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"Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
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Cathy the Canadian 599 desperate attention whore postings
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07-03-07, 04:09 PM (EST)
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"Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
Hmmm, not sure who the guest judge is this week - it doesn't look like they've updated the website yet (unless it's Mark Waters again).

Who goes home this week?

Shalini - "Doctor in Law"
Adam - "Discovering the Wheels"
Hilary - "Under the Gun"
Will - "Nerve Endings"
David - "How to Have a Girl"
Zach - "Die Hardly Working"

I think we can all agree Zach doesn't need to sweat this week. David probably had the worst judge reaction - though after "Ghetta Rhoom", that doesn't seem to count for much. Personally, I found Adam's to be the weakest. It was like a weird car commercial, and wasn't funny.

If Will survives this week, he better have some friggin' dialogue in his next film. I didn't like Nerve Endings at all. So not funny. But he does have the potential to be really good.

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  Table of Contents

  Subject     Author     Message Date     ID  
 RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) Cathy the Canadian 07-03-07 1
 David goes home... Cathy the Canadian 07-03-07 2
   RE: David goes home... ulalame 07-04-07 6
   RE: David goes home... Loree 07-04-07 10
       RE: David goes home... PagongRatEater 07-06-07 18
 I think it's funny... Cathy the Canadian 07-03-07 3
 RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) punky930 07-03-07 4
 RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) cahaya 07-03-07 5
   RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) ulalame 07-04-07 7
       RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) mistyrose52 07-04-07 8
       RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) cahaya 07-04-07 9
           RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) HistoryDetective 07-04-07 12
 RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) Loree 07-04-07 11
 RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) Sunny_Bunny 07-04-07 13
   RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) cahaya 07-04-07 14
       RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) Sunny_Bunny 07-04-07 16
   RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) Cathy the Canadian 07-04-07 15
       RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) Sunny_Bunny 07-04-07 17
 RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3) SilverStar 07-09-07 19

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Cathy the Canadian 599 desperate attention whore postings
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07-03-07, 08:45 PM (EST)
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1. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
Guest Judge was Eli Roth (Hostel).

This week's films:

Jason - Eternal Waters
Kenny - The Malibu Myth
Andrew - Midnight Snack
Sam - Anklebiters
Mateen - Profile
Shira Lee - Open House

Horror is clearly not Shira Lee's genre. Valient effort, but very lame on the scare meter.
I have to give Mateen props for such a brave choice of subject. Very risky.
I think Eli Roth was too harsh on Jason. I think that was my fav of the night.
Sam? Hohum. Kenny? I thought it was lame. Andrew? Pretty good - he got that spooky Japanese horror thing just right.

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Cathy the Canadian 599 desperate attention whore postings
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07-03-07, 08:47 PM (EST)
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2. "David goes home..."
...no surprise there.

What did surprise me was Will getting the highest number of votes?! More than Die Hardly Working??? What gives there?

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07-04-07, 03:38 AM (EST)
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6. "RE: David goes home..."
Americans are clearly stupid, that, or Will has a good internet voting thing going.

-----

This week, I felt Kenny's was derivative -- much more decently filmed than we've seen from him before, but no surprises there -- actually, none of them shocked, scared or surprised me. I thought the "ankle-devil" guy aspires to be Steven Speilburg, but did a good job of imitation. And I think the one who's soundtrack didn't play should go on the horror premise alone -- his film was black humor, not horror. Aside from that, I'll be curious to see how the voters vote.

For once, the guest judge was useful, which was a positive.

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07-04-07, 10:59 AM (EST)
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10. "RE: David goes home..."
I did not like Will's at all. And here again we have the problem with public voting. Will obviously has alot of friends and family voting for him. Talent will probably not win this.
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07-06-07, 06:06 PM (EST)
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18. "RE: David goes home..."
Talent will win out in the end, when you have fewer people to vote for...assuming anyone is voting. I have never even watched the show close enough to air time TO vote. Will is very likeable and humble, and he has made two cute films and Nerve Endings. That's enough to keep him in Sanjaya style, for the time being. He still hasn't given his characters any dialog though.



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Cathy the Canadian 599 desperate attention whore postings
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07-03-07, 08:51 PM (EST)
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3. "I think it's funny..."
...the lack of graciousness these aspiring directors have when they're being critiqued and get a bad review from a judge.

No false smiles, or "gee, I'll do better next week if America votes for me!". I love the dirty looks and defensive attitudes. Will is the only one that looks like a little puppy dog each week, wanting to be patted on the head. The rest of them come ready to defend their work! Love it!

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07-03-07, 10:53 PM (EST)
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4. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
LAST EDITED ON 07-03-07 AT 10:54 PM (EST)

find it hard to believe "nerve endings" was top vote getter hmmmm

as for tonite:

Kenny- Malibu myth. enjoyed this. he has a great abilty with the visual look and shots. liked the different idea of blogging to recruit victims. understood everything too!

Sam -Anklebiters - the kid was really good. thought he really followed the theme.

(can someone please explain why they give away half the scary parts in the film previews????)

Andrew - Midnight Snack - Did not really fit the theme as intended imo. kept waiting for the payoff but felt disappointed at the end.

Jason- Eternal Waters. liked this a lot especially the opening sequences. thought the twins were good. had no problem realizing that was the mom never even noticed the clothing or physical characteristics. what was the judge talking about????

Shirali - Open House- good attempt but agreed with "i think" gary that there was not enough conflict to escape from the visions.didn't matter to me that it was daytime.

Mateen - Profile - horror of a different definition. ambitious and kudos to him for attempting it. i didn't feel any confusion, lack of understanding or disengagement. would not like to see him cut for this film(as opposed to his last one)

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07-03-07, 11:22 PM (EST)
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5. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
LAST EDITED ON 07-03-07 AT 11:26 PM (EST)

Welcome to the horror b-flicks, folks. Perhaps the most horrifying thing of the night was the usual vamp in black. I keep looking for a couple of fang marks on her neck, but she must have a good make-up artist do some work before she hits the stage. Notice how the guest director cringed when she went and tapped him, like he was afraid of losing at least two energy levels?

The Malibu Myth by Kenny: Not only are our protagonists clueless and totally lacking any powers of observation, they lack any sense of self-preservation. And it hasn't even started yet, so they get what's coming, with absolutely no sympathy from me. The set-up is too obvious, a body lying in the middle of a dirt road. Yeah right. Walk up to it, it wakes up and the predictable action begins, with other ghouls coming out of nowhere. Scary not. More of a C it coming a mile away flick than a B horror flick. (**1/2)

Anklebiters by Sam: The only scary part was the very first munch on the ankle. But wait? Where did that monster come from? It was already under the covers? And Fido barks, but doesn't try to help his faithful kid master? Hmmmph, dumb dog. The kid gets away, and the landshark (we never see its fin, tail or entire body, so we know it's a fake) catches up and gets another munch in. And where's Fido now? Cut. Next day. Cop walks in and... where did the landshark go? Oh, well, never knew ya, kid. Mediocre special effects and a weak ending. No comp for Jaws.(**1/2)

Midnight Snack by Andrew: More humor than horror, but I liked it anyway. We envision who the midnight snack is gonna be early on, but guess what? She runs the show. Where's the remote? is a bit too much of a cliche, but it scores as we realize who we thought was going to be a midnight snack eats a midnight snack herself. Only thing missing here is a cut at the end to some horror flick, like The Omen, on the TV. Not really scary, but a unique mix of humor and horror.(***1/2) Best of the night

Eternal Waters by Jason: I felt like I got jerked around in this one. The burglar with the knife suddenly appearing in the house seems to be a more unlikely event than the appearance of the ghost of the son who ends up saving mom's life. Interesting premise, and an unusual effect with the water flowing out of the frame photo and than later back into it. Nice try, and although I liked the concept, the acting was weak and the clip was a bit too disjointed for me. (***)

Open House by Shira-Lee: No fright in this one, just a shake of the head at some about-to-give-birth pregnant lady who decides to sit in the very same rocking chair she just saw a ghost sitting in. I mean, like, yeah, no worries, go ahead and plop your butt there, lady. Nothing'll happen. But, of course, it does, and we get a little lecture of a story from Aunty Ghosty who finally gets around to saying, "Get out!" And, lo and behold, the pregnant lady does just that. Too easily. What's the lesson in this story? I dunno, do you? Nothing redeeming in this clip, really, except the shaking door knob.(*1/2)

Profile by Mateen: Well, yeah, let's just say it. Racial profile. Not so much horror as an in your face commentary about racist pigs (slang for policemen). The white cop in the shades (along with his buddies later) is the horror. The black cop without the shades is a relief. Alternate universes. One universe, a rather bloody (and let's add, horrific) beating. Another universe, it's a simple "Is there a problem, officer?" The first-person / third-person POV switches were confusing. The beating was all too realistic. The scenario (traffic stop) leading to it was realistic, too, but how did we get from point A to point B? Finally, a horror flick is something that scares the daylights out of you, even as you munch on the popcorn, slurp up your Coke, and feel glad to see daylight once you're out of the matinee show. This clip just makes you leave the popcorn and Coke for the cleanup crew, and you walk out of the theater still feeling uneasy. One star, with one extra star for lasting effect. (**)

Should be out next week: Shira-Lee, possibly Mateen. Kenny and Sam didn't do so hot either.


A Sharnina Production

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07-04-07, 04:09 AM (EST)
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7. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
Love your summaries of the films, but totally differ in my asessment of them.

I thought Sam's Anklebiter was the only one presented tonight that was the least bit scary. Jason's was a close second.

Kenny's was good, but derivative. Shira-Lee's was like an M.Night film without the time to shoot it, but was good for what she got done. Mateen's wasn't horror in the least, but was thought provoking and well-shot.

While I liked the concept of Andrew's film, it wasn't a horror film, in the least. Nothing scary about it.

If I didn't hate Kenny from previous rounds, I'd pick him to go this round. Otherwise, I'd say Andrew, because he didn't do what they asked of him.

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07-04-07, 09:43 AM (EST)
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8. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
I certainly am not even close in the realm of critiqing anyone who is trying to work as a film director. All I can say is how I felt watching these clips.

And this is it: I don't like horror flicks, don't like blood and gore (not even Al), but worst of all for me, is when a movie depicts even the slightest hint of a dead child. THAT to me is utterly horrible!!

So, on that count, I'd have to give props to Jason, even if he DID dress the mother in some tweeny outfit. Who was looking? Not me!

As for the rest-predictable, laughable, and just stupid, IMHO. Even Mateen-sorry, dude, it's been done so many times, you didn't create or produce or force the hand of anything that we don't already know.

I think Mateen or the lady (Shira Lee?) will be say BaBye next week.

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07-04-07, 10:54 AM (EST)
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9. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
Love your summaries of the films, but totally differ in my assessment of them.

That's to be expected and it makes discussion about them all the more fun.

I'll agree Anklebiter had the single scariest moment of the night, maybe two moments if you count the second bite. The ending was something of a let down, though, as I had expected the landshark to give the detective a surprise, too. Also agree Kenny's Malibu Beach was too derivative, lacking imagination as a B-horror copy with no real surprises. Shira-Lee could have built in more suspense and conflict in Open House even within the clip's time limit. It went all too easily, without a defining moment - to "get out" without some kind of struggle just doesn't do it. Mateen's Profile was indeed thought-provoking (and a stomach churner), but it wasn't really horror from an entertainment viewpoint - more of a political statement than entertainment. While Andrew's Midnight Snack wasn't really horror and all that scary (the scariest moment being when the girl looks back over her shoulder with an "are you talking to me?" look), I liked the unique mix of humor and horror, kinda like the song Monster Mash.

As for who goes out, it's hard to predict the voters, and I wouldn't be surprised if it was something of a surprise. Any voting RTV show has its disappointments, so I'm not putting any emotional attachment to any aspiring director aside from Zach, who is clearly head and shoulders above the rest.


A Sharnina Production


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07-04-07, 12:39 PM (EST)
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12. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
While Andrew's Midnight Snack wasn't really horror and all that scary (the scariest moment being when the girl looks back over her shoulder with an "are you talking to me?" look), I liked the unique mix of humor and horror, kinda like the song Monster Mash.

As a fan of programs like Buffy the Vampire Slayer, I appreciated Andrew's film. I thought that he took a broader view of the horror genre, quite appropriately, and he made a film that fit his personality rather than simply catering to stereotypical expectations. He chose a sub-genre of horror that aims to be entertaining rather than simply scary --- and if entertaining the audience is the ultimate criteria for assessing the success of a film, then he did quite well in my book.

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07-04-07, 11:07 AM (EST)
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11. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
None of the films really worked for me. They either started strong and went downhill. Or they were predictable and I could tell exactly what was going to happen which made it boring. And whenever a director has to explain to us what it was about I feel they failed. They should not have to explain it afterwards. I really have no idea who will go home. Seems that the voting doesn't always match with the talent.
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13. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
I have to say, that finally this show does seem to be improving, but then again it may be to little, to late. According to rating numbers this morning, it was beat out by a two hour repeat of America’s Got Talent, a repeat of NCIS, and a repeat of According To Jim.

I used to blame most of the problems of this show on the inept but lovely-to-look-at hostess. But the production staff did figure out how to mask her weakness by making her stand still or sit down to deliver her lines most of the time. They even managed to outfit her as a young classy starlet last night, rather than putting her in ever-shrinking hemlines that made one wonder if by the end of the season, she would be standing on stage in pasties and a thong. (this is FOX, after all) So, they have fixed the host dilemma, even if she is still a bit to huggy, touchy-feely for my taste -- but that does rather effectively demonstrate just how she got this job.

Then I blamed the production itself. I mean really, how do you present this show as a formulaic clone of American Idol? But, like the hostess problem, they did seem to fix that too. America still votes, but we have been spared waiting to see who gets cut, and the judges while a bit rambling, are at least likable. The biggest problems are no longer all that glaring. So why would America choose re-runs over watching new movies every week? Could it be the movies?

Yeah, it could be the movies. Ok, it’s the movies, and the people who vote for them. Yes, they did dump one of my two picks for bottom of the barrel last week, but they also declared my other choice, which had no dialog, cliché sight gags, and a tired storyline, the BEST of the bunch. Sigh.

So, here are the Bunny Picks for this week, although now you know that whoever I say should go will stay and be declared Oscar worthy by the American Voting Public.

1. Eternal Waters: I really liked this one. I liked the camera shots, the tone of the piece, and the message that even death will not stop the love between mother and son. I really thought the comment about the mother’s attire was a bit stupid; guess what, guest director, there ARE mothers out there who dress in tight shirts to show off their big boobs. My biggest complaint was not what the mother was wearing. My biggest complaint was that she really didn’t come off as particularly frightened of the guy wielding the knife intent on killing her. But the story and the cinematography were stronger than the rest of the pack, which is why I put Jason on top this week.

2. Midnight Snack: I liked this movie even though Andrew decided to not follow the true directions of the assignment. This was more a comedy along the lines of Scary Movie. (Though not as farcical) I liked that the protagonist seemed to be completely oblivious to the “evil” around her, and I liked the twist ending that explained why she was so blind to it. Yes, the remote line was a bit silly – but this had a lot of good things going for it, including the title that misdirects the viewer.

3. Anklebiters Yes, the skinned cat looked like a Muppet made by a crack addict. Yes, the dog basically yipping a quick “you’re on your own kid” made me wish the Muppet would then turn on the dog, and yes, the ending was lacking. What should have happened is that the dog nipped the cops ankle, dragged the guy under the table, where he “shared” the guy with the Muppet. Had Sam shot it that way, then the fact that the dog didn’t do thing one to save the little boy would have made sense.

4. Open House I think Shira-lee was on the right track with this one, but it fell apart mid way. I mean really, the husband says “sit down, I’ll get you a glass of water” when they are standing in an EMPTY house! What, the previous owner left the house empty except for a rocking chair and a water glass? My, how conveeeeeeeeeeenient.

Then, the ghost (who did her acting very well) is allowed to touch the pregnant wife (and omg, she was big enough to be carrying triplets) with NO reaction from the wife at all?

5. Profile: Mateen went out on a very big limb on this one, but one mans racism IS another mans “horror.” I think this would have worked, but Waters was correct; there were so many pov’s that you were never really sure whose story was being told. And you need to know whose story this is, to understand the “horror” element and react to it.

6. Malibu Myth: Oh yea Kenny, we have never seen the “urban legend” thing before now have we? There were multiple problems with this film. Perhaps it was that a bunch of rich kids in Malibu being turned into zombies seems more poetic justice than horror. Perhaps it was the fact that geeky/horny camera guy seemed more like a fly to be swatted than a sympathetic victim. Perhaps it was the fact that the woman going after this story had no discernible powers of observation, nor did she posses the “kick butt, survive at all costs” instinct. Perhaps it was the fact that the zombies had more animation and passion than their victims. I don’t know; but except for the great shot of the teeth of the zombie in the middle of the road, I wasn’t scared. I was laughing my tush off.

But, to be fair to all of these directors, 3 minutes to scare the snot out of you seems like an almost impossible task. About the only thing I can think of that would scare anyone that fast was if I was to turn to Ra and say “Guess what honey? We’re preggers!”


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07-04-07, 06:04 PM (EST)
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14. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
I love your reviews! You're like my other half of the original Siskel and Ebert duo.


A Sharnina Production

And I won't argue with you, you're the snarkier one. I'm just a critic.

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16. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
LAST EDITED ON 07-04-07 AT 07:31 PM (EST)

Hee hee, I'll take that job, I love your reviews to!

Seriously, my dream job would be the voice of one of the bots when they brought back Mystery Science Theater 3000.


I live to snark, and snark to live.

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Cathy the Canadian 599 desperate attention whore postings
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07-04-07, 06:56 PM (EST)
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15. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
I'm with you Sunny Bunny - and agreed, Eli Roth was way off base when he criticised Jason's choice of attire for his actress. What did he want to see her in? A big baggy sweater? That would be more believable? Whatever. I didn't even notice what she was wearing.

If I were Jason, I'd be a little peeved at having to stand and take such lame criticism from a guy who's two big films, "Hostel" and "Hostel 2", were both universally panned by critics.

Couldn't Spielburg have used his clout to get some good directors to guest judge?

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17. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
LAST EDITED ON 07-04-07 AT 07:35 PM (EST)


There were two things wrong about going on about her attire. The son died in the SUMMER, when most women wear T-shirts, and since the killer broke in at NIGHT, I would imagine he wanted her in a flannel from neck to ankle.

THIS would have been the week to have Wes Craven on!

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19. "RE: Final 12 Episode 2 (July 3)"
I'm late. I wasn't able to watch the show last week (and didn't care enough to tape it) so I just watched the videos on-line. I was not impressed. None of them were BAD, but I didn't really like any of them either. Not too original.

The ghostly-faced girl in Midnight Snack was a rip-off of the character from The Grudge.

The water leaking out of the frame and then disappearing back into it in Jason's film was a rip-off of Final Destination.

Kenny's film was a rip-off of some movie that I can't exactly remember. Cabin Fever? Wrong Turn? One of those, or something exactly like it.

Don't these guys have any ideas of their own? *yawn*

I might have liked Anklebiters if not for the stupid voiceover in the beginning claiming to have found a new species-- the ankle biter. That made it hard for me to take the movie seriously and thus, I was not scared by it.

Can't they give these people more than 2 minutes for their films??


Drinkin' with Ahkie!

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