Friday, November 18, 2005
Forgiveness and Lisa Makes More Jewelry
The episode begins with Lisa showing Jill the jewelry she made for the assignment. She is not happy with the quality of her work, and was up until 4AM working on the necklaces. Jill has an appointment at the hospital to discuss financial options for her surgery.The women gather for group, and Lisa tells them she is sorry for lashing out at them yesterday. She says she feels ashamed of herself. Dr. Stan arrives to run the group, and says that today's group is about forgiveness. He asks the women how they handle forgiveness and whether it is easy for them to forgive. Jill says she is willing to forgive friends, but has trouble forgiving her family. Allison says she never allows herself to feel the anger over being hurt by someone, so she can't get to the forgiveness. She tends to just blame herself when anyone hurts her. Lisa says she is quick to forgive without first feeling the feelings of anger. Jessica says she was raised to be forgiving, but tends to build evidence against a person after they've hurt her once. Stan tells them that forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. He brings out an olive branch, which is a symbol of peace/forgiveness, and lays it on the table. He tells the women to write a letter of forgiveness to their parent/s for a forgiveness ceremony that Rhonda is going to hold this evening. Group is adjourned.
Dr. Stan and TJ meet. He asks her how she is connecting in the house, and TJ says she is having trouble. Christina thinks she doesn't listen, and she is having problems with Jessica and Allison as well. Stan says he has an exercise for her to help her connect. Then he brings in 4 kids for TJ to babysitfor the afternoon. He tells TJ that she is to have lunch with them, play games, read a story, etc. TJ immediately asks the children for a hug, and they all hug her.
Allison works on her forgiveness letter to her father. She says she is having a hard time forgiving him.
Rhonda and Lisa meet and Lisa shows Rhonda the necklaces she made. Lisa is not happy wih them at all because she thinks they are not good enough quality to sell. Rhonda asks her if she has prepared invoices for the jewelry, and Lisa says she hasn't. Then Lisa and Rhonda go watch the video of the appointments Lisa had with the shop owners to make sure that Lisa has fulfilled the order she promised. As they watch Lisa meeting with each shop owner, Lisa realizes that she was lying to all of them and that the had no intention of filling the orders she took from them that day. She still doesn't have the orders completed even after staying up all night working on them, and Rhonda is disappointed that Lisa is so unprepared.
Jessica works on her forgiveness letter to her father. She is trying to forgive him for the way he behaved after her mother's death. TJ is outside with the kids. They are running all over the place, and TJ doesn't seem to have much control over the situation.
Rhonda and Lisa continue their discussion. Rhonda tells her she has to deliver the necklaces she made to the shop owners today, and that she also has another order for Lisa: Rhonda wants 25 more necklaces by tomorrow. She asks Lisa if she can do it, and Lisa looks anxious--doesn't really answer...
Jill goes to Live View Hospital to find out about financial aid for her surgery. She finds out that she qualifies for Medi-Cal through the ATP program (Aid To Pay). Jill needs a note from a doctor before getting the financing, and decides to go for a second opinion regarding her surgery.
The kids are now running through the house playing, and TJ has lost all control. She says they are not listening to her and she feels a little overwhelmed.
Lisa goes to the jewelry stores to give them her necklaces. Things go well at the first store, but at the second store, the shop owner is a little terse with her at first, and says she is late in her delivery... Also, one of the necklaces is broken, so she can only give him 4 of the 5 she promised.
Jill goes to Northridge Hospital for the second opinion. The doctor there tells her there are concerns about having the surgery now. He says she should lose weight and be in a better emotional state before she has surgery... Christina picks Jill up from the hospital and Jill tells her about the appointment. She says the doctor said he wants to do an ultrasound and find out where the fibroid is coming from... He says only if it is coming from her ovary would he recommend surgery right now. Jill is elated that she doesn't immediately have to have the surgery, and that the doctor told her there many be other options.
TJ reads a story to the kids, but they're not really that into it. Lisa tries to take a nap, and Allison feels that Lisa doesn't really have a clue about what s going on.
Stan returns and the children leave. Then he and TJ meet to discuss the experience she had babysitting. Stan says TJ tried hard, and he gives her an A for effort. He says, however, that TJ came on too strong when she immediately asked the kids to hug her. He said that is uncomfortable for the kids, and too aggressive. He says she needed to relax and let the kids com to her. He relates the way she interacted with the kids with the problems she has in connecting with people. She comes on too strong with others, and intimidates people that way.
Rhonda and Lisa meet to talk about her day delivering the necklaces. Lisa tells her how one of the charms fell off of the necklaces, and Rhonda asks her if, after that happened, she checked the other necklaces before going to the next store. Lisa says she didn't. Rhonda asks her if she (Lisa) always needs to be checked/watched, and Lisa starts crying. She says she is trying, and Rhonda says Lisa is becoming defensive. She tells Lisa she doesn't buy her tears or her manipulations. She asks Lisa what she wants from the SO house, and Lisa says she doesn't want everything to be such an effort for her. Rhonda says things are going to be challenging for a long time for Lisa until she grows a backbone. Lisa says it's hard to change old habits. Rhonda says that Lisa is acting like the SO house is against her and that she is argumentative and defensive. She asks Lisa what she, as her life coach, is supposed to do when Lisa acts that way. Lisa is crying and she tells Rhonda she wants to ask for help now. Rhonda tells her she must be willing to do the work to grow up. She tells Lisa she is looking for to seeing the 'grown up Lisa'.
TJ works on her forgiveness letter, and Lisa tells Jessica about the meeting she had with Rhonda. She says Rhonda told also told her that if she remains childish, she will never get to experience giving/receiving love. Lisa says she can't run away from the house, and that she will never get the things she wants.
The women meet outside for the forgiveness ceremony with Rhonda. Rhonda says that forgiveness happens in layers. It is something you must do over and over again. She says that when we let go of bitterness and resentment, it sets us free. Then she says each woman will read her letter and then decide whether to send the letter or burn it. They all read their letters (they only show clips of each woman reading). They are all very touching, especially Allison's letter. Allison cries as she talks about her father's drunken rages, he didn't realize how badly he hurt her, and she says she forgives him. Lisa's letter, however, is accusatory and doesn't sound very forgiving. Rhonda says Lisa just doesn't 'get it'. All the women, except Lisa, decide to mail the letter instead of burning it. Lisa burns hers.
After the ceremony, Lisa goes to work on the 25 necklaces Rhonda wants by tomorrow. She says she wants to give up, and asks TJ if she should just call Rhonda and tell her she can't do it. TJ tells her not to call Rhonda, and not to give up. Jessica is worried that Lisa is going to give up on the SO house, and then the house will give up on her. Lisa says the act of making these necklaces is killing her.
Preview for next week: Allison is pushed to a place she doesn't want to go. TJ has a breakdown. Christina reveals more about her secret past. And there's a Board of Review so stunning it makes Starting Over history and will change the house forever!
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