Isle of Lunacy - Francesca finds that even at Redemption Island we have rules. The MB manifesto says that you’re given basic supplies and a ration of rice each day, but must otherwise fend for yourself. Francesca hopes that she’s able to start a fire with her flint. Meanwhile, deep in the mountains of North Carolina, Jane is sitting in her trailer, stroking the Pit Bull in her lap and muttering, “Hopes she can start a fire? I could strike the flint off my ovaries and git a spark if’n I still had them.” Back in the dark, Francesca muses that being on Recycle Island might be good for her game. Like I said, she’s in the dark.
Shell Shocked - At Overtipping, Rob is still held in awe by his tribe and is literally carried into camp on the shoulders of Andrea, Ashley and Natalie. He seems to be encased in the same giant egg last used by Lady Gaga at the Grammys. (C’mon, it’s all CBS… we share a Prop Department.) As Rob steps out of the egg and tosses his keys to the valet, he remarks that that was one of the wildest Tribal Councils that he’s ever attended. That includes the “Tribal Council” Saturday nights at the Mariano household when Ambuh dresses up like Jeff Probst, but with cleavage. Of course Phillip responds with, “Wild? You haven’t even dipped a toe into the crazy swamp I’m capable of. And by the way, my liege, I pledge to you by the power of Zeus, the values that I hold dear and the completely nebulous title of Former Federal Agent that you own my vote until I go to Recycle Island. That is, unless the voices in my head change the channel or I lick that Bufo alvarius toad again.”
This causes Rob to confessionalize about Phillip’s mental health status and the dangers of stressful government jobs. His tongue is firmly in cheek, because by Boston standards you’re not entitled to any mental problems unless the Red Sox lose the Series. But Phillip is running around in droopy mauve Fruit of the Looms and referring to himself in the third person, so that’s two out of three lemons on the Looney Toons Slot Machine.
Phillip adds fool to the fire by keeping up a running dialogue as he hunts for crabs in the forest. Realizing that they didn’t spring for the “Remote Island DirecTV Package”, Matt MadLibs his own Phillip the Crustacean Hunter commentary to the delight of Rob and the others. Out of earshot, Captain Underpants has some success. “Killed with a stone, baby!” crows Phillip.
Don’t Eat the Yellow Ants – Over at Zappa, Rooster has a crow that should go pro, but Russell is unimpressed, saying that Ralph “may be the dumbest player to play Survivor.” In confession, Russell pulls out his turntables and spits his rap: “You seen me play before. You know what you seen? You seen me finding idols. That’s what you seen. That’s how I play this game.” Jay-Z feels a ripple in the Force, but shrugs it off.
Meanwhile, Rooster is carrying himself some rocks. Brushing ants off his arm, he happens to reach into a tree stump and find the Hidden Immunity Idol. “Hot doggie” indeed.
I/R Challenge: Welcome to Downtown Detroit, AKA: The Smash and Grab – Jiffy asks for the Immunity Idol from Rooster, who responds with “I’ll get it back”. Dr. Jiffy asks Phillip how this makes him feel. Phillip responds, “I’ll outlast any man over there.” When asked if that boast applies to the women too, Phillip has to ask one of his other personalities how to process a play on words. Overtipping is called for delay of game.
The challenge designers give the tribe members’ brains a rest this week. The challenge involves each person swimming out to a platform, smashing a tile and retrieving a key. Five keys, three locks, one ball, two turtledoves, five tiles, no puzzles and Zappa wins the challenge.
Matt steps over and congratulates Zappa on their win. This does not sit well with Rob who snarls, “I’m not going to give the other team hugs and kisses.”
Russell is a Dweezil - As Russell carries the fishing gear reward back to the Zappa camp, he manages to slip a clue out of the basket. Rooster sees the less-than-David Copperfield quality sleight of hand, and before you can say “Epilady”, he’s told Mike who storms in with him to confront Russell and Natalie. Russell blusters, accuses, denies and basically loses another couple of members of the Russell Hantz fan club.
Performing Phil-ratio – Back at Overtipping, Phillip calls the tribe together for a something that is becoming an Open Mic Night tradition. He tells everyone that they should be proud because they performed “gallantry-ly.” Rob would never be called a speech therapist, but he pulls Phillip aside and tries to provide some guidance. He tells Phillip that he should avoid a tirade at Tribal. Rob also explains that there are some things still up in the air. He will put his hand on the shoulder of the person to be voted out so Phillip knows what to do. Rob confessionalizes that it’s all about the ratio of what Phillip knows and when he knows it.
Tribal Tattoo – Discussing the earlier Immunity Challenge, Jeff brings out the animal in Phillip and is treated to a gun show at the zoo – a tattoo of a gorilla on one arm and a lion on the other. Phillip explains the importance of these icons with a mix of metaphors that would make sense if your TV only got Animal Planet, Lifetime and The History Channel. Rob’s watching the World Wrestling Federation, so he taps out Kristina. Phillip votes for Kristina, but she plays the Immunity Idol and it’s Matt Elrod who takes the long walk (on water?) to Redemption Island.