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AMAI 1254 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson" 10-12-02, 11:16 AM (EST) "AMAI's TAR3 Summaries" Just some more reading for you all to do. Enjoy, and feel free to post comments. The Amazing Race 3 - Episode 1 My first ever Episode One of TAR! I've always missed Episode One, but this time round, I got a reason to watch and tape it. It's all new to me but according to last year's recaps, it's déjà-vu for many of you. Phil our host tells us that 12 teams will compete for the million dollars. Their journey begins in the Everglades. The Everglades?!? I was positive we were looking at the set of the same village that they filmed Robin Williams visiting the young Vietnamese lady in Good Morning Vietnam. I guess all rice paddies look like swamps and vice versa. Let's meet our 12 teams, shall we? Teams need to step up so AMAI can sort them out, put names to biographical information and hand out nicknames wherever possible. Heather & Eve tell us they are recently graduated from Harvard Law School where they were roommates. Their plan is to use their cute & pretty blondeness to execute killer moves in order to get other teams to be in alliances with them and/or let them jump the queues and/or to convince perfect strangers to give them money. In a nutshell, they plan to act like dumb helpless females. What’s the betting a small dog dressed in miniature versions of their clothes is lurking somewhere in their luggage? In hopes that they have already made a tidy sum selling their life stories to Hollywood, because they probably won’t last long in this game, I dub them Team Legally Blonde. Mike and Kathy are long-distance lovers. She is from San Diego, he is from Detroit, which right away sounds like an inter-racial relationship to me. Mike says give them a week to discover what personal traits, character flaws and habits drive the other one nuts. If we're lucky, their personal relationship problems will be one of the highlights of the show. Before long we may end up calling them Team M&K which will then devolve into Team MMMKay; but I reckon I'll first differentiate these people using solid info, before starting with the fancy nickname footwork. No matter what ugly moniker they earn later, let’s start out by hoping that Team Long Distance Lovers provides the viewers with some solid fighting. Good times. Dennis is a white Baptist Preacher who nevertheless reminds me of James Earl Jones with his serious sombre expression. Dennis has one teeny tiny problem: his son Andrew is gay, or as he euphemistically puts it, he, Dennis, “has a problem with his sexual orientation.” Does Dennis also have a problem with his son being a male cheerleader? I got the impression that for Dennis the cheerleading was part & parcel of the whole "sexual orientation thing." Andrew is obviously gay in a prissy way, yet also well-adjusted. He comes across as a brave, fun-loving & happy-go-lucky soul. Imagine blending Survivor3's Brandon with Opie from Mayberry. He gets major points in my book. He does seem to be making an effort to enable him and his dad to get to know each other as people. As Andrew says, “Either we’ll be best friends or we’ll need a restraining order.” Something about this father & son team screamed one name and one name only for the Official AMAI Team Name: Team Cage Aux Folles. Never mind the details of who is gay and who isn't in the stage show. Andrew is witty & charming and I am hoping that his dad loosens up and enjoys his son’s delightful personality. I hope these two hang around a long time. Flo & Zach are another couple likely to hit trouble while on the run. She is on the small side, with dark hair. He looks like a low-resolution version of Art Garfunkle. They explain that they have finally gotten together after experiencing “romantic tension” because they were both with other people. The decision to use the stressful TAR situation as an environment to explore their compatibility is going to prove to be either the smartest thing they’ve ever done or the stupidest. To even a casual observer, the TAR environment is frenetic. It is a bit like making reservations on a cell phone while shopping on a laptop for exotic accessories for your new house while living out of a suitcase and dining from ready-to-eat packets, all while elbowing other people out of the way for a parking spot. There are no bonus points for being nice like there are in the real world. In TAR, you could find yourself without a partner for letting someone else jump the queue. Basically, I think teams need a solid relationship going in to handle this demanding game. Flo and Zach will either put a sparkle into their relationship or a sparkle into these recaps. Therefore, I’ve chosen Team Compatibility? to help remind you of who Flo & Zach are. Derek and Drew are identical twins whose profession is modeling. Their game strategy is to flirt and to be cutthroat with a smile. I would like to call them Team Zoolander but would it mean something to all of you readers? If you’ve not seen the movie “Zoolander”, check it out, cuz it will definitely give you a much better idea of why I’m calling these two bright sparks Team Zoolander. I do hope The Twins last for a while, if for no other reason than to help out with source material for these recaps. Gina and Sylvia are 30-something stay-at-home self-styled "Soccer Moms." Those kids they are shown with look a little young to be playing soccer, but I hear they start them younger every year. These moms are hoping to turn the demands of childrens' after-school activities, PTA meetings and organizing 3 different suppers for fussy eaters, into a winning TAR3 strategy. They want to do more than just tell their kids to go out and try to reach their dreams. They want to show their kids what it takes. And, if nothing else, the two of them will score a few days away from their usual lives, which no matter how much you love your husband and kids, can get to feel like a treadmill. Tremel and Talicia are the brother/sister team of the group and one of two black teams. She says he's a genius, but what she finds frustrating is he seems to put no effort into anything. He says he's lazy, but he can think under pressure. He’s ready to go “Rubber to the road.” He's a little up himself, but let's give him a chance before getting too nasty. Team TT is all I can come up with for them for now. Aaron and Arianne have been lifelong friends, having met in childhood. She describes them as “alternative people, colorful.” According to sources mentioned on the message boards, he is gay but they're planning to have a child together. She says she can think outside the box. These thumbnail sketches are not giving me much to work with here, but rather than Team AA, I’ll start with calling them Team Let's Make A Baby. Teri and Ian are the "old parents" who have been married for 22 years. Nothing extraordinary or remarkable about them yet. They say the same thing I bet all the older ones say - age wisdom knowledge experience blah blah blah. Their opening pictures are the most stilted of all the teams. They say they’re “leaders, not followers.” He says he's tenacious - time will tell whether Team Old Folks or Team Terrier is the more descriptive nick. Andre and Damon are a firefighter & a cop and the second black team. They served in Desert Storm together. I think secretly they are viewing this whole experience as a kind of war - it's them against the world. Maybe not so secretly - they agree that this adventure is a mission right up their alley. They’re used to going without food, shelter, whatever it takes. They seem likeable though. Team Men O’ War should help to remind you which two are Andre and Damon. Ken and Gerrard are another set of brothers. Gerrard is married & conservative, a republican, Ken is gay and a democrat. They're paunchy, balding, and after viewing the whole of Ep 1 twice, they definitely seem to be one of the most fun. So naturally, chances are that they won't last very long, but they'll be entertaining while they do. Team Fun! John Vito and Jill are the strangest team of all. She looks like a kewpie doll come to life: you know the look -- enormous head and huge expressive eyes with a tiny body. She said she and her brother were going to do TAR1 together but then he was killed in the World Trade Centre on 9/11. John Vito was one of her brother’s best friends and he comforted her and was understanding during the period of mourning. A relationship developed between them. I was going to call them Team 9/11 right up until Jill mentioned that her dead brother is their Third Teammate - {shiver} now I think Spooky Team 9/11 is not inappropriate. Definitely a weird vibe with these two. OKAY. 2 whole pages to introduce the teams. There will be 13 legs, 9 of which will be elimination rounds. The money given them for each leg is meant to include all expenses except airfare. Phil the Host tells the teams that the first clue is sitting atop their luggage, inconveniently placed 500 feet away. Phil says, “The world is waiting for you. Good luck, travel safe. Everyone ready? Go. They're off! They are forced to run over to the luggage in single file, trying to avoid stepping in the giant puddles in their haste. Various contestants are shown ripping the clue out of its protective envelope. Be warned, from here on in, every single second of this show is action action action. Even the reveal of each new set of instructions can leave a viewer breathless, when a montage of players is shown reading tidbits: "Angel of Independence in Mexico City." "$100 for expenses." "Take one of the vehicles parked down the road." "Choose one of three flights." Everyone manages to get the luxury SUVs started and all are enroute to the airport. Phil voices over that only 7 teams can get on the first flight, and we see the panicked actions of teams as they jockey for position to choose the right lane for the right airline, fumbling with a toll booth on the way. Flo gives instructions: "Go Zack. follow those twins." This is even funnier on the second viewing of the episode, once you’ve seen the gamut of stupidity that those twins can run. Team TT have organized themselves so that Talicia is driving, while Tremel is in the back seat making small talk about how fabulous he is and how given that his sister has the same genes, he is sure that some of his perfection is in her. He tells her to drive less like Mom and more like Dad. He tells his sister that this team is lucky to have him on it. Hoo boy. Tremel didn't waste a minute giving the audience a reason to not dislike him, while giving recappers reason to rejoice. What an a-hole. If he were any more up himself, he'd have to wipe his face with toilet paper. I hope this guy isn't a jerk the whole time. I hate having to feel sorry for one team member. Team Legally Blonde is the only team I’m not 100% certain which girl is which. I think it’s Eve who is driving really aggressively, butting in front of Flo & Zach (Team Compatibility?) who curse & swear about it. These two teams look set to have a showdown in the not-too-distant future. In another car, Teri is leaping and scrambling all over the backseat trying to organize baggage, while Old Man Grump Ian is driving and voicing over about how he tenacious he is. I’m thinking Team Terrier is the better Official AMAI team nickname for the Old Couple. A few minutes is spent showing us teams arriving at the airport and jostling to get in front of non-competitor passengers, and dealing unsuccessfully with airport staff who curmudgeonly refuse to let them jump the queue, notably Andre & Damon (Team Men O War). While waiting to board, the Legal Eagles Heather & Eve decide to test their abilities to work their assets. They beg money from total strangers, explaining that part of the game involves begging. They collect a total of over $50 American, which should enable them to live it up big whilst in Mexico. In the end, the following teams snag seats aboard the first flight, American Airlines flight departing at 1:40. They garner almost a 1 hour jump on the others, and also guarantee themselves one round of not having to consider using a Fast Forward to stay in the game: Heather and Eve (Team Legally Blonde) John Vito & Jill (Spooky Team 9/11) Andre & Damon (Team Men o' War) Aaron & Arianne (Team Let's Make A Baby), Mike & Kathy (Team Long Distance Lovers) Flo & Zach (Team Compatibility?) and Dennis and Andrew (Team Cage Aux Folles) The other five teams all have arrived in time to catch the second flight departing at 2:30 via Aero Mexico, so we never learn the name of the third possible airline or its time of departure. It’s 4p.m. and American Airlines flight 2177 is arriving in Mexico City. Zach gets a moment to say that he doesn't know how long Flo can take the strain - she's a high maintenance girl. With so many teams to show doing stuff, and precious little time, I wonder if this gratuitous negativity is a sign that Flo&Zach don't last too long. Otherwise, why spend any time explaining what one team member thinks will go wrong with his teammate virtually before the game has really begun? Aaron & Arianne (Team Let's Make A Baby) are the first to arrive at the Angel de Independencia monument. They find the next clue, which is a photograph of some guy called 'Pablo'. This task is really about first identifying the building in the photograph. Team BabyMakers is a smart team, with knowledge of enough Spanish to ask intelligent questions and receive accurate helpful answers. Part of me wanted to see them show the photo to someone and be told, "Hey that ees my friend, Pablo, come I will take you to heem," with the hapless team then being lead off on a wild Pablo chase all over town. Ah, but this kind of antic will probably happen soon enough. For the time being, Team Babymkers learns what they need to know, they locate the building and Pablo, with Andre & Damon (Team Men o' War) close behind them. Pablo hands over the clue, which has them searching for Hotel De Cortes, where they are to sign up for first-come, first-served charter bus rides leaving on the morrow. Natch, there are only 4 teams per bus. The first bus is to depart at 8:00 a.m. and ends up carrying these teams: Aaron & Arianne (Team Let's Make A Baby) Flo and Zach (Team Compatibility?) John Vito & Jill (Team Spooky 9/11) Mike & Kathy (Team Long Distance Lovers) On the second bus these teams will depart at 10:00 a.m. Andre & Damon (Team Men O' War) Heather & Eve (Team Legally Blonde), Andrew and Dennis (Team Cage Aux Folles). Teri & Ian (Team Old Terriers) The last 4 teams were stuck taking the third bus which won’t leave till noon: Tramet & Talicia (Team TT) Gina & Sylvia (Team Soccer Moms) Ken & Gerrard (Team Fun!) Derek & Drew (Team Zoolander) In fact, Team Zoolander, the hapless twins, very nearly didn't make it this far. They had asked their cabbie to wait for them while they went to rendezvous with Pablo, get their clue, and return. Cabbie indicates he will circle around. Turns out it’s a huge circle. The twins return, clue in hand, but there is no sign of their cab. Other teams are hailing new taxis. "Oh no, says Twin 1, "We left our bags in the cab.” Commercial break. haha hahaha how stupid can you get? It obviously seemed brilliant at the time, but that’s only to a person who didn’t bother to notice the gazillion circling taxi cabs, waiting for tired tourists. Back from commercial, Team Zoolander is lamenting the loss of the game. “That's Game Over for us." D'oh. I kinda hope so. What dim bulbs. They pace up and down, wondering how they can possibly continue, when finally “their” taxi pulls up, with bags safely in the trunk. Wanna bet the producers got hold of the cabbie and explained he was being filmed? Finally, tho, everyone is at the hotel and all signed up for Charter Buses. A whole evening with nothing to do but find a cheap way to eat. Of the 12 teams we could look in on, we follow the Soccer Moms into a grocery store. Hmm, how interesting. A little girl wraps herself around one Soccer Mom's leg, prompting tears and declarations of "how I miss my kids!" Okay, hold the phone. Where in the world do children go up to strangers like that? How much did the producers pay that kid’s mother, that’s what I want to know. That is the phoniest bit of scripting I’ve seen in quite a few days. The next morning teams need to get their stuff together. It appears that different teams have slept in different parts of the hotel, ranging from their own private rooms to sleeping bags tossed down on the lobby floor. Maybe Heather & Eve DO have the right idea - a few extra bucks can really improve the quality of life at a pit stop. While the 8:00 a.m. bus hits the road, two of the 12:00 teams decide to go head-to-head for the Fast Forward. Team Fun! and Team Zoolander agree that whoever gets the Fast Forward will tell the other team so that they don't waste time. Ken & Gerrard taxi over to the Santo Domingo Plaza, where street vendors sell typing & printing for illiterates. They need to find the typist vendor who has a message for them (the message being the Fast Forward itself). Ken the gay brother takes a moment to admire the legs of Team Zoolander. Those twins are decked out in running gear, having made the decision to literally run over to the Plaza, as if to prove how utterly fabulously fit they are. Cocky Zoolanders! Even the slow Mexico City taxis are faster than them, and Team Fun! are at the market, and with good conversational Spanish are making quick work of enquiring of each Typing Vendor whether he has a message for them. Even had Team Idiot Brothers gotten to the plaza first, their complete lack of Spanish would have likely seen them falling behind in no time. Team Fun! finds the right vendor, and wins the Fast Forward. Gerrard wants to leave without keeping his word to the twins, but Ken refuses to do so for the sake of an extra 5 minutes. Not to mention that Ken finds his rivals to be sooo gorgeous. Here they come, here comes Team Zoolander, and Ken notes that they actually had sweat on them!! “Those gods had sweat!” exults Ken. Having lost their shot at the Fast Forward, the twins are ready to give up. What a pair of losers! Oh my heck - so they are doomed to take the charter bus with Team Soccer Moms and Team TT. It’s like watching Wil from TAR2 whining all over again. The Charter Buses arrive at Tequesaquitengo Airfield, the Detour Spot, where the clue reveals the choice to be Wings or Wheels. Wheels involves travelling seven miles by obstinate ass to the pit stop. Wings involves skydiving to a location which turns out to be further away and then having to drive 30 miles to the pit stop in rundown vans. Mike & Kathy (Team Long Distance Lovers) take a donkey cart. John Vito and Jill (Spooky Team 9/11) and Aaron & Arianne (Team Let’s Make A Baby) elect to jump. Just as the first 3 teams are starting off on their chosen Detour routes, Ken & Gerrard, Team Fun!, are shown arriving at the Pit Stop, the Hacienda something de la Palma. For being the first team, they also win a 7 night Caribbean cruise vacation, which they may enjoy after the Race. So all in all I think it was worth it for them to use up their Fast Forward. Although I like them, I don't think they have what it takes to get to the end. However, they’re still in the game and they got themselves an extra vacation. If memoy serves, while Fast Forwards usually manage to arrive first, they don't always get a bonus vacation prize. Nice going, guys. Back to our Detouring. Flo & Zach (Team Compatibility?) decide to jump. Heather and Eve start out taking a donkey cart, but it breaks down throwing one of the girls into the dirt. Team Legally Blonde then decide to take the skydiving route, even though Eve is deathly scared of heights. It's a major Fear Factor Moment for the TAR producers. Poor girl cried buckets, but eventually managed to allow herself to be flung out of the plane like a dead body, all flailing limbs. The poor professional jumper had a real handful trying to land them both safely. The Oldsters Teri & Ian are shown pushing and pulling their cart & donkey. It appears they somehow got rid of their non-English speaking driver. More teams are arriving at the pit stop. Flo & Zach (Team Compatibility?) get 2nd spot. Arianne & Aaron (the Baby Makers) right behind them in 3rd. Team Long Distance Lovers, Mike & Kathy, take 4th, and John Vito & Jill (Spooky Team) 5th. Bus #3 is shown just arriving at the Detour Point. Everyone elects to jump. It goes smoothly, but all three teams (Soccer Moms, the Twins and Team TT) have problems with their rickety vans. Back at the Hacienda, Team Legally Blonde (Heather & Eve) is 6th to arrive. Team Men o War (Andre & Damon) is 7th. Team Cage Aux Folles, Dennis & Andrew, arrive 8th. The Terriers Ian and Teri are 9th. Tremel & Talicia are first to arrive at the Hacienda of the three teams from the 3rd bus. They are the most ecstatic team, having been certain that they were taking a walk of shame. Their victory dance was really delightful, so pleased were they to be 10th instead of 12th. It's a race between the Soccer Moms and the idiot Team Zoolander. To keep the suspense going as long as possible, we get a window view through the car window arriving at the path leading to the hotel. Finally, we learn the sad news, the Soccer Moms are going to be last, cuz Team Double Trouble have managed to squeeze in in 11th place. The Soccer Moms are still proud of themselves, tho obviously very disappointed. But they keep a good spirit up and don't start bawling on camera. Next week, frustration builds as some teams unravel (camera pans over Team Zoolander.) Some girl takes her top off, while other teams land in cold water.   Top

Subject     Author     Message Date     ID    RE: AMAI's TAR3 Summaries AMAI 10-12-02 1    RE: AMAI's TAR3 Summaries L82LIFE 10-15-02 2    Ep 3 - "Fleeing the Scene of the C... AMAI 10-19-02 4  RE: AMAI's TAR3 Summaries Red Lady 10-17-02 3    RE: AMAI's TAR3 Summaries StarvingButStrong 10-23-02 5

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AMAI 1254 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson" 10-12-02, 11:18 AM (EST) 1. "RE: AMAI's TAR3 Summaries" TAR3 Ep 2 - Taking the Road to the TAR Pit from Hell. Previously we got our first look at the 24 people sufficiently deluded to think they have what it takes to win a Million Dollars in the Amazing Race. I already recapped the first ep in its entirety, so why waste more time recapping my recap? Suffice to say we won’t have to utter the words ‘Soccer Moms’ again until they take time out of their busy lives to cheer the winners at the end. During the week, we worked up new nics for teams. One of the best is Guns & Hoses for the cop and firefighter team, Andre & Damon. Early in tonight’s ep, we learn that Tramel & Talicia refer to themselves as TNT, so we can’t really take credit for that. Mike & Kathy, previously the Long Distance Lovers, are going to be called MMMKay, cuz he’s such a wimp. Some of these teams have pretty thin relationships. Sure there is a father & son team, but how close can a Baptist preacher and his gay cheerleader son be? In fact, some of the “relationships” are so lame that future TARs will likely boast such couples as Diner Waitress + Regular Customer, Homeowner + Gas Meter Reader, Housewife + PaperBoy. Spooky Team has paved the way for a team featuring one live Psychic who summons dead spirits with a Ouija board. At 10:30 pm, the Ice Cream Team are ready to bob & weave. Ken & Gerrard look like they eat enough Ben & Jerry, so with thanks to 1Blond for the idea, we’re ready to learn that teams need to drive themselves to Teotihuacan to find the 20 storey Pyramid of the Sun on the Avenue of the Dead so they can climb up for the clue. Teams get $360 for this leg, a lot of money considering they don’t have to leave Mexico. Flo says of Zack that he’s a perfect companion for this adventure. I get the feeling that sometime around the 5th leg she’s going to be screaming blue murder at him, but for now she’s saying he’s a great navigator & driver, which means they’ll probably get lost during this leg of the race. They’re an odd pair, and I reckon the only reason they’ll make the final 5 is that others are even stupider than them. Flo & Zack have been forced to be the leaders because they finished 2nd last leg. I think they prefer to be followers cuz they wait for the Airheads to start so the 4 of them can study the map and decide how to proceed. Oh yeah. I’ve decided that Airon and Airianne are to be called Lord and Lady Airhead. These snarky friends will have had a nasty comment for everybody by about Ep4. In one DR, they talk about the heterosexual platonic friendship between Flo & Zach. “Why haven’t they done it?” Lady Airhead wants to know. I’d like to see someone making snarky comments about the Airheads, but the problem is that there doesn’t appear to be another team capable of anything approaching sarcastic wit. This season’s teams leave a lot to be desired in the smart dept. Mike & Kathy (he’s the wimp and she’s the petite Asian) leave about the same time as Spooky Team and these two teams confab. MMMKay probably figured that Spooky’s 3rd teammate ought to be helpful with finding the Avenue of the Dead. I think it’s the Air Team who refer to Spooky Team as Rambette and Rock. I don’t know why, but my eye is always drawn to tiny Jill. I keep trying to look at John Vito, but my glance bounces right off him. I couldn’t pick him out of a crowd of 3. Now why is that? He IS a big guy, after all. Teams head out in the order in which they arrived except for Andre & Damon, now ‘Guns N Hoses.’ They were penalized 78 minutes for not sticking to the map back when they were donkey-carting. Demoted to 9th place they then sleep in as well, not getting started until 4 am. Tremel & Talicia, the bro/sis team who did the Happy Dance at the end of last ep are all about calling themselves TNT and talking about how all they need is a spark and they’ll blow the house down. These two are too cheerful by half. It’s 9pm after a long day of work, I don’t need this much bubbly personality this late in my day, thanks all the same. More DRs (oh yeah, did I mention - I love that term for confessional from Big Brother. DR is short for Diary Room and it just slides off the tongue and off the fingertips. You’ll come to learn that I use it in all my recaps, regardless of whether the players are BBs, Survivors, Amazing Racers, or Mole-sters. “Private” camera time is a DR - just cuz it’s two people sittin’ on a ledge in Mexico or a tree stump in downtown BonneFocke doesn’t make it something other than a DR.) So Lady Airhead DRs that the Airheads, MMMKay, Spooky & FloZack formed an alliance in an effort to edge out the DoubleMint Twins. Yep, she called them the DoubleMint twins. This girl is really an asset to recappers - she’s totally into the nicknaming of other teams. But frankly it won’t take 4 teams working together to push the Idiot Twins out of the Race. They’re gonna accomplish that all by themselves. We’ve barely gotten started, and already I’m on my third page of typing. I better hurry up or this thing is gonna be too big to post. I forgot to mention that the Terriers are still in the race - they just don’t go with this young, hip, with-it crowd. I keep forgetting about the old dogs. Why is Phil wearing a crystal on a piece of leather around his neck? Is he trying to channel other hosts to help him say the same lines he says every ep? Idiot Twins are last to set out and decide to go for the Fast Forward. They are in a hell of a hurry to use up their Fast Forward. The DumDums must be thinking they get to win an FF once per leg, instead of once per Race. This FF is about flying with some Voladores, so off they drive to find the flying fellows. Meanwhile our main batch of fools are getting lost. Follow a loser, be a loser. The Airheads are disappointed in Zach :lol yep they followed FloZach on the path straight to the TAR pits of hell. Guns N Hoses go into a hotel to ask for directions. Team ChaChaCha these two are NOT, but they do find someone who tells them he lives near the Pyramid and is willing to go with them so he can be on tv for 2.5 seconds. Cage Aux Folles have taken a wrong turn. Dad admits he should have listened to Son, while Son sits in the back seat smirking and nodding. Ice Cream Team are at the Pyramid Del Sol hours before it opens. The Legally Blondes did the smart thing and elected to follow the map instead of someone much stupider than themselves. But look who reaches the top first - Spooky Team!!! That 3rd teammember really did help in finding the Avenue of the Dead. Teams are to get to Tapo Bus Station so they can travel 1000 miles to Cancun, where they are to look for the next route marker at San Marino marina. As Spooky John Vito drives, Jill keeps saying “T-A-P-O bus station.” John Vito might be too thick to understand ‘Tapo’, but spelling the name could also be for the benefit of the dead bro, who is used to being contacted via Ouija board. The Idiot Twins have found the Voladores. They are to climb up a pole 100 feet in the air, and then hook themselves up so that they can swing by their feet down to the ground. They express their usual dismay but it’s too late to back out. They don’t really swing by their feet, but receive the FF instructions anyway. It’s T-A-P-O bus station and Cancun for them too and then straight to the pit stop at Diamante K Bungalows, Tulum. At T-A-P-O bus station, Legally Whiny are pulling out all the stops to wrangle a seat on the bus departing at 10a.m. Eve starts crying, begging some guy to hold the bus while their tickets are processed. These girls are getting sickening, and I say we go with new nicks for them, Heave 1 and Heave 2. They get on the 10:00 bus with Ice Cream, Airheads, Spooky, FloZack and MMMKay. It’s too late for Guns N Hoses, who arrive with seconds to spare, cash in hand, but alas no seats left on the bus. They have to ride in the next bus with the other Losers: TNT, the Terriers, Idiot Twins and Cage Aux Folles. Ian Terrier tells the Idiot Twins that the other teams are all on their way already having left on the 10 a.m. bus, and that the Idiots will likely be 4th or 5th to get to the pit stop, FF notwithstanding. In weird high voices, the Idiots make unmemorable lame remarks, which prove that they’re idiots to even be concerned with what Ian has to say. That Ian fancies himself a right Harrison Ford, doesn’t he? TNT are lamer, repeating that they’re gonna blow the house down. Oh right. Suddenly there’s a car crash! We naturally go to commercial so we have to worry for 5 minutes about the hell is going on. We come back to learn that the Loser Bus has been sideswiped by some idiot Mexican tourist, probably paid by the TAR producers to further vex the Idiot Twins. They’re already 3 1/2 hours behind the first bus and grumble that they might not get any value for their FF. Half an hour later a new bus is there and folks have to jump out of the disabled bus cuz the door won’t open. Meanwhile, Winners’ Bus arrives in Cancun and the usual confusion of hailing taxis ensued. This time Rambette Jill asks if the taxis are outside! There is obviously a huge market for a volume of TaxiCabs for Dummies. While in the taxi, Airianne decides to save time and change into her bathing suit in the cab. “Girl’s Gone Wild” she screeches, as the cabbie gets an eyeful in the rear view mirror. Just one eyeful mind you, cuz she isn’t all that endowed. At the marina Teams are instructed to catch a ferry to where the Detour takes place, where teams choose between Manpower of Kayaks to search a small area or Horsepower of Waveboats to search a large area. The Airheads choose the Waveboat, and Lady Airhead comments that Mike is such a wimp, always choosing the slow road She reckons his cowardice is gonna get in the way for Kathy when she needs a big strong man around. That Aaron isn’t exactly a prize, dearie. MMMKay do okay, and find their route marker. Airheads also do okay, having teamed up with Legally Whiny to search the large area. The clue instructs teams to land at a Beach Club and then drive 47 miles to the next stop. Team Spooky elect to take a kayak, but have no luck cuz Dead Bro can’t function near water, so they go back & change for a Waveboat, losing half an hour in the process. FloZach are funny disembarking - he just leaps out and she has to call for him to help her with the bags “Hello? Take this?” We won’t have to wait long for these two to go ballistic on each other. The second bus finally pulls up and all the Loser Teams (except for the DumDum Twins) are running to try to catch the ferry to go do the Kayak/Waveboat portion. They pass the Winner teams returning from that task. Gerrard Cream says to Ken Cream “Lookit you, what are you taking a Sunday Stroll? We’re trying to catch a ferry.” The irony is lost on him, but not on me. Ice Cream elects to Kayak, and Ken’s comment “I feel like the Queen of the Nile” needs no further embellishment. Such Fun this team, eh? Cage Aux Folles, the Terriers and TNT elect to take a Waveboat. Dad&Son have no real problems finding the buoy, but the other two are in a mess. The Terriers demonstrate why they’re called the Terriers: they capsize their boat and Ian Terrier gives encouragement to his wife: “Come on girl, gotta get on girl, come on girl.” TNT are going so slowly cuz Talicia is at the controls. They’re both kinda big, and his ego is huge, and it’s just too much for the craft. Tramel says his big sis is carrying his fragile world on her back. Over they go, not once, not twice but three times, including near the buoy. “At least I get to pee.” says Tramel. Good for you pal - don’t drink the water near that spot, guys. They get so far behind that they miss catching the ferry back. I thought that if you were in a waveboat, you could land at a Beach Club, instead of going back for the ferry. I don’t know with this show - so much is going on that you could watch 5 times and still be confused. Anyway TNT explodes with a fizzle, and are waaaaay behind - they don’t look able to overcome the huge gap they’ve put between themselves and the other Loser Teams. We check back with the DumDum Twins, who are driving driving driving, trying to find the Diamante K Bungalows. I’m hoping they arrive last and get eliminated, even after successfully completing the Fast Forward. Everyone else has to go to the Beach Club at Cozumel to do a Roadblock, a task only one teammember may perform. This one involves swimming with dolphins in a salt water pool. Bright spark Michael says he’ll do it, then voices-over that he doesn’t know how to swim. ROFL! Too funny. Swimmers are Airianne, Zach, Michael, Heather, Ken, John Vito, Andrew, one of Guns N Hoses (I won’t figure out which is which until they’re fighting LOL), Ian. By the time TNT get there it’s nightfall and I just didn’t record which of them swam. The task involves putting on mask & flippers and searching the pool bottom for plastic packets containing the final clue that directs teams to the pit stop. It’s 57 miles to the Town of Tulum. Airon says they have to find the Dynamite Bungalows. He’s gonna be a big help I know it. I can see some good times ahead with Dyslexic Boy Some teams appear to have driven themselves to the Pit Stop, while others took taxis. Again - who the hell knows what is going on? Starting with this recap, I’ll be keeping track of who used the FF in which ep, so that we’ll know who is screwed for the next eps. LOL. Teams arrived as follows: 1. Derek & Drew (Idiot Twins) used the FF ep 2 2. Airheads, Airon & Airianne 3. Legally Dumb Blonde & Whiny, Heave Ho 1 and Heave Ho 2 4. MMMKay, Michael & Kathy 5. FloZach 6. Ice Cream Team (Ken & Gerrard) used the FF ep 1 7. Spooky Team, Jill the Rambette, John Vito the Rock & Dead Bro 8. Guns N Hoses, Andre & Damon 9. Cage Aux Folles, Dennis the Dad and Andrew the Son 10. Team Terrier, Ian & Teri. Hours later, TNT arrive and learn they’re out. Tramel is kinda lame - “oh Phil, I wasn’t listening, tell us at the next pit stop.” Goodbye idiot siblings. She proves to be an okay gal, saying “TNT are all wet, no longer explosive, signing out.” Too bad Talicia was paired up with her idiot bro - she would have been a good kid to have around for a while. Next time Idiot Twins laze around on a beach, while other teams have to drive huge tractor like objects to get to the pit stop.   Top

L82LIFE 5333 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold" 10-15-02, 04:50 PM (EST) 2. "RE: AMAI's TAR3 Summaries" Thanks, AMAI, for another fun read. I do love me some summaries. Guns N Hoses-what a scream! LMAO   Top

AMAI 1254 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson" 10-19-02, 04:48 PM (EST) 4. "Ep 3 - "Fleeing the Scene of the Crime"" LAST EDITED ON 10-20-02 AT 10:03 AM (EST) Thanks, L82Life and Red Lady, for your patronage & words of encouragement. Hopefully this next installment will have you hungry for more. TAR3 Ep 3 Previously our 10 teams were “lost” in Mayheeco, but then they “found” religion at an 850 year old ex-monastery. Lady Airhead revealed her tiny ta-tas to a Mayheecan taxi driver while Twolander (thx GalacticCowgirl!) are now being shown in all their deluded splendour: a tidbit reveals that they considered a 100 foot climb up a pole to claim the Fast Forward to be more dangerous than skydiving. Flozac led the Anti-Twin Allies down a dead-end path. There was more, but them’s the highest of the lowlights. We eavesdrop in on the monastery, watching teams break bread and wind together. It’s somewhat reassuring to know that teams are getting a decent meal once a week. Twolander depart first at the strike of 3:18 a.m. The TAR producers are still working up the courage to write lame-o Survivor-style poetry, as evidenced by this tidbit in the opening clue: “Tally Ho. It’s time to cross the Pond” which a Twin squeaks aloud before our bubbly host Phil mercifully interrupts to voice-over in a normal man’s voice that teams will now have to fly 5500 miles to London England. No time for a quick pint, teams are to proceed directly to that well-known tourist trap Scudamore’s in the heart of bustling Cambridge to collect the next clue. The Euro Dollar and No-Value Added Taxes have together inflated beyond recognition the cost of a pair of bus tickets and a couple of taxicabs, as teams need a whopping U.S. $440 for this leg of the Race. We are forced to learn more about some teams. The Twins, being twins, have their own secret non-verbal language. They don’t have to complete sentences - just a look, a smile, a hint of a grin, and they know INSTANTLY what the other is thinking. When I first heard that I thought I’d be able to begin using emoticons to tell their story, but it’s just more DoubleSpeak from the DoubleMints. One of them is always talking so I don’t see how the other gets a chance to slip in a non-verbal comment. As the Airheads depart, Lord A proclaims them to be the leaders, while Lady A vows to chase down those Twins. The Heave Hos are right on the hoofs of the A’s and state for the record that they, too are part of the Anti-Twin Alliance. MMMKay leave now-ish and we learn that they met in Cancun before returning to RL spouses & kids. Mike says he & Kathy are too tired for romance but it’s cool to return to the scene of the crime. I smell a pair of future Judge Judy contestants. When FloZach’s turn to depart comes, Flo prattles in a DR about how she hopes she & Zach will be a long-term relationship. Now that we’re getting a close-up I notice her crossed-eyes. I was wondering how she could view Zach as “marrying material” - now I know: she can’t see straight. Time to check on the Axis of Evil. The Twins are squeaking and groinking about vwar xsdr dvrmstop- oops translator on: best case scenario they’re the only ones on the plane. I’m hoping they mean the only AR team, and not the only passengers. Although given the Nude Incestuous Jpeg of them that’s making the rounds at EZboard, I wouldn’t put it past them to want a whole plane to themselves. The Squidly Factor (i.e., the ickiness factor) just went up a couple of notches. Now that the whole Airhead Alliance is officially on its way, time to pull over to the side of the road and confab. “Get the Twins, stop the twins, lie to the twins, we need a plan to foil the twins.” MMMike, who is a hell of a hottie IMO, is given a DR to state that he is only with these people out of necessity - he wouldn’t click with any of them out in the world. I hope he means, except Kathy - but maybe that’s supposed to be understood. Mike’ll just go along til it’s time to dump them. Methinks this is foreshadowing and that MMMKay will be the first of the Alliance teams to be eliminated. A shame, but that’s not gonna happen this ep, so let’s do a Scarlett O’Hara and think about it tomorrow. KG - Ken & Gerry - are #6 to depart and the first team NOT to be kvetching about the damn twins. KG reckon that while all the beautiful strong teams ahead of them are focusing on the Twolanders, said teams will not be focused on them. Gerry says he & his bro may not be beautiful and strong, but they are full of spunk. Gay Ken sheepishly says, “Yeah, Spunk” but I think he is embarrassed to be hearing and using that word in “mixed company.” Finally the Overkill Alliance are at the airport. As they run in, they’re all yelling, “A prize to whoever can find the twins, Capture the twins, Kill the twins.” Their animosity towards the loveable Twolanders is making me start to like them, myself. The Twolanders I mean. Departing 7th are John Vito and Jill, with the Dead Bro probably already at the airport, just unable to take advantage and obtain best seats for his tribemates. JohnV is in the back seat, talking about how ballsy Jill is. I agree with JohnV that a girl with balls is “not your typical girl”. Well, at least she has a normal female shape and there’s no Adam’s Apple scar on her throat. I’m just a teensy bit concerned about JVito. I think he needs to hope the TAR itinerary doesn’t call for a pit stop in Italy. I’ve a sneaking suspicion JV is supposed to be hiding out in Sicily, cuz he’s always shown either in shadow, or from a distance. There’s another quick scene of the Double D’s, but I couldn’t make out what they were saying - ah ha finally an example of that non-verbal communication. Just squeaks and grunts, oinks & splinks. Michael comments that there are too many cooks buying airline tickets to Mexico City. :lol, I didn’t know you had to be a cook to buy airline tickets. Mikey, maybe you oughta be buying tickets for Acupulco, to help ease the bottleneck. Back again to the Monastery. With 10 teams spread out over what seems like 10 hours, we spend half the ep watching teams get started. The Serve & Protects (SAPs for short) say they need to improve. Either their personalities are duller than ditchwater or they’re actually going to be around for awhile, cuz that blink&you miss it moment was all these two had in the way of “personal confessional DR facetime.” Sis Boom Pa, the gay son/preacher dad duo get some facetime to set things up for later. Son wants to improve relationship with dad and get dad to see that son is 21 and an adult. Hey, son, ever thought of dumping the day job? Cheerleading doesn’t exactly scream “I’m All Grown Up.” Son gets to read more of the original instructions, just in case any viewer was questioning whether it were A-Okay & TAR approved for the cooks at the airport to be running around checking 50 different airlines for ways to get the hell out of Cancun airport in the general direction of London. That’s a cute method to bring the viewers back to the Airport, where we see more haggling and computer typing and tickets dropping into slots. This - is - not - to - be - missed - stuff. :rolleyes The Tenacious Terriers are finally departing. They say they are here to set an example to their grown children to never give up, even if your spouse is making you bark & howl. Back again (whiplash yet?) to the main star this ep - the Airport Staff. Some folks are not happy with just getting to Mexico City - now Teams are squawking about wanting to book tickets all the way to London cuz the Twins are doing it, or Ken & Gerry are doing it. There’s more time spent pointlessly showing teams talking to staff about whether their airline has scheduled flights going to London or Paris. How come nobody thought of flying to Toronto? We have a great airport. It’s 8:25 p.m., ep time, and I’m just wondering when things are gonna get started. They haven’t even left Cancun yet. After a lot of scuffling around, and a comment by Mike (again!) on how relieved he is to dump the Heaves, with all their chicken clucking in his ears, my notes say that a lot of teams got their tickets to London organized, but only CageyII have actual seats on a connecting flight. JV&J have seats on a plane to Mexico City that allows ghosts to travel outside, and MK & HE are both set up to travel via Paris. haha Mikey spoke too soon!! One Flo Over the Cuckoo Zack and Lord & Lady Airhead are holding tickets to London via Paris but have no seat allocations. Finally we see some folks on planes. Twolander close their eyes so they don’t have to see the other teams, which is almost as good as them not being there, right? Now SisBoomPa are at the airport, and ohmygod we have to go through their stuff with talking to staff and trying to wrangle seats. Will the ticket purchasing never end??? Son then gets on the phone and spins a serious web of lies about how he needs to get to his sick mother in England. He is successful in spite of his lack of an English accent that would have lent creedence to the story. Dad is feeling more bonded to Son than ever. Nothing like a good lie to keep a religious family together. The Terriers show up at the airport, and finally we as a group can move on with our lives and this ep. After snapping at the heels of passersby and barking at his wife, Ian Terrier successfully books tickets and kisses the hand of the staffer who punched their data into the computer and caused those tickets to land in the out-tray. This is so riveting - aren’t you glad you tuned in? MMMKay and the Airheads arrive in Mexico City and run to their connecting flight half an airport away, present their economy tickets to a guy at a ticket punching desk, who tells them there are no seats on the plane. Before you can say, kiss my New York Ass, presto change-o, these lucky four are travelling business class. Too bad the airline didn’t get some free advertising in exchange for this nicety. The Twins are already enroute to Cambridge. Aren’t you glad you used Dial? Airheads & MMMKay arrive in London at 10:15. a.m. These departure, arrival and other times are only randomly presented, or else I’m just managing to randomly notice them. Fricken hell, I’m on page 5 of my typing, and we’re only just learning that The Detour at Scudamore’s involves a choice between Punting or Biking, to find a bridge which is either 1 s-l-o-w mile along the River Sham, or 6 quick miles on a tandem bike via a marked course through the sleepy streets of the college town. Clues are dangling from a bridge. My brain is dangling from my spinal column. How will the teams decide what’s best? As usual each choice has its pros & cons. Phil says these same lines every ep - but always in front of the new landscape. I think this is a ploy to make us believe he’s “actually” there, and not just walking JulieChen style in front of a blue screen in a studio. Twins take the punt, and argue amongst themselves like an old gay couple, about how to steer and how to sit and when to stand, and for a moment I’m wishing they’d fall in. They don’t of course, cuz they aren’t total clutzes. It’s all part of the “model” in them. The same can’t be said for CageyII, who manage to fall in 3 times between them, getting huge laughs from the crowd that has gathered to see the film crew. In Toronto, the sight of a million trailers and miles of electric cables draws grumbling rather than appreciation, so that’s probably why TAR never sends the teams to Toronto. WTF? We’d be a great city to race through. While we don’t have nearly as many one-way streets as Boston, there is always construction to impede the teams. I’d like to see them have to find a clue in the SkyDome in the middle of a Blue Jays baseball game. Okay, sorry, digressing here, when there are still 4 pages of notes to slog through. The slightly incestuous Twolanders read their new clue and reveal that now teams need to take a chartered bus to Aberdeen Scotland then get to a route marker in a field in the highlands. Beware of cowpies. Buses depart at 7:30, 10 pm and 1:30 a.m.. With 7 hours til the first bus, the Twolanders say they might as well have lunch. 7 hours for lunch? How about doing laundry, sight-seeing, hiding from the other teams, signing autographs for dizzy grateful fans on their latest ad for Calvin Klein underwear? MMMkay and the Airheads are now at the Detour. A&A take the punt and the opportunity to make yet another “Get the Twins” remark. Mikey says he lives by rules that don’t allow for riding on a tandem bike, cuz it’s too corny. I say Mikey has found another way to get out of doing anything that vaguely smacks of danger. I try to hide my disappointment at not getting to watch his muscled legs pumping, and off they punt. MMMIkey tells KKKathy that she can just lay down and he’ll steer all by himself. This is an awful lot of facetime for these two, what’s the betting they’re out next ep? It’s not a comforting thought - it means the Terriers would still be in the Race. One Flo Over The CuckooZack and the Heaves are faced with the Detour choice. Heaves leap into a punt and immediately commence bickering which according to Heave One, has been their usual m.o. It’s not as amusing as it sounds. Flozak try a punt, decide against it, and go for the biking instead. By now CageyII have joined the Twins waiting for a chartered bus. Cagey Ken voices-over that they are both the Outsider Teams - haha, anything to link his team with the Thrillingly Good Looking Twins. Back with our Hapless Alliance, FloZach have reached the bridge, only to discover that they must nevertheless use a punt to reach the dangling clues. Zach is such a prick - he leaves Flo straddling two boats and she has to screech at him to help her. What putzes. How can she think he’s marriage material unless she is looking forward to being on Judge Judy? The Twolanders, CageyII, Airheads, FZCuckoos, MMMkays, and Heave Hos are all ready to take the 7:30 bus to Scotland. Time for some more pithy comments. Lady Airhead says the twins got nothing but good looks and straight teeth. Twolanders hope the Alliance sticks together and end up looking foolish. Even money on that one, Twinnies. Ether grumbles to Heave that she has too much crap in her backpack and won’t Heave help her out by carrying some of her stuff? Heave says she’s already carrying mostly her own stuff, so I gather that she’s already helping Ether to carry hers. I’m really hoping to see them dump that crap onto a lobby sofa somewhere so we get to see whatall Team Clueless are carrying - makeup, blowdryer, law books, extra outfits, - I mean, aren’t you curious? And yes, we did get yet another comment that the Alliance’s objective is to catch up with the Twins. WooHoo - they’re all caught up. Not like it will help, tho. I think it’s pathetic that they’re so pre-occupied with the damn twins - just run the race, dammit. Spooky Team and the SAPs are just now arriving at Heathrow. Oh and the Terriers too. Somehow the Spookies get to Scudamore’s with little ado way ahead of the SAPs, and having gotten their clue are running around asking “Parker’s Piece? Is this the way to Parker’s Piece?” The clock counts down their brave attempt to get to the bus, and we have to have a commercial break to add yet more suspense, but we learn that yes, phew, the Spookies DID get to the 10pm bus with barely a minute to spare. The SAPs and Terriers do the punting in the dark, but we only see the mishaps of the dogs, as they wrestle and tussle with the map and the punt and generally everything, given that it’s dark and the flashlight is in the bottom of the backpack. More and more I’m convinced that Ian is really Harrison Ford remaking Mosquito Coast with his “RL” wife Mary Tyler Moore. Teams are arriving in Aberdeen where they take a taxi to get to the field in Stonehaven. The front-runner teams are in a convoy, then one team takes a different route, somebody comments - uhoh there goes whoever it was and haha. FloZach see the Twins in a taxi and Zach does the finger waggle on the nose trick, to which one Twolander waves sweetly, some might say gaily. MMMkays’ driver is an Aberdeen taxi and doesn’t know the Stonehaven streets. It’s just a mucky mess, but teams are finally starting to arrive at the field. Teams have to decide to send someone feeling “gamey” which seems to invite a lot of negative comment about being in the same clothing for more than 3 days, but what the hell - we’re ALL feeling gamey, as in been sittin’ here, in the same clothes for almost an hour, watching these idiots scramble to do pretty simple basic stuff. It’s Roadblock Time, which Phil in another blue-screen moment helpfully explains that it’s a task only one team member can do. The three activities are taken from the Highland Games: (1) Caber Toss is a long pole that must be thrown so that it flies end over end and lands inside a narrow set of lines marked in the grass. (2) Hammer Throw involves throwing a hammer-like object so it lands in a tiny spot. (3) The Shotput is a heavy rock that has to be thrown as many times as needed to reach the finish line, at which point the clue for the Pit Stop is acquired. Ken, Heather, Derek, Zack & Aaron all do the Roadblock for their respective teams. Aaron throws like a girl, runs like a girl and bitches like a girl - why am I surprised? Lady A tells him to throw the shotput overhand, not underhand. Wow, a whole speech out of her without a mention of the Twins. Must be a record. The Pit Stop is 800 year old Dunnottar Castle, which is reached on foot by leaving the field through a marked fence and running along ancient paths to land on the mat inside the castle’s outer walls. The accommodations appear to be moving slowly towards modern day: those bungalows were probably built 1000 years ago, then the 850 year old monastery, now an 800 year old castle-fortress. By the end, we should see teams bedding down in some kind of nightmarish Japanese cubby-hole hotel. Meanwhile, Dad & Son decided back in Mexico to go for the Fast Forward, declaring that it is their last chance to get back in the race, gamble big to win big, rah rah blah. From Heathrow it was straight to the Duxford Imperial War Memorial, where they had to drive a tank around an obstacle course in less than a minute and a half. Dad successfully completes the task on first attempt, Son is thrilled and then they get a chauffer-driven limo complete with at least one bottle of wine. While enroute we get a “cheer” from Son: “Dennis & Andrew are fast, they drove that tank across the grass, We’re so quick, we’re gonna kick your *bleep* “ Andrew then says he can’t finish the cheer properly cuz he’ll get in trouble if he says ‘ass’ - but when he says the word Dad hits him in the shoulder. A veritable laugh riot, these two :rolleyes. Teams are starting to arrive at the Pit Stop, see list below. John Vito and Jill have just arrived at the Highland Games, and spunky little Jill takes it on and does well. Must be much later that Teri Terrier does the games, with Harrison Fordian giving her pointers. She snaps, “Don’t give me instructions - you didn’t want to do this.” She does complete it, but watching Ian scissor-run along as Teri finished tasks was one of the more hilarious moments - he resembled a robot even more than a dog, moving as tho his legs were incapable of bending at the knee. The SAPs arrived after the Terriers and finished ahead of them. The LIST: Twolander - Team #1 (used FF in ep2) They are happy to have the Alliance as their opponents. “Woo Hoo” they cry, ”We came first without a Fast Forward!” They must think they’ll get to have another FF - what a dumbass comment. They hugged and practically kissed. Look away, children, look away. CageyII -Team #2 - Ken & Gerry. Ken looked for a moment like he was forgetting he was with his brother, and not some guy it’s okay to kiss. (Let’s not forget they used FF in ep1) Looks like the FF is helping these two teams keep up their lead, but how long can it last? One Flo Over the Cuckoo Zach - Team #3 Lord & Lady Airhead - Team # 4 Team Clueless - Team #5, Heave and Ether MMMKay - Team #6 6 Sets of Balls - Team #7 - John Vito, Jill and Dead Brother SAPs - Team #8 Andre & Damon, the Serve & Protects Terriers - Team #9 - Ian is so happy he says, “Beam Me Up Scotty” Teri looks at him as if to say, “would someone please, just for a few hours?” And last but not least - Sis Boom Pa, my original Cage Aux Folles, who enjoyed their wine, and a lovely slow ride through the countryside, but forgot to think about how long it takes to travel by car versus by plane. So the demise I’d planned last ep for the Twins happened to them: they are eliminated from the Race, clutching their useless Fast Forward. Andrew repeated that the experience was about getting his dad to see him as an adult, but I won’t repeat that Andy should reconsider his career as a cheerleader. Dad told Son he loves him and that if he ever thinks of another adventure, to not forget about old Dad. So they’re a happy set of losers, and now they’re done, gone, finished, buh-bye. My tv station promised scenes of next time, but didn’t deliver. I reckon it’s a no-brainer that the Airhead Alliance mentions getting, lying to, or screwing over the Twins at least 25 times, CageyKen drools on the twins at least twice, Zach finds yet another way to leave Flo out on a limb, and the Twolanders laugh as the Anti-Twin Alliance fumble and drop the ball. I’m guessing that nobody will be eliminated, cuz there are 4 non-elimination rounds to squeeze in with only 10 more eps to go. I’ll still be watching, cuz it’s hard to do a recap if I don’t. I do think it’ll be worth seeing who treats the non-elimination as an excuse to slack off, forgetting that finishing time in Ep 4 determines starting time in Ep 5, a round that will likely be an elimination round. Now back to our regularly scheduled Survivor bitching and complaining er I mean speculation...   Top

Red Lady 2010 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Roller Coaster Inaugurator" 10-17-02, 10:39 PM (EST) 3. "RE: AMAI's TAR3 Summaries" OMH Amai..two summaries in one! ROFL times two! Regards,   Top

StarvingButStrong 74 desperate attention whore postings DAW Level: "Hollywood Squares Square" 10-23-02, 11:22 PM (EST) 5. "RE: AMAI's TAR3 Summaries" Wicked good summaries! I do *not* get the thinking of the anti-Twin alliance. What in the world do they think they would gain by finishing ahead of them in episode 2/3/4/etc? Concentrate on finishing in the front half of the pack, conserve your energy, and plan your own moves. All finishing first in any episode but the last does is *maybe* get you another trip somewhere. How long do you think it will be after this race before the idea of more travel won't sicken you?   Top

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