Here is my first attempt at a Top Ten List.... From the home office in Suburban Chicago, Illinois, here is the Top Ten Reasons Michael Cannot dance. Paul, You know Michael right?
Paul: I think Michael Jackson is a good dancer.
Dave: No, no, not that Michael. Michael is from “Love Cruise”, the new reality TV show on FOX.
Paul: Oh… With a name like “Love Cruise”, one would think Dancing would be a prerequisite.
Dave: Yes, you are right Paul. At any rate, Heeeeeere we go. The top ten reasons Michael cannot dance.
Number 10: It is too hard to talk and dance at the same time.
Number 9: The girls have never picked him to be their partner.
Number 8: His Mom never showed him the steps.
Number 7: He is too tired from staying up late. (i.e. Trying to mimic VampKira)
Number 6: By his own admission is White and Jewish
Number 5: His flames scare off all the instructors
Number 4: Accident victims rarely can dance after ride in Ambulance.
Number 3: He would have to share the stage with some other media whore. (NOTE: He got more attention Complaining and not Dancing…..)
Number 2: Michael SHAKES in all the wrong ways.
And the Number 1 reason Michael cannot dance: The Big Red Shoes just get in the way.
“Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.” -Winston Churchill