Let's look into the future and consider some of the more nightmarish possibilities available in the current hamster pool. (I'm not going to go into all of them. That's your job. Besides, there's only so much of this anyone can take in one shot.)
McCrae Vs. Amanda
Oh dear gawds. I'm not spoiling anything from the live feeds by telling you she's basically informed him that should she go out first and find out he's restarted with any other female in the cage, she has vowed to pop out of Pandora's Box and hurt him very much. And at this point in the broadcast show, he seems to be seriously wondering if he can escape without gnawing his own legs off.
So imagine if he sits next to her in the finals and tries to tie her to railroad tracks. Nah, I was just using her as the lightning rod to keep the action away from me and I got some funtime out of it: ain't I clever? He wouldn't live long enough to cash the check or reach the door. Loudest -- and bloodiest -- F2 ever.
Aryan Vs. GinaMarie
"Blonde racist over here!"
"Blonde racist over here!"
"I can't listen to myself!"
"I can't listen to myself or read!"
"My winnings will go to plastic surgery and White Power!"
"Mine will go to plastic surgery, Pretty Power, creating my very own pageant where I always win, and building a special basement dungeon for my Nick!"
"I'm unemployed now and need the money!"
"Really? Me too!"
"And since most of you are lesser beings, you must do what I say!"
"That was my line!"
"Bitch!"
"Slut!"
"Have you seen your roots, Two-Tone?"
"You're going to see yours after I rip them off your scalp!"
...actually, make the above second-bloodiest.
Spencer vs. Aryan
"I openly believe in the inherent worth of Nazi medical experiments."
"Really? Well, I was secretly anagrammed for the people who created them. Top that!"
Andy vs. GinaMarie
Presenting the first-ever F2 where no contestant ever finishes a sentence. They will talk over each other. They will interrupted in mid-syllable. They may smother each other with pillows. The world will probably never know.
Judd vs... nevermind.
So much for laughs.
Email this topic to a friend
Printer-friendly version of this topic
Bookmark this topic (Registered users only)
