LAST EDITED ON 07-09-04 AT 08:15 AM (EST)

I want to start off by saying that MTW did a great job last week with the update and I hope to live up to his standard. Also, I really like the idea of using a different color text for my words. I am going to that as well!

We start the episode at breakfast on Thursday at 9:00am. Marty comes into the ladies’ room and announces that they will be going skeet shooting. Skeet shooting is one of dad’s favorite activities.

Marty is going to show each of the ladies how to load and shoot the gun. Nicole is up first and when she shoots the gun, she isn’t ready for the kickback and jumps like the gun has done something wrong! All the women act scared.

NOTE TO THE WOMEN: You have to grip the gun tight and pull the trigger smoothly! Geez!

Tammy goes next and she too jumps like she has been shot! She turns to the other women and remarks, “that’s gonna pop my implant”! If her implants pop we are in trouble! If the fluid settles in her stomach, she will go from a size 2 to at least a size 8 or 9! How horrible would that be?

The ladies all take their turn and then out of no where trots a beautiful little doggie with a skeet in it’s mouth. It trots to the daughters and gives them the skeet. The skeet contains a message that states the ladies have one shot to hit skeet. If they don’t hit it, a negative thing will be revealed about them.

Nicole misses and the dog runs to retrieve the skeet with the bad thing written on it. Where did this dog come from? The revealing fact is that she is so untrusting that she has spent hours in front of her boyfriend’s house to make sure he isn’t cheating on her. She admits this is true. OH BOY! That is exactly what Marty needs…A STALKER!

Melanie misses next and the dog retrieves the skeet where we learn that she (Melanie) can’t cook and keeps ketchup ONLY in her refrigerator! She claims she eats ketchup by the spoonfuls. Marty needs me to cook him a good hot home cooked meal…the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach!

Suzanne likes to sit in her hot tub naked and had to erect a privacy fence so her neighbors could not see her (hehehe…I said erect). Come on guys, what’s wrong with being nekkid? I am more appalled that she built the fence!

Sharon has commitment phobia! She has been engaged twice and never made it down the isle. She was engaged at 19 & 24 years of age. The daughters press her about whether she would marry her ex. She says if he proposed today, they would have to discuss whether to get married or not. WTF? Sounds like she may still carry a flame for her ex!

Tammy refuses to change her name if she gets married again. The daughters don’t like it when Tammy gets adamant that she will not change her name PERIOD! Hey ladies, you can’t blame her! How would you like to sign your name if it were Tammy Lynn Smith Jones Thomas Michell Davis Okland? Hell, it would take forever!

Stacy has been married three times and married the second husband twice. I have never understood why someone wants to make the same mistake twice. When in a committed relationship, you should always, always try every avenue before giving up. Then, you won’t make the same mistake twice!

Marilyn is just so sore from her first shot, there is no way she can shoot the gun again! WTF? What a wimp! Marilyn asks Marty to take her shot for her and he does. At this point in time, I would be throwing the BS flag! Every lady should participate or surrender the bad point immediately! Anyways, Marty hit the target and the bad thing will remain secret!

Ring…Ring…Ring…The fax machine!

The fax states that since Marilyn won the competition due to Marty, they are going to reveal that Marilyn regularly donates time and money to the Make A Wish foundation! Good grief! How else can we manipulate the daughters? Now we know that Marilyn is a little generous person! URGH!

During dinner, the doorbell rings and the puppy appears…someone please explain where this dog came from? The dog brings one last skeet to the daughters. The message is that the daughters have 15 minutes to eliminate one of the ladies! The daughters chat with Marty and then he leaves them to decide.

They all meet in the living room for the elimination. Suzanne is shown in a confessional saying that she has so many feelings for Marty and doesn’t want to go home. Suzanne, honey, you have not even spent “alone” time with the man. What kind of feelings do you really have? It could just be gas or cooties! Back to the elimination, Tammy is going home and the tears come from everyone! Why are these peeps such wimps? Just make the damn decision and move on! GEEZ! Marty is crying too! Now, GET OUT OF THE HOUSE!

Suzanne is shown in a confessional saying that she hopes Marty picks her for the after dinner drink because she can’t stand the thought of him being with the other women! WHAT? I think we have found our stalker!

Marty picks Melanie for the nightcap! Marty presents her with a bowl of ketchup. Strike up the porn music as Melanie proceeds to make love to the spoon as she is licking the ketchup off! They have a chat and depart for the night without kissing as Marty goes to take a cold shower. Okay, I added the cold shower but it seems to fit here!

The next day is Marty’s birthday! All the ladies are there to PAR TAH! The daughters make every lady go up to Marty and act like they are married and introduce themselves to their friends by using Okland as their last name. Doorbell! The mailman delivers a package that contains a box with foam fingers. Each lady takes their finger and writes the name of the person they think should go home next. The ladies have to write the name in private then they have to reveal their thoughts by pointing the finger directly at their choice!

Sharon points to Melanie. Marilyn points to Nicole. Nicole points to Sharon. Melanie, Stacy and Suzanne points to Marilyn!

After the show MTW had this to say about what has happened so far:
“I thought not only was it unfair that Marilyn didn't have a bad fact revealed about her, but then they uncovered a good fact because she was the winner. I wonder if that was the real reason she was "pointed at" by three other women.”

The daughters go to get coffee and the dreaded fax machine rings. Pick the two least compatible for the lie detector!

The daughters talk with their dad and he tells them that he is not attracted to Nicole and there is no need to keep her! The daughters decide to send Sharon and Marilyn to the lie detector. WOW! They went against Marty’s wishes!

Sharon will go first!

Question 1:Would you get mad at dad if he bought her a household appliance for Valentines?
Answer YES
True

Question 2:Have you made fun of us behind our backs?
Answer NO
Lie

Question 3:If dad gained 50 pounds would you still marry him?
Answer YES
True

Question 4:If your ex wasn’t married and he proposed would you marry him?
Answer NO
Lie

Marilyn goes next!

Question 1:If you marry dad, can we go on the honeymoon? WTF kind of question is this?
Answer NO
True

Question 2:If you marry dad, are you going to try and change him? Another WTF kind of question is this?
Answer NO
Lie

Question 3:Were you rude to any of the women?
Answer NO
True

Question 4:Are you here to find true love?
Answer YES
True

They all meet in the living room for the decision. Sharon will be leaving the house immediately if not sooner! She gets a lifetime supply of Rice-A-Roni for participating! She is shown in a confessional talking about how she hasn’t been married and that she is looking for true love! Always a bridesmaid and never a bride!

After Sharon leaves, the doorbell rings. The Justice of the Peace appears and announces that at the end of the game, there will be no proposal! There will be a wedding!

MTW’s final words on the show:
“And what about the justice of the peace and the whole wedding thing. Marry a woman you've known for two weeks? That's crazy!”

Next week MTW takes the reigns as the tension mounts!

OH.THE.DRAMA

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