The Newest NewsIt's a new day at the school, and the raunchy girls woke up with morning after hangovers. But in contrast with that of the weepy little girl, Russell, (add "Whiner" to his resume) ours were merry happy go lucky hangovers.
But still this was a day for rest and contemplation of our navels. So onto today's spoilers, supplied to you thru me from my reliable but *not-Russell source.
Spoiler #1: Phillip, our intrepid Federal Sewer Rat, will continue to be on the hunt for "intel" hidden in land crab holes. He has his ultra-secret spy interrogation device (that he made by hand out of ordinary stick, oooh the resourcefulness of real spys), a sharpened stick. And so far he has determined that most land crabs are liars. And then they scuttle away.
Spoiler #2: Sarita continues to lead from behind.
Spoiler #3: Mike's thoughts haven't turned to sex in two weeks, ever since he discovered the pleasures of Ralph's back fur. Something funny is going on there, I tell ya!
Spoiler #4: Stephanie is still planning the BIGGEST BLINDSIDE EVER!!!. After which she will swim to the ponderosa to be with her man.
Spoiler #5: Natalie steals Phillip's red Tidy Whiteys. The Hazmat team had to provide her with a sterile isolation suit, a special 10' pole, and a incineration fire barrel. To everyone's surprise, it was discovered that Phillip had nothing to hide, just a Ken Doll blank spot. No balls at all. He had given them up when he became a Special Shit shoveling agent so that when he was captured by an enemy bent on discovering the Nation's deepest secrets buried in our latrines, they he would be less susceptible to torture. For this sacrifice he received the second highest peace time honor the army can award, the Pooper Heart.
(* legal disclaimer.)
Tribal Art{Remember folks cut and paste "Because Spoiler to the stars, MissyPissy says so!" in your voting thread on spoilers. Don't let me down. I'm financing this spoiling gig out of my own pocket, and it's getting serious.}