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PLEASE NOTE: The Reality TV World Message Boards are filled with desperate
attention-seekers pretending to be one big happy PG/PG13-rated family. Don't
be fooled. Trying to get everyone to agree with you is like herding cats,
but intolerance for other viewpoints is NOT welcome and respect for other
posters IS required at all times. Jump in and play, and you'll soon find out
how easy it is to fit in, but save your drama for your mama. All members are
encouraged to read the
complete guidelines.
As entertainment critic Roger
Ebert once said, "If you disagree with something I write, tell me so, argue
with me, correct me--but don't tell me to shut up. That's not the American way."
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"The Amazing Bacon"
bacon 2824 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Howard Stern Show Guest"
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06-07-02, 04:10 PM (EST)
 
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"The Amazing Bacon" |
I'm more of a David Letterman fan, but I'm going to completely rip-off a great bit that was started by Johnny Carson. Here goes..*puts envelope #1 to his head* The answer: Magic Johnson...John Stockton...Danny and Oswald. *opens up envelope* Name 4 people who are good at ball handling.
*puts envelope #2 to his head* The answer: My mother's purse and "The Gutsy Grannies".
*Opens up envelope* Name three old bags
*puts envelope #3 to his head* The answer: A 100 year old woman, William "the refridgerator" Perry, and a man in a coma.
*opens up envelope* Name the only three people Tara and Wil could outrun.
*Puts envelope #4 to his head* The answer: E-mail, a chat room, and a late-night phone hotline.
*open up envelope* Name every place you can think of where Gary and Dave have the best chance of losing their virginity.
*Puts the 5th and final envelope to his head* The answer: A mosquito bite, Donald Trump, and Tara.
*opens up envelope* Name something that'll make you itch, someone who is really rich, and someone who's a major b!tch.
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SkyRaider 1301 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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06-07-02, 09:07 PM (EST)
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1. "RE: The Amazing Bacon" |
LOL! Excellent, you Amazin' Bacon, you!
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katem 3315 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
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06-08-02, 12:07 PM (EST)
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2. "The Amazing Tocino !!!!!" |
>*puts envelope #2 to his head*
>The answer: My mother's purse
>and "The Gutsy Grannies".
>
>
>*Opens up envelope* Name three old
>bags
>
>
>*puts envelope #3 to his head*
>The answer: A 100 year
>old woman, William "the refridgerator"
>Perry, and a man in
>a coma.
>
>
>*opens up envelope* Name the only
>three people Tara and Wil
>could outrun.
>
>
>*Puts envelope #4 to his head*
>The answer: E-mail, a chat
>room, and a late-night phone
>hotline.
>
>
>*open up envelope* Name every place
>you can think of where
>Gary and Dave have the
>best chance of losing their
>virginity.
>
>
>*Puts the 5th and final envelope
>to his head* The answer:
>A mosquito bite, Donald Trump,
>and Tara.
>
>
>*opens up envelope* Name something that'll
>make you itch, someone who
>is really rich, and someone
>who's a major b!tch. LOL Tocino, they were very funny !!!!
Do it again, do it again 
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JeffGator 1401 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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06-09-02, 12:51 PM (EST)
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4. "RE: The Amazing Bacon" |
lol bacon, these were freakin' hilarious!! I don't know which one I enjoyed the most but they all had me laughing out loud. By the way, I'm a David Letterman fan too
  
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CSHS79 908 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
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06-10-02, 02:06 PM (EST)
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5. "RE: The Amazing Bacon" |
LAST EDITED ON 06-10-02 AT 02:52 PM (EST)Jeff:One question,why didn't you defend Gary & Dave? Remember how mad you got at me for making a similar joke and yet
bacon can do the same thing and you just laugh. What's up with that? I'm only asking you to be consistent,so why didn't you come to their defense this time?
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bacon 2824 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Howard Stern Show Guest"
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06-10-02, 09:30 PM (EST)
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7. "RE: The Amazing Bacon" |
Aren't you the same person who told me that my "Paige making grilled cheese sandwhiches for Blake would win the race for em" bit was stupid and that i should think before i post? Dude, lighten up!
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Bebo 21083 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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06-11-02, 12:36 PM (EST)
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9. "RE: The Amazing Bacon" |
Can't the guy make a general, brief compliment to someone posting something funny without it turning into a big issue? Thought that horse had already been beaten dead.And can't we have one post for humor on a board that's not hijacked? We used to be able to poke fun at things on this board without it becoming a major issue. Rude, snotty, mean, horrible, nasty, witch, yadda yadda yadda...
 There are 10 kinds of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't. Carolina Hurricanes - Eastern Conference Champions
Bedeviled NJ, nabbed the Habs, and raked the Leafs!
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JeffGator 1401 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
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06-11-02, 02:56 PM (EST)
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10. "RE: The Amazing Bacon" |
first of all, your comments were not similar in my opinion, but regardless--why on earth are you bringing this up again? i'm really getting sick of it. You keep "attacking" me in different threads and hijacking them. If you want to ask me a question then just email me instead of publicly displaying everything. You've embarrassed me, bacon, and yourself. There are millions of other topics and things going on, on this board to concern yourself in.
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bacon 2824 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Howard Stern Show Guest"
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06-12-02, 09:42 PM (EST)
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15. "You have angered BACON!" |
Less about "blah blah blah...i want consistancy...blah blah blah" and more about "Bacon is a genius...blah blah blah".
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bacon 2824 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Howard Stern Show Guest"
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06-12-02, 10:10 PM (EST)
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18. "RE: You have angered BACON!" |
Yes! Someone admits it! Don't worry, JG. Since you admitted i'm a genius you can count on me to have your back. And wow, my post has eventually led to a personal warning from the people who run this site. I am truly honored! Is there no limit to my brilliance? It's all about the comedy and controversy for me.
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Bebo 21083 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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06-13-02, 08:17 AM (EST)
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19. "RE: You have angered BACON!" |
Is there no limit to my brilliance? Not that I've seen. Bacon is a genius, blah blah blah. I also happen to think our blue men are geniuses, blah blah blah. Rude, snotty, mean, horrible, nasty, witch, yadda yadda yadda...
There are 10 kinds of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't. Carolina Hurricanes - Eastern Conference Champions
Bedeviled NJ, nabbed the Habs, and raked the Leafs!
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sleeeve 3456 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Car Show Celebrity"
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06-12-02, 09:47 PM (EST)
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16. "Enough Already" |
LAST EDITED ON 06-12-02 AT 09:50 PM (EST)>But is what I was asking
>so hard to do--that is
>be consistent? There are two issues here. The first of which is that I told you to stop this vendetta, CSHS79... Jeff has apologized for hurting you in a post a long time ago, yet you continue to bash him. This is a violation of the Zero Tolerance Policy at this site... If you feel that another board member is treating you unfairly, you have two and only two options. First, approach the person via private message or e-mail... it's possible that they said something to hurt you unintentionally. Second, hit the ALERT button, and allow the moderators to handle it. If you choose to post comments like the one above, your account probably won't last long at this site. The second issue is that Jeff was also warned for his actions in bashing you... this isn't a one-sided deal... you were both told that you bashed each other and that it was a violation of the ZTP... Jeff has responded by apologizing and trying to make things right... that includes not bashing other posters, even if it means that he isn't responding even-handedly. To be honest, everyone on this site (including myself) have said things that they wished they could take back, later... the true test of an apology is whether the person learns from their mistakes, or continues to harp on the same issues. If you are still confused about the ZTP, feel free to e-mail any of the four moderators or ask questions in the Help Forum, and we'll be happy to try to clarify any issues. Oh... and Bacon is a genius...blah blah blah. 
You never know what might be up my sleeeve... 
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CSHS79 908 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
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06-13-02, 03:02 PM (EST)
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21. "RE: Enough Already" |
I was simply clarifying things since he appeared to be playing favorites as to who can say what about a contestant. Secondly it was I who apologized first and he did only after some nudging.If you look above you will also see were I said I tried to email him the question but it wouldn't go thru for some reason.Since the rules have been made clear hopefully they'll be abided by by all of us.
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Bebo 21083 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
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06-10-02, 02:27 PM (EST)
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6. "RE: The Amazing Bacon" |
Woohoo, Bacon! It's nice to see that we can still have fun, even after the season is over.Keep up the jokes! Rude, snotty, mean, horrible, nasty, witch, yadda yadda yadda...
There are 10 kinds of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't. Carolina Hurricanes - Eastern Conference Champions
Bedeviled NJ, nabbed the Habs, and raked the Leafs!
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CSHS79 908 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
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06-17-02, 09:44 AM (EST)
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25. "RE: The Amazing Bacon" |
Since it is obvious no one cares about the answer
or even commenting on the topic let this be the
we hear jokes about virginity.
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