Nice Survivor parody in the opening cell. Nice, subtle, really discrete Survivor parody. Whoever wins is going to wind up using their whole check to settle Burnett's inevitable lawsuit, 'cause VH1 isn't paying a thing. (Should have read that contract a little more closely.)
These may be reality veterans, but you can tell they know nothing, nothing, about competition-based shows. Why? Because both Hoopz and Whiteboy -- might as well use the nicknames: the show forget they had real ones -- missed one of the greatest golden opportunities ever offered on this series category. They knew their opposition had alliances together entering the show, knew who would be working with you -- and didn't break them up. They could have used their pick-'em choices to destroy every power group in the game before the eliminations ever got started. They didn't. Rookies.
Have we ever had a first boot handed to us on a silver platter the way Mac was served up under the dome? I guess he's only polite to women he intends to try sleeping with. Not exactly the most rare disease.
Hard to make calls on the editing just yet at least as far as picking a winner goes: you can tell who the long-term characters are going to be (thanks, extensive season preview!), but isolating the victor is a few levels up. If this was Survivor, we'd be picking apart the host's line about Hoopz being the only winner on the show for the next three months. As-is... well, VH1 is still learning the fine art of the non-subtle. Imagine how blatant they'll be after they get more practice.
Migawd, Megan and Brandi really are that dumb. Making the mistake is one thing -- 'we've got one rule: go see how fast you can break it' -- but to follow up one disqualification with another by doing the exact same thing? And yes, Megan, everyone who even remotely managed to tolerate you in your original appearance had it wear off. BTW, why is your supposed friend still being IDed as 'Brandi C?' Are we trying to avoid confusing her with all the brandy 12-Pack's already consumed? Maybe we can hide her initial where the IQ Twins put the mattress: no one will ever look for it there.
'Keep me! I can injure myself at will!'
Let us consider some of the things Chance and Mac did in their pursuit of Tiffany. Let us remember their pride at having them aired. Now let us reflect on their not going into the captaincy challenge because it would, in their opinion, make them look foolish. Why are we considering all of this in that order? Because frankly, we could use the laugh.
Nibblez is a professional dominatrix? Does she know Jane?
If you personally found Mr. Boston's pickup lines appealing, raise your hand. Buttocks, other hand. Free and open discarding of tissues, both hands over your eyes.
...Whiteboy's Jewish? Who knew?
So how many hookups are we getting before the series is over? To the nearest dozen? How many of those will be for reasons that aren't half-baked strategy? And will Mr. Boston be closed out of all of them?
Y'know what this series really needs? Saaphyri. Hosting.
I've had one hour of sleep in the last forty, so I'm now overqualified to be on the show.