Email this topic to a friend Printer-friendly version of this topic Bookmark this topic (Registered users only)		Archived thread - Read only  Previous Topic | Next Topic
Conferences Starting Over General Discussion Forum (Protected)
Original message

Lisalou 10 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Got Milk? Spokesperson" 12-20-05, 04:43 PM (EST) "These exercises are NOT real life!" I get so frustrated when watching them do some of their exercises. Today Rhonda has Kim creating the doll house then proceeds to tear it apart. Rhonda says that if it were HER life, she would stop her from destroying it. Well, yes Kim probably would too. BUT it's an exercise and you are her coach and she probably feels that she isn't supposed to stop you. Same with Allison's hole in the bucket exercise. Iyanla says that Allison just needs to learn to say "no thank you." I think if I were doing the exercise, I wouldn't know that I had the option to tell them not to help me. How are they supposed to know when it's ok to go against the exercise and when it isn't? I just hate seeing how they parallel everything to real life when it isn't always so. btw...love the forums here. First time posting, but have been lurking for for awhile. Thanks for the fun   Top

Subject     Author     Message Date     ID    RE: These exercises are NOT real li... pinktiger 12-20-05 1    RE: These exercises are NOT real li... cjarman 12-20-05 2        RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Jerdle 12-20-05 3  RE: These exercises are NOT real li... horsewhisperer 12-20-05 4    RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Baxtera 12-20-05 5        RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Lisalou 12-20-05 6            RE: These exercises are NOT real li... rsmith6861 12-20-05 7                RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Baxtera 12-21-05 8                    RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Twinkles 12-25-05 9    RE: These exercises are NOT real li... AshLanie 12-26-05 11        RE: These exercises are NOT real li... OklaBlue 12-26-05 12  RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Santaklaws 12-25-05 10    RE: These exercises are NOT real li... faithnj 12-26-05 13        RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Baxtera 12-27-05 14            RE: These exercises are NOT real li... lavendarJ 12-27-05 15                RE: These exercises are NOT real li... lovelucila 12-27-05 16  RE: These exercises are NOT real li... tanyalynne71 12-28-05 17    RE: These exercises are NOT real li... AshLanie 12-28-05 18        RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Baxtera 12-28-05 19            RE: These exercises are NOT real li... OklaBlue 12-28-05 20                RE: These exercises are NOT real li... AshLanie 12-28-05 21            RE: These exercises are NOT real li... lavendarJ 12-28-05 22                RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Baxtera 12-29-05 23        RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Labyrinth 12-29-05 24            RE: These exercises are NOT real li... GoodnightLittleBear 12-29-05 25                RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Baxtera 12-29-05 26                    RE: These exercises are NOT real li... bigbutt 12-29-05 27            RE: These exercises are NOT real li... OklaBlue 12-30-05 28                RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Baxtera 01-04-06 29  RE: These exercises are NOT real li... MovinOnUp 01-04-06 30    RE: These exercises are NOT real li... Baxtera 01-04-06 31        Life Coaching flexy633 01-05-06 32            RE: Life Coaching OklaBlue 01-05-06 33                RE: Life Coaching pegasustt 01-05-06 36            RE: Life Coaching Baxtera 01-05-06 34                RE: Life Coaching OklaBlue 01-05-06 35                    RE: Life Coaching flexy633 01-06-06 37                        RE: Life Coaching Baxtera 01-06-06 38                            RE: Life Coaching flexy633 01-06-06 39

Lobby | Topics | Previous Topic | Next Topic

Messages in this topic

pinktiger 19 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Got Milk? Spokesperson" 12-20-05, 05:26 PM (EST) 1. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" I so AGREE with this!!! I've said it before and I'll say it again: these life coaches need coaches! they need MORE Dr. Stans in that house. These women have real & serious problems and they have gone into that house expecting help. And what do they get? Dripping buckets! Ridiculous! It looks like a mean game sometimes. They got rid of one of the LCs from the first season, right? Well, let's try one less LC and one extra Dr. Or maybe add another Dr who works more consistently with the guests.   Top

cjarman 8 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "American Cancer Society Spokesperson" 12-20-05, 06:03 PM (EST) 2. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" It's kinda like that exercise with TJ and the box. That went on way too long. If I was new to the house i dont think i would be stopping the LC either. Couldn't you just picture it though. lol   Top

Jerdle 14 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Got Milk? Spokesperson" 12-20-05, 06:32 PM (EST) 3. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" I agree. Kim probably didn't know she could resist what Rhonda was doing. She had only been in the house for one day and having nothing to compare the excercise to, probably figured Rhonda was in charge of it and knew what she was doing. She needs time to understand that it's okay to get mad, be sad, resist when necessary and participate more fully in the excercises. I really like Kim and was just broken hearted listening to her tell her story. Her eyes tell so much - they are so sad.   Top

horsewhisperer 95 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Hollywood Squares Square" 12-20-05, 06:45 PM (EST) 4. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" Welcome Lisalou! You're right. Sometimes it appears that no one has advised the HG's as to the rules, before they play the "game". Dana   Top

Baxtera 923 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 12-20-05, 08:30 PM (EST) 5. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" However the rules change of when you can resist and when you can't. At one point Allison was supposed to tell IV no she wouldn't clean out the refrig. and instead she got in trouble for complying with the assignment. Jill got yelled at for not wanting to carry around her luggage. Allison wants to move the buckets closer, a logical choice after all the other times they've been yelled at for not seeing the obvious (the ring toss assignment) and she's told she's looking for the easy way out. I think there isn't enough teaching and too many confusing metophors going on. People are always trying to play how do I please the life coach instead of working on how to I fix myself.   Top

Lisalou 10 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Got Milk? Spokesperson" 12-20-05, 09:53 PM (EST) 6. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" Yes, exactly! I just don't think it's fair to say that's how they would react in real life when they were just doing what the LC told them to. Sometimes it's ok and sometimes it's not.   Top

rsmith6861 47 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beauty Pageant Celebrity Judge" 12-20-05, 11:04 PM (EST) 7. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" Personally, I feel the criteria for being admitted into the SO house should be that the HG's have already gone through counseling with a LICENSED Psychologist and the SO house should be a step down from that. I seriously feel that many of the HG's are too troubled or have had too much damage for the minimal training these life coaches have had. I can see them being utilized to teach patients who have already been taught the tools for survival how to implement these tools in real life, but in my opinion, they're not educated or trained to deal with the clients they've had on the show...there is one exception from this season and that's the young lady who lost her mom on 9/11. I think Rhonda did an excellent job of teaching her that instead of mourning her mom's death by avoiding the anniversary to celebrate her mom's existance by doing something positive on that date instead. But in my opinion, this young lady didn't have deep seeded problems like Lisa, Kim, Christina, TJ and Jill have. Even Jill isn't as "sick" or dysfunctional as the other house guests are and will probably benefit from her stay at the SO house, but the others need more intense therapy by a LICENSED psychologist or psychiatrist BEFORE a life coach even touches them.   Top

Baxtera 923 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 12-21-05, 09:21 AM (EST) 8. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" The one person I do think they've done well by is that Jill has seemed to do well with the various people they've sent her to visit. Regardless of their credentials, you can see her putting pieces of what they've said together to get to an understanding she isn't getting with IV. I must say I've actually learned quite a bit about forgiveness and letting go from the visits she's made. I wish they'd have more of those types of exercises and less of the shame/blame/humiliation exercises they have been having lately.   Top

Twinkles 324 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Cooking Show Host" 12-25-05, 06:43 PM (EST) 9. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" I love this phrase! I'll be thinking of it next month during the show. Time for another "shame/blame/humiliation exercise " Time to guess the rules and then when we tell you what you could have done right we'll smile gently and act sanctimonious with that "you didn't get it right because you're all screwed up" look, when actually it would have required mind-reading or getting an advance look at the script.   Top

AshLanie 895 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 12-26-05, 06:36 AM (EST) 11. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" >Welcome Lisalou! You're right. Sometimes >it appears that no one >has advised the HG's as >to the rules, before they >play the "game". >Dana But but but......they do know the rules.....they have watched past seasons of S.O. and know exactly what goes on.....they come onto the show knowing full well how they might be treated, edited etc. And I would bet a majority of these ladies have read some sort of S.O. forum also.....reading how the viewers feel about the show and how it has changed its' original format from season one. Are these ladies playing a *char* in order to be on a reality show to have their 15mins of fame and hoping maybe even more than the 15mins? This is not a reality show anymore......it is ratings, bad drama, and way for the LC's to market themselves. You don't think Allison was put up to moaning and groaning about not having a second graduation? It made for good drama...and voila, now more drama as she gets what she wants and awaits the ceremony......she can now lay claim to being the ONLY housemate to have ahd two bonefide graduations. Which is a farce considering IV and Dr Stan both made a point that she had already gradauted and wouldn't be having another...so both LIED. It is what I call now a Springer Opera (S.O.): A combo of Jerry Springer and a Soap Opera.   Top

OklaBlue 1244 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest" 12-26-05, 10:00 AM (EST) 12. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" Good points! Jerry Soap?   Top

Santaklaws 59 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Hollywood Squares Square" 12-25-05, 08:22 PM (EST) 10. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" I agree. It's like they create these visual exercises just for entertainment value. I also agree that some of the HG's problems are ones that should be tackled by more than just a life coach/an occasional session with Dr. Stan. Some of the HGs could benefit from weekly therapy, specific support groups, evaluations for other ailments (e.g. ADHD), etc.   Top

faithnj 39 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beauty Pageant Celebrity Judge" 12-26-05, 09:14 PM (EST) 13. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" Ok...I appreciate that everyone has an opinion and everyone sees things differently. So since the majority of responses to this thread have weighed on the side of "these exercises are not real life," I'd like to weigh in with the fact that SOME people do get something out of these exercises. Allison's water bucket exercise was one of the best, in my opinion. And I had my husband watch that execise today-- and he really agreed. Unlike Allison and me, he guessed pretty early on that Allison needed to tell the people who came to help her that she could do the job for herself. Faithnj   Top

Baxtera 923 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 12-27-05, 09:53 AM (EST) 14. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" LAST EDITED ON 12-27-05 AT 09:55 AM (EST) Actually I thought her first idea of moving the buckets mirrored and earlier lesson they had been taught with the toss game that you should look for alternatives. I think sometimes there isn't enough concrete prior to the abstract lessons and they do get confused. Allsion is told to clean and she's yelled at for cleaning up other people's messes, she followed the rules and gets in trouble. The house guests see the game set up and follow there assumtions of how it should be played and are told they are wrong for not looking for alternatives. Allsion actally internalized these ideas and is told she's lazy for looking for an easy way out. My reply to IV about moving myslef closer to the source of love is that you need to position yourself in a place to be open to love. If you aren't in a place where you can meet people, get to know them, etc. you aren't likely to find love and friendship. Then again I wouldn't be looking to join IV's worship site.   Top

lavendarJ 37 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beauty Pageant Celebrity Judge" 12-27-05, 05:04 PM (EST) 15. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" I think the exercises are great... I think it is good to have the approaches that the LC's use because everyone isn't going to be open to sitting in a psychotherapist office chair taling about when they were two while the therapist quietly writes. I also think that both the LC's have a incredible amount of experiences besides their chosen training and schooling. This speaks volumes as someone who has gone the degree route and knows of fellow classmates who are PhD candidates and totally cluesless about the real world and can only relate to text book cases. I think the challenge is to be open to receiving some thing fromt he exercise rather than just completing it. I think that the new girl's exercise (from Rhonda) was a good way of showing her how she perceives herself from what is real about herself, and her past and her experiences.   Top

lovelucila 55 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Hollywood Squares Square" 12-27-05, 09:29 PM (EST) 16. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" The excersises help me to see things from a differant perspective. Such as the water bucket excersise when IV said sometimes giving yourself the love you need can be an arguous journey. it made me realize how I take sorcuts to try to get the love I want. in the meantime I waste it. just like alison was wasting the water. it was a metaphor for how we wasteit ourselves by not being patient enough to do the work.   Top

tanyalynne71 1 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "American Cancer Society Spokesperson" 12-28-05, 05:11 AM (EST) 17. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" I have to disagree...I think the exercises ARE real life.....it's a learning experiment...They arent suppose to know how to handle things right away. The whole Allison and the bucket thing...She wasn't suppose to know that it was ok to say "no thank you" Iyanla was showing her how she is pushed and pushed and she never says it....Iyanla then had to tell her she could....she had to understand it first...thats why they are called exercises...they are learning experiences...just my opinion   Top

AshLanie 895 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 12-28-05, 07:55 AM (EST) 18. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" I would love to hear from bonefide LC's regarding the exercises. If one doesn't get the exercise, does an LC give the answer or should the client be given another exercise so she herself gets it without being told the answer? That is my pet peeve this season. The ladies, mainly Allsion, go through the motions of an exercise, then are given the answer to how they should have approached it. How would you bonefide LC's handle these exercises......?   Top

Baxtera 923 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 12-28-05, 08:46 AM (EST) 19. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" I think the one that bothered me was Jill choosing the things to take with her and then being told she chose wrong without even hestiation from IV. My issue all along is that do to the entertainment factor these woman aren't being built with small exercises that move into larger exercises but because we need to be entertained there is this constant need for big humiliation type of learning. One thing that was drilled into me over and over during my teaching classes is if you want kids to be creative thinkers telling them their creative thinking is wrong is the quickest way to kill their desire to think outside the box. When they tell you this is my way of doing it and you say well that's the wrong way they immediatley stop trying to do it their way and start searching for the best way to please you after a while. That's what I've seen in this group. Allison and Jill both are desparately seeking the answers that will open the praise door from IV instead of seeking internal self-praise. Since she has set herself up as the judge of whether they are right they now look to please her instead of trusting their judgement. Now if she wanted to teach the lesson in a different way so they would come to the conclusion she wanted them to come to on their own their are ways she could have designed the lesson such that they would have ended up learning what she wanted them to learn without being told they were wrong and thus losing trust in themselves. That's why I don't trust in IV's life coaching skills. She's created little co-dependent disiples not independent women capable of living on their own.   Top

OklaBlue 1244 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest" 12-28-05, 10:49 AM (EST) 20. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" Co-dependent disciples...hmmm. Maybe that is why Jill has posted such glowing praise of Iyanla on her website. Allison doesn't have a website at the moment...but probably did the same.   Top

AshLanie 895 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 12-28-05, 10:57 AM (EST) 21. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" >Co-dependent disciples...hmmm. Maybe that is >why Jill has posted such >glowing praise of Iyanla on >her website. Allison doesn't >have a website at the >moment...but probably did the same. > Oh, what's Jills web site addy? Thanks   Top

lavendarJ 37 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beauty Pageant Celebrity Judge" 12-28-05, 06:56 PM (EST) 22. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" I actually thought that the exercise that Iyanla did with Jill and the "SOS" things was pretty eye opening for her. I liked it because I think it delivered a simple message, re-think the way you think and examine how you prioritze what you really need to survive versus existing. I think it is a good exercise because it doesn't need to be a right or wrong issue and that instead, the idea is to explore why you made the choices you made and evaluating them up against what the choices you did not make or the things you did not even consider .... that' just me   Top

Baxtera 923 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 12-29-05, 10:25 AM (EST) 23. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" See the issue I have is IV is always right and the client always has to agree with what IV would have chosen. As a teacher if her goal was to get Jill to pick certain items so should would understand certain outcomes than the exercise should have been designed so Jill could see the immediate cause and effect of her choices vs. having IV evaluate her choices for her. I realize there was a time factor but there are ways it could have been done in which Jill could have experienced the cause/effect of her choices immediataly instead of having to rely on IV's evaluation of her choices thus putting Jill in the position of learner/evaluator instead of how do I pick the items that will please IV. The issue isn't giving exercises the issue is exercises which are designed to make the client rely on the life coach to evaluate their decisions as being good or bad. The exercises should be designed so the client can see for themselves without being judged by the life coach such that they learn to look for outcomes and not wait for feedback from external judges.   Top

Labyrinth 1248 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest" 12-29-05, 11:03 AM (EST) 24. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" >I would love to hear from >bonefide LC's regarding the exercises. ROFLMAO! Sorry - but being an LC is not "bonafide" in any sort of the word. It's a self made title by a couple of women who want to go out and become paid public speakers based upon personal experiences. Just a rant - these women have no certification, training, licensure or anything that amounts to being legit.   Top

GoodnightLittleBear 461 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Daytime Soap Guest Star" 12-29-05, 04:21 PM (EST) 25. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" LAST EDITED ON 12-29-05 AT 04:29 PM (EST) It's a good thing that the women are not paying these "life coaches". You know they get paid an arm and a leg for creating little index card and construction paper exercises ala Capt Kangaroo. I am surprised that none of the women have told Rhonda or Ilyana to shove it. I know if I were Lisa and was made to go out in public dressed as a baby, I would have decked Rhonda. Of course I do not mean that literally but I do not think public humiliation is therapeutic whatsoever and would tell Rhonda to stick it.   Top

Baxtera 923 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 12-29-05, 05:16 PM (EST) 26. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" They do at any point have the right to refuse it just means they'd have to leave. As much as I really don't like Lisa I thought there were plenty of other more powerful and less humilating ways to get the point across to Lisa and maintain the integrity of the process. As you can see from the rest of what's happened it didn't work with Lisa it was just a rating grabbing attempt by Rhonda. That being said, Lisa seems the type that came to get the attentions she's gotten here and like Allsion they'll be prying her cold fingers from the door when it's time to go. That's why I've really come to believe these life coaches are more game show hosts than LC's this season.   Top

bigbutt 1 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "American Cancer Society Spokesperson" 12-29-05, 10:08 PM (EST) 27. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" I have to agree with the previous poster's assessment of the LC's this season. "Game show hosts" - perfect. They sure as heck aren't changing any lives with any effective, lasting lessons!! The term "Life Coach" is a joke to me anyway.   Top

OklaBlue 1244 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest" 12-30-05, 04:23 PM (EST) 28. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" LAST EDITED ON 01-05-06 AT 03:28 PM (EST) They might be "certified" by their own programs/training courses. ---- Here's a good one: FREE 6 part online course about life coaching: http://www.lifecoachingstudio.com/become.htm   Top

Baxtera 923 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 01-04-06, 08:09 AM (EST) 29. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" Certified might be a good word for it or is it certifiable I'm looking for? When IV gets up there and starts screaming to the universe instead of telling the women to seek financial planning help when they don't hanlde their money well I will say I do look for the little men in the white coats to come. There is a time and a place for spiritual aide and help. If these women had come seeking only spiritual guidence then they got what they came for with IV scream to the bushes to they might have something to offer you too. However, the SO house is also supposed to offer proffessional advise that goes beyond Universe Screaming 101.   Top

MovinOnUp 28 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beauty Pageant Celebrity Judge" 01-04-06, 05:38 PM (EST) 30. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" No, they are not real life, but then again living in a multi-million dollar mansion with 5 other women, no job and multiple cameras following your every move isn't all that real-life either. There is a "manufactured" element to the exercises you see because it is TV. Most coaches do not use exercises like these to coach clients. These exercises are to add a visual element to the show that the producers believe it must have. While some visual is necessary, TV execs grossly underestimate their audience (especially THIS audience). They think things like Jill's experts make bad TV and baby dresses and doll houses are GREAT. Too bad. As for what the women are supposed to get from the exercises...like with most coaching sessions, the woman really determines what she gets and where it goes. The coach may have an idea of where they think the woman needs to work and an intention for the end result but the woman typically determines how they get there. What many seem to be interpreting as "being made wrong," is often about causing a woman to stretch and get maximum benefit from the exercise they are doing. The reality is that there is no right or wrong...how you handle the issue is the issue. Many of the exercises work on several different levels and may be intended to get a response rather than a result (awareness, opening, even anger)...these results typically create an opening for the next place the coach is headed. Just some thoughts to ponder.   Top

Baxtera 923 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 01-04-06, 07:12 PM (EST) 31. "RE: These exercises are NOT real life!" I think your point about underestimating the audience is appropriate and important. Sadly I get nothing but disgust from watching them dress Lisa up like a baby ( I changed the channel and flipped back until it was done) or humiliating TJ. I watched TJ because as a teacher it bothers me that people are still so uneducated in this day and age about how to work with clients who have ADHD. In previous years I did think they had exercises that not only worked for their clients but made me the viewer at home think and ponder as well. The only exercises that have been in that ball park this season really have been Jill's exercises around letting go and guess what they all were done by outside consultants. As much as I don't like Lisa dressing her up in a child's dress and making her go out in public was a game show routine not an exercise designed to truly help her. Having her housemates treat her like a baby distracted from their time to work on their issues. Having her play with children while dressed as a baby, also a waste of time that could have been used for work to try and bring her around or for tossing her but out. (No I didn't watch it all but I did read the updates.) It's become a sad joke that starting over is the reality gong show.   Top

flexy633 234 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star" 01-05-06, 01:41 AM (EST) 32. "Life Coaching" It bothers me when people say that "life coaching" is a joke or not a "real career." Please take a look at this site if you are interested in learning further on what REAL life coaches do in order to become certified. No, there is no degree needed or special training, but it is highly recommended if you want to become certified by this organization. Plus, any job paying you $800-$1,000 per month for one client isn't much of a joke, in my opinion. http://www.coachfederation.org/eweb/   Top

OklaBlue 1244 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest" 01-05-06, 08:04 AM (EST) 33. "RE: Life Coaching" LAST EDITED ON 01-05-06 AT 10:37 AM (EST) No...more like a hip fad. Why pay 6 to 10 times what you would pay for a real professional psychologist or psychiatrist? Why pay at all when a lot of what the coaches do is available free? It sounds all too high schoolish, and created for those who either don't have a family support system or friends or for those who are looking for a quick fix no matter the cost. Not saying LC's don't work for people. Anyone would want a cheerleader to boost them along and help clarify their thoughts about life or career. "no degree needed or special training, but it is highly recommended" .. why would you want to go to this coach? You can read more about these LC's and U Santa Monica program, and individual philosophy on these threads (and on Iyanla and Rhonda websites): http://community.realitytvworld.com/boards/DCForumID91/797.shtml or http://community.realitytvworld.com/boards/DCForumID91/773.shtml I went to the above mentioned website for ICF and looked through some of the programs. Most of this coaching seems to be directed at short term career counseling, and value definition. "assists clients in gaining clarity and creating the required physiological shift in thinking for faster positive change. Negative self-talk is replaced with positive thoughts, words and actions." This type of counseling is available at most college counseling offices free, or at job training offices like the unemployment offices around the country. Some of the more in-depth counseling would go beyond career into life values, etc. The training courses are very short term. And they do not put the cost up front in their website. Here's another place to check, a FREE 6 week online course about life coaching: http://www.lifecoachingstudio.com/become.htm IMO they are overpaid wanna-be Dr. Phil's, albeit some have great intentions.   Top

pegasustt 168 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson" 01-05-06, 01:46 PM (EST) 36. "RE: Life Coaching" The therapist i'm seeing calls her approach "Reality Therapy" I have seen lots of therapist's in my life time and this one has helped me the most. When I told her about SO show, and told her about the life coaches she said that she is one too. TT   Top

Baxtera 923 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 01-05-06, 08:36 AM (EST) 34. "RE: Life Coaching" People pay money for all kinds of services whether they need them or not and they are certainly entitled to do with their money as they choose. However, as another poster pointed out career counseling is readily available but it would be helpful if more people knew where to start. If you go to your local library, unemployment office (even if you've never worked or are currently working they will help you), local college, etc. there are plenty of resources available to start the process of finding a new career. Some of those resources do provide job coaches who will help you and provide you with coaching along with basic resources. As for counseling I think you have to walk a careful path based on your needs and what you are seeking as a potential outcome. If you are seeking to truly work through emotional issues someone who has the appropriate credentials and professional experience is essesntial. There are low cost alternatives for people, you don't have to humiliate yourself on tv to find them. If you are seeking spiritual guidence there are plenty of legit resources for that too. If you truly want to spend $800-1000 dollars to have someone who lacks the actual training to be a pychiatrist then it is a personal choice. I could see working with a trainer in a specific tough to get into field for that kind of money who could guarentee me contacts and opportunities that I wouldn't otherwise have. Other than that I must just have money to burn that I don't feel like donating to a more worthy use.   Top

OklaBlue 1244 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest" 01-05-06, 08:55 AM (EST) 35. "RE: Life Coaching" LAST EDITED ON 01-05-06 AT 08:56 AM (EST) "If you go to your local library, unemployment office (even if you've never worked or are currently working they will help you), local college, etc. there are plenty of resources available to start the process of finding a new career. Some of those resources do provide job coaches who will help you and provide you with coaching along with basic resources. As for counseling I think you have to walk a careful path based on your needs and what you are seeking as a potential outcome. If you are seeking to truly work through emotional issues someone who has the appropriate credentials and professional experience is essesntial. There are low cost alternatives for people, you don't have to humiliate yourself on tv to find them. If you are seeking spiritual guidence there are plenty of legit resources for that too." Nice post Baxtera. I think it should be used as a disclaimer on the SO program!   Top

flexy633 234 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star" 01-06-06, 02:53 PM (EST) 37. "RE: Life Coaching" LAST EDITED ON 01-06-06 AT 02:56 PM (EST) Life coaches are NOT therapists, that is the key. This is why Dr. Stan is on the show as well. In fact, many of these women on the show shouldn't even be going to a Life Coach. They need intense therapy with a licensed therapist. There are many coaches out there that have helped people overcome obstacles and helped them achieve their goals. But, they are dealing with "normal" people who do not have the psychological issues that you see on Starting Over. When you feel that you cannot help someone, you are supposed to refer them to a therapist and not continue coaching them. Life coaching is new, so no wonder it is laughed at. Just like when personal trainers first came on the scene. People thought, "Oh, brother. I'm going to pay $50/hour to have someone help me work out???" Yep, and people do it now in great numbers. They claim they can't workout without their personal trainer! In fact, I made the best results when I worked with a personal trainer rather than working out on my own. Sometimes you need someone to push you, ask the right questions, get you on track. That is what Life Coaching is all about. It's no different than going to a personal trainer for your body. Forgot to mention that yes, these free courses do exist. It is the same for becoming a personal trainer. However, if you really want to make it in this field, it's recommended that you attend the certified schools listed on the IFA website. And you must do that in order to become certified by the IFA. I would NOT attend a program that is free and not certified by an organization such as IFA.   Top

Baxtera 923 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent" 01-06-06, 03:32 PM (EST) 38. "RE: Life Coaching" Just like with personal trainers there are personal trainers and personal trainers. Some will help you meet your goals and some will tell you what you want to hear and charge you big bucks to hear it. The other key is that the honorable ones will get someone they know who can't afford it on a program that they can they sustain on their own a jump start if you will so they can learn what to do appropriately and then be able to continue the process on their own. The people who can afford a private trainer full time and choose to spend their money that way have the right to make that choice. I'm very heartened when I see trainers who understand and respect the needs and financial realities of their clients and respect that. I think a similiar correlation exists in life coaching. There are people who can afford to go and explore the world and find themselves and seek gurus and self-help experts. Then there are others who need a jump start that will leave them with a path to follow and access to resources that they can afford and continue to access. To me an ethical person would be one who would recognize clients who are in the jump start mode and not take everything they have and leave them with nothing or nowhere to go. Sadly I think several of the SO graduates where sent in mid jump out into the world without practical skills to see them through but man can they yell to the universe.   Top

flexy633 234 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Network TV Show Guest Star" 01-06-06, 04:36 PM (EST) 39. "RE: Life Coaching" LAST EDITED ON 01-06-06 AT 06:27 PM (EST) I completely agree with everything you said. You are right, there are people who just need a jump start and can then, handle things from there if given the correct tools. I didn't keep my personal trainer forever. It was hard for me to tell him that I didn't need him anymore and wanted to workout alone with the tools he gave me. But, he thought I was ready and had learned enough to do it on my own. You can't force someone to say on a program, a lot comes from within. Heck, if I had the money, I would definitely hire a Life Coach or Career Coach in a minute! A REAL Life Coach - NOT IV or Rhonda. IMO, they are NOT true life coaches and are trying act like therapists. I checked into a Life Coach school and participated in the 1 hour free phone call to see if the school was right for me. The gentleman on the phone did NOT care one bit for Starting Over, but said he hopes that this will not give Life Coaches a bad name. Plus, real life coaches do not put women through those silly and humilating exercises that they do on the show. I see on this forum that there are a few people who are down on life coaches and think therapy is better. Therapy has its place if you have deep issues like Allison, TJ, and Jill. Jessica was fine with a Life Coach and didn't need full blown therapy, in my opinion. Therapy tends to deal with the past whereas Life Coaching is supposed to be more goal-oriented and looking toward the future. Also, there are therapists that work hand in hand with Life Coaches and the client, like Dr. Stan does on the show.   Top

Remove

Lobby | Topics | Previous Topic | Next Topic

Select another forum Lobby The Amazing Race Message Board Forums (Conference)   |--The Amazing Race Fanatics Forum (Protected)   |--The Amazing Race Basher Forum (Protected)   |--The Amazing Race Spoiler/Speculation Forum (Protected) American Idol Message Board Forums (Conference)   |--American Idol General Discussion Forum (Protected)   |--American Idol Individual Contestant and Judge Discussion Forum (Protected) Big Brother Message Board Forums (Conference)   |--Big Brother Fanatic Forum (Protected)   |--Big Brother Bashers Forum (Protected)   |--Big Brother Live Feed Updates And Spoilers (Protected) Survivor Message Board Forums (Conference)   |--Survivor Fanatic Forum (Protected)   |--Survivor Basher Forum (Protected)   |--Survivor Spoilers Forum (Protected)   |--Survivor Games Forum (Protected) Other Reality TV Shows (Conference)   |--The Bachelor / The Bachelorette Forum (Protected)   |--Dancing with the Stars Forum (Protected)   |--Other Reality TV Shows Forum (Protected) Off Topic (Conference)   |--The Help Forum (Protected)   |--Off-Topic Forum (Protected)