appear as well; the sun, which has risen by this time, reflects boldly off the ocean.

Finally, the three Survivors dock at a trail on Taravai Island. A note awaits them there as well; the note is carved into a flat piece of wood, from which Ozzy reads.

Ozzy (from the note): Follow the trail; the torches of seventeen Survivors will mark your path.

The Survivors begin on the trail and soon arrive at the torch of Sandra Diaz-Twine, the first castaway voted out of the game.

Ozzy: Good old Sandra. She came all the way back here, and we voted her out first.

Paula: Sorry about that, by the way.

Ozzy: You got her voted out, didn’t you?

Paula: And I regretted it the next day.

The camera shows Sandra helping to carry the torch during Quest for Fire as well as some clips of her around camp.

Sandra (voice-over): I’ve been the winner, and I’ve been the first one out. I’ve done everything I can in Survivor, and I am grateful for the chance to play and make myself better.

The three Survivors reach Ami’s torch; Paula grabs around her torch.

Ozzy: I wish she was still here. I miss her every day out here.

Paula: She really wasn’t all that bad; she just needed to be more careful.

Ozzy: I got her voted out. I’m so stupid early in the game.

The camera shows Ami’s spirited fights with Maria as well as some planning sessions with Ozzy.

Ami (voice-over): I came here to prove that I belonged, but I ended up proving that I didn’t. My tribe was great, but I always felt like I let them down.

The next torch is that of Chris, the first to be on a tribe with Cirie.

Cirie: Here was a guy who had no chance to win, but he just didn’t care.

Paula: Still watching him drag Tom down by his ankle was the funniest thing ever.

Cirie: When it happened, I wanted to kill him. Now I’m glad he did it.

The camera shows Chris grabbing Tom by the ankle and arguing with him on the bamboo challenge set.

Chris (voice-over): I should have been gone first in my own season, but I won it all. I came back just to see how far I could go and to have a little fun.

The next torch in line is Yul’s.

Cirie: I wish he had stuck around.

Ozzy: You and me both. I wasn’t finished with him.

Cirie: Hey, you don’t need to settle any scores.

Ozzy: No score-settling; I just thought he was a hell of a nice guy.

The camera shows Yul trying to block during the Attack Zone challenge as well as dealing with others at Fati’s camp.

Yul (voice-over): A lot of people consider me a great player. The definition of a great player is one who can work with any situation. I walked into chaos here, and I lost. I still have a lot to learn.

After Yul, the three Survivors arrive at Parvati’s torch.

Ozzy: I’m still sorry we trashed her the way we did.

Paula: I’m sorry we were so rough on her. She might be wild and a loose cannon, but she’s still one of us.

Ozzy: She didn’t change a bit from my season.

Cirie: I thought she was going far, and if she hadn’t gone nuts, I would have loved for her to go far.

The camera shows Parvati flirting with Maria during the Matchmaker challenge as well as attacking her in the Attack Zone challenge.

Parvati (voice-over): I took my strategy too far, and it stopped paying off for me. I’m not easy, and I would never try to hurt people. It killed me when people thought I did.

The next torch after Parvati is Danielle.

Cirie: I’m glad I got to face off with her one more time.

Ozzy: I miss her, too. I hated sending her away.

Cirie: I hated having her on the other side.

The camera shows Danielle building her fire at Tribal Council.

Danielle (voice-over): I’m living proof that one careless mistake can be enough to wreck your entire game plan.

The next torch on the trail is Ian’s.

Paula: Poor guy. He went home when I should have gone home.

Ozzy: We did everything to get rid of you, Paula. And you still outsmarted us.

Paula: I wish it wasn’t him that left, though.

The camera shows Ian fighting Tom during the Sumo at Sea challenge.

Ian (voice-over): I lost to one stray vote, and now I’m the guy who couldn’t beat Tom Westman. I guess there are just some things I can’t do.

The next torch after Ian’s is that of Rafe.

Cirie: He was in a bad situation on our tribe.

Paula: He was in a fine situation on our tribe.

Ozzy: Yeah, right after I tried to get him out.

Paula: He was way too nice for the early part of the game.

The camera shows Rafe taking down Terry in the Sumo at Sea challenge.

Rafe (voice-over): I thought I could just slip by unseen for most of the game and then surprise people again, but I guess people were already onto me. I needed a new game plan.

The next torch after Rafe is that of Jonathan.

Cirie: It’s too bad he was so odd; he was such a hard worker.

Paula: Tell me about it. He lied and he backstabbed, but I know he was a hard player.

Ozzy: A little too hard, sometimes.

The camera shows Jonathan catching fish and working hard at camp.

Jonathan (voice-over): It was a hard lesson to realize that I don’t fit in on Survivor, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t enjoyed the experience.

After Jonathan, the next torch belongs to Harriet.

Paula: I know she was kind of the bad guy, but I really learned to like her.

Ozzy: She’s an older woman, but she’s tough. I’ll always respect her.

Cirie: She’s a lot tougher than she lets on.

The camera shows Harriet at camp, including the scene where she cut her knee with a machete.

Harriet (voice-over): I’ve made a life as a fighter and as someone who does what I need to in order to get ahead. Survivor is the first time I’ve actually had fun doing it.

The Survivors move onto the next torch, that of Tom.

Cirie (tearing up): I still miss Tom.

Ozzy: He was the best there was and maybe the best there ever will be.

Paula: He’s a hell of a nice guy; that’s for sure.

Cirie: Yes, yes he is.

The camera shows Tom in the Sumo at Sea challenge and in the dodgeball game.

Tom (voice-over): I was pretty sure coming into this game I wasn’t going to win, but I wanted to prove that I could compete with the best, and I think I did that.

After Tom, the next torch is that of Maria. Three Princeton emblems are hanging from the torch; the Survivors each take one.

Paula (tearing up): It’s not her fault this happened to her. I still can’t believe I wanted to vote her out.

Ozzy: Maria would do anything for anyone. I don’t care if she did win her season, and I don’t care if she was a nudist; she deserved better.

Cirie: Maria was always there to bring you up and make you laugh.

The camera shows Maria lighting her clothes on fire in the lockbox challenge.

Maria (voice-over): To be out of the game this way is heartbreaking, but I am glad I made the most of my first opportunity. I enjoyed the chance to play again, and I feel like I grew up a lot out here.

After Maria, the saddened Survivors walk onto Twila’s torch.

Cirie: Now here was a fighter.

Ozzy: I always knew we had a firecracker in her.

Paula: She’s like a crazy version of me. You have to love her.

The camera shows Twila hanging on during her last reward challenge.

Twila (voice-over): I was blessed with the chance to play the game once, and to play it again with the group of people I was with is unbelievable. I did it to make my son proud of me, and I can honestly say that I believe I succeeded.

Moving on, the next torch is Yau-Man’s.

Paula: Thanks for everything, Yau-Man. You were always a good friend and a loyal soldier.

Cirie: And a real character.

Ozzy: And the fiercest competitor I’ve ever seen. He would cut off an arm if he thought it would get him farther in the game.

The camera shows Yau-Man winning the 4X4 immunity challenge and helping to light the lockbox structure on fire.

Yau-Man (voice-over): I never expected to play the game even once. To play it twice and do well both times is a dream come true. I have learned a lot and will take many friendships from the game.

The Survivors walk past Yau-Man’s torch to Terry’s.

Paula: I never understood Terry. One minute, he was the hard-working competitor; the next, he was a complete whack job.

Ozzy: I think it takes Terry to understand Terry.

Cirie: I got farther in the game than he did, and I settled the score with him. We’re even, and he’ll always have my respect.

The camera shows Terry constructing the Maui shelter and talking trash with Charlie on the logrolling set.

Terry (voice-over): I was a little out of my element this time, and I don’t think I had as much fun as I hoped. I would still do it again, and in my wildest dreams, I hope to.

The next torch on the trail is Charlie’s.

Paula (sobbing and kneeling at his torch): I’m so sorry. I hope you can forgive me.

Ozzy (kneeling next to her): He will. He’s a hell of a guy.

Cirie: You got that right.

Ozzy: He loves you, Paula, and so does his son.

Cirie: I miss his stories. He always told the best stories.

The camera shows Charlie winning the water barrel challenge and enjoying the movie with Danni.

Charlie (voice-over): I’ve gone out of the game twice in profoundly frustrating ways, and it never gets any easier. I have a lot of respect for the people who play this game, and I hope one day to lose to something other than a heart attack or heartbreak.

The Survivors reach the last torch on the trail, that of Danni.

Before anyone can speak a word, Paula stands back and spits at Danni’s torch and walks ahead.

Paula (muttering): That’s what you get, you greedy bitch.

Cirie: No one deserves to go through what Danni did to everyone here.

Ozzy: Honestly, though, except for that lie, she was a hell of a player.

The camera shows Danni at the logrolling challenge against Paula.

Danni (voice-over): I should have known going in that I wasn’t going to win and just accepted it. I had a chance at a lot of great prizes and a chance to forge a lot of friendships, and I blew it. I’ll regret this for the rest of my life.

The Survivors arrive at a structure made of bamboo that has many mementos of the game and each of the Survivors.

Ozzy takes a lit torch and sets fire to one corner of it.

He passes the torch to Cirie, who lights another corner.

Paula lights a third corner.

The three light the final corner together, and the camera shows the structure going up in flames as the Survivors look on.

Images of the Survivors watching the structure go up in flames dominate the screen as it cuts to commercial.

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08-28-07, 03:05 PM (EST)
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4. "Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 - "This Is a Game for a Million Dollars, Not a Daytime Soap Opera""
Manhattan Island, 11:44 am. Four police officers and a minister are on the scene of a hostage situation involving “Survivor” contestant Charlie Forrest, his son, his ex-wife, and fellow castmate Danni Boatwright.

The first officer seems to be the one doing most of the speaking.

Officer: We have brought in a minister. He will perform the ceremony as long as the groom agrees to it under his own power.

Dena: Well, go on, Charlie. Tell the minister you want to marry me.

Charlie spits at Dena’s feet. She responds by taking the gun and pointing it directly at his temple.

Dena: That’s it. I’ve had enough of this. You either tell the minister you want to marry me or I splatter your brains all over the sidewalk.

Charlie: I’d rather be dead than married to you.

Officer: The minister will only perform the ceremony if the groom is not coerced.

The minister takes a megaphone and approaches the front of the police line. He speaks with a subtle but noticeable Italian accent.

Minister: I came here to perform a wedding ceremony, but I cannot perform it under these circumstances.

Dena: If you don’t marry us right here and right now, Charlie dies. You can perform a wedding or a funeral. It’s your choice.

Minister: Listen, madam, the fact that you have gone to all this trouble tells me that you yourself are deeply troubled. Clearly you love this man, am I right?

Dena: I never stopped.

Minister: Well, madam, why do you try to force this man to marry you? If you love him, you must let him go free, and if he stays with you, he is yours.

Dena: I let him go once. He never came back, and now I have no choice but to bring him back.

Minister: Why did you let him go in the first place?

Dena: All he ever did was work. He paid no attention to me, so I just sat at home and rotted away. I got tired of it, and I just left.

Minister: Who is the other man here?

Derek: I’m her son—

Dena: You will not speak! One more word out of you and you die!

Minister: Families cannot be founded on the threat of violence.

Derek: It’s the only thing that kept my dad from leaving her!

Dena cocks the gun and aims it directly at Derek’s temple.

Dena: Anything else to say?

Derek says nothing.

Dena: That’s what I thought.

Dena fires the bullet into the air.

In the background, one officer raises two fingers to another.

Minister: Why does your son speak so harshly to you?

Dena: He’s a little jerk, and it comes from being raised by his father. That’s what happens when you let men raise children.

Minister: Many fathers are wonderful and worthy of their children’s respect and adoration.

Dena: Not this one. I should have taken Derek with me, but I forgot him and I never got the chance to come back.

Minister: You don’t just forget a child. You might forget many things, but a child is not one of them—

Dena (shouting): That’s it! The next person that judges me like this dies!

Dena cocks her gun and fires at the minister. The minister drops to the ground and does not appear to move.

Back from commercial.

Taravai Island, Day 38. The Survivors arrive in a valley with an open field surrounded by a thick forest-like area of trees.

As they walk in, the challenge field is lined with a quarter-circle of flags, with Survivor: Borneo’s flag on the left and all other Survivor flags up to Survivor: Japan in chronological order going right.

A challenge set – three dark-colored, rough platforms, hanging chains, and a water area – is in front of the flags, and in front of the challenge area is a larger flag displaying the Survivor: All-Stars II logo.

Jeff is somewhat to the right as the Survivors file in.

Jeff: Welcome to your final immunity challenge. First thing’s first – Ozzy, I’ll take it back.

Ozzy hands over the immunity necklace, and Jeff hangs it on the stick next to him.

Jeff: For the final time, immunity is back up for grabs. Today’s challenge is simple, and it will test endurance and how badly you want to win. It is for immunity. The three of you will stand barefoot on the platforms and hang onto the grips at the end of the chains. The chains are designed for your individual heights.

The camera focuses on an overview of the challenge set.

Jeff: The platforms are not like anything we have used before; instead of solid wood, they are containers for coal. You will be standing on rough, jagged coal for the challenge, and all you have to do is not fall off. If you fall into the water, you’re out. The last person in the water wins immunity and is guaranteed a fifty-fifty shot at a million dollars. For the losers, tonight’s Tribal Council could easily spell doom for you. You are allowed to hang onto the grips and not touch the platform, but that may present problems of its own. Everyone take off your shoes and head to your platforms.

The camera shows everyone climbing across wooden planks to reach their platforms. Cirie appears uncomfortable on the platform.

Jeff: The challenge will begin in three, two, one…and we’re underway. This is arguably the most brutal challenge we have ever had here for the final immunity. Ozzy, you’ve been through a challenge of this magnitude before. How does this compare?

Ozzy: This is a lot harder. I wasn’t standing on coals in the Cook Islands.

Jeff: Cirie, you look like you’re already struggling. Are you holding up OK?

Cirie: I’ll be all right.

Jeff: Paula, how are you holding up?

Paula: Never better, Jeff.

Elapsed time: 15 minutes. All three Survivors are hanging onto their grips trying not to put too much weight on their feet.

Jeff: We’re now at 15 minutes. How’s everyone doing?

Cirie is clearly struggling and is holding onto the edges of the platform with her feet.

Jeff: Cirie looking like she’s struggling. Paula, what about you?

Paula: My kids used to leave Matchbox cars all over the floor. This is no different.

Jeff: Ozzy, are you in danger if you lose?

Ozzy: We’re all in danger if we lose.

Jeff: Anyone thinking it’s time to give up?

No one answers him.

Elapsed time: 27 minutes. Ozzy and Paula are holding up, but Cirie is struggling mightily and standing on the balls of her feet.

Jeff: The water is about a foot below your platform and is a few feet deep. It might feel good on your feet right about now.

Ozzy: And it might feel even better later.

Jeff: So no chance of dropping, Ozzy?

Ozzy: None.

At this time, Cirie loses her grip and falls into the water.

Jeff: Cirie is out of the challenge. Ozzy and Paula, you’re 28 minutes in, and the last Survivor standing will win immunity.

The camera shows Ozzy standing on the balls of his feet; Paula is flat on the coals.

Ozzy: Hey Paula, if I step down, will you take me to the final two?

Paula: I haven’t thought that far ahead. If you don’t think you can beat me, you’re better off trying to convince me to take you after the challenge.

Jeff: I think she just said “Game on,” Ozzy.

Ozzy: That’s cool.

Elapsed time: 1 hour. Neither Ozzy nor Paula is struggling; both have their hands firmly on the grips and their feet flat on the coals.

Jeff: We have just passed one hour into the challenge. Paula, what hurts the most?

Paula: What do you think hurts?

Jeff: Ozzy, the same?

Ozzy: The coal cuts into my feet, and that’s what kills me.

Jeff: You can always try to cut a deal again.

Ozzy: That hasn’t worked too well for me.

Jeff: Paula, Ozzy’s won four immunity challenges. What’s to stop him from winning five here?

Paula: You’re looking at her.

Jeff: You’ve never won an immunity challenge.

Paula: That’s what they all say right before the first big win.

Jeff: Ozzy, that’s a lot of tough talk coming from Paula. Are you worried?

Ozzy: No more worried than she should be.

Jeff: Any chance of either of you not using the platforms?

Paula: I like the platform. It’s nice and comfortable.

Jeff: Ozzy, do you believe that?

Ozzy: In her dreams it’s comfortable.

Elapsed time: 1 hour 30 minutes. Ozzy is struggling a bit more; Paula appears not to be.

Jeff: We’re at ninety minutes now. How close are we to the end of the challenge?

Ozzy: That’s up to her.

Jeff: She looks like she’s doing better than you.

Ozzy: That’s only because I want her to see me struggle. I’m holding up just fine.

Jeff: Paula, have you seen Ozzy struggle out here?

Paula: It’s very rare. Ozzy is a superman.

Jeff: I take it there’s no chance of a deal.

Paula: I wouldn’t accept one. I’m here to win. I want the jury to see that necklace around my neck and know that they’re facing me tomorrow.

Jeff: Ozzy, is that about how you feel?

Ozzy: I know they probably expect me to be wearing that necklace tonight. I have an awfully big reputation to live up to, and I know that I have to live up to it.

The camera shows both Ozzy and Paula appearing to do well.

Elapsed time: 1 hour 56 minutes. Both Ozzy and Paula appear comfortable.

Jeff: We’re not far from two hours, guys. Ozzy, the last challenge that was endurance, what was your secret?

Ozzy: I found that it was really helpful to hang on longer than anyone else.

Jeff: Paula, is there anything you’ve learned about this type of challenge?

Paula: Yeah, just one thing. (pause, then shouting) Ozzy, what the hell is that?

Ozzy doesn’t even flinch; he adjusts his feet, and he settles in.

Jeff: Psyching your opponent out works only some of the time.

Elapsed time: 2 hours 17 minutes. Both Ozzy and Paula are beginning to struggle.

Jeff: It’s been a long time since you guys got up there. Anything that’s really hurting?

Paula: My back’s starting to get to me.

Jeff: Ozzy, what about you?

Ozzy: I need to hang.

Ozzy lifts himself up off the platform, hanging above it.

He lets his feet dangle as he swings just a bit from front to back.

Jeff: Ozzy trying something different. Paula, any chance of you trying that?

Paula: None.

Ozzy’s right hand slips, and he loses his grip. He starts to swing wildly.

He reaches up for his left-hand grip, but he misses and swings from the left grip until he lands back on the platform.

As he lands, he flops over but hangs onto his grip.

Jeff: Very close call for Ozzy.

Ozzy continues to struggle and try to grab his right grip; when he does, he loses his left grip and flies off the platform, losing his grip and falling into the water.

Jeff: Ozzy’s in the water! Paula wins the final immunity challenge!

Paula jumps in the water and wades over to Jeff, who has the immunity necklace.

Jeff: Paula, you’re one of the final two. You will be facing the jury tomorrow. I’ll see you guys at Tribal Council tonight.

Images of Paula staying on the platform and Ozzy falling in dominate the screen as it cuts to commercial.

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Colonel Zoidberg 3370 desperate attention whore postings
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08-28-07, 03:06 PM (EST)
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5. "Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 - "This Is a Game for a Million Dollars, Not a Daytime Soap Opera""
Manhattan Island, 12:02 pm. Escaped inmate Dena Goodman appears to have shot a minister who was negotiating for the safety of two hostages.

Police surround the fallen minister as the sergeant calls for further backup. Within minutes, officers, paramedics, and bystanders are on the scene.

The minister appears to be taken away on a stretcher as an ambulance pulls away. He does not appear to have moved.

Sergeant: We have you surrounded! Put the gun down and put your hands up! You are under arrest for attempted murder!

Dena (hysterical): It’ll be real murder if anyone comes closer!

Sergeant: We have snipers surrounding the entire area! There is no way out!

Dena: Go find the minister and make sure he’s not pressing charges! And bring him back here; he has a wedding to perform!

Sergeant: The minister is on the way to the hospital, and if he dies, you will be charged with murder. There are several witnesses; a conviction is all but guaranteed.

Dena: And the minister will still be just as dead. I came here for one reason, and that was to marry the man of my dreams. I did not come this far to be told that it’s hopeless.

Sergeant: Our paramedics are working on making sure that the minister lives, and that is your only hope for escaping a lengthy prison sentence right now.

Dena: Oh, is it, now?

Sergeant: Turn yourself in now and you may be able to plead guilty to a lesser charge.

Dena: I’m not going to prison.

Sergeant: At this point, that’s highly unlikely.

Dena: Either back off or both these men here die. I have enough bullets left to do it. Is it really worth risking the lives of New Your City’s finest just to save the lives of a couple of reality show veterans? Let them die, drop the charges, and let’s get on with life. If anything, I’m doing the world a favor by getting rid of both of them.

Derek: Hey, isn’t it about time you had a smoke? When’s the last time you had one—

Dena (shouting): Stop throwing off my concentration!

Derek: Yeah, it’s a little hard to concentrate when a psychotic middle-aged stalker in her underwear is waving a gun she doesn’t know how to fire.

Dena: You really think I don’t know how to shoot?

Derek: Yeah, that’s what I said.

Dena: Well, it’s about time I shot you.

Derek: Well, go ahead and do it.

Dena points the gun directly at Derek’s head and cocks it.

Derek: Well, go on; what are you waiting for?

Dena: I can’t believe you’re actually inviting me to shoot you right between the eyes.

Derek: Well, come on; what the hell are you waiting for, a written invitation?

Dena’s arm is visibly shaking; her aim is extremely unsteady.

Derek: I bet you miss that cigarette right about now. Four packs a day, and all of a sudden you can’t have it at the most important time of your life. Sure would calm the shakes, wouldn’t it?

Dena fires her gun, aiming for Derek’s head.

Derek doesn’t even flinch, and the bullet bounces off a brick wall.

Derek: That’s four bullets gone, bitch. Two more shots and you go back to prison in tears. Oh yeah, and one more thing.

Dena looks at him defiantly with her gun still pointed at his head.

Derek: Put some damn clothes on; you look like a sunburned crocodile, you ugly skank.

Dena cocks her gun one more time and fires at Derek’s chest.

Again, she misses wide and Derek is unharmed.

Derek: You have one bullet left and the worst aim in the world. Just give up and turn yourself in now.

Dena: I have a better idea.

Dena opens up her duffel bag; her gun is still pointed at Derek.

Inside, she takes out a box with some wires on it.

She opens up the box and sets it on the ground.

Inside the box is a time bomb.

Sergeant: Oh my sweet Jesus, she’s got a bomb.

Derek: OK, where the hell did you get a bomb?

Dena: That’s inconsequential. The bottom line is this. Charlie!

Charlie: Yeah, what the hell do you want?

Dena: This time bomb is set for fifteen minutes. You have that long to decide to marry me. If you still don’t want to, everyone here dies. Only I know how to diffuse the bomb.

Dena huddles over the bomb and presses a combination on the keypad; the timer, which is set for 15:00, ticks down to 14:59 and begins a countdown.

Back from commercial.

Angakauitai Island, Maui camp, Day 38. The three remaining Maui are arriving back at camp. Paula hangs up her immunity necklace.

(confessional) Paula: I probably could have counted on Ozzy taking me to the final two, but it’s still a lot better feeling to have it in my possession. I can’t wait to see the looks on the jury’s faces when they come in and see the necklace on me.

Ozzy (to Paula): I don’t think either of us can beat Cirie.

Paula: Well, she has a lot of friends on the jury. Tom’s voting for her, and at this point, I think Charlie and Danni would vote for her.

Ozzy: I wasn’t that close to either Charlie or Danni, but Cirie was.

Paula: I’m probably taking you, but I’m just as scared about that.

(confessional) Ozzy: I’ve spent the afternoon trying to convince Paula to bring me to the final vote. I think I can beat her pretty easily as long as I can get there.

Paula: I just don’t know if there’s any reason I should take Cirie instead.

Ozzy: Think about it, though. Cirie gets Jonathan’s vote for sure. She gets Tom’s vote, and she gets Terry’s vote. Throw in Charlie and Danni, and that’s the game right there.

Paula: Danni might vote for me. Then I have Yau-Man and Harriet sewn up, too.

Ozzy: Twila’s a toss-up. I’ll vote for you if you vote me out.

Paula: You’re not exactly helping your case.

Ozzy: What do you want me to say, Paula? Vote to keep me or I’ll make sure you lose? I don’t like to make threats.

(confessional) Paula: I think going against Cirie would be a close vote, but I can’t imagine beating Ozzy. He has Jonathan, Tom, Twila, and Terry wrapped up, and he probably gets Charlie and Danni both. All I have is Yau-Man and Harriet, and I can’t even count on Cirie. If I go against Ozzy, I can’t win.

Paula (to Cirie): Listen, I’m probably voting out Ozzy tonight.

Cirie: Well, that’s a relief.

Paula: I think we’re pretty even as far as the final vote goes.

Cirie: Good point. I probably get Tom, and he has a lot of friends on the jury.

(confessional) Paula: Nice going, Cirie. You just swayed my vote back to keeping Ozzy. I’d rather fight like hell against Ozzy than worry about all of Tom’s friends on the jury.

Paula: All I can count on for the final vote is Yau-Man and Harriet. Beyond that, I don’t have a friend in the world on the jury.

Cirie: I don’t know about that; if you go against me, you probably get Terry’s vote.

Paula: And I still lose by three.

Cirie: You’re pretty sure you won’t win.

Paula: I’m up against either you or Ozzy. You’re friends with everyone, and Ozzy’s the best competitor out here. Do I really stand a chance?

(confessional) Cirie: I don’t think Paula does stand a chance, really. I think she probably loses to me, and I think she loses to Ozzy. My job is to convince her she’ll beat me. I just hope I’ve done a good job of it.

Paula (to Ozzy, upset): Now I have to get ready to face Charlie and Danni.

Ozzy: Look, you have to face them sometime.

Paula: I know, but I was hoping it wouldn’t be with a million dollars on the line.

Ozzy: Look, would you rather go face them as a juror?

Paula: No…no, I don’t want that. It’s just hard.

(confessional) Paula: I know people have gone to the final vote before and faced jurors who have vendettas. It doesn’t make it any easier when I’m the one who has to do it.

The camera switches to a sunset and then to the three remaining Maui walking into the Tribal Council set. All three light their torches and take their seats; Paula, the immunity holder, sits behind Ozzy and Cirie.

Jeff: We will now bring in the jury. Jonathan, Harriet, Tom, Twila, Yau-Man, Terry, Charlie…and Danni, voted out at the last Tribal Council.

Danni is still wearing the same clothes she wore when she was voted out and looks as though she may have showered but has clearly not washed her hair or made herself up.

Jeff: Cirie, you were out of the challenge first. Were you just having trouble with the challenge, or were you fairly sure you were going through?

Cirie: You can’t ever be sure you’re going through. I’ve been trying to make sure that I’m in a good position to go through to the final vote all afternoon.

Jeff: What about you, Ozzy? You got a little fancy at the challenge. What changed?

Ozzy: I was trying to hang in the challenge for as long as I could by giving my feet a break and put the weight on my shoulders a bit.

Jeff: You’ve won nine immunity challenges in your Survivor career. Why change what works?

Ozzy: Paula looked awfully tough. She looked like she was made for that challenge.

Jeff: Paula, is that true?

Paula: I was having trouble with it, sure, but that doesn’t mean I was going to show it.

Jeff: You said your kids were a lot of help in preparing for the challenge. How so?

Paula: Well, kids leave things lying around all the time, and I’ve walked over my share of cluttered floors. My feet were in shape to handle those coals.

Jeff: So after not winning a single immunity challenge in Japan or out here, what drove you to want to win?

Paula: Well, part of it was that I was up against Ozzy, and I always wanted to beat him just to prove that I could do it. Part of it is how important this challenge is. It’s been a curse, though, because I’ve been racking my brain all day thinking about who I should take with me to the final vote.

Jeff: You said “who you should take with you to the final vote.”

Paula: Yes.

Jeff: I certainly didn’t say anything to give you the idea you were doing that.

Paula: Wait, what?

Jeff: All I told you was that you were going to the final two.

Paula: Well, if I’m not voting anyone out, who the hell is?

Jeff: There are eight people over there who will be casting their votes to send someone out of the game. For the first time, the jury will be active before the last day of the game. That having been said, Ozzy and Cirie will have a chance to make a statement for the jury before they vote. Paula, you can decide who goes first.

Paula: I’ll let Cirie go first.

Jeff: Cirie, go ahead.

Cirie: I played the game I was given, and I tried to help out wherever I could. For me, my first Survivor experience was a chance to get off the couch and actually play a game out in the elements. I felt out of place, but I learned a lot. I was ready this time, and I still feel like I learned an awful lot. I made some friendships that I will take with me for the rest of my life, and even if I don’t go any further, I’ve spent a long time out here on the islands, and I hope you will give me a chance to win your votes for a million dollars.

Jeff: Ozzy, your turn.

Ozzy: Like Cirie, I played the game I was given; it was a very different game. I worked as hard as I could around camp, and I used every tool I had to make our lives easier. I may have felt like I was next on the chopping block, but I made the best of my situation, and I have always been loyal to my alliance. I fought like hell to win every immunity challenge; it wasn’t because I thought I had to, but because I felt like I should. This is a game, and I gave it my all.

Jeff: The jury will now cast their votes. Jury, remember to write the name of the person you are voting out on your ballots. It is time to vote. Jonathan, you can go first.

Jonathan gets up to vote; he writes a name that is not seen.

After Jonathan, Tom gets up to vote. He does not make a speech; however; his vote, reading “Ozzy,” is seen.

Tom sits back down, and Charlie gets up to vote. His vote is not seen.

The next to vote after Charlie is Twila, whose vote is not seen.

After Twila, Harriet gets up to vote. Her vote is not shown.

After Harriet sits down, Yau-Man gets up to vote; his vote is not seen.

Yau-Man sits back down, and Terry gets up to vote; he does not give a speech, but his vote, reading “Cirie,” is shown.

The last person to vote is Danni; she votes, and it is not shown.

Danni goes and sits down, and the camera switches to Jeff.

Jeff: I’ll go tally the votes.

The camera focuses on Ozzy and Cirie, both tapping their feet nervously. Then it switches to a seemingly uninterested jury.

Finally, Jeff arrives back with the urn.

Jeff: Once the votes are read, the decision is final; the person voted out will be asked to leave the Tribal Council area immediately. I’ll read the votes.

Jeff takes out the first vote.

Jeff: First vote…Cirie.

Terry’s vote.

Jeff: …Cirie. Two votes Cirie.

It appears to be Yau-Man’s handwriting.

Jeff: …Ozzy.

Tom’s vote.

Jeff: …Ozzy. Two votes Ozzy, two votes Cirie.

It appears to be in Danni’s writing.

Jeff: …Cirie. Three votes Cirie.

It is unclear whose writing it is.

Jeff: …Cirie. Four votes Cirie, two votes Ozzy.

Again, it is unclear whose writing it is.

Jeff: …Ozzy. Three votes Ozzy, four votes Cirie, one vote left. If it’s for Ozzy, we will go to a tiebreak.

It looks like Harriet’s handwriting.

The camera zooms out, showing the entire set.

It focuses back in on Jeff, holding up the last vote.

Jeff: …the seventeenth person voted out of Survivor: All-Stars II and the ninth member of the jury…Cirie. That’s five votes; that’s enough. You need to bring me your torch.

Cirie takes her torch and places it in the holder.

Jeff: Cirie, the tribe has spoken.

Jeff snuffs Cirie’s torch.

Cirie: Congratulations, guys. Have fun.

Ozzy: We will.

Cirie walks off.

Jeff: There are nine members of the jury and two of you. Tomorrow, there will not be a challenge, but the last and most important Tribal Council will take place. That jury will decide which one of you will win a million dollars and the title of Sole Survivor. You have all day tomorrow to think about how you will convince them to award that prize to you. Grab your torches; head back to camp. Goodnight.

The final two file out of Tribal Council with their torches lit; Paula is walking ahead of Ozzy.

Cirie (final words): I wasn’t expecting the jury to cast the votes like that, but even so, I’ve had a lot of fun in this game. I wish I was still in the game, but I’m happy with how I did. I hope my kids will be proud of me when I get back home.

5 votes Charlie, Cirie: Jonathan, Terry, Twila, Yau-Man
3 votes Ozzy: Danni, Harriet, Tom

The screen cuts to commercial.

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08-28-07, 03:07 PM (EST)
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6. "Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 - "This Is a Game for a Million Dollars, Not a Daytime Soap Opera""
Manhattan Island, 12:14 pm. Escaped inmate Dena Goodman, down to one bullet in her gun, has set off a bomb that is to explode in 15 minutes.

Sergeant (over the loudspeaker): Everyone in the area, back away! You have less than 15 minutes to get to a safe distance!

Dena: Don’t even think about saying it one more time unless you want me to set off the bomb now.

Sergeant: We’re coming in after you! We have to diffuse the bomb!

Dena: Do it and die.

Charlie: All right, look. As much as it pains me to do this, if it saves lives, I will go down to the courthouse, and I will marry you.

Dena: I don’t believe that. What’s to stop you from turning around and just annulling the marriage the same day?

Charlie: Here, hand me the marriage license. I’ll show you just how serious I am.

Dena hands Charlie the envelope, and he opens up the marriage license. He appears to sign the document.

The time on the bomb now reads 12:08.

Charlie hands the document back to Dena.

Dena: Yes, that satisfies me. Now we need some witnesses. Where should I start? Oh, right, of course. I’ll go here to Charlie’s best man. Derek, sign as a witness and I’ll let your dad live.

Derek: Or better yet, how about I don’t sign it and you turn around and go back home?

Dena: We’re going home, all right. We’re going home as a family. As a family with a mom and a dad who are married.

Derek: What about George?

Dena: I never loved that man. He was a poor substitute for your father.

Derek: What about your son? Maybe he isn’t George’s son, but I know he’s yours. What about him? What happens to him?

Dena: I don’t know. Really, I don’t even care. I never liked that boy. God only knows why I let George talk me into having another baby.

Derek: Maybe you just like to abandon your kids. Sure, that’s how it always goes. Have a kid, don’t pay any attention to him, leave when the kid’s about ten years old, watch the kid grow up jaded, and blame the father for it. That’s rich. It really is.

Charlie: Just sign the damn paper, Derek.

Derek: I’d rather be shot right now.

Dena: I can arrange that, you know.

Derek: OK, fine. If you really want, I’ll sign the damn paper. But first, I want all the other signatures on here. Is there anyone here who’s even licensed to perform weddings? It’s a matter of life and death.

Dena: Literally.

Derek: Shut up.

A man who appears to be in his seventies comes forward wearing a crucifix.

Dena: Who the hell are you?

Elderly man: My mane’s Father MacDougle, and I’ll sign your marriage license.

Derek: Damnit, I didn’t think there was actually someone here who would do that.

MacDougle: It might get me in a bit of trouble with the Church, but if it keeps this man from being murdered, I’ll do it.

Dena: Oh, come on. Can’t we get an actual Christian here instead of one of these kid-touching Catholics?

Derek: All right, take that back now or you can find another witness. To hell with saving a life.

Dena: I’ll take whatever life is the most painful to you.

At this time, the timer reads 4:18.

Dena: Last chance is coming soon, asshole.

Charlie: Look, I already said I’d marry you. What the hell more do you want?

Dena: I said I want witnesses. If we don’t get witnesses, everyone here dies anyway. I’m either coming out of this married or dead.

Derek: Can you just come out of it dead and the rest of us can come out sane?

A tall, bald African-American man emerges from the crowd of bystanders.

Bystander: I’ll sign that license.

Dena: Thank you. Here goes.

The man takes the form and signs as a witness, handing the license back to Dena.

Derek: What the hell did you do that for?

Bystander: I always wanted to be someone’s maid of honor.

The bystander and another tall, athletic man appearing to be of Hispanic origin walk off hand-in-hand.

Dena: Look at what you’ve made me do for this. I had to ask that disgusting man to sign this.

Derek: What the hell did that guy ever do to you?

Dena: His lifestyle is immoral and his race is offensive to me. That’s what he did to me. My only regret is that the bomb won’t be taking him out as well.

The bomb timer is down to 1:17.

Dena takes the gun, down to a single bullet, and points it at Derek’s head.

Dena: Well, go on. Sign the form if you value your life so much.

The timer ticks to 1:10. Derek looks over at the bomb for a minute and sees it ticking to below a minute.

Derek writes something on the form vigorously and stuffs it in the envelope with the pen.

He hands the form back to his mother as the timer ticks to 0:45.

Dena: There, it’s official. We’re married, and that’s that. I win; now let’s end this silly hostage situation.

Derek: Not so fast, crazy bitch. Open up that license.

Dena takes it out to reveal the signatures. Derek has clearly not signed the form; in fact, he wrote the phrase “GO TO HELL” in bold letters across the license.

Derek: I guess the marriage is void now.

Dena: You bastard! You stole my one chance to be happy!

As the timer ticks to 0:15, Dena takes off through a narrow path between officers, evading gunfire and traffic and reaching the center of the avenue.

The timer ticks to 0:05. Then it ticks to 0:04. Dena is far away from the explosion and may not be affected by it. At this point, I am far enough away that I cannot be harmed; I am watching this take place from the window of a local restaurant several stories off the ground.

Back from commercial.

Angakauitai Island, Maui camp, Day 39. Ozzy and Paula are the only two Survivors remaining. The two wake up to see a delivery made to their beach.

They go over together to get what’s waiting for them; they have a basket containing food, wine, and other drinks. There is also a note attached to the basket.

Paula: Oh my God, we got food!

Ozzy: I hadn’t planned on fishing today, so this is nice.

Paula: I’m not doing much of anything today.

Ozzy: For once, neither am I.

Paula: We earned it.

(confessional) Ozzy: We got a basket full of food to eat; I think there was fresh fruit, beef jerky, a loaf of good bread, and a bottle of wine that I’ll get all to myself. Thankfully for Paula, they packed some other drinks as well.

Paula: I hope you don’t mind if I drink down this sparkling water here.

Ozzy: Enjoy it.

Paula: Believe me, I will.

(confessional) Paula: Ozzy can enjoy that wine all he wants; they were nice enough to give me some other stuff to drink. It beats the hell out of boiling water and drinking it warm and full of dirt.

Paula: So I wonder what the note says.

Ozzy: I don’t know; it probably just tells us we’re the final two.

Paula: Do you see anyone else around?

Ozzy: Nope.

Paula: Then it looks like we’re the final two.

Ozzy lifts up his bottle of wine.

Ozzy: Cheers.

Paula: Cheers.

Ozzy taps his wine bottle against Paula’s sparkling water bottle and the two take a sip.

(confessional) Ozzy: Paula and I just enjoyed the morning. We both knew our fates were in the jury’s hands, and we might as well enjoy the rest of the time we had out here.

Paula (from the note): Congratulations on making it to the end of the game.

Ozzy: Did I tell you that’s what the note said or what?

Paula: Wait, there’s more. (from the note) Take everything at camp down and light it ablaze as a tribute to those who played the game with you.

Ozzy: This part’s always fun.

Paula: Hey, I got the first fire of the season, and it looks like I’ll be here for the last.

(confessional) Paula: OK, so the other tribe got the first fire of the season, but I got the first fire for my tribe along with Yau-Man. I thought back to that immunity idol I found on day six. It saved me once, it got us a fire, and it got me enough time to get in with my tribe so I could go all the way.

Ozzy and Paula gather up some bamboo after breaking down the shelter and piling it up around the fire pit.

Ozzy: Do you want to light the fire or should I?

Paula: Hell, we came this far together. Let’s go out together.

Ozzy: It’s too bad we can’t win together.

Paula: One of us will win, and no matter who it is, I’m happy with how far I came.

Ozzy: So you don’t mind if I win.

Paula: I mind if you win and I don’t fight like hell to win. I want to make sure that whichever one of us wins the game wins because we earn it.

Ozzy: I want the same thing. I don’t want to see you get hurt tonight.

Paula: I’ll be fine. There’s nothing any of those jurors can say that can hurt me. They’ll regret it when they get home if they try.

(confessional) Ozzy: I worry a little about Paula going into tonight’s vote. She has to face Charlie and Danni, and really, I don’t even want to face them. That whole episode with them was just too ugly to want to have to worry about. I have too much respect for Paula to try to beat her just because of that. I want to win, but I want to win against Paula when she’s at her best.

The camera shows the burned-down camp, and then it pans to Ozzy and Paula, who are embracing near the water’s edge, looking ready to get in their canoe one last time.

Paula (to Ozzy): Thanks for always being there.

Ozzy: I’ll do anything I can for you.

The two Survivors climb in their canoe and begin paddling for the final Tribal Council. The sky is not as bright as it was earlier, and the sun appears to be ready to set soon.

The camera shows an overview of the two in an open ocean with the island to their left.

Paula (voice-over): This has been the most challenging experience of my life. I’ve had a lot of trials and difficulties in my years on Earth, but I always found myself able to pick up and dust myself off. It wasn’t always so easy this time. The fact that I made it as far as I did is miraculous.

Ozzy (voice-over): I’ve been this far once before. I always go in thinking that all I have to do is show everyone how I played and what I did to reach the end, and I will win. My competition the first time was very good, and my competition this time is every bit as good. Tonight could go either way.

The camera shows the two of them continuing to row and the sun starting to set.

Yau-Man (voice-over): I’ve thought long and hard about my decision from back when there were still six people in the game, but I stopped thinking yesterday and made up my mind.

Harriet (voice-over): I’ve been to the end and almost made the final vote before. I lost under pressure, and I want to see how the two of them do under pressure.

Cirie (voice-over): I haven’t had a lot of time to think about my decision or even what to ask, so my vote is almost entirely riding on what they do tonight.

The sun is very obviously setting; the sky has turned a bold red-orange as the two Survivors continue to row around Angakauitai Island.

Charlie (voice-over): My decision comes down to trust, and it comes down to how well one Survivor does in being trustworthy.

Twila (voice-over): I was on a tribe with both Ozzy and Paula, but I never really felt like I fit in with either of them. I want to see them sweat.

Tom (voice-over): Deciding between awarding Ozzy or Paula the money is like deciding if I want a Cadillac or a Jaguar. They’re both good decisions; it’s hard to decide which one’s better.

The sky is in twilight; the sun is still visible, but the daylight is vanishing. Ozzy and Paula are rowing closer to Tribal Council.

Terry (voice-over): The idea of playing the game cleanly or with integrity means nothing to me anymore. I intend to do very little congratulating tonight.

Danni (voice-over): Facing the final two is as hard for me as facing us is for them. I’ve done some pretty bad things in this game, and it’s hard to be seen as a legitimate juror.

Jonathan (voice-over): I sat across from Ozzy in the Cook Islands, and he did not get my vote. He will have to earn it this time.

Ozzy and Paula pull up to the dock outside the Tribal Council set. It is now dark outside; their way is guided by torches. They carry their unlit torches in, light them, and sit down, with Ozzy on the camera’s right.

Jeff: We will now bring in the jury. Jonathan, Harriet, Tom, Twila, Yau-Man, Terry, Charlie, Danni…and Cirie, voted out at the last Tribal Council.

Cirie has on a very shiny, formal black dress; she has cut her hair and cleaned it up.

Jeff: Here’s how tonight’s Tribal Council will work. I will give the Survivors a chance to make an opening statement. Then, one by one, the jury will address the Survivors. They can ask a question to one or both Survivors, or they can make a statement. Once all nine Survivors are finished, the Survivors will have the chance to make a short closing statement. The jury will then vote for the person they want to see win, and the one with the most votes wins the game. Ozzy, go ahead.

Ozzy: I said a lot of this last night, and I think it bears repeating. I came out here to come as far as I could, and I made sure that my tribe was fed and taken care of. I don’t particularly like conflict, and I tried to be as peaceful in this game as I could. I came here on business, and I came here to avoid the same mistakes I made the last time. I hope you take into consideration the hard work I did and the food that I caught as well as the challenges that I won when you make your decision.

Jeff: Paula, your turn.

Paula: Like Cirie, I played a very different game from Ozzy. I felt like I was in a tough situation right off the bat, but I made sure I was safe whenever I felt in danger. I kept my alliance very close, and I tried my best not to make any enemies. One of my plans was to come in here in a hidden alliance with Charlie and Danni; I thought, to be honest, that I would be sitting next to Charlie at this point. I adapted my game when I felt like that wasn’t possible. I’ve adapted several times, and that’s why I stuck around.

Jeff: Thanks, Paula.

Images of Ozzy and Paula with their torches in the background as well as a very intense-looking jury dominate the screen as it cuts to commercial.

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Colonel Zoidberg 3370 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"

08-28-07, 03:14 PM (EST)
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7. "Survivor: All-Stars II Episode 15 - "This Is a Game for a Million Dollars, Not a Daytime Soap Opera""
Manhattan Island, 12:29 pm. Escaped inmate Dena Goodman has just fled a hostage scene on foot wearing only a bra and panties; she has set off a bomb that is set to go off in fifteen seconds.

As Dena escapes the police blockade untouched, a team of bomb experts comes in and attempts to diffuse the bomb. Everyone else begins to flee the scene, but due to the crowding, it is difficult to escape.

Dena (shouting from a distance): You’re all dead, you hear me?

Derek (to his father): Listen, Dad, I’m sorry about all this, and I’m sorry for all the stuff I said in my latest blog. If we don’t survive, I want Paula to know she’s always been like a mom to me.

The bomb ticks to 0:05. Charlie and Derek are behind the police and paramedics, who have fled the scene; they have fallen over each other, and Charlie appears hurt.

Derek takes his father and lifts him, trying to carry him away from the scene. Dena is running away from the crowd of people trying to flee the bomb.

The bomb ticks to 0:02.

Derek, carrying Charlie but still within sight of the bomb, looks to the next block, where Danni is sitting on the park bench with her face in her hands. She appears to be crying.

Charlie: Hey look, there’s Danni, She’s miserable.

Derek: Good. She deserves to be.

Civilians are screaming as bomb technicians are puzzled by the bomb.

Finally, it ticks to 0:00.

A loud sound of a bomb exploding is heard, and everyone within two city blocks ducks for their safety.

A large cloud of smoke fills the area immediately surrounding the bomb as the technicians duck and cover, resigned to a fiery death.

Derek and Charlie do not turn around; instead, they continue to flee the scene.

The deafening screams return after the boom dies down; the smoke clears unusually quickly.

Several police officers return to the scene with paramedics in an attempt to rescue the bomb technicians.

Dena looks on at the scene in utter confusion, having no idea what just happened.

Then, the bomb appears to play sound.

A man laughs maniacally on the bomb’s recorded audio.

As the laughter dies down, the man speaks.

The first word spoken is “GOTCHA!”

Upon closer inspection, the smoke was actually standard machine fog, the explosion sound was faked, and the bomb never actually detonated.

The timer does not read 0:00 as expected, but rather, “SURPRISE!”

Sergeant: That stupid bitch stole a novelty bomb?

Officer: We stood here fearing for our lives because some nut job swiped a fake bomb and held us up for it?

The bomb technicians get up from their ducked position completely unharmed. Some officers in the area are actually laughing.

Bomb tech: Wait, so this bomb wasn’t real? Let me get a closer look.

The bomb tech inspects the bomb closely and decides to cut one of the wires.

When he cuts the red wire, the lid pops off.

Another loud explosion is heard, and civilians and officers alike scream and run for cover.

The bomb cover smacks the bomb tech in the face.

It’s followed by a series of novelty snakes.

Sergeant: Son of a bitch! Who makes this crap, anyway?

Officer: What I want to know is who steals this.

Sergeant: I think we have our answer.

The sergeant points to Dena, who has taken an 8-year-old girl as a hostage at gunpoint. She has come closer to the intersection where the hostage situation began.

Dena (shouting): Bring back my husband and son or the girl dies!

Sergeant (into a megaphone): We are prepared to take you down! Surrender with your hands up!

Dena: No way in hell! Not this time! I’m killing someone here!

Dena cocks her gun as the girl freezes in terror.

Sergeant (not into his megaphone): Can anyone get a clean shot?

Officer: All the snipers fled from the bomb.

Sergeant: Well, who do we have?

Officer: I don’t know.

Sergeant: I’m not letting this girl die on my watch at the hands of a deranged psychopath!

Officer: Well, we might not have any other choice.

Sergeant: That’s not an option! Go get those two guys and bring them back here! We have a situation again!

The officer looks over to see Charlie and Derek about one-and-a-half blocks away, having returned to the scene wondering what is going on. The officer motions them over, and they come quickly.

Officer (to Charlie): Look, your ex-wife lost it again, and none of your snipers are here. We need you.

Charlie: Damnit, I hate when this happens.

Officer: I took the marriage license she had and whited out what Derek wrote. It should still be valid.

Charlie: Hell, I’d rather she shot me than that little kid.

Charlie stands out in the street.

Charlie (shouting): Hey, come pick on someone your own size!

Dena (shouting back): If anyone comes closer than you without the marriage license signed by my boy, the girl dies!

Charlie: Now come on. Do you really think I want to marry a crazed killer? I like being alive, thanks.

Dena: That’s not what you said in the Navy! You went to Grenada and almost got yourself killed, and for what? I could have been a widow, Charlie! I sat and worried myself sick every night! I couldn’t be alone! Can you imagine if I had to deal with you overseas now? That was my life! I came back because you’re not that person anymore! I want the man who doesn’t risk his life for nothing!

Charlie: What do you call this?

Dena: Shut up! I’m talking! One more word out of you and the girl gets it!

I look to the other side of the street, where the girl’s mother and father are watching in horror. The father appears to be ready to attack Dena, but he has no means to do so.

Dena: Are you willing to let some innocent girl die just because some reality-show asshole won’t honor his marriage vows?

Charlie: You broke those vows, damnit! I didn’t do a damn thing!

Dena (furious): All right, that’s it. Now it’s on. Now the girl dies.

Dena angles her gun to the girl’s temple.

She positions her finger to get off a shot.

She is visibly shaking, but her positioning of the gun is perfect to kill the girl.

She clenches her trigger finger as Charlie and the girl’s parents can only watch.

The girl’s expression turns to sadness as she begins to cry.

The rooftops appear not to have any snipers, though there are a few bystanders. None with guns.

Dena pulls the trigger.

At the same time, she drops to her knees.

She soon falls over onto her stomach with the now-empty gun pointed away from her.

Police officers rush to the scene and to the girl.

Some rush to handcuff Dena while a group of paramedics rushes to the girl’s aid.

It is clear instantly that the shot went wild and did not touch the girl. She is saddened, mortified, and in tears, but she is physically unharmed.

Soon, her parents come and pick her up.

The officers handcuffing Dena notice that she has not responded.

Officer: Wait, what the hell?

Upon closer inspection, there is a bullet wound in the side of Dena’s head that is now beginning to pour blood. Upon even closer inspection, she has no vital signs and was killed on contact.

Officer: Who the hell did this? Our snipers aren’t here—

A man dressed in military camouflage and a ski mask walks up with a sniper rifle in his holster. He is not clearly able to be identified, but he speaks to the officer on the scene.

Masked man: Did I kill her?

Officer: Yes, sir; you did. Wait, you took her down?

Masked man: Just doing my civic duty, Officer. I got here just in time, it looks like. There’s nothing like taking down a crazy woman after a long drive from South Carolina.

Officer: Wait, South Carolina?

Masked man: Yeah, some lady told me I’d be needed.

The man takes off his mask.

Charlie: Wait, George? George Goodman? The masked man was you?

George: Captain? You’re here?

Charlie: Hell, I’m no captain anymore; I’m just Charlie now.

George: Why the hell was she after you? I don’t get it.

Charlie: She went off the deep end and tried to make me marry her at gunpoint.

George: So who was the girl?

Charlie: No idea. I think she was just a random hostage. How did you find us?

George: I got a few text messages and an e-mail from some lady…what was her name…Boatwright something.

Charlie: Wait, Boatwright? As in Danni?

George: Yeah, I knew she had a guy’s name.

Charlie: So you came here and saved our lives because Danni from Survivor brought you here?

George: Yeah, she’s the real hero. I’m just along for the ride.

Charlie: Well, how about that.

George: Oh yeah, and one more thing. This one’s for you, Derek.

Derek appears only mildly interested.

George: She told me to give you this. And let me tell you about that girl. Damn, I could look at her all day.

Charlie: Well, Derek said the same thing until—

Derek: Dad!

Charlie immediately stops speaking.

Derek: Shut the hell up. And thanks, but I don’t have anything to say to her. I don’t buy it for a minute that she saved our lives. Not after what she did to us. George, you’re a real hero, and I hope you get a medal for this, but Danni doesn’t deserve a damn thing.

George: Well, I sure am sorry to hear that, but I have something else for you. It’s from another nice lady…I think she said her name was…Pauline? Paulette?

Charlie: You must mean Paula from the show.

Derek: OK, OK. She might have something to say that I could want to hear.

The card has a flap on it that has a message inside.

Upon closer reading, it says “Meet us at the address on the back. Come soon, Love, Paula and the kids.”

Charlie: Look, son, I know you have a lot of anger with her.

Derek reads the note again and sees the message, “P.S. Sorry I trashed you and your dad on the show. Love you both.”

Derek grabs the note and has an unusual expression on his face.

George: Derek? Are you crying?

Derek (possibly crying): No. No, of course not. It’s this damn air here.

Charlie: All right. George, we have someplace to be very soon, and I would be honored if you joined us.

George: Oh, what the hell. It’s not like I have anywhere else I have to be. My boy’s with my parents, and I’ll be back tomorrow.

The three men leave the scene and pick up where Charlie had left off, heading into a shoe store. I take one last look down the street and see Danni sadly walking back to her hotel.

Back from commercial.

Angakauitai Island, Final Tribal Council, Night 39. Ozzy and Paula, the final two, are facing the jury, which is prepared to address them.

Jeff: The jury will now get a chance to address the final two Survivors. Jurors, you can ask a question of each Survivor; it can be the same question or different questions for each Survivor. You can ask a question of only one Survivor, or you can simply make a statement. Danni, I’ll let you go first.

Danni gets up to address Ozzy and Paula. She is looking more cleaned-up than previously, having put on a nice blue-green blouse and a pair of black pants.

Danni: First, I want to congratulate both of you on getting this far. You both deserve to be up there, and the decision tonight is a tough one. Ozzy, I’ll start with you. What have you learned from your last experience on the show?

Ozzy: I’ve learned that you have to be the best and you have to make sure you’re the best. I’ve also learned that I have to be prepared for anything. I lost last time because I wasn’t prepared for a twist at the end, and I wasn’t the best. This time, I was prepared, and I think I secured my position here in the final two.

Danni: Thanks, Ozzy. Paula, first of all, I’m ready to come clean about the night on the yacht. I lied about my night with Charlie, and for that, I do apologize. I misjudged by position in the game, and I panicked. I was merely trying to get ahead after my last chance to win was gone, and—

Paula (clearly agitated): I’ve heard just about enough out of your little bitch mouth, Danni. I’ve heard every excuse for why the hell you think you have the right to tear me and Charlie apart, and I still can’t stand to listen to it. What the hell makes you think it’s f---ing all right to tell me that you slept with my guy on that God damn yacht? (screaming) I said a lot of things to him three nights ago! I said a lot of things out of hurt that didn’t need to be said, and it’s all because you can’t be bothered to tell the truth, Danni! We had a deal! I held up my end, and so did Charlie! Thanks to you, we have a long road ahead!

Danni (tearing up): I-I’m sorry, I just—

Paula (shouting viciously, angrier with every sentence): You’re sorry? You’re f---ing sorry? F--- you! F--- you dead! You not only tore me apart from Charlie, you tore my kids apart from their only chance at having a dad! And you took a guy who did nothing wrong but like you, and maybe even love you, and destroyed the only thing he ever wanted in life, and that was to have a mom who wasn’t a f------ assh---! You did far worse than destroy two people here, Danni! I will never forgive you and never forget what you did, and I’ll be damned if I’m ever speaking to you again! I know for a fact I’m not the only one that feels that way!

Danni has dropped to her knees and covered her face; she is crying heavily.

Paula (mercilessly): You tore me apart from the man I love for a chance you didn’t even have at a stack of money you could never hope to win! You destroyed two people’s lives for nothing! For what? Your own sick amusement? You’re a sick, sick f---! Do you enjoy seeing other people here suffer? Is that why you came back? So you could ruin people’s lives? I bet you do enjoy that! I bet you sat back after you got voted off and told yourself that at least no one else is happy!

Danni is keeled over, with her back in the air, her face covered, and crying heavily. She is unable to form words.

Paula (continuing to scream): I hope you’re happy, you miserable bitch! Don’t f------ vote for me! I wouldn’t accept it if you did, you two-faced piece of human—

Jeff (interjecting): That’s enough, Paula.

Paula (still angry): I’m not done with her, Jeff!

Jeff: You’re done now. Danni, you can take your seat.

Danni slowly gets up and continues crying at her seat. No juror even looks at her.

Jeff: Please keep your emotions under control. That goes for everyone. Yau-Man, you’re next.

Yau-Man stands up and faces the jury. Paula is slowly composing herself.

Yau-Man appears a little more cleaned up; he’s still clean-shaven, but he’s dressed in an orange shirt and a pair of jeans that seem to be too big for him.

Yau-Man: I really hope I haven’t done anything to you guys. I’ll make it short and sweet; I know this is a tough night for both of you. I’ve done this twice now in about a year. I’m very proud of how far I’ve come. I’m 55 years old, and I still have what it takes to play this game. But enough about me. Ozzy, you’re a young, strong leader, and you’ve been to the end before. Was that a handicap coming into this game?

Ozzy: It was, a little bit. My tribe saw me and knew who I was and what I was about, and I think they liked the idea that they had a provider, but they weren’t sure how to handle me as a player. I felt like I had to let other people make strategic decisions for a while because I didn’t want to be considered too strong and make it worth people while to get rid of me early.

Yau-Man: Thank you. Paula, how did your tribe really factor into your plans? I know you had an alliance with Charlie and Danni, and I have to believe you would honor that. What was your real plan for your tribemates?

Paula: Honestly, Yau-Man, I had you and Ozzy in it to the final five, and I wanted you guys to think I was with you up to that point. But I knew all along I couldn’t go to the end with you guys.

Yau-Man: Is there any reason you believed that?

Paula: Simply put, Yau-Man, if I went to the final vote with you, I would not win. I wouldn’t even come close.

Yau-Man: Thanks, Paula.

Jeff: Thanks, Yau-Man.

Yau-Man goes back and sits down. Paula seems to be less upset.

Jeff: Tom, come on up.

Tom comes up from the back. His hair is completely gray and at its normal length; he has on an NYPD shirt.

Tom: I didn’t imagine at the start of the game that I’d be over here facing you guys, or even that I’d be here at all. I’ve had the opportunity of a lifetime to play this game a second time; I hope it’s a chance that you guys have enjoyed as much as I have. My question for you guys is a simple one. What have you done to make the most of your opportunity out here? Paula, I’ll start with you.

Paula: I’ve taken steps to make sure that my stay in this game gets longer every day. I’ve always tried to stay one step ahead of everyone. I made an alliance with Yau-Man on the first day, and I used that to my advantage in every way I could.

Tom: Ozzy, go ahead.

Ozzy: I didn’t see myself going too far coming in here. I thought I would settle into a quiet role as the guy who performed in challenges and caught fish. Circumstances came up where I felt like I had to lead, and that’s exactly what I did. I turned a frustrated tribe into a winner back on day nine, and it got me halfway through the game. I carried myself the rest of the way.

Tom: Thanks for that answer, Ozzy.

Jeff: Thanks, Tom.

Tom takes his seat.

Jeff: Twila, it’s your turn.

Twila stands up before the jury; she’s wearing overalls with a navy shirt, and she has her trademark straw hat on.

Twila: Well, if you’re listening to this message, it looks like I’m on the jury. That means I can say whatever the hell I want to you guys, and there isn’t a damn thing you can do about it. Right, Paula?

Paula: Yeah, I guess.

Twila: Really. So tell me now, Paula. That little plan I keep hearing about where you act like you’re not aligned with Charlie and Danni. I have to ask, did you really think that was a good Survivor move?

Paula: Yes, actually I did. I thought I could get far into the game again, and once the time came, our little plan would go into action.

Twila: You do understand that you were almost voted out twice before that, and if you get voted out, your plan completely screws Charlie and Danni.

Paula: I took a risk, sure, but when do you get ahead in this game and not take risks?

Twila: There’s risky and there’s reckless. You were reckless, Paula.

Paula: I didn’t think I had much choice. The only way to get to the end alongside Charlie was not to be a couple.

Twila: So this was about Charlie, was it?

Paula: It was about both of us reaching the end.

Twila: Why not just play your own game and not worry about it?

Paula: Of course I wanted to get him to the end! That was my plan at the time, and why the hell should I change it?

Twila: Clearly there’s no way you’re going to satisfy me. I’ll move on to Ozzy. Ozzy, you can tell me you didn’t need immunity all that badly. Let me tell you something. If you don’t go winning immunity, you’re gone and you know it. You’re here on one trick alone. Tell me if I’m wrong.

Ozzy: My tribemates had plenty of opportunities to vote me out.

Twila: Get serious, Ozzy. You got lucky so many times, and you got especially lucky that I fell asleep on that immunity advantage.

Ozzy: I used that late in the game, and I was safe.

Twila: Come on. We all know that your tribe was ready to turn against you the first chance we got, but we never got the chance. If Maria doesn’t break her leg, you might not even be here.

Ozzy: I would have won that challenge.

Twila: Get serious, Ozzy. You got lucky. That’s all I want you to admit.

Ozzy: I couldn’t have gotten this far without luck.

Twila: Of course! So why should you get the money if you relied on luck?

Ozzy: I didn’t rely on it; I just got it!

Twila: Right. OK. Sure, whatever. I’m done.

Jeff: Thanks, Twila.

Twila goes back to sit down.

Jeff: Jonathan, come on up.

Jonathan comes forward; he has on a blue button-down and jeans and has combed his hair back.

Jonathan: Well, guys, I’m down here, and once again, Ozzy’s over there. Ozzy, in the Cook Islands, I remember that I said you seemed a bit arrogant. I want to know if you feel like you did anything to correct that or if it really wasn’t a concern of yours.

Ozzy: To be honest, Jonathan, there were lots of other things on my mind this time. I never imagined I would make it this far, and my concerns in the beginning were having a well-fed and winning tribe. That took up a lot of my time early in the game.

Jonathan: I guess that’s fair. Paula, this is your first time facing the jury. It seems to me you were very dependent on other people for your survival in this game. You credit Yau-Man, Charlie, and Danni for your survival. What did you do to get yourself this far?

Paula: Jonathan, the game of Survivor is one where you have to depend on other people. I know you depended on other people when you tried to get me out on day six.

Jonathan: Just to be clear, I couldn’t care less if you were out. I wanted your idol out, not you.

Paula: In any case, you were counting on a lot of help to get that accomplished. You don’t get to vote people out unilaterally in this game; you have to count on other people. I used that to get ahead, as did everyone here.

Jonathan: OK, I guess that’s fair.

Jeff: Thanks, Jonathan.

Jonathan takes his seat again.

Jeff: Harriet, it’s your turn.

Harriet hobbles down; she has on a knee-length skirt that shows the scarring and discoloration on her knee.

Jeff: If I can make a suggestion for everyone here, I suggest not cutting your knee open with a machete. I’m still not over that one. In any case, I’ve never really been good at this sort of thing, so I’ll just ask you guys a simple question. We all know why you believe you deserve to win. I’d like you to tell me why your opponent shouldn’t win. Keep in mind, this is for a million dollars; you can tell me anything, even if it’s not related to the game. Paula, I’ll start with you.

Paula: Ozzy wasn’t really in on any major plans and scooted by simply by winning immunity. I feel that his game was very one-dimensional, and his social game left a little to be desired. If Ozzy were playing the game again and I were coaching him, that’s what I would ask him to improve.

Harriet: Ozzy, same question, Why shouldn’t Paula win?

Ozzy: Paula wasn’t very physically strong and didn’t seem to do too well in challenges up until the end. Also, her game was based on deception and not on a good diplomatic effort.

Harriet; Thanks, guys.

Jeff: Thanks, Harriet.

Harriet hobbles back to her seat; Yau-Man and Jonathan help her up.

Jeff: Terry, we’ll go to you.

Terry stands before the jury; he’s cleaned up his appearance greatly and has on a white button-down shirt and tie.

Terry: I look at the games you two played, and all I can see is all the mistakes you made. First off, you were a losing tribe until we self-destructed in the Attack Zone challenge. If we stay focused, we go out there and win, and soon, we have such an advantage on you guys that there’s just no hope for you. That’s the first thing wrong with your game. The second thing wrong with your game is everything I’ve heard that happened with the second vote.

Ozzy and Paula sit with a stunned expression on their faces.

Terry: Don’t look at me like you don’t know what I’m talking about. I was on a tribe with Yau-Man, and he told me everything. Paula, you really should have been gone second. You didn’t even have the good sense to use your immunity idol. Granted, it might have paid off later, but you put yourself in danger and took a huge gamble. That was a gamble that I can’t see how it even paid off.

Paula appears confused and defeated.

Terry: And then I find out that another Survivor made a grave mistake that kept Paula in the game. Ozzy, I can’t believe you actually thought that voting out your number one ally was a good game move in any way. Yes, I realize that you’re here, but I’ve seen how you play the game early on. It’s as if you don’t develop any sense until about day ten. You did it on your season when you threw that challenge. You did it again voting off Ami. A move like that should have led to the self-destruction of the tribe, and frankly, if not for our own self-destruction, we would have walked all over you, and the final two would probably include the one man who deserves to be up there over either one of you. That man is the one man that you seemed to just toss out like he was nothing.

Paula has her head in her hands; Ozzy’s jaw is hanging open.

Terry: Paula, you cut Charlie aside for something he didn’t do. If it were a game move, I would understand, but you believed the word of someone who couldn’t keep her story straight over the man you claim to love? If I were Charlie, I would get the hell out now because any life he might have with you will just be filled with mistrust and tension. You’re constantly going to accuse him of things he didn’t do, and soon, he’ll get sick of it and leave. I don’t treat my wife with that kind of disrespect, and I know she doesn’t treat me like that.

Ozzy seems to be a bit relieved as Paula begins to cry.

Terry: And Ozzy, don’t think I’m letting you off easy. I know exactly what went through your mind. The girls want Charlie gone, and you decide it’s convenient to send him home despite the fact that you know Danni was lying. Then, when it’s convenient for you, you turn Danni into Public Enemy Number One. The fact that Paula beat you in that challenge was poetic justice; you didn’t deserve to win. And neither of you self-righteous hypocrites deserves to win. Right now, I have to pick between one of you, and I absolutely hate it. I’d rather write down Saddam Hussein’s name on that parchment than either of yours; that’s how disgusted I am with you both. When you decide to set a better example for those around you, and Paula, you should know better if you’re the loving single mother you claim to be, then maybe I’ll figure out who I can award a million dollars to. As for now, to be honest, both of you can go to hell.

Terry turns around disgusted.

Jeff: Thanks, Terry.

Terry takes his seat and glares at both Ozzy and Paula.

Jeff: Cirie, you’re up.

Cirie comes up from the front row and stands before the jury; her formal black dress reaches her ankles.

Cirie: Before I make my statement, I’d just like to reiterate something said on the first All-Stars season. People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones. Those on the jury know who they are.

Cirie stares daggers at Terry, who appears defiant.

Cirie: There’s been a lot said tonight, and I think it’s time we tried to undo a lot of the anger and hurt that’s permeated this whole gathering. I came out here thirty-nine days ago to win some money and maybe forge a few new friendships in the process. I came out here to have fun and to learn a lot about myself. Coming here for any other reason just gets in the way of becoming a better person. I’d like to hear about how your experience has made you a better person. Paula, I’ll go to you.

Paula: I hate to say it, Cirie, but I really don’t know if I’ve become a better person yet. The one thing I can say about this is that I’ve learned a lot about myself, and I know there’s a lot of changing I have to do. I understand now how long and hard the road is to improving yourself, and one little episode in my first season is not a cure-all. I still find myself getting too upset too easily, and I still judge people too quickly. That’s something I have to take with me and work on after the game is over.

Cirie: Ozzy?

Ozzy: Wow. It’s hard to top that. But I can say that this experience has changed me. My first time out, I followed. The one time I tried to lead, I immediately regretted it, so I followed. This time, I had to learn to lead, and I rose to the circumstances. I don’t know if that makes me a better person; I do know that I became a better person when the time demanded it. I know now that, if people need me, I can come through without worrying about how it affects me personally.

Cirie: Thanks, guys, and again, congratulations on getting to the end. No one can take that away from you.

Jeff: Thanks, Cirie.

Cirie takes her seat.

Jeff: Charlie, we haven’t heard from you. Come on down.

Charlie takes his spot in front of the final two; he has on a gray button-down with a red tie and has completely shaved his head.

Charlie: Hi, guys. I haven’t had the chance to say much since what happened three days ago, but I’ve had a lot of time to think about it. I’m done with it; it’s in the past, and I don’t want to burden myself or anyone else with it. My questions don’t have to do with the game itself. These are things that I think are important.

Charlie turns to Ozzy first.

Charlie: Ozzy, I know your situation. I think your mother’s a very nice lady, and I know she’s done a lot for you. I also know that you have had a lot of problems having any kind of relationship with your birth father. My question for you is this – what has it meant to you to have a father figure, even if he’s not your birth father?

Ozzy: Wow again. I wasn’t expecting this, but I’ll go with it. My step-dad is more like a real father to me than a step-parent of any kind. Having a relationship with him has been important to me. I still ask myself why my birth father didn’t want anything to do with me, but I understand that it’s his loss, not mine.

Charlie: Thanks, Ozzy. That means a lot. Paula, I’ll go to you, and I know your situation very well. I love you, and I can’t imagine that I will ever stop. I love your kids, and I want to be the guy that they look up to. I know my son feels the same way about having you in his life. I wasn’t going to do this until the reunion, but after all that’s gone on here, I decided, what the hell.

Charlie drops to his left knee and take out a small box from his pocket; he opens it to face Paula.

Charlie: Paula, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I ask you in front of everyone here – will you marry me?

Paula, who’s already shaken up, begins sobbing and wiping her tears from her eyes.

The camera shows the ring, a one-carat princess-cut diamond on white gold with triangular-cut peridot stones on each side of it.

With his right hand, Charlie takes the ring out of the box, and with his left, and grabs Paula’s left hand, which has no rings on it.

Paula seems unable to respond due to shock and her face being covered in tears.

Paula (unclearly and subtitled): Yes. Yes, Charlie, I will marry you.

Charlie slides the rind on Paula’s left hand and embraces her, letting the ring box drop to the floor. The jury stands and applauds, including Terry; Ozzy and Jeff join in the ovation.

The screen shows Charlie and Paula, who kiss for about fifteen seconds before breaking the kiss. Charlie squeezes Paula’s hands and walks back to the jury side under instruction from Jeff.

The Survivors calm themselves as Charlie returns to the jury box to a slew of congratulations; immediately, upon returning, Terry shakes his hand and congratulates him, as do Yau-Man, Twila, and Tom.

Paula wraps her arms around Ozzy’s neck and is shown to thank him profusely.

Soon, order is restored to the set, and the camera focuses back on Jeff.

Jeff: Before we get on with the closing statements, I think one final congratulations is in order to Charlie and Paula. That said, I can’t say that anyone’s ever used a marriage proposal as a jury question before. It’s time now for the closing statements. Ozzy will make one, and then Paula, and then we will vote. Ozzy, go ahead.

Ozzy: I just want everyone to remember how I played this game. The game of Survivor happens around you whether you’re ready for it or not, and the people who make it far are the ones who adapt to it. No one plays the perfect game; we’re all open to criticism, of course. That said, I’ve made it this far, and I hope for your support in winning.

Jeff: Paula, your turn.

Paula: I’m a little overwhelmed here. I knew it would be a tough Council tonight for some of us, including myself, but I never imagined I’d actually be very happy right now. I’m sure you guys have all made up your minds, and whatever you guys decide to do is understandable. I’d rather have Charlie than a million dollars, but I’d rather have both if you feel like I’ve earned it.

Jeff: Thanks, guys. Here’s how the final vote works. The jury will vote one by one for the person they want to win the game. You are voting for a winner. Ozzy and Paula, you want to see your name on that parchment. There are nine votes, and it will take five to win. For the final time, it is time to vote. Cirie, you’re up first.

Cirie gets up to vote; she writes a name down, but it is not clear whose name. She returns to her seat.

As she does, Jonathan gets up to vote. The name he writes down is that of Ozzy.

Jonathan (to voting camera): I saw your work on the old Ta’aroa tribe, and I think you’ve earned this. Paula has her grand prize. Count this as a step toward yours.

Jonathan returns to his seat; the next to vote is Twila, whose vote is not shown.

Twila returns to her seat; the next to get up and vote is Danni, who is still shaken up.

She seems to take an unusual length of time in the booth, and her vote is not shown.

She dries her eyes and returns to her seat; the next to vote after her is Yau-Man.

Yau-Man writes down Paula’s name.

Yau-Man (to voting camera): Congratulations all around. Who would have expected us to become such good friends?

Yau-Man leaves the voting booth, and the next to enter is Harriet, whose vote is not shown.

Harriet heads back hobbling; she has to hold onto edges to balance herself.

After Harriet, the next to vote is Terry, who votes for Ozzy.

Terry (to voting camera): I didn’t mean any of that about you or Paula. You both deserve this, but I respect you greatly as a competitor.

Terry returns to his seat, and Tom replaces him in the voting booth.

His vote is not shown, and he writes quickly.

The final voter is Charlie, who comes up slowly and writes down a name.

His vote is for Paula.

Charlie (to voting camera): I really wish I could vote for both of you; you both deserve it, but Paula, you have my heart and you always will.

Charlie returns to his seat, a center spot in the front row cleared by Cirie.

The camera switches to Jeff.

Jeff: I’ll go get the votes.

The camera focuses on a nervous Ozzy and Paula; it then goes back to a somewhat content jury.

Jeff returns with the votes.

Jeff: I’m sure you would like to see the results right now, but this will have to wait until we’re back into the United States. I’ll see you there.

Jeff leaves the Tribal Council set with the voting urn via the same back the voted-out contestants use; he walks along the walkway and near a river, where he boards a raft. The raft is hooked to a tree by a rope; he hacks away the rope with a machete and begins to drift.

The camera shows him floating down the river to the river’s mouth, where he is rescued by a helicopter with a long ladder. He climbs onto the ladder and up into the helicopter, which appears to be staffed with U.S. military personnel, and looks down over the ocean with the urn at his side.

The helicopter flies off into the night sky as the screen cuts to commercial.

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jbug 12676 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"

08-31-07, 01:06 PM (EST)
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8. " THIS?"



is how fast I want you to return with the finale.
OK?
(that means fast, real fast!)
Great work, BTW.
JBug
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Colonel Zoidberg 3370 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"

08-31-07, 03:40 PM (EST)
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9. "RE: THIS?"
With any luck, that means Tuesday. Trust me, filling in the commercial breaks is tough.

Not as tough as the season recap in the OP...

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