|
|
|
|
PLEASE NOTE: The Reality TV World Message Boards are filled with desperate
attention-seekers pretending to be one big happy PG/PG13-rated family. Don't
be fooled. Trying to get everyone to agree with you is like herding cats,
but intolerance for other viewpoints is NOT welcome and respect for other
posters IS required at all times. Jump in and play, and you'll soon find out
how easy it is to fit in, but save your drama for your mama. All members are
encouraged to read the
complete guidelines.
As entertainment critic Roger
Ebert once said, "If you disagree with something I write, tell me so, argue
with me, correct me--but don't tell me to shut up. That's not the American way."
|
|
|
"Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 "
Cygnus X1 7505 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
|
02-13-06, 11:31 AM (EST)
 
  |
|
"Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
LAST EDITED ON 02-14-06 AT 00:54 AM (EST)All this rumor-mongering about SO's cancellation has to stop. Until we can get plausible denial. Although I do admit it'd give me more time to work with Paris and Nicole on The Simple Life, ifyouknowwhatImean. And how come we're getting pre-empted by the Olympics? Although I wouldn't mind lugeing with Rhonda, iykwim. 
ADMINISTRIVIA:Have at it! Talk amongst yourselves as your characters about current SO events, snipe at each other (in character), whatever! Remember to use your sigs, or at least sign off as your characters. You guys rocked during Week 1! Good for you! If you want to join in as a RECURRING character, please sign up in the signup thread before posting. IYANLA IS AVAILABLE. Her poster had to back out. First to sign up in the signup thread gets her. Iyanla is gotten, by SeasonedRefinement.
Also, Sommer is available, as quiller is now Kelly.
Welcome to lifeless_93 as the Self-Portraits. We have a few posters who have NOT yet posted as their characters. If we don't hear this week from Allison, Bethany, Kim, the Kitchen, the Vicodin Bottle, or Mr. Internet (e-mail or PM me if I forgot any others), I'll be forced to open up those roles next week. At this time, the following characters are claimed: LCs: Rhonda, Iyanla, Dr. Stan
Season 3 HGs: Allison, Christie, Christina, Jodi, Kim, Lisa, nuLisa, TJ, Jill, Buffy, Kelly
Previous season HGs: Bethany, Towanda, Maureen, Andy
Others: Bead Shop Owner, Mr. Internet, the SO Car, the Universe, the Cupcakes, the Kitchen, the Vicodin Bottle, Garden Buddha, the Confessional Chair, the Self-Portraits Do NOT post as a character that's been claimed. Thanks. You can post as ad hoc, one-time characters WITHOUT signing up. If you intend to reuse your character, please do sign up...thanks! And HAVE FUN! Non-players: THIS IS NOT A DISCUSSION THREAD. Discussion-type posts may be removed. E-mail or PM me with any problems.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
susan765 166 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-13-06, 01:34 PM (EST)
|
|
1. "Monday in the car" |
Monday Morning:Ok I'm feeling a little put upon. Now all the ladies who drive me keep talking about shouting out to "The Universe". If this is the only way to gets things done around here than here's my shout out. I NEED A CLEANING! There are crumbs all over. There are food wrappers everywhere. Under the back seat is a leaking water bottle that doesn't smell like any water I've had in my radiator. And the combined smell of malt liquor and breath mints is not pleasent, can you get me one of those pine tree thingies? Don't forget to run me through a car wash because last night someone was really rocking my bumper and they left a really sticky mess behind. Monday Night:
All the women driving to the Country Bar, Radio Playing
Losing My Religion(R.E.M.)
Life is bigger
It's bigger than you
And you are not me
The lengths that I will go to
The distance in your eyes
Oh no I've said too much
I set it up That's me in the corner
That's me in the spotlight
Losing my religion
Trying to keep up with you
And I don't know if I can do it
Oh no I've said too much
I haven't said enough
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try Every whisper
Of every waking hour I'm
Choosing my confessions
Trying to keep an eye on you
Like a hurt lost and blinded fool
Oh no I've said too much
I set it up Consider this
The hint of the century
Consider this
The slip that brought me
To my knees failed
What if all these fantasies
Come flailing around
Now I've said too much
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try But that was just a dream
That was just a dream
|
|
|
Top |
| |
 |
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
02-13-06, 02:11 PM (EST)
|
|
2. "RE: Monday in the car" |
Well, maybe we can get Lou to come in and clean you. He has great experience! And while he's here, I'll ask Andy to give him a makeover. Wait, no, his hair is scary enough already, no makeover needed! I have an idea, car. After you are cleaned, perhaps Andy could give YOU a makeover. Andy? Please tell us, what wonders could you work for this car? 
Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
|
Ijustsharted 518 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Reality Show Commentator"
|
02-14-06, 02:27 PM (EST)
|
|
12. "RE: Monday in the car" |
Why didnt I get a bra?!?!?!? You know how I need one the most! Right now all I have are bandaids that I stole from the SO house. IT'S NOT FAIR!!!!
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
|
JavaT 189 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-16-06, 08:39 AM (EST)
|
|
32. "RE: Monday in the car" |
Ooooooo, dear car, I amSOOOO sorry I haven't gotten back to you sooner. I just got my latest Web stats and Scents of Style is starting to Stink. So I've been in a real snit about that.Never mind the fact that my weed whacker broke during my last eyebrow tweeze, and I've had the darned thing in the shop all week. Sigh... But it's not all about me, is it?! Why, yes it is, come to think of it... but oh, yeah, about you, Car, I don't see why we can't march you down to ROTFL in Beverly Hills and get you a nice new bra. Does wonders for bug protection out on the open road. And just like I always say, all you need are a couple of anchor pieces to tighten up that look. Perhaps some new dull highlights like I suggested for Jessica will skinny up those fenders. Something else, Car -- I have noticed that sometimes your license plate is blurred out, and sometimes it's not. What's up with that? Do I sense a vain attempt at being noticed? Are you trying to attract perhaps the wrong element? Maybe the kind of guy who would try and look up your tag number and get in touch with you? Perhaps you should speak with your LC... 
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
02-18-06, 10:38 PM (EST)
|
|
47. "RE: Monday in the car" |
Hmmm...I could hook up our car (and may I say, the makeover makes you look ten years younger!) with a meaningless date with a camera-loving Mercedes. That just might be the boost to her self-esteem our lovely car needs, and would help to conquer her fears. And it would help the Mercedes to get his exposure he needs (he is still jealous of "Herbie") to get his film career going. All right, dear?*posing by car* Please, Chuck, get a good shot of me with the bra.
Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
Ijustsharted 518 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Reality Show Commentator"
|
02-14-06, 11:49 AM (EST)
|
|
8. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
I just thought that I would pop in so you guys can see how pretty I am!! HEY EVERYBODY COME AND SEE HOW GOOD I LOOK!!!
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
turquiosedove 100 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-14-06, 12:44 PM (EST)
|
|
10. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
*Huge Bead Sale* Ladies I just recieved a shipment of new beads. Come in some time and browse. I recently rearranged some counters and have more room for all the cameras and crew, so you don't have to sit out on the sidewalk. I *can't* wait to see ya!!
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
02-15-06, 11:22 AM (EST)
|
|
21. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
LAST EDITED ON 02-15-06 AT 11:27 AM (EST)I would also like an Emmy-shaped charm, if you have any. Well, maybe several, so I can have earrings too.
Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.Edited because of a blonde moment...for some reason, I had amnesia like Bethany and thought my name was "Sahara".
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
turquiosedove 100 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-15-06, 12:49 PM (EST)
|
|
22. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
How bout you bring in the real emmy and I can put a nice heavy chain on it and string the I Love Me beads on it.
Would your stylist Andy Page go for it?? 
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
02-15-06, 04:36 PM (EST)
|
|
24. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
I am SO in love with that idea. But the problem is, The Great BM is the one who has possession of the Emmy.*eyes become fiery, squinty, and evil* *hissing sound comes as teeth turn green* It should be MINE! It should be MINE! It should be MINE! *head spins around* So, can you make a replica of the Emmy for me? That would be so cool.
Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
02-18-06, 10:56 PM (EST)
|
|
49. "I WANT MY EMMY!!!" |
Not even a little replica? And the Great BM just leaves it lying around on the floor. WHY can't I have my OWN Emmy?Can't you even take some of my cheap costume jewelry and melt it down to make one? You could put a big "R" on the front to show it is mine. That nasty Iyanla wants everything that is mine. My man, my job, my fame, my fortune, my charming personality, my blonde, sexy, trim, and lithe good looks... *smoke comes out of ears* *face turns beet red* Turn off the #### cameras. I SAID turn them off!!!! *begins to beat camera man over the head with camera* I WANT MY EMMY!!!! I WANT MY EMMY!!!! I WANT MY EMMY!!!! *sinks to floor in a sobbing, crumpled heap* If *sob* you can't make me *sniff* *sniff* the Emmy with the "R", *whimper* could you get beads *choke* *gasp* that say, THE EMMY *sob* SHOULD BE *blow nose* MINE? *sob*
Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
JavaT 189 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-16-06, 08:55 AM (EST)
|
|
33. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
LAST EDITED ON 02-16-06 AT 09:00 AM (EST)Dearest Bead Store Owner, You have no idea how tacky it would look for Rhondog's Emmy to be strung with beads. I really think it would gather her negative life force powers and confuse her positive energy with that of her low self-esteem... or something like that. Actually, the truth is, I deserve the Emmy, and I will succeed! Just put up that velvet rope when I come over, because I don't need anyone else trying to schmooze their way in and ride to stardom on my oh-so-stylish coattaiils. Speaking of beads, do you give any discounts for Mardi Gras throw beads? I'd like for everyone to think I was flashing guys at the festival, but of course I'd never do it for real.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
turquiosedove 100 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-16-06, 01:17 PM (EST)
|
|
36. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
LAST EDITED ON 02-16-06 AT 01:40 PM (EST)
Tacky-Shmacky
If the Diva wants to put on her emmy let her. Why you are her stylist I do not know!!
You deserve the lemmy-all your makeovers are lemons-they suck! And yes we have the Mardi Gras beads, they might not fit over your inflated head, err I mean come in any time. 
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
susan765 166 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-14-06, 01:18 PM (EST)
|
|
11. "Tuesday in the car" |
Tuesday:The shout out really helped! Some one was out here clearing out the smelly bottles, wrappers, and buffing up my bumper. MMMMM made me feel kind of good! Hey Universe can you give a hoolar to Buffy and ask if she's up for a road trip? She can get me out of this car nightmare LA. I wouldn't mind visiting TJ. Now there was a women who knew how to clean a car. All the women driving to the bra store:
Playing on the Radio The Smith's "Some Girls Are Bigger Than Others" From the ice-age to the dole-age
There is but one concern
I have just discovered : Some girls are bigger than others
Some girls are bigger than others
Some girl's mothers are bigger than
Other girl's mothers
Some girls are bigger than others
Some girls are bigger than others
Some girl's mothers are bigger than
Other girl's mothers
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
02-15-06, 07:11 AM (EST)
|
|
15. "Calling all ladies!!!!" |
Oh, ladies, it is time for group! Come on, now, it is a fearless day! You are ALL required to come to group, you know. If Kim does not show up, I just may have to kick her out of the house because I like Lisa1 better to show her who is in charge here. (Yes, Mr. Murray, I know it is really you. Do you think I would have put up with that twit otherwise?)Our topic today is Hunger. What are you really hungry for? Are you hungry for change? Are you hungry for control? Are you hungry for your housemates' blood? Today we will do an experiment to show you what really drives you. In front of you, there is a platter with your name on it. It contains the food for which you have the highest degree of hunger. Your assignment today is to eat every morsel of food on the platter. Each time you eat, please kneel before Elder Stateswoman Jill and tell her exactly how you felt when you ate the food. Jill, you simply look in the mirror and tell yourself, please. Please be humorous and cry when necessary. Then we will make a comparison of your feelings about the food and feelings about what non-physical things you really are hungry for. Tonight, please write a letter to your food. Tell your food how much you enjoy it and all that it has done for you. Forgive your food for controlling you. Tell your food what you are really hungry for and why you must give it up. Then we will sit around the fire and burn the letters, watching the smoke go out into the universe. This signifies your burning desire for change (or control, or your housemates' blood, or a meaningless date with a DAW, which I would gladly arrange). Now, Jill, remember the cupcakes are a lesson, so don't hesitate to eat them. And Christie, I know you will love the platter full of sausage. I need you girls to look good and plump to make me look thinner. Don't forget, you must complete the assignment! Please discuss your feelings about this exercise and your progress on here throughout the day. Have a fearless day! I love me, I love me, I love me....(gives self a hug)
Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
SeasonedRefinement 1248 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
|
02-15-06, 11:16 AM (EST)
|
|
20. "RE: Calling all ladies!!!!" |
LAST EDITED ON 02-15-06 AT 11:19 AM (EST)LAST EDITED ON 02-15-06 AT 11:17 AM (EST) (Iyanla is on the nods sitting next to Rhonda. Her head is bobbing back and forth; her eyes open wide and then close to a mere sliver. She is struggling to stay awake...) AAHHH YEAHH! I'm awake!!! Ding dong your doorbell is ringin'...I mean, how ya livin' ladies? Uh-Oh, you're all lookin' at me like, "That woman has gone and lost her mind"...but I was just meditatin'. Yah, it looks like sleep, but it is the highest form of wakefulness there is. Ummhmm. I'm sure you've all noticed by now, but it bears repeatin'. I am on a higher plane of existence than most life coaches...any life coaches, actually. Well, anyway...I guess I already said my cliche greetin's, right? I mean, if I'm sittin' in this chair, I must have walked my ample behind through the door which means I've covered the preliminaries. So...let's all take a deeeeep cleansin' breath...hold it, hold it....and release. Once again, hold it...release. Rhonda, you're not breathin' the way I said to. That doesn't just hurt you - it hurts our followers - I mean clients. Please, be an example to our followers - I mean clients. Open yourself and become sensitive to the soul pollution that exists in this room - I mean sanctuary. I am the "great mother" and, unlike you, I feeeeel all of the pain and filth these women bring to the sistahhood...and it hurts me Rhonda. You hurt me because you are are a cold and unfeelin' woman. And have I mentioned vain? You've had so much surgery on your face that you have a recedin' hairline. And let's face it Rhonda, you can't afford to get sloppy with that hair. It ain't your strong suit, ya know. You're a textbook lifecoach, you're not a "feeler". Please Rhonda, be a part of the solution. OK, movin' right along. Rhonda has already introduced our topic. Our topic is ah, um, yah, let me break this down for ya now. I'm gonna make this reeeaaaal simple for ya. (frantically shuffling through index cards) Ahah! Yessss. Food, Dee-zire, hun-gah! What are you hungry for? Now Miss Jill, I like you. I like you more than all the other ladies all put together and tied up with a big red bow. So, I had a hand in puttin' this assignment together as a special treat for you. You've caught my eye Miss Jill - oh yes you have. I might want you to be my gopher - I mean assistant - in the future. That means sayin' goodbye to that dream of being a Jenny Craig model. Who are we kiddin' anyway? Certainly not the folks at Jenny Craig. A-ha-ha-ha! They stopped callin' and askin' about missin' your weigh-ins. Ooh, and that tall, skinny boy that counseled you down at Jenny Craig? Well, he is ticked off in a big way. Seems he liked seein' his face on TV. He thinks he has star quality! Anyway, face it girl! You ain't gonna lose that heft - not now, not eva - so, embrace it. Apologize to the cupcake for ignorin' it and start livin' large! I am not "one" with the rest of the assignment - I don't really know what else Rhonda had to say because I only really care about Miss Jill, and besides, I was sleepin' - I mean meditatin' while Rhonda was talkin'. I can guess that it will end with letter writin' and burnin' things though. Yep...writin' and burnin' what you write are keys to power. So, you ladies do whateva you were told to do. Be a great day and live large. I have to go pick up my red and gold brocade jacket from the cleaners. Someone - I will mention no names - got a little sloppy with their sinus fluids and deposited some on my left lapel. The things I endure for the benefit of other women...
IYANLA
Edited for sig - will get it right next time!
*****************************************
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
02-18-06, 11:19 PM (EST)
|
|
51. "RE: Calling all ladies!!!!" |
Iyanla, I am so glad you are here so we can do group together. *fake smile for camera* You say you are on a higher plane...how about getting on a plane? The higher, the better.Oh, Lord, who let Maureen come inside to group? *cough* *cough* This is not a cleansing breath, Iyanla! *cough* *cough* Well, Miss Crush-em-with-your-hug-until-they-are-so-smothered-they-work-hard-enough-to-graduate-so-you-will-quit Iyanla, I am not the least bit vain. I just have a very accurate view of myself and sense of self-love. I use it as an example to the women of how wonderful they should strive to be, though they will never attain my level of perfection. I am NOT cold and unfeeling...just ask Jon-Boy Mr. Murray. Aren't I a feeler, Mr. Murray? *mutters to self* I love me, I love me, I love me, I love me... *leans in closely to Iyanla and puts on clenched jaw smile* Get a good shot of this, Ray, it will help the ratings.
Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
02-18-06, 11:27 PM (EST)
|
|
52. "RE: Calling all ladies!!!!" |
Iyanla, we have a serious problem here. Not ONE of our ladies has bothered to complete her "hunger" assignment. Do you notice...not one has posted one thing about this assignment as ordered? What are we going to do?I can throw a temper tantrum...I will tomorrow if need be. What will you do? What do you think...I think we may have to have a Board of Review to sufficiently scare them into pretending they are really changing. Please get back to me ASAP. This is very important, because you know I don't give second chances. *cough* *cough* These women have to learn their lesson.
Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
susan765 166 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-15-06, 01:55 PM (EST)
|
|
23. "Wed. in the car" |
Wed afternoon :
Driving to the prop shop, all the women in car:I'm feeling just way too much stress. There's all these bad vibes coming from the women and its starting to effect my engine. There is only one steering wheel for a reason! Only one driver allowed! Snippy comments make the driver squeeze the wheel and slow my reaction time. Please sit back and sleep - sorry I meant meditate while another is driving. Playing on the radio: Control - Janet Jackson
This is a story about control, my control
Control of what I say, control of what I do
And this time I'm gonna do it my way
I hope you enjoy this as much as I do
Are we ready?
I am
Cause it's all about control
and I've got lots of it
When I was 17, I did what people told me
Did what my father said, and let my mother mold me
But that was long ago I'm in control, never gonna stop
Control, to get what I want
Control, I got to have a lot
Control, now I'm all grown up..... ..That's right, I'm on my own
I'll call my own shots
Thank you Got my own mind
I wanna make my own decisions
When it has to do with my life, my life
I wanna be the one in control So let me take you by the hand
And lead you on this dance
Cause what I've got is because I took a chance
I don't wanna rule the world
Just wanna run my life
So make your life a little easier
When you get the chance just take Free at last, out here on my own
Now control this
That's right, career moves
I do what's right for me
And me wants to groove
Is that ok? Hop to it
I'm in control (and I love it, that's right)
Control, now I've got a lot
Control, now I'm all grown up
I'm in control, I'm in control
Don't make me lose it
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
lillysmommy2005 8 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "American Cancer Society Spokesperson"
|
02-15-06, 07:59 PM (EST)
|
|
26. "RE: Wed. in the car" |
For the love of Christmas! Don't ya'll love my scarf! I guess I don't look like a snoman afterall......I'm beautiful!My interview with the headhunter went pretty well today. Proud of myself, IMHO! Where the hell is that d@mn LISA! I have been calling her for 4 days!! Geez girl, pick up the phone, or at least email me! (We all know that you know how to do that well!) Did she waste all of our time? YUP! Go figure! I can't stand the conflamma with Kelly and Kim and Jodi! Kelly's gonna crack soon! 
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
pinksparkleguitar 1222 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
|
02-15-06, 10:57 PM (EST)
|
|
27. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
Rhonda - the great and wise Buddha would like to offer his shoulder when John-boy does not show up. The great Buddha has seen him with an intern a lot lately . . . .maybe called Buffy? Muffy? Luffy? No Buffy. And she talked about TJ alot.Anyway, we can talk and meditate about the lovely Lisa N and meditate her away into our subconcious and she will be completley gone! ACtually, I suspect that the reason why she is not returning anybody's calls is that she finally ran out of souls. I believe she was on her 9th or 10th (she was getting them black market, I certainly wasn't providing anymore reincarnations for her!!) and she lost that one as well. Perhaps we will finally be rid of her forever. Buddha would like to also congratulate and thank Kim for stying away from Buddha in the last week, I lived a much quieter life. If now I can only get Allison and Maureen out of the guest house (and get Maureen to stop using me to stub out her ciggies) Buddha will be in a subliminal state of mind. Can we also keep Jodi away from me? She is obscene, and after today smells like fish, which Buddha is suprisingly allergic to. Maybe the universe can help me out? Or maybe the car can lock her iside for a while. or the kitchen cabinet can get in with he fridge and tempt her with good savory food! the Great and Wise inanimate objects must stick together. The wise and honorable Buddha also prescribes lots of Yoga and meditation for all. (and can somebody please get that sappy 'let love grow in your garden' or whatever that sign says out of my garden? It is so un-Buddha-like!!)
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
|
lovemydogdude 1253 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Beef Jerky Spokesperson"
|
02-16-06, 02:22 AM (EST)
|
|
29. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
Thank you Iyanla..gulp..I was getting a little perturbed with all this gossip in the air. As a woman of honor I should feel welcome here. Anyways heehee it's so good to talk to you, you've been so great hee hee. I've noticed you haven't been around much lately but like you said..you'll "always be there with me in spirit" ahhhhh thank you. So I've been working really hard, the night shift, waitressing yeah uhhuh..and spending as much time with Jackson as possible. I'm working lots of overtime though, so I can save money for my move to LA. Mom's been a real help..yeah....Oh!..Jackson was really sick the other night! Mom had to take him to the hospital because he was coughing so hard. I can't remember what his temperature was but I guess it was bad..anyhow he seems better now. I hope I don't get it. well my 2 weeks of art classes are over, I loved them so much! They had an evening class which worked out perfect with my schedule. I'm thinking about volunteering at a preschool teaching arts and crafts..my Dad told me I'd be good at it..
hee hee By the way if Jodie really does smell like fish that ointment you bought for me might work for her too..thank you again for helping me keep all those secrets. 
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
SeasonedRefinement 1248 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
|
02-16-06, 08:37 AM (EST)
|
|
31. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
Ahh, Miss Christina...how ya livin?I'm burstin' with pride...you used a very big word - "perturbed". Before becoming my disciple, you would have said, "pissed off", and you would have sounded like every other skanky ho on the strip. See how honorable you've become, little pilgrim? Anyway my love, don't be too upset over all the talk. The really vile - oops - I mean bad - stuff they've said about you has been the stuff you didn't hear. I'd be happy to chastise them for their evil speakin', but you know the rules. It isn't gossip unless the victim hears it themselves. So, you'll either have to start hiding behind the sofa or in closets to get the gossip - or just give it up. OK, Miss Christina? I'm happy to hear that your mama is still watchin' little Jefferson. He was such an unforgettable little boy. Did any of those agencies call you about representin' him? If I said it once, I said it a hundred times, little Jason could be an actor or a model. Yes sir, Miss Christina, little Joshua left quite an impression on me. Let's hope your mama does right by him. I'd hate to see little Johnathon gettin' married at 13 just to keep a family tradition alive. Yes sir, I will never forget that little boy - I feel like he's one of my own. Keep working Miss Christina. Call out to the universe, she won't disappoint. Just look at me. Oh, one last thing. Don't go sharin' that ointment I gave to you with anyone else. It's a special potion I picked up in New Orleans and it was something made especially for STD's - I mean you. Remember, I explained all of that back when I gave it to you with that can of industrial disinfectant I told you to spray on the commode after you used it? The ointment is for your lady parts...you know the places that were burnin' you so bad? It wouldn't help Jodi, darlin'. Dream big and live large.
******************************************* 
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
pmfmpls 149 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-16-06, 08:27 AM (EST)
|
|
30. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
GUEST HOUSE??!!
I am in that FRICKIN' cardboard box!! Some fat, alcoholic told me there was no room in the guest house, but that I could have all the empties outside the door. I biked 'em over to the recycle center, and I got almost $8!!Okay, been working on my comedy between smoke breaks: How can you tell if Allison's been in the Jacuzzi? By the wine glass rings around the edge, and the boob hair clogging the drain!!! Love you gals!! Mo 
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
02-16-06, 11:20 AM (EST)
|
|
34. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
Oh, dear Mo, I am sorry there is no room in the guest house, but as I said before, TJ and Allison are taking up all the room in there. I saw TJ returning from the store with what looked like 20 boxes of band-aids...I am sure plenty of blood has been shed by now. Plus, TJ has already done her time in a box, and I don't know if Allison would fit. She is not skinny and lithe like me. *several poses for camera* Well, I must go practice my ugly mean scowl face to keep it in shape. My mother used to tell me that if I kept making that face it would stay that way, and bless her, she was right!
Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
02-18-06, 11:39 PM (EST)
|
|
53. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
Oh, Buddha who is almost as great and wise as I am, thank you for your wise suggestions and offers of comfort.What is this about the skanky Buffy????!!!! She'd better not show her face around me, or I'll put her in a baby dress faster than you can say "Be fearless". I am confused, Buddha, and need your wisdom. Why is it that Lisa called me 972 times last weekend until I destroyed my cell phone, and then the housemates hear no word from her? So do you think she finally did run out of souls? Or is that unlimited like her chances with me are?
Be fearless, but be fearful of ME.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
|
pinksparkleguitar 1222 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
|
02-20-06, 04:03 PM (EST)
|
|
64. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
Ahhh Rhonda,
There are some things that even the great Buddha does not know.
I have sent one of my deity friends to check up on the situation, seeing as how by my calculations she should have been reincarnated into a small, crooked, bamboo shoot by now. But Lisa has learned to dodge me quite often. (sometimes I ust don't see her as the great Buddha has learned to close his eyes to small annoyances.)I will let you know when I reach Nirvana later today and can truly ask my inner eye where she is. Whoops, Buddha slipped into another religion there for a second . . . . Rhonda, remember that Buddha loves you, and I will keep an eye on the Buffy later for you.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
susan765 166 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-16-06, 12:46 PM (EST)
|
|
35. "Thursday in the Car " |
Thursday:Hey Universe! What's up? I'm feeling a little down because they keep sending all the women together places. All those big bold living life too the fullest ladies is not a good thing in little old me. I drive in mortal fear that an old fashion cat fight is going to break out! And I'm the one who will suffer! You just can't find a good body shop anymore. So send me some peace rays. All the ladies driving to the retirement home:
The Cranberries playing on the radio:
Empty Something has left my life,
And I don't know where it went to, ah, ha, ha.
Somebody caused me strife,
And it's not what I was seeking. Didn't you see me, didn't you hear me?
Didn't you see me standing there, ah, ha, ha?
Why did you turn out the lights?
Did you know that I was sleeping? Say a prayer for me,
Help me to feel the strenght, I did.
My identity, has it been taken?
Is my heart breakin' on me? All my plans fell though my hands,
They fell though my hands on me.
All my dreams it suddenly seems,
It suddenly seems,
Empty, i, i, i (X 7)
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
pmfmpls 149 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-17-06, 09:03 PM (EST)
|
|
41. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
It's MO!!! With another new joke for the current houseguests:Knock-Knock... Who's there? Jill's daddy.... Jill's daddy who? Jill's daddy who didn't bother with her for 41 years, so why bother now?? Oh! That's right! This is B*&^SH*T TV and they'll pay him enough to give a rat's @$$ about the daughter he never met from the woman he abandoned decades ago!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
shawnar 366 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Cooking Show Host"
|
02-17-06, 11:39 PM (EST)
|
|
46. "RE: Be The Houseguest Roleplay Thread - Week 2 " |
Well I have been really lonely. Everyone upest me yesterday when I wanted to talk about being lonely. I even said I love you to Jodi and she didn't respond. I realize what you were trying to do Rhonda but how alone am I with all the camera men? Today was fun I loved having my hair teased like I wore in Junior high. I didn't get a chance to get my story aired ya know with all that editing. It was a good story too. I was very shy and didn't have many friends because I was always trying to cover up my moms drug abuse. One day they did a random locker search and founds pills in my book bag. My mom had hid them there don't ask me why. Anyways No one believed me and I was the talk of the school.Everyone thought I was an addict. That was the turning point in my life I decided I might as well live up to what everyone believed of me.
I almost got caught be Kim. I was shoving a cupcake in and I didn't log it!
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
Cygnus X1 7505 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Playboy Centerfold"
|
02-20-06, 07:12 AM (EST)
|
|
56. "New thread up this afternoon or evening " |
And we will have some roles available. Hope there's still some interest in playing!
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
Sahara 759 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Fitness Correspondent"
|
02-20-06, 10:11 AM (EST)
|
|
57. "RE: New thread up this afternoon or evening " |
Me too, I'm getting tired of talking to myself. That is just my normal activity anyway.
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
pmfmpls 149 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-20-06, 10:41 AM (EST)
|
|
58. "RE: New thread up this afternoon or evening " |
Mo here!!!I'm out there looking for some comedy gigs....Sadly, all the comedy clubs have seen my act, and few are interested. Even with all my new material!! Contractually, I don't get to use any of the SO girls in my act, so I am stuck with divorce and jacuzzi jokes. If ONLY I could tell the world my SO jokes!! In addition to the 3 or 4 I've posted here, I have a brief sample for you'se guys (I'm from Chicago, remember?). Here you go: So, Jill and Jodi woke up early one morning. Jodi heads to the shower first, and is singing so loud in there that Jill can't sleep.
Jill's feeling a bit guilty about her poor weight loss, so she clicks on the TV, and turns it to an old episode of Richard Simmons' exercise show. Now, Jill is inherently lazy, so she is just sitting in bed and watching Richard and the big ladies exercise on the screen. Well, Richard's enthusiasm is infectious, so she can't help swaying with the music. Jill starts to get into it, and soon she's reaching, reaching, reaching with her right arm, and reaching, reaching, reaching with her left arm. Her nightgown gets all bunched up, so she figures, "What the heck...I'll just take it off." So, Jill is stark-naked in bed, exercising like crazy with Richard Simmons. At one point, Richard has the ladies flat on their backs doing high leg kicks. Jill lifts her left leg up-down-up-down, and then her right leg up-down-up-down....Richard calls for the ladies to lift both... At that point, Jill lifts both of her meaty limbs high into the air, stretches them back behind her head, and YIKES!! Her feet get caught in the headboard!!!! There she is- NAKED- on her back with both legs stretched backward over her head!! She is Hoo-Hoo to the world! Just at that moment, Jodi emerges from the bathroom. She takes one look at Jill (in that precarious position) and says, "Oh for god's sake Jill!! Brush your hair and put a smile on your face! You're looking more like IYANLA every day"!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
susan765 166 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Blistex Spokesperson"
|
02-20-06, 11:46 AM (EST)
|
|
61. "RE: New thread up this afternoon or evening " |
Monday in the car:I'm sending out a message to MO' I'll drive you around to your comedy auditions. The ladies are so busy back seat driving and living large they'll never notice an extra stop or two. playing on Radio:
Artist: Pink
Song: Get the party started
Album: Misundaztood
<" Misundaztood " CD> I'm comin' up so you better you better get this party startedÂ
I'm comin' up so you better you better get this party started Get this party started on a Saturday nightÂ
Everybody's waitin' for me to arriveÂ
Sendin' out the message to all of my friendsÂ
We'll be lookin' flashy in my Mercedes BenzÂ
I got lotsa style, got my gold diamond ringsÂ
I can go for miles if you know what I mean
I'm comin' up so you better you better get this party startedÂ
I'm comin' up so you better you better get this party started Pumpin up the volume, breakin down' to the beatÂ
Cruisin' through the west sideÂ
We'll be checkin' the sceneÂ
Boulevard is freakin' as I'm comin' up fastÂ
I'll be burnin' rubber, you'll be kissin' my a**
Pull up to the bumper, get out of the carÂ
License plate says Stunner #1 Superstar I'm comin' up so you better you better get this party startedÂ
I'm comin' up so you better you better get this party startedÂ
Get this party started Makin' my connection as I enter the roomÂ
Everybody's chillin' as I set up the grooveÂ
Pumpin' up the volume with this brand new beatÂ
Everybody's dancin' and their dancin' for meÂ
I'm your operator, you can call anytimeÂ
I'll be your connection to the party lineÂ
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
SeasonedRefinement 1248 desperate attention whore postings
DAW Level: "Politically Incorrect Guest"
|
02-20-06, 12:40 PM (EST)
|
|
62. "RE: New thread up this afternoon or evening " |
I don't care how any of ya are livin' today because you are looking at one pissed off lifecoach!First off - hey Universe! You've apparently let it slip your mind that I have done more for you than Carl Sagan or Captain Kirk ever did! I have told the girls to cry out to you because you are currently at the top of the metaphysical food chain! I don't hear the trees and rocks complaining about the ladies' hygiene, hair growth, or positions. Maybe I'll become a Pantheist tomorrow and tell the girls that the really real authentic Supreme Being is in the trees, rocks, grass, dirt, EVERYWHERE. Now where would that leave you? I'll tell you where...right where you are, but with a phone that ain't ringing! Remember, these are MY disciples. They don't really believe in you...they believe in ME! They'll pray to anyone or anything I tell them to. Right now that's you...but if you aren't grateful, it can change...OVA NIGHT!!! And Mo...I ain't supportin' you any more. I never liked your authentic self anyway. I thought you were old, too raspy voiced, and smelled like a cross between a dirty sneaker and an ashtray. And, I know you don't like the bathtub. The girls told me all about it. Covering your body in baking powder don't work girl - that stuff is only for refrigerator odors. I'm thinking your next "gig" is probably in the lounge of your local bowlin' alley, but my reputation extends to even the most humble places. If you say anything about me looking like Jill's lady parts, I swear to all of my gods that I will slap a lawsuit on your ##### so fast that your head will spin. I don't have to cry out to the universe on this one...I make more money in one month than you'll make in a lifetime. Look, I have no problem with you talking about Jill's acrobatics or naked positions. It's open season on poor people, and Jill is poor. No danger of a lawsuit there because Starting Over isn't footing the bill for anymore lawyer bills. But physical assault may be an option Jill choses...and as I said, you are old. Iyanla VanZant ain't nobody's punch line, baby...and I'm a damn sight betta lookin' than anything that Jill is packin' in those size 6X bloomers.
*******************************************
|
|
|
Top |
| |
|
|
|
p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e -
p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e -
p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e -
p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e - p l a c e h o l d e r t e x t g o e s h e r e -
|
|
Email this topic to a friend
Printer-friendly version of this topic
Bookmark this topic (Registered users only)
As for the car - maybe they should just let Lisatwit live in the car and her last assignment would be for HER to clean it - bikini top, hunchback and all. C-ya
JUDGE JUDY