LAST EDITED ON 10-29-03 AT 10:28 AM (EST)LAST EDITED ON 10-28-03 AT 11:58 PM (EST)
What the ???
State of the Spoiling? Total disarray.
I’ve been combing the spoiler boards for vital information, and you people are unceasingly obsessed over stupid things like ghosts and challenges and revived castaways and other drivel such as lies, regrets and twists. Not one thread devoted to the important questions that hover over Survivor, E-piss-ode Seven Eh?.
Questions such as:
1. What will Rupert do with Jon’s body parts, and will this affect “Everybody Loves Rupert of the Jungle,” his mid-season replacement CBS sitcom?
2. Wha waeh twapicaw disees is swowy tuning Chwista into a sooba-uman poka-dobbed baw ub snot?
3. Do all Joisey girls swallow as well as Michelle?
4. Since Darrah has the chest of a 14-year-old boy, what were they blurring?
5. Where, exactly, are Osten’s testicles?
Maybe these questions are only important to me. Maybe Big Lies and Big Twists and Big Regrets are interesting to some of you. Maybe they shouldn’t let me wander away from Bashers. I will try to control myself. But no promises.
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Much of this week’s discussion has been in The G/D/M Challenge, which some purists probably regard as The G’ddamn Challenge.
In this thread, we attempt to unravel the mysteries of the three-cage monte. Who’s tied to what, and why are they digging holes? There are vidcaps galore. The consensus is that the Post-Ghosties win the challenge, and some re-enter the game. But who, how many and can they still win the million bucks? What the ??? is going on?!?
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Once you’ve been driven insane in that thread, you might want to click on over to Returning Winners? where our very own bad egg, Veruca Salt, has pirated some info from TDT and Survivor Phoenix. These other sites are saying that the Ghosties get one shot at returning. The Ghosties will win the bamboo cage match event, forcing both Drake and Morgan to eliminate a player. The Ghosties then elect two players for revival. Our own posters follow up with speculation about who the ghosts vote back into the game. Burton and Lillian are the apparent choices. This thread may help to restore your sanity, but it will not restore Nicole’s underwear.
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When you’ve reached this point of the SOTS, you are well into Big Regret.
Shout M----F----!!, which can only mean “MistoFleas!!”
Misto’s epic Big Lie, Big Twist, Big Regret is now in it’s fourth edition, and the discussion has currently centered around Osten, and if his weakness is an act, making him the Big Liar. Or if he actually quits the game, making that the Big Regret. Of course, there is also an entertaining notion that Rupert Boneham is actually British actor Robbie Coltrane (Harry Potter’s Hagrid). My own opinion: The big lie is that Osten has testicles. Misto’s thread has links back to the previous epics, sort of like the Harry Potter books. Can’t wait to see if Nicole Kidman plays Misto in the movie.
Also in that thread is Jeffy’s announcement that the Big Regret happens this week. He was on the Ellen Degenerate Show Tuesday and spake thusly:
Ellen: So, now tell me about what's going with Survivor right now?
Jeff: Survivor is ... We're out in the Pearl Islands. The whole theme this season is piracy and this week is ... if you are a Survivor fan, a huge week. Because it's a really big twist and it sort of changes the game. It seems so silly sometimes to be talking about it with such reverence, but, you know, it's a Reality show and we put in a really cool twist this time. And there's a guy that does something. You know, this is a show about human nature and about how you react in stressful situations.
Ellen: Yes.
Jeff: And there's a guy this week that, that ... something happens that I think they're going to regret for a long, long time.
Ellen: Really?
Jeff: Yeah. And, I think it's one of those things, when you watch the show and you're seeing real people make decisions that, that may, that may haunt them for a while.
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Aethelstan has moved beyond the cage (thinking outside the box?) to speculate on the Boot of the week. Lots of reasons to think Shawn, Osten and Ryno are in trouble, but who really knows if anyone gets booted this week? Edited to add this: The Early Show promises to have the latest castoff. Of course, that could just be some cut and paste copy from every Friday's Early Show listing. Or they could have two folks.
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Devious Weasel has raised the question of whether this “Very Special Episode” covers three days, or six days. The other basic question: If there is a tribal council at the end of Part 1, is it really a two-part episode? Click here if you aren’t already exhausted.
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If you’ve done enough digging, and still haven’t escaped the cage, set your mind on See BS Misdirection Ep7 “What the…?”
This is where those brilliant network minds write things like this:
It's the first of a two-part episode full of surprises and revelations!
The Survivors thought they were ready for anything. But, when the twist to beat all twists takes them by surprise, they can do little but shudder as they learn the curse of SURVIVOR: PEARL ISLANDS.
A castaway makes a monumental decision.
The twist? Uh huh, gotcha. The monumental decision? Could be that Osten drops out, could be Andrew starts planning where to build a statue to his own brilliance. Could be Lil comes back into the game, and chooses to be a Drake (or a pelican.)
As for the Curse of the Pearl Islands, there is some other interesting info in that thread.
KlicK tells us that in Panama there is a legend of an entity called Tulivieja. She is so much a part of the culture that even today, children are given a mate (pronounced ma-tae), a charm made of red ribbon and coco bean dipped in gold to keep her away. Of course there are slight variations in the story, but for the most part the legend states that once way back in time, the spirits and the mortals could live together, see each other and recognize each other. Poster 1derfool also posted this in another thread, and somehow the full moon plays into this as well, and there was a full moon when these days were being filmed. Kudos to both for uncovering just the sort of native hoodoo that MB loves to exploit. More on the lore can be found here.
As for me, keep your ma-tae. I need a mai-tai right about now.
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Esquire has raised the question Can the Ghost Tribe win a challenge? and points out that the Ghosties have two old ladies, two weak young ladies, Burton and tent pole Ryan, who can at least slip through the bars in the cage. Of course, jaded veterans know any tribe can win any challenge… if MB decides they will.
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Bebekid looks ahead to Part II of the Very Special Survivor, with "Part 2: One tribe hosts a wedding", another mind-boggling thread that pivots from a glorified merge to a Panamanian wedding party to Michelle’s sister’s actual wedding, to a couple of pelicans mating. The interesting words there seem to be “one tribe” which may indicate there is no merge yet.
Miscellaneous
Krautboy dips into the world of mathmatics with his Ep 6 Confessional Analysis. He uses a lot of big numbers (some higher than 7!) to tell us that Ryno is in big trouble. I don’t know what the hell he’s talking about, but he’s Krautboy, he’s smarter than me, he’s rarely if ever wrong, hence Ryno is toast.
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Krautboy keeps going, dissecting Ryan as a victim of the “twist?” PheonixMons joins in to deflate any serious validity to the idea that Ryan is leaving in episode 6.
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The preview video tag at the end of Ep 6 may have been superseded by the ghost tribe video, but props go out to Webby for his speedy delivery of the preview video caps. If nothing else, they verify the full moon. (No, not Darrah’s shower, but that was a full moon as well.)
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Markopolo is a godsend with his weekly Survivor Insider post. This week we learn that Trish was too busy for a post-boot interview the next day. And Christa has 45 bug bites in each sinus.
Long Term spoilers
Rupert fans, take note of the thread Mrs. Rupert flies to Panama where we learn that Laura Boneham goes south for the family visit, and returns the next day. Also flying into Panama are Lillian's husband, Christa’s fiancé, Darrah’s boyfriend, and Burton’s mom. Presumably there are more family members , yet unidentified. If Lili's husband visitst, she's back from the dead. If Burton’s mom visits, he probably returns to the game. Does anyone want to see them snuggle in the back seat?
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Raven is looking ahead with Post Ghost tribe Alliances which speculates on Andrew and Tijuana alliance and Sandra/Christa/Rupert alliances.
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Trish’s CBS Chat contained a few tidbits about Shawn’s possible victory, Sandra’s mean streak, and Trish’s own 22-day stay out there. What the ??? does she mean, 22 days? Stay tuned, I guess.
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Snewser. Nuff said. His checklist. His scorecard.
Hey, things change.
Be prepared for late updates, since we are dealing with the Very Special Episode from Hell.
These reality show contestants need a reality check!
SOTS is provided by SurvivorBlows.com as a service to our readers. The purpose of this post is to consolidate the threads in the Spoiler Forum pertaining to this week's episode. Feel free to reply to this post if you feel that a theory you support was not adequately represented in this message... Please use this thread for unified discussion of all topics as we approach the next episode.
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Seriously, I doubt he was born with any.
We really do have 
