LAST EDITED ON 08-07-01 AT 00:42 AM (EST)

ROFLMAO!

Q.T., that was masterful. Just imagine how jury members will respond to the "feces-throwing" Exhibits when you rub their noses (so to speak) in the bad faith behavior of mr. monkeyboy's employees...

Kryptonite, singing career, whine-o, level of care, how you do rise to the occasion!

I now comprehend why I was ordered to document BEG's change of venue for housing all castoffs from Episode 8 on.

I would like to forward the enclosed communication for your attention.

Yours,
Outfrontgirl

Dear Mr. Q.T. Pye:

Thank you for copying us your August 6, 2001 correspondence with Mr. Monkeyboy with respect to his claims, your counterclaims, and your wish for a reasonable settlement of the matter.

As you are aware, my clients believe they have suffered substantial damages from the carelessness of Mr. Monkeyboy.
It is my understanding that Mr. Monkeyboy entered into an agreement with BEG to guide and chaperone the Episode 9 Reward recipients, Mr. sleeeve and Ms. Dangerkitty, for the valuable consideration of the free publicity Mr. Monkeyboy would receive for his attempts to launch his career as a tourguide (as supplement to his resort activities).

You will have noted that Mr. Monkeyboy, in breach of that separate agreement, attempted to feed said contestants inferior grade fare (grubs and bruised bananas), and subsequently deserted the contest winners, causing them to become disoriented, lost, and generally "mis-guided" as a result of his neglect.

As a result of Mr. Monkeyboy's negligent performance of his guide duties, Mr. Dangerkitty suffered public humiliation (not to mention loss of consortium). Mr. sleeeve suffered a loss of innocence from which he may well never recover.

Mr. Dangerkitty has rejected the idea of a lawsuit against Mr. sleeeve, who apparently has very shallow pockets, and instead has joined with Mr. sleeeve in an attempt to recover from Mr. Monkeyboy.

You may anticipate that we will contact you in the near future, in order to ascertain whether Mr. Probe and BEG have an interest in joining as co-plaintiffs in Mr. DK's contemplated suit against Mr. Mboy. Said suit will allege negligent and intentional infliction of emotional distress and other causes of action, including fraud, in that:

Mr. Monkeyboy promised my clients his utmost care and attention, knowing that they would rely on his promise to chaperone them, knowing full well that he was misrepresenting his attention span (its deficit speaks for itself). Ms. Dangerkitty and Mr. Sleeeve did rely on Mr. Monkeyboy's promises and suffered severe detriment when he knowingly placed them in a seductive jungle environment and plied them with alcohol, after which he abandoned them to their own better judgment, absolutely foreseeable though it was that they were judgment impaired and that they relied on his care to hold their instinctual natures in check.

We will, needless to say, seek maximum punitive damages.

Respectfully,

Arnt Uke Lever, Esq.
Bliedum, Drye, & Densome, LLP

for
Mr. and Ms. Dangerkitty
and
Mr. Wassupmi Sleeeve

Edited cause the shyster can't afford a secretary