1. Fantasia Burrino
Girlfriend finally earns Diva of the Week with a truly Tiara-worthy performance. In a pink backless halter dress (with sequined gathered o-rings at the breastbone and collarbones) and exquisite chandelier earrings, she was simply stunning. And the unflattering hard hairline I have complained about in the past was gone, replaced with starkly highlighted extensions. Her teary eyed rendition of ‘Summertime’ (belted to the sky while kneeling plaintively on the stage floor) was showy, glamorous, and nothing short of FIERCE. You go girl! (She still needs to work on those teeth, though… I have two words for you, Fantasia: Porcelain. Veneers.) 2. LaToya London
LaToya got the full Diva treatment from Fox this week, complete with halo lighting and the patented Clay Aiken circle-cam. Her short hair is also highlighted now which only seemed to make her freakishly white teeth (are you listening, Fantasia?) pop even more. And while I loved her fitted black slacks and strappy black tank, I do have a couple of minor quibbles with her ensemble. First of all, she borrowed Fantasia’s ‘Something About Mary’ earrings from last week. Secondly, she wore an odd adornment that appeared to be part jewelry, part garment… sort of like the bastard stepchild of a necklace and a vest. Next time, LaToya, leave the designing to the professionals, and leave the ‘Neckvest’ at home.
3. Jennifer Hudson
Jennifer was classy and a bit more understated this week, in a long basic black dress and strappy heels. With her hair softened and wavy, and her makeup a bit toned down, she was the ‘kindler, gentler’ Jennifer this week, and I for one liked it. (Still not happy with the earring choices, though, girl. This week she wore a spacy series of interlocking hoops that reminded me of planetary orbit rings.)
4. Diana Degarmo
Simon had it pegged this week, Diana is just too young for this kind of mature song and look. In truth, she seemed like a little girl doing her best to be a woman in her mom’s finest outfit. The shirred black asymmetrical dress and black strappy heels were just fine, and her newly-blonde wavy hair fell softly on her shoulders. Blah, blah, blah. There was nothing wrong with the look, per se, it just didn’t seem like Little Diana belonged in it.
5. Jasmine Trias
Jasmine was much too casual this week, especially when compared to the elegance of the other finalists. In low-rise jeans, a rhinestone belt and matching bracelet, a pink cotton crop top, pink pointy flats, and her ubiquitous pink Plumeria, she looked like she was ready to go to work behind the cosmetics counter at the Honolulu Fashion Plaza, not sing live in front of millions. You’re beautiful, Jasmine, and you’re singing a timeless classic. Dress appropriately!
6. John Stephens
I hate to rank John this high, but let’s face it, he looked pretty decent this week. In a (slightly too large) white tux jacket, untucked white tux shirt and dark jeans, he was sporting the elegant/casual combination that is cutting edge in current fashion. (I still want him out next week.)
7. George Huff
George’s look this week was as uninspired as his song choice. In a dull-as-toast gray suit, and gray/black/cream vertical-striped sweater, he attempted casual elegance and failed. We prefer the funkier, looser George, who wore more interesting colors and patterns. Bring him back next week, please.
8. Jon Peter Lewis
Oh, how the mighty have fallen! In black slacks, black clompy patent leather shoes, a black cotton jacket that resembled the hideous Members Only style, and a too-tight burgundy T with a rainbow of text, his look was a crashing bomb. He even looked like he had… dare I say it… a belly. (Shudder at the thought.) In fact, JPL’s first bad fashion week also became his last week on the show. Perhaps people are finally voting appropriately! On looks alone!
There are certainly some who will scoff at my use of shallow, surface attributes to judge our Idol Finalists. I say, to those who scoff, they can all kiss my tanned, hairless, Stairmaster-toned a$$.
Larry Johnson is a comedy writer, currently working for Disney TV. Look for his weekly commentary from a gay point of view. Please check out his website, http://www.gaycomedyjournals.com/
Cumulative Rankings:
1. LaToya London 1.8 (2, 1, 2, 2, 2)
2. Jennifer Hudson 2.8 (4, 2, 4, 1, 3)
3. Jasmine Trias 3.8 (1, 4, 3, 6, 5)
4. George Huff 4.4 (3, 3, 5, 4, 7)
5. Fantasia Burrino 4.6 (5, 5, 7, 5, 1)
6. Diana Degarmo 6.8 (9, 8, 6, 7, 4)
7. John Stephens 8.2 (7, 9, 10, 9, 6)
R.I.P.:
8. Jon Peter Lewis 4.5 (6, 6, 1, 3, 8)
9. Camille Velasco 8.9 (11, 11, 9, 8)
10. Amy Adams 8.3 (10, 7, 8)
11. Matt Rogers 11 (12,10)
12. Leah LaBelle 8 (8)
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